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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27672142">Deep Blue Sea</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jude_Rigby/pseuds/Jude_Rigby'>Jude_Rigby</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Beware Of Darkness [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Castle (TV 2009)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Family, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Romance, The Hamptons</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 23:42:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>109,945</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27672142</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jude_Rigby/pseuds/Jude_Rigby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Late summer after the events in Queens, Castle and Beckett leave the city to put the case behind them and adjust to the changes in their lives. Sequel to Beware of Darkness.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kate Beckett &amp; Richard Castle, Kate Beckett/Richard Castle</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Beware Of Darkness [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2006014</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Every Morning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>The title of this story is from the song Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea, which was written by Ted Koehler; though the version that I know and where I took that lyric is the version recorded by George Harrison on his album Brainwashed. And the title of this chapter is from the song Sun Is Shining by The Fireman (Paul McCartney and Youth) on their album Electric Arguments.</p>
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      <p>Blinking her eyes to try and get the sun out of her face, Beckett soon gave up as the bright light would not go away. Sighing as she opened her eyes, she looked down at Julia; her daughter for the past three months; who was cuddled against her side. She bent down to kiss the top of the four year old's head when her alarm went off and she jumped, startling the little girl awake. "Hey, morning sweetie," she said, smiling when Julia blinked her eyes blearily, looking at her. "Feeling better?"</p>
      <p>"I'm still tired Mommy," Julia said sleepily as Beckett got up off the bed. When she saw her yawning she asked, "Are you sleepy too?"</p>
      <p>"A little," Beckett said, smiling reassuringly at her as she cursed in her mind as she felt tired. "But we need to hurry, I have work and you have camp."</p>
      <p>"Am I going to the zoo today?" Julia asked, seeming to wake up instantly as she jumped up on the bed.</p>
      <p>"You are," Beckett laughed softly at her exuberance as she picked her up and carried her to the other bedroom. "And the Museum of Natural History too."</p>
      <p>"Is that one we went?" Julia asked while Beckett set her down on her bed.</p>
      <p>"That is, with the bears and dinosaurs too," Beckett replied, getting the little girl's camp uniform before starting to change her into it quickly.</p>
      <p>"Oh, and the pretty, shiny stones," Julia said. "I want to see those again. Can't you come with me Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"I can't, I do have a lot of work to do," Beckett said, smiling since Julia asked the same question every morning since she'd started the summer camp. "But I will pick you up, I promise."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, running to the <em>barre</em> in her room when her mother had set her down on the floor. "Can I practice a little?"</p>
      <p>"Until I change and get breakfast," Beckett said, running her hand over the little girl's hair. "And I'll do your hair after we eat. Come when I call you Julia."</p>
      <p>"I will," Julia said, holding onto the bar and putting her feet into the first position.</p>
      <p>Beckett quickly put away Julia's pajamas and then went over to her bedroom, thinking over the past few months since she'd brought the little girl home as her daughter. She was still on probation, half way through, but so far all the visits from Social Services had gone very well, and she was looking forward greatly to the point when she could fully adopt Julia and give her her last name, as the girl still thought that Beckett herself was her birth mother.</p>
      <p>As she grabbed a blouse and black trousers in her closet, Beckett suddenly had to grab the door, feeling a wave of dizziness pass through her. She shook her head as it quickly stopped, and made a mental note to herself to eat something before she and Julia had to leave. She then thought about work as she quickly changed, remembering all the paperwork she had yet to do with an inward groan. Recently she, Castle, Ryan and Esposito had had to investigate three cases, one after another with the last one occurring just as she and Castle had found their killer for the second case. Luckily Ryan and Esposito had started investigating the third murder, but she and Castle had gone on to that case when the two detectives had run into a brick wall with no new suspects to investigate and had been fortunate to find the killers in that case as well.</p>
      <p>Since she had been unable to get the paperwork set for any of the cases in that time, Beckett was still trying to catch up with that and had been working through the three cases for the past two days. She'd gotten a break with there being no new investigations, but she was struggling with some lingering fatigue at the same time and also trying to make sure she was able to care for her daughter. She sighed as she washed her face and looked in the mirror, not shocked at the slightly dark shadows that had begun to form under her eyes. Shaking her head, she hurriedly put on makeup to make that disappear, and then rushed out to the kitchen after catching a look at the time.</p>
      <p>"Julia," Beckett said once she had quickly gotten some oatmeal ready for both herself and Julia. "Sweetie," she called out again when the little girl didn't come out from her room. She looked at the doorway to the bedrooms and she had to smile when her daughter was nowhere to be seen. She set everything on the table and then walked over to the little girl's room where she was practicing still at the <em>barre</em>. "Julia Beckett," she said firmly but not too severely to get her attention. "Did you hear me?"</p>
      <p>"Sorry," Julia said, straightening up and looking down at her feet. "I was hearing the music in my head."</p>
      <p>"That's okay," Beckett said, going over to her and taking her hand. "I already knew you were going to do that. But come on, your breakfast is going to get cold and you need to eat." She led her over to the table and they started to eat, keeping an eye on Julia to make sure that she did eat as the little girl would hum the song she had been practicing to. "Don't worry sweetie," she said finally after she had to urge Julia to eat another spoonful of oatmeal. "You're a very good dancer and I know you'll do perfectly at the recital."</p>
      <p>"But I have to practice Mommy, Madame Claude said," Julia said seriously.</p>
      <p>"And you also need to eat," Beckett said smiling. "So finish up and then I'll do your hair before you go to the zoo."</p>
      <p>It took a little longer for Julia to finish her food, and once she had, Beckett quickly brushed her hair and pulled it into a French braid before she ran to get her Stitch doll and backpack. "I'm ready Mommy," she said, showing her her tennis shoes she had put on.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said, holding onto her work bag. "But I think you should leave Stitch here today."</p>
      <p>"Do I have to," Julia said, slightly whining.</p>
      <p>"I know, but he might get really tired walking so much," Beckett said, setting the doll on the chair she had next to the door; having had the same conversation with her daughter before. "But he'll be right here waiting for us. Let's go." She took Julia's hand and they walked out of the apartment. Outside the building she caught a cab and they drove to Central Park, running down a path after she'd paid the cabbie. They'd run into some traffic and were late and she didn't want Julia to miss leaving for the trip. "Great, we made it," she said, breathing out a sigh of relief.</p>
      <p>"Hello Julia, Ms. Beckett," a woman standing next to a group of kids Julia's age with five other women said as the two approached her. "You just made it, we were about to check the attendance sheet and then leave."</p>
      <p>"Okay Julia, I'll be outside the museum when you're all finished, so stay with the counselors and your friends too," Beckett said, setting down her bag and crouching down so she was face to face with the little girl. "Have a lot of fun and take a lot of pictures."</p>
      <p>"I will," Julia giggled as she looked down at her children's camera Beckett had bought for her. "I'll miss you Mommy, I wish you could come with me," she said, hugging her around the neck.</p>
      <p>"I know sweetie, I do too, but don't worry," Beckett said, hugging her tightly. "We'll go to the zoo or museum this weekend, whichever you want to see again."</p>
      <p>"Really?" Julia asked in excitement. When her mother nodded she squealed slightly and then asked, "Can Alexis and Castle come?"</p>
      <p>"If they want to, we'll see," Beckett said, kissing her cheek. "But have fun now with your friends okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"We need to call attendance Ms. Beckett," one of the counselors said.</p>
      <p>"Right, so I'll see you later, have fun and I love you very much Julia," Beckett said, turning her attention back to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"I love you too Mommy," Julia said as she shared a kiss with her mother and then hugged her tightly as she returned the embrace. She then hurried over to the line of kids who were in pairs, holding hands.</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled as Julia's was the third name to be called, and the little girl quickly said, "Here," in response. She was relieved that the school was using her last name, even though it wasn't officially Julia's yet. But with the little girl believing it was, Beckett didn't want her to start getting confused being called Julia O'Malley, especially with all the therapy she had been taking her daughter to after what had happened to them three months before.</p>
      <p>"Okay kids, remember to hold hands and if you need something, just ask one of us, we'll be walking along beside you," the head counselor said once she had taken attendance. "Alright, here we go."</p>
      <p>"Bye sweetie," Beckett called, waving as Julia turned to her while the line ahead of her and the girl she was holding hands with started to move. She smiled when the little girl waved at her and watched as Julia and her friend walked down the path. She let out a deep breath, shaking the exhaustion that had come on her suddenly. To ignore it she grabbed her phone, checking to see if she had maybe missed a call about a case. She was relieved when there was nothing on the screen, and saw the time realizing that unless she hurried she was going to be late. She turned and went back out to the street, saying hello to a few mothers and fathers she knew from dropping Julia off for the past two months at camp. She ran to the curb to wave down a taxi that wasn't occupied and was driving by at that moment and was just able to get it to stop.</p>
      <p>Beckett caught her breath after giving the address for the 12th Precinct, and sat back against the seat, watching the park, trying to see if she could see her daughter. She couldn't find the bright blue shirt that Julia was wearing, but she still smiled slightly to herself, wondering what the little girl was going to tell her later when she picked her up as she usually did after her day at camp. She found herself dreading going to work and facing the paperwork left to be completed, but she tried to ignore that, knowing if she hurried she could just make it to the museum at four that afternoon to pick up Julia. She got a sudden idea to ask Castle when she saw him about him and Alexis coming over for dinner that night, and she smiled briefly, thinking about that and that weekend's possible plans with Julia as the cab neared the station, not dreading getting to work as much as she had earlier that morning.</p>
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<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Strange Of Late</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter is from the song Mr. Bellamy by Paul McCartney from his album Memory Almost Full.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>Reading over the last paper in her hand, Beckett quickly signed her name at the bottom when someone sat in the chair next to her desk. She looked up and said, "You're late Castle."</p>
      <p>"Sorry, but I swear I was trying to get in on time," Castle joked, smiling as she handed him the pen she was holding. He hurriedly signed the paper where she indicated and said, "Good morning though Detective Beckett."</p>
      <p>"Morning," Beckett replied absently as she flipped through the papers in the file in the middle of her desk.</p>
      <p>"Which case is that?" Castle asked, not surprised that she was focusing on the paperwork.</p>
      <p>"Our last one," Beckett said, stifling a yawn. "By the way, no coffee?"</p>
      <p>"I was late, so I figured it would be a lot a better to just make it here," Castle said. "You didn't have any with breakfast?"</p>
      <p>"Forgot to make some, I was running a little late myself," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Well, that's pretty understandable, you have a daughter," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"And you do too, yet you're a lot later than I was. Now how does that happen exactly Mr. Castle?" Beckett said teasingly to him as she looked up from the first paper she needed to fill out in the file.</p>
      <p>Castle started to open his mouth to reply to that, but then a confused look spread across his face and he glanced at Beckett, seeing she looked bemused as well. "It doesn't make sense does it?" he said.</p>
      <p>"Not really," Beckett said, shaking her head. "But at least you made it before noon."</p>
      <p>"I wouldn't be that late," Castle said, watching as she started to write on the paper in front of her. "Speaking of daughters; how's Julia?" He was a little surprised when Beckett's expression became a little guarded and he said, "Nightmare?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Beckett said with a sigh, looking up from the paper as she was distracted. "That makes it the fourth one this week."</p>
      <p>"What is it she's dreaming about?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>Beckett didn't reply for a moment, and then said, "I'd prefer not to say really."</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle replied easily, knowing she didn't want to really think about the nightmares her daughter was having. "So what was the trip today at camp?"</p>
      <p>"The zoo and the Natural History Museum," Beckett said with a smile. "So she was obviously excited to go."</p>
      <p>"Did she want you to go too?" Castle said. He smiled when Beckett nodded and said, "You should take her this weekend if we're lucky and don't get another case before five today."</p>
      <p>"I'm hoping we don't," Beckett said. "I feel like I've been almost ignoring her with these three past cases. But that reminds me, I actually told her that she could pick one of those places to go to on Saturday and I would take her."</p>
      <p>"Sounds like it'll be fun. I'm going to guess it'll be the museum though," Castle said as he signed the paper she handed to him then.</p>
      <p>"Probably. But she mentioned she wanted to ask if you and Alexis would come with us," Beckett said, glancing around to make sure their co-workers weren't close enough to hear. "And I wanted to ask you both to come over for dinner tonight if you can."</p>
      <p>"I don't have any plans," Castle said. "I think Alexis might have a party to go to tonight though, I'll give her a call."</p>
      <p>"Great," Beckett said, setting aside the first paper. "How is she doing by the way?"</p>
      <p>"Not bad, she still feels guilty she didn't go back to her internship this summer, but I told her she should take a short vacation at least before she starts her second year," Castle replied.</p>
      <p>"How'd she like LA?" Beckett asked a little absentmindedly, writing in the form she was filling out.</p>
      <p>"She loved it, said there are some really great museums there. And she loved Disneyland too," Castle said. "She saw a lot of Stitch stuff, reminded her of Julia."</p>
      <p>Smiling down at the paper Becket said, "I imagine it would. I should take Julia there one day while she's still young."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Alexis said she probably would love it," Castle said. He watched his girlfriend for a moment and then frowned as he noticed something. "Kate," he said, his voice low as he leaned towards her. "Are you okay?"</p>
      <p>"What?" Beckett asked, looking up at him in surprise.</p>
      <p>"You look exhausted, and really pale," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Pale?" Beckett said in slight confusion. "I'm fine, might be the lighting in here."</p>
      <p>"Maybe," Castle said doubtfully. "But have you gotten much sleep this week?"</p>
      <p>"Some," Beckett said, trying to be nonchalant as she picked up the file that held the papers for the first case. "But I'm fine, just really should have made coffee at my place."</p>
      <p>"I can get some for you since I'm not doing anything right now," Castle said, standing up. "I could use some myself."</p>
      <p>"Well, if you wanted me to get some you could file this away…" Beckett said in jest, holding up the file.</p>
      <p>"That's alright," Castle said quickly. "I'll be right back."</p>
      <p>Shaking her head with a slight smile on her face, Beckett called after him, "I'll take it as strong as you can make it," before he disappeared into the break room. She then looked down at her desk and glanced at the framed picture she had placed there three months before when she had returned to work after adopting Julia. She had taken her daughter to Coney Island since the little girl had never been there before. They had gone on some rides and played in the arcade before she'd taken Julia to the beach where they walked on the sand. It was a much happier walk than the one she'd taken with her father after her mother's funeral. She and Julia had picked up shells and a little sand, filling a bowl back at home and placing it in the center of the table, it reminded her of the little stick man she and her father had made during their time on the same beach, but it evoked a lot more positive emotions which she wanted desperately for her daughter. When they'd gone back up to the park she'd taken Julia into a photo booth and they'd taken four pictures together, which she'd copied and brought to work to set on her desk.</p>
      <p>Smiling at the pictures, Beckett stood up and grabbed the file for the second case before she left her desk. She walked to the room where all the paperwork for recent cases was stored, and then headed back to her desk, checking her watch for the time. She was startled it was almost noon, and as she came down the stairs she debated if she wanted to wait for lunch that way she could get further with the paperwork for the last case.</p>
      <p>As she took a step away from the staircase, Beckett suddenly felt as if she had missed a step; though the floor was perfectly even; and grabbed the brick of the wall next to her to keep from falling. She shook her head at that and started to walk again, going over to her desk. But before she could get past the entrance to the room, a wave of dizziness went through her, and she knew something was seriously wrong as everything in front of her was spinning relentlessly. She heard a heavy sigh of air, and before she realized it was coming from her, her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and she collapsed to the startled yells of the officers that had been walking past her.</p>
      <p>In the break room Castle was almost finishing with Beckett's cup of coffee when Ryan came in and started to fill his mug. "Any new cases?" he asked.</p>
      <p>"No, which is great, I think we deserve a vacation after those last three," Ryan said, fixing his coffee.</p>
      <p>"I wish bro," Esposito said, coming into the room then and getting some coffee himself. "Where's Beckett? I thought we had to sign the papers for the last case."</p>
      <p>"She went to file the paperwork for the first case," Castle said, looking out at Beckett's desk and seeing she wasn't back. "She's taking her time I guess."</p>
      <p>It was then there were a couple of shouts outside, and the three men looked out to see a group of detectives and officers by the stairs.</p>
      <p>"What happened?" Ryan said as Esposito went out.</p>
      <p>"Someone just passed out," the detective called back into the break room. He spoke to a passing officer and then turned saying, "Shit, it's Beckett."</p>
      <p>At that, Castle dropped the mug of coffee he was holding and ran out of the room with Ryan following. He pushed through the people and saw that Esposito was right, it was Beckett and an officer with a first aid kit next to him was waving a packet underneath her nose. He kneeled down as she started to cough, opening her eyes and looking a little confused. "Kate, are you alright?" he asked apprehensively.</p>
      <p>"What? Yeah, I… what happened?" Beckett said, looking around and seeing people standing around her. She started to sit up, brushing off Castle's attempt to stop her.</p>
      <p>"You fell all of a sudden," Officer Hastings said. "Are you hurt?"</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said, looking down at her hands and moving her limbs slightly to see if she had any injuries.</p>
      <p>"Your head?" Castle asked as some people started to part in front of them.</p>
      <p>"No, it's fine," Beckett said before Captain Gates walked through the group to them.</p>
      <p>"What the hell is going on here?" Gates said.</p>
      <p>"Detective Beckett fainted sir," Hastings said quickly.</p>
      <p>"Is that right?" Gates asked, looking at the detective who Castle was helping to stand.</p>
      <p>"I'm assuming Sir, I don't remember what happened after coming down the stairs," Beckett said truthfully.</p>
      <p>"Alright, I think you need to head to the hospital Beckett, you do not look well," Gates said, studying her face.</p>
      <p>"Sir, I'm-" Becket began to say in protest.</p>
      <p>"No arguments Detective," Gates said. "Mr. Castle, can you take her to the hospital, drag her if you need to. I don't need one of my detectives collapsing on the job." When he started to open his mouth she quickly said, "I can make that an order."</p>
      <p>"Yes sir," Castle said. He followed Beckett as she walked through the space the crowd made for her, and glanced back, seeing that the people that had been standing around her were dispersing. They were alone so he quickly turned to his girlfriend and whispered, "You sure you're okay?"</p>
      <p>"Apparently not as much as I thought I was," Beckett said as she pressed the button for the elevator. "I feel fine now honestly."</p>
      <p>"Better you check," Castle said once they were in the car; alone; and heading down to the street level.</p>
      <p>"You really don't need to take me," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"What?" Castle said, half surprised by that statement.</p>
      <p>"It looked like you were going to say no to Gates," Beckett said, a little startled by his tone of voice.</p>
      <p>"Actually I was going to agree to what she said, she just interrupted me," Castle said. "But better she thought I was going to say that."</p>
      <p>"True," Beckett said with a slight nod. She sighed and rubbed her forehead saying, "I really don't need this now. What if I'm seriously ill? They might take Julia from me."</p>
      <p>"I don't think you're that sick, you definitely wouldn't be walking if that was the case," Castle said, trying to mask his own fear that she was right. "But we'll let the doctor check you out."</p>
      <p>Beckett merely nodded, her thoughts focusing on what was wrong with her health and why she had been dealing with fatigue and dizziness for the past few days. She couldn't fight her terror that she was sicker than she was trying to convince herself she was. And was terrified that she would lose custody of Julia if she seriously ill. She tried to fight that thought, but she couldn't stop it from resurfacing as Castle hailed a cab for them. She only hoped, as they were soon in the back of a taxi and headed for the hospital she and Julia went to, that it wasn't something she couldn't fight and that Julia would stay with her. She looked at Castle when he grabbed her hand, and she returned his brief smile before she leaned against him slightly, thinking to herself repeatedly that she was going to recover for her daughter's sake so she could reach the end of the six month probationary period and become Julia's mother fully. Knowing what she was working towards relieved her alarm slightly, and she felt determination set in, focusing on getting seeing her doctor out of the way to get to that afternoon when she could see her daughter again.</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Easier On You Now</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter is from the song One by U2, from their album Achtung Baby.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>Setting aside the magazine he'd been absently thumbing through for the past half hour as he sat in the waiting room of Beckett's doctor's office, Castle looked up at the door that she had been led into nearly an hour before. He let out a sigh, and took his phone out of his pocket, looking at the games on it before he picked Scrabble, starting to play. He was a little distracted though, glancing up instantly when the door opened. A man walked out though with a nurse, and he looked back down at his phone screen, wondering if Beckett was alright with how long the exam was taking. He jumped when his phone started to ring, and he saw it was Ryan, quickly answering it. "Do we have a case?" he asked as soon as he had it to his ear.</p>
      <p>"No, Espo and I are wondering if Beckett's finished with the doctor," Ryan said on the other end.</p>
      <p>"Oh, no, she's still inside," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"How long has she been in there?" Ryan asked in surprise.</p>
      <p>"Almost an hour," Castle said, checking his watch. "As soon as she's finished though I'm sure she'll head back to the Precinct."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, we just were wondering what was taking so long," Ryan said quickly. "Let her know we're going to take over the paperwork, we finished up the evidence forms for the cases and we don't really have anything else to do."</p>
      <p>"Thanks Ryan," Castle said before he hung up. He looked up at the door again when it opened, but a nurse came out calling a name into the waiting room. He put his phone away and picked up another magazine, taking a thicker National Geographic issue, hoping she would be quicker than it would take him to read each and every page.</p>
      <p>Inside the exam room she had been taken to, Beckett was looking out the window that was across from the examination table she was sitting on the edge of. Her doctor, after asking her about what she was going through health wise, told her she likely wasn't seriously ill, but she wanted a blood test done just in case. After three vials had been drawn, her doctor had then asked her about Julia and also her job and how things were going for her trying to balance the two at the same time. She had an idea after the doctor had left the room of what was wrong with her, but wanted to wait to hear it from the doctor herself before becoming too relieved.</p>
      <p>Dr. Özil walked in then and she smiled slightly saying, "I can ease your fears right now Kate," as she sat on a chair in front of the table, crossing her leg over the other. "You have no illnesses; you're in perfect health actually. So what you've been suffering with lately I'm going to diagnose as exhaustion."</p>
      <p>"Is me fainting earlier something I need to worry about?" Beckett said, immediately reassured.</p>
      <p>"Well, it's not something you want to happen," Dr. Özil said easily. "But if you continued as you are doing right now then it might develop into something worse. Now, you recently adopted a daughter, four years old and you're a detective. You told me you've just finished up three cases that were assigned you almost simultaneously, along with your daughter suffering from acute nightmares and needing your care. All of that is going to damage your sleep cycle and you obviously haven't been getting the rest that you need. Plus, you're on a probationary period concerning the adoption as well aren't you?"</p>
      <p>"For another three months," Beckett nodded.</p>
      <p>"And I'm guessing you've been stressing out about that as well?" Dr. Özil asked. When Beckett nodded she said, "And to add to that stress already, you're trying to get used to a child, without the benefit of maternity leave."</p>
      <p>"She's four though," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"It doesn't really matter," Dr. Özil pointed out. "You're suddenly a mother whether or not you gave birth to her or whatever her age is and you need to take on the task of caring for another human being."</p>
      <p>"So you're trying to point out to me that I took on too much at once," Beckett finally said when the doctor finished speaking and there was a silent pause.</p>
      <p>"A lot at once," Dr. Özil said. "Especially with your daughter needing so much care after the way she was raised as almost a recluse and then what happened to you both when you were kidnapped. Speaking of which, that still must be affecting you stress-wise, and all of that just built up until this morning when your body gave up trying to keep up with you."</p>
      <p>Sighing, Beckett said, "I can't quit my job and I can't give up my daughter."</p>
      <p>"I wouldn't suggest either," the doctor said. "But what I will suggest to your boss is that you take a two week leave to recover from this. And also to get situated fully with the way your life is now."</p>
      <p>Beckett was tempted to say a week would be long enough, but she still felt incredibly fatigued, and the idea of two weeks with Julia before her daughter needed to start kindergarten seemed like a wonderful idea. She finally nodded and said, "Two weeks will be nice."</p>
      <p>"And in that time I might suggest you go off the grid, meaning your Precinct can't get in touch with you," Dr. Özil said, standing as Beckett got off the examination table. "You need the least amount of stress or worry you can get."</p>
      <p>"Thank you doctor," Beckett said when they were at the door to the waiting room. "I just need a note-"</p>
      <p>"I'll give the Captain a call and let her know my diagnosis and prescription," Dr. Özil said as she opened the door and went out first. "And reiterate that you need to recover."</p>
      <p>"Thanks," Beckett said, shaking her hand. She smiled as the woman called to her to get rest, and she looked ahead of her at Castle, who was standing in front of the chair she'd left him sitting in. "I'm fine," she said quickly, seeing the question in his eyes. "Just exhaustion." She was a little startled when he suddenly hugged her for a moment and she embraced him back for a second before he pulled back.</p>
      <p>"I was getting worried it was worse than that," Castle said as they left the waiting room. "You were in there for a while."</p>
      <p>"My doctor did a blood test just to make sure," Beckett said. "Though she pretty much knew that it was exhaustion."</p>
      <p>"From what though?" Castle asked, pressing the button for the elevator.</p>
      <p>"From taking on my job and my daughter at the same time without having enough time to get myself used to everything. The three cases and then Julia's nightmares were the tipping point," Beckett said as they stepped inside the car.</p>
      <p>"You've had three months though with cases spaced pretty far apart," Castle said. "What's been keeping you from getting used to having a child?"</p>
      <p>Beckett hesitated but when she glanced up at him she saw that he looked concerned and she held up her finger to indicate she wanted him to wait. When they were off the elevator she led him in the opposite direction from the entrance, outside to where there was a little courtyard that was empty. "Okay, so you want to know my problem concerning Julia?" she asked. She wasn't surprised when he nodded and she said, "I've been trying for the past two months to get everything set for once she starts school."</p>
      <p>"But I thought you had her enrolled, a long time ago," Castle said, puzzled.</p>
      <p>"I'm talking about after school," Beckett said. "The school has daycare until 4 and from then to 5 she'll be in ballet class. But after? I've been scrambling to try and find a babysitter, but you know how Julia is still, she doesn't trust anyone completely but me. I've been lucky that she sort of trusts my neighbor down the hall, Mrs. Parker, but she's not very responsive. According to her, Julia barely talks to her once I drop her off at her place. I'm lucky that she still eats."</p>
      <p>"What if you had Julia taken care of by someone she knows and trusts?" Castle asked after she had finished, getting an idea suddenly.</p>
      <p>"Who? You know there's no one really," Beckett said. "I need her not to be afraid before I can take her home."</p>
      <p>"I've got a suggestion," Castle said. "Why don't we go back to the Precinct though, and you can get started on your vacation."</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said, though she wondered what he had come up with. She let him lead her back into the hospital, and they talked on the cab ride back to the Precinct about what she might do with Julia those two weeks. Once they had gotten off the elevator and were walking to Gates' office, she felt Castle slow down slightly behind her and she turned to him.</p>
      <p>"I don't think I need to go-" Castle started to say before Gates came out to the doorway of her office.</p>
      <p>"Detective Beckett, Mr. Castle, inside please," Gates said before she turned around.</p>
      <p>"I guess I was wrong," Castle said, looking slightly confused. He followed Beckett inside and closed the door as she walked to the Captain's desk.</p>
      <p>"I received a call from your doctor Beckett," Gates said. "And I did not realize you were struggling so much now that you have adopted Julia O'Malley."</p>
      <p>"It's not really struggling sir, just-" Beckett began quickly, not wanting to be viewed as unable to work and also be a mother.</p>
      <p>"I was also informed the past three cases, so close together were what brought you to what happened an hour ago out there," Gates interrupted as she held up her hand to stop Beckett. "It's been suggested, very insistently, that you be given a two week leave to recover from the exhaustion your doctor has diagnosed you with and I'm inclined to agree to that."</p>
      <p>"Thank you sir," Beckett said. "Now that I know, I will try my best not to let that happen again, my, my collapsing. But if any cases come in…"</p>
      <p>"Detectives Ryan and Esposito can handle them," Gates said. "I instructed them as to what I was told and your leave. I've also informed them that you will be going off the grid at your doctor's suggestion. Now you Mr. Castle, since Detective Beckett will not be here for any cases and I would prefer Ryan and Esposito to handle any future cases in the time she is not here on their own, I am putting you on a two week leave as well."</p>
      <p>"Sir, I can easily work with-" Castle said, trying to make his protest as convincing as he could. He was pleased with the two week leave being forced on him, as he had gotten an idea as Gates had been talking to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"A two week leave," Gates said shortly. "You're lucky I can't make it longer. Beckett, you can leave once you have the last of the paperwork for your case finished if it's not too much for you to do."</p>
      <p>"Yes sir," Beckett said before she turned to leave, walking past Castle. She tried not to walk too quickly as she knew he would catch up to her and she said as quietly as she could when she heard his footsteps close enough behind her, "Convincing."</p>
      <p>"Was it?" Castle asked as they walked to her desk.</p>
      <p>"Definitely," Beckett said as she sat down. "Where's the file?"</p>
      <p>"Right here," Ryan said, walking over with Esposito. "And we managed to get a pretty good chunk of it done."</p>
      <p>"Thanks," Beckett said gratefully. "Sorry to leave you guys on your own for two weeks."</p>
      <p>"We can handle it. But what was Gates talking about Castle being gone for two weeks?" Esposito asked.</p>
      <p>"That I'm going to be on leave for two weeks too, you heard her right," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Makes sense, any chance she can to get you out of here, even if it's temporary bro," Esposito said. "So how you feeling Beckett?"</p>
      <p>"I'm fine for now," Beckett replied, taking the file from Ryan and opening it to see where her colleagues had left off. She picked up her pen and then looked up at the three men standing around her desk. "Seriously guys, if I start feeling dizzy or lightheaded, I'll go home," she said as she saw they were watching her.</p>
      <p>"What are you going to do for two weeks?" Castle asked as he sat in the chair next to her desk.</p>
      <p>"I haven't thought about it, probably a mix of resting, spending that time with Julia and getting things settled before I come back," Beckett said absently. She heard the sound of keys and she looked up to see Castle taking a key off his key ring. "And this is?" she asked as she picked up the key he slid over to her.</p>
      <p>"You know I have a house in the Hamptons right?" Castle asked. When Beckett nodded he then said, "You can use it for the next two weeks, you'll definitely be going off the grid if you start by leaving the city."</p>
      <p>"With a four year old?" Beckett said, knowing already what he wanted by giving her the key.</p>
      <p>"I know Julia's not the destructive kind," Castle said. "She'll enjoy it, it's right on the beach and there's a pool."</p>
      <p>Sighing, Beckett took a little time to make it seem she was hesitating, and then said, "Okay, but if she breaks something…"</p>
      <p>"I doubt it," Castle said. "Enjoy it."</p>
      <p>"Nice of you to do man," Ryan said, seeming to be smirking. "What are you going to do for two weeks?"</p>
      <p>"I might go off the grid myself actually," Castle said. "Might check out the tables in Atlantic City… avoiding the Sapphire though of course."</p>
      <p>"Of course, good luck bro," Esposito said. "I need to get some financial evidence set."</p>
      <p>After Ryan had left, Beckett looked up at Castle, a smile playing at the corners of her lips but never forming fully before she went back to the papers in front of her. She turned her attention to finishing up the paperwork, wanting to be waiting for Julia to come out of the museum since she had the chance to do so, usually her daughter having to wait for her to pick her up. She only stopped for lunch when Castle almost forced her to, and when three fifteen rolled around she had him sign the last paper and she gave it to Ryan as he and Esposito had come over to her desk. She said a quick goodbye to them and wished them good luck on any future cases in the next two weeks before she packed her bag and left. She walked down the block until she reached the corner furthest from the Precinct before she stepped back against the building and watched the people going by. "You waited a while," she called as Castle walked to her.</p>
      <p>"Wanted to make sure they didn't suspect anything after giving you that key," Castle said. "You mind me tagging along to pick up Julia?"</p>
      <p>"Not at all," Beckett said with a smile. She hailed a cab and when they got in she closed the plastic divider between the front and back and turned to her boyfriend. "What's your plan exactly?"</p>
      <p>"I'll explain later okay?" Castle said simply. "But you don't mind this do you? Two weeks off?"</p>
      <p>"I'm looking forward to the time off, and it takes me right up to Julia's first day of school," Beckett said as the cab headed in the direction of 79th street. "But I still don't know how I'm going to work out what I'll do after she finishes her ballet classes."</p>
      <p>"After we pick her up, do you mind coming over to my place for dinner instead of your original plan?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"No, but I don't mind having it at my place," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"There's another reason I want to go to my loft," Castle said. "And once we get there I'll explain why."</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said, looking slightly confused. She didn't try to push him further on it and turned her attention to the streets, seeing where they had reached by that point. After another ten minutes, they pulled up against the curb and she quickly got out, checking her watch to see what time it was. "Oh, sorry," she said, turning as she realized she hadn't paid the cabbie but saw that the taxi was already driving away.</p>
      <p>"On me this time," Castle said simply. "She'll be out soon?"</p>
      <p>"At four," Beckett said, smiling at a woman walking up to the steps of the museum.</p>
      <p>"Kate, you're early today," the woman said. "Surprised to see you here."</p>
      <p>"I got a two week vacation suddenly today, decided to surprise Julia with it," Beckett said. "How's Celia doing Anita?"</p>
      <p>"Very good, she's nervous about the recital tomorrow, but I keep telling her she'll do great," Anita replied, glancing at Castle.</p>
      <p>"Oh, this is Richard Castle, he's a friend of mine and my co-worker," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"The novelist, that's right, and he knows Julia from work doesn't he?" Anita asked.</p>
      <p>"I do, and I have two weeks off too, thought I'd see Julia before I head out to Atlantic City," Castle answered as he shook the woman's hand.</p>
      <p>"How nice of you. I hope you have a great vacation, both of you. Excuse me, I want to be at the doors to get Celia, I promised her that I would take her home to practice right away," Anita said. "It was nice to meet you Mr. Castle. See you Kate."</p>
      <p>"She's the mother of Julia's friend in her ballet class," Beckett explained.</p>
      <p>"Nice to hear she made a friend," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Celia's kind of shy herself, so they seemed to hit it off right away. It's her first time in a dance class too," Beckett said, her eyes on the doors.</p>
      <p>"I keep forgetting to ask, how's Julia feeling about tomorrow?" Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Nervous," Beckett said. "I keep telling her she's great but…" she trailed off as she saw that a group of kids and some adults in light blue shirts were coming out then and she quickly spotted a little girl with reddish brown hair. "Julia," she called as she hurried up the steps.</p>
      <p>"Mommy!" Julia squealed as she saw her mother. She jumped up and down until Beckett reached her and wrapped her arms tightly around her neck once she had been picked up.</p>
      <p>"Did you have fun?" Beckett asked with a smile as she pulled back enough to look into her daughter's eyes.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, look what I got!" Julia said excitedly, holding up a toy horse.</p>
      <p>"Wow, that's so pretty, did you buy it?" Beckett said as she went down the stairs to Castle who was waiting on the sidewalk.</p>
      <p>"I did, Mrs. Baker said it was a And-a… losing horse," Julia said slowly, trying to pronounce the word.</p>
      <p>"Andalusian," Beckett corrected her gently. "And not a bad try sweetie, you got close. But it's cute; we'll need to put it in your room after we have dinner with Alexis, Martha and Castle." She wasn't surprised, when she stopped in front of him, that Julia suddenly wrapped her arms around her tightly and dropped the horse figurine.</p>
      <p>"Whoa, almost tested the theory that toy horses land on their feet," Castle said, just managing to catch it. He handed the toy to Beckett and watched as she whispered something to Julia.</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia whispered, glancing up at him quickly.</p>
      <p>"Should we go?" Castle said to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said with a sigh as she set Julia down and they waited for Castle to hail a cab. "Sweetie," she said. "I've got a surprise for you."</p>
      <p>"What is it?" Julia asked interestedly.</p>
      <p>"Tell her on the way," Castle said as a taxi stopped in front of him. He waited for Beckett and Julia get in before he followed and gave his address and then closed the plastic partition between the front and back.</p>
      <p>"Actually it's a surprise that both Castle and I have," Beckett said. "We're going to go up to a place called the Hamptons for two weeks. And Castle's letting us stay in his house with him."</p>
      <p>"What do we do there?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"My house is right on the ocean, and there's a swimming pool too," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I don't know how to swim," Julia said, looking up at Beckett.</p>
      <p>"We can teach you, remember I bought that vest for you to wear with your bathing suit," Beckett said. "And I'll take you to the beach too."</p>
      <p>"Like where we got our shells?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Kind of, that was Coney Island though, but there will be shells too," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Can we go now?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Tomorrow after your recital we'll go straight there," Beckett replied. "So tell us a little bit about the zoo, how that was."</p>
      <p>For the rest of the cab ride, Julia told her mother excitedly about the different animals and a little about the museum as well, sometimes merging the two places together. She seemed to quiet down a little around Castle as he tried to get involved in the conversation and asked her some questions. By the time they walked up to his door she was bouncing up and down while she held onto Beckett's hand tightly.</p>
      <p>"Easy Julia," Beckett said for the third time, a little more sternly. "I know you're excited, but you're going to tire yourself out and you won't be able to see Alexis." She was pleased when that worked, and Julia immediately calmed down as they walked into the loft after Castle.</p>
      <p>"Hello Julia, it's so wonderful to see you again," Martha said as the little girl rushed out of her mother's hold to the bottom of the stairs just as she was coming down. "Alexis is coming down right now. Beckett, how are you doing?" she asked as she kept a hold on Julia before she could go up the stairs.</p>
      <p>"I'm fine; I'm assuming he told you what happened?" Beckett asked as Castle helped her with her jacket.</p>
      <p>"He did, I had no idea you were working yourself so hard," Martha said.</p>
      <p>"I'm fine," Beckett said. "Two weeks will be more than enough for me to recover."</p>
      <p>"Feel up to some wine?" Castle asked as he walked over to the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"Yes, but not that much, I don't want to fall asleep over dinner," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Hi Julia," Alexis said, rushing down the stairs then. "How was the zoo today?"</p>
      <p>"Was fun," Julia said eagerly, hugging the young woman once she had reached her at the bottom of the stairs. "I saw the pretty stones and zebras."</p>
      <p>"Sounds fun," Alexis said. "Beckett," she called to the kitchen where her father was pouring out some wine. "Do you mind if I give this to her now?" she asked, holding up a box. "I got it for her while I was out in California."</p>
      <p>"Go ahead," Beckett said, walking over to the couch with Castle where they sat as Alexis helped Julia open the box. "You really didn't have to get her anything though."</p>
      <p>"Once you see this you'll understand why I bought it," Alexis said as she pulled a figurine out of the box.</p>
      <p>"Stitch!" Julia gasped as she saw the alien. "He's stepping on the bridge," she giggled happily. "Thank you," she said earnestly to Alexis. "Mommy, see?" she asked as she ran over to Beckett, showing her the figurine with the recognizable towers of the Golden Gate Bridge on it.</p>
      <p>"That was so sweet of you Alexis," Beckett said, letting Castle hold the statue after she had looked at it.</p>
      <p>"So," Castle said as he handed it to Alexis who sat on the other end of the couch with Julia, looking closer at the figurine. "There's a reason I changed our plans for tonight Kate."</p>
      <p>"Yes, I'm waiting to hear why," Beckett said simply, watching him.</p>
      <p>"You said you were having some trouble finding someone Julia would be comfortable enough with to watch her after ballet practice until you can go home," Castle said. "And I thought if maybe she's with people she trusts from the past, she might do a lot better than she has lately with your neighbor."</p>
      <p>"You asked your mother-" Beckett said, knowing then why Martha and most likely Alexis already knew she had fainted that day.</p>
      <p>"Actually I suggested it," Martha said simply. "He didn't have the courage to ask me."</p>
      <p>"Or was I leading you to that point where you volunteered?" Castle said, his eyebrows raised, earning him a slight giggle from Julia.</p>
      <p>"Still, that's too much to ask of you, both of you," Beckett said, looking from Martha to Alexis. "It was great you did that when we were still working on the case three months ago, but to take care of her on a more permanent basis… I can't do that to you."</p>
      <p>"Really, we wouldn't mind it," Martha said. "Julia is a wonderful child, and it would only be for a few hours or so."</p>
      <p>"That would depend on the case I'm working on at the time," Beckett said doubtfully. "And it's at night too, if you have a dinner or you just want to go out, you too Alexis. And if you have a night class-"</p>
      <p>"Actually I'm not taking night classes anymore, it got to be too much," Alexis cut in then, looking up from the toy horse Julia was showing her. "And really, I wouldn't mind babysitting; it'd be fun, like it was back in April."</p>
      <p>"Why don't you have a trial period," Castle said. "Two weeks, and if Julia's doing well you can decide then for sure."</p>
      <p>"Alright," Beckett said slowly. "But if it's too hard for you then please tell me and I can try and find a nanny again."</p>
      <p>"Do you have someone to take care of her those cases we get late at night or early in the morning?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I just call Mrs. Parker over," Beckett said. "But I hate doing that because again, it's asking a lot."</p>
      <p>"Does she mind?" Martha asked.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett replied, looking confused. "I think she likes looking after Julia because she always talks about how she wishes she could have had grandchildren of her own."</p>
      <p>"Does she have a husband?" Alexis asked.</p>
      <p>"She's a widow," Beckett said. "Okay, so I'll agree to two weeks, but I feel like I should pay you something for that, you'll be caring for my daughter and also feeding her. I have to recompense you and I'm not going to be dissuaded."</p>
      <p>"Which doesn't surprise me," Martha said. "We'll talk about that later once we get closer to the trial period. For now, what will you be doing on your two week vacation?" she said as she waved her hand in the air in a dismissive gesture.</p>
      <p>"Castle invited us to the Hamptons, you didn't tell them?" Beckett asked, reaching into her pocket. She was surprised when he shook his head and then pulled out a key. "I think this goes back to you since I don't really have any use for it."</p>
      <p>"Why'd you give her the key?" Alexis asked.</p>
      <p>"Oh, to fool Ryan and Esposito. How shady Richard," Martha said.</p>
      <p>"I had to make sure they thought we'd be separated during our leave," Castle said. "Said I was heading down to Atlantic City."</p>
      <p>"Good idea," Martha said as there was a knock on the door. "That would be dinner, excuse me."</p>
      <p>"Thank you for talking with them," Beckett said quietly as Alexis took Julia over to the table to help her set it. "I just wish I could have hired a nanny."</p>
      <p>"I think my mother will enjoy taking care of Julia," Castle said, glancing over at the kitchen where Martha was directing the delivery man to set out the containers in his case. "With Alexis in college and me gone a lot… can get pretty lonely here."</p>
      <p>"Is that her talking… or you?" Beckett asked with a smile.</p>
      <p>"Okay, part of me but I think that's how she feels too," Castle said. He smiled when Beckett smirked before taking a sip of wine and he glanced at Julia and Alexis. "Would you mind if I told them to come for the second week?"</p>
      <p>"It's your house Castle," Beckett pointed out. When he just looked at her she sighed and said, "No, I don't mind, actually, Julia would probably like Alexis being there too."</p>
      <p>"Dinner is ready, come and get your plates, Julia, you're first tonight," Martha said.</p>
      <p>"What is it?" Julia asked, trying to jump and see the food.</p>
      <p>"Here, let me-" Castle said, trying to pick her up. He was a little hurt when she backed up into her mother and grabbed her hand.</p>
      <p>'<em>Sorry</em>,' Beckett mouthed to him before she picked up Julia and let her see the food, which were different Greek dishes. She was relieved when he nodded to her and she glanced down at her daughter as Alexis helped put a gyro on Julia's plate. Though she had been trying hard the last three months to try and get Julia to accept Castle, it seemed she was retaining her fear of men. She hoped that two weeks in his house would help her daughter trust him a little more, and she also hoped that he wasn't getting frustrated by the way Julia was acting around him so often.</p>
      <p>Sitting down at the table, Castle waited after a while until they had eaten before he brought up his invitation for his mother and daughter to join him, Beckett and Julia at the Hamptons for the last week of their visit there.</p>
      <p>"Not a week," Martha said quickly. "Five days is long enough."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I have some stuff I need to get ready before school starts, by then I'll be ready to go," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Are you sure, because you can stay longer," Castle said, a little surprised that they weren't accepting the full week.</p>
      <p>"It's fine Dad," Alexis replied. "And speaking of school, I'm sorry I can't go to the recital tomorrow Beckett, turns out the professor of my Psych Lab is having a luncheon for the class I'm taking tomorrow afternoon and I have to be there since it's a kind of intro to what we'll be doing for the semester."</p>
      <p>"That's okay," Beckett said. "Your grandmother already explained to me why you weren't going to be able to go when she told me about the rehearsal she's going to."</p>
      <p>"I don't know why I need to go," Martha said, rolling her eyes slightly. "She's a perfectly good actress, but she's worried about her Southern accent, so she invited me and the director is a fan… so I don't have much choice."</p>
      <p>"I'll be taking pictures," Beckett said with a reassuring smile. "I'll send them to you Alexis."</p>
      <p>"I can't wait to see them," Alexis said. "Aren't you excited Julia?"</p>
      <p>Julia's cheeks turned red a little and she looked down at her plate, pushing some rice on her plate around before her mother told her gently to eat. She nodded finally and said, "I get to wear a costume."</p>
      <p>"How wonderful, and what is your costume?" Martha said.</p>
      <p>"It's blue, I'm a winter," Julia said happily.</p>
      <p>"Well with her coloring-" Castle started to say.</p>
      <p>"She means snowflake," Beckett said, shaking her head. "The theme of the recital is winter. She's going to have a little solo too."</p>
      <p>"You are? You didn't say that before," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"The best dancer in her class she gets to do a little dancing on her own," Beckett said, unable to keep the pride from her voice. "She showed me a little of it and she looks great."</p>
      <p>"Can we see some too?" Alexis asked.</p>
      <p>"Maybe once the recital is over," Beckett said when Julia shook her head no furiously. "So what classes do you have for this semester besides the Psych Lab?" she asked Alexis then to get the focus off her daughter who she knew was getting very uncomfortable.</p>
      <p>A little while later when they finished eating, Julia was sitting with Beckett on the couch and looking at her figurine and toy horse. "Mommy," she asked. "Where's Castle's house?"</p>
      <p>"In the Hamptons," Beckett said. "Why?"</p>
      <p>"Do we take a taxi?" Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Actually you get to go in my car," Castle said, coming over and giving a mug of coffee to Beckett. "Can she have some hot chocolate or is it too late?"</p>
      <p>"No, I just remembered, I have to get a car seat for her," Beckett said. "Or else we will need a cab. Plus I should start packing so we can leave after the recital. Thank you for the coffee though. Martha, Alexis, thank you for having us over and the dinner."</p>
      <p>"It was great to see Julia again," Alexis said. "We'll see you in a week," she said to the little girl who hurried over to her before hugging her tightly.</p>
      <p>"So what time is the recital tomorrow?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"At ten," Beckett said, taking Julia's hand after she had said goodbye to Alexis and Martha herself. "Should only be a half hour," she said.</p>
      <p>"I'm eager to see her dance," Castle said, smiling down at Julia who looked up at him with wide eyes. "I'll meet you at the school. Can I give you a call later?"</p>
      <p>"Sure, but after she goes to bed," Beckett said, nodding down to the little girl who was watching them. "I'll see you in a week Alexis, Martha. Bye," she called to the two before she stepped out into the hall with Castle following her and Julia. "I'll see you tomorrow," she said to him as he stood in his doorway.</p>
      <p>"See you tomorrow," Castle said before he and Beckett exchanged a kiss. He pulled away and watched the two walk down the hall, Julia skipping to keep up with her mother. He sighed slightly and went back into his loft, seeing that Alexis was leaning over the railing on the stairs. "You're spying on us? How much like your father you've become," he teased her, lowering his voice slightly.</p>
      <p>"You think Julia will ever accept you?" Alexis asked, putting her cheek on her fist.</p>
      <p>"That's a great question, and only Julia can answer that," Castle said. "But I'm hoping that maybe this trip will help her realize I'm not going to hurt her."</p>
      <p>"She has to realize you're pretty important in Beckett's life," Martha said, going up the stairs then. "She has been around you two; it would be hard not to see, even for a child that age."</p>
      <p>"Julia's pretty perceptive," Alexis said. "Maybe because she spent the first four years of her life inside and only saw the world from windows. But I'm sure spending more time than just a couple hours with them will help her Dad. I hope so too."</p>
      <p>"Really?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, you're part of Beckett's life, Julia is too," Alexis said. "It's has to be tough on Beckett her daughter isn't really a fan of yours at the moment."</p>
      <p>"Are you sure you need to take that Psych Lab? Sounds like you have it pretty much down," Castle said, squeezing his daughter's shoulder.</p>
      <p>"Good night Dad, I'll see you in the morning," Alexis said with a smile.</p>
      <p>"Night," Castle said before she started up the stairs. He watched her go and then went over to his office, closing the door behind her. Sitting at his desk he set his phone down next to his laptop and checked the time. "Two more hours," he said in slight frustration. Shaking his head, he quickly went onto the internet, looking up the official site for the Hamptons, seeing if there were any events that Julia might enjoy, getting a few phone numbers as well.</p>
      <p>After a while he shut off the internet and opened his latest Nikki Heat novel he was writing, reading through the last paragraph he'd written. He sat up and set his fingertips on the keys, but nothing came to mind. He gave up and opened the poker game he'd downloaded onto the laptop and played trying to keep his eyes from the clock in the bottom corner. It didn't work though, and he finally gave up the pretense of not letting his gaze drag downwards. He saw finally that it was past eight, and he hurriedly picked up his phone, shutting the top of his computer, his finger automatically dialing Beckett's number as he sat back in his chair.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Okay, sweetie, another ten pages and then to sleep," Beckett was saying to Julia at a quarter to eight. "You definitely need your rest today."<br/>"I don't wanna read Mommy," Julia said as she climbed onto Beckett's lap.</p>
      <p>"Do you want to go straight to bed?" Beckett said, pretending to be hopeful. She laughed softly when Julia shook her head no frantically and she kissed her forehead. "I tried. So what do you want to do?"</p>
      <p>"Is…" Julia then began. She bit her lower lip a few times and then closed her mouth, grabbing a strand of Beckett's hair that was over her shoulder, tangling her fingers around it.</p>
      <p>"Tell me sweetie," Beckett said gently, knowing the girl was very nervous. She wasn't surprised when Julia didn't respond, and she gently stroked her hair, kissing the top of her head.</p>
      <p>"Is Castle going to be there while we are at the house?" Julia said, the words almost exploding out of her.</p>
      <p>"Well, it is his home, so yes he will be," Beckett said lightly. "Do you not like him Julia?" she asked, tilting her head up towards her.</p>
      <p>Julia's eyes filled with tears and she said, "I'm still scared Mommy."</p>
      <p>"I know, I know, but I told you that he's not a bad man," Beckett said as Julia pressed her cheek to her shoulder. "He's the one who found us remember? And he's Alexis' dad too, so he can't be bad, she loves him very much you know."</p>
      <p>"Do you… like him Mommy?" Julia then asked shyly, grabbing some of her mother's hair again.</p>
      <p>"I do," Beckett said, trying not to hesitate too much. She had never really explained hers and Castle's relationship to her daughter, not sure if Julia would tell someone accidentally that would tell Gates. She wasn't surprised Julia had picked up on their relationship though; they never tried to hide it from her, as she wanted her daughter to have an idea of what a normal relationship was since she had never had parents who were married or in love to see what that was like.</p>
      <p>"A lot?" Julia asked, starting to tangle the strand of Beckett's hair around her fingers.</p>
      <p>"Yes," Beckett said simply before gently taking her hair out of Julia's hand. "And you know that I hope maybe one day you can trust him as much as I do. He's saved my life before."</p>
      <p>"He did?" Julia asked, her eyes wide.</p>
      <p>"Ask him, he'll tell you every time because he likes to keep score, how many times he's saved me and how many times I've saved his life," Beckett said, smiling when Julia giggled.</p>
      <p>"Why does he do that?" she asked.</p>
      <p>"Because that's just the way he is," Beckett answered. "He can be kind of funny like that."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, he makes me laugh sometimes," Julia said softly.</p>
      <p>"You don't need to like him Julia," Beckett then said, stroking her hair. "I just don't want you to be afraid of him. He would never hurt you."</p>
      <p>"Not you right?" Julia said anxiously.</p>
      <p>"Does that scare you too?" Beckett asked, slightly surprised. But she knew that was also stemming from what her birth mother had raised her to believe about men in general. She also realized too that since Julia knew that she and Castle were in love, the thought of him hurting her in any way was very upsetting to the little girl. She sighed when Julia nodded and said, "Well, you should know he never really would, but you should ask him about that too. He'd say the same thing."</p>
      <p>"Okay," Julia said softly.</p>
      <p>"Sweetie," Beckett then said. "I don't want you to like him because I do. I just want you to be able to trust him as much as me." She sighed when Julia pressed herself closer against her side and she kissed the top of her head softly. "Just remember he's going to be there for the next two weeks with us."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia whispered.</p>
      <p>"Alright, it's past time for you to be in bed," Beckett said, standing up then before she held up the bed sheet for Julia to slide under. "I love you and see you tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"Mommy, can't I practice more?" Julia asked plaintively.</p>
      <p>"Uh-uh sweetie, time for sleep or else you'll fall asleep right as you're getting into the second position tomorrow at the recital," Beckett said teasingly. She smiled when Julia giggled and she bent over, kissing her forehead. "Sweet dreams."</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia said after she and Beckett shared a kiss goodnight.</p>
      <p>"Yes, and you really need to sleep," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Castle is coming to see me dance?" Julia asked. When her mother nodded she squeezed the bed sheets in her hand and said, "Did he want to or did you tell him?"</p>
      <p>"He asked if he could come," Beckett said. She smiled when Julia looked amazed and said, "I'm not kidding Julia, he wanted to see you dance tomorrow, he asked me when I told him about the recital." She kissed her daughter on the forehead again and then said, "Now sleep sweetie. Goodnight." She walked over to the door and looked back to check on the little girl, who was holding her Stitch doll close to her as she wriggled down under the covers. She closed the light and then closed the door before she turned and went to her room. She closed her door as well, and then quickly grabbed one of her suitcases.</p>
      <p>Beckett was just putting a sundress into the suitcase a few minutes later when her cell phone rang and she answered it without looking at the number. "You don't waste much time do you?" she teased.</p>
      <p>"We had a busy day, we didn't get to talk much," Castle said, pretending to be defensive. "You want me to I'll hang up."</p>
      <p>"I'll talk, but you're going on speakerphone right now, you interrupted my packing," Beckett said before she pressed the button and set the phone next to her suitcase.</p>
      <p>"Too bad I couldn't be there to watch," Castle said, leaning on his elbows on the desk.</p>
      <p>"Clothes, Castle, nothing that would excite you," Beckett said, smiling as she rolled her eyes.</p>
      <p>"You have some really nice outfits," Castle shot back.</p>
      <p>"Yes, well, I don't need an audience for this," Beckett said. "I just want to pack and then get some sleep so I'm not exhausted for the recital tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"How's Julia doing?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"She's a little nervous still, but it was bedtime and she was very sleepy," Beckett said as she folded a shawl and put it with the sundress. "She did ask if she could practice a little before I left the room, but I put my foot down."</p>
      <p>"So, Kate," Castle said then. "You know how Julia's still a little…"</p>
      <p>"Wary of you? I know, I've tried to talk to her about that, actually we talked about you tonight instead of reading her book," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"And any sign she's loosening up where I'm concerned?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I don't think so," Beckett sighed. "I really wish she wouldn't do that with you; as scared as she is; but her mother was so… protective I'm afraid it might ruin her mentally as she gets older."</p>
      <p>"I don't really mind so much she's acting like that first," Castle said, hurrying to reassure her. "I know it's what she was raised to think. And second, I don't spend too much time around her, so what reason does she have to put any kind of trust in me?"</p>
      <p>"I was hoping because I trust you, but you're right, when you do spend time with us, it's usually for a night or a meal," Beckett said. "That was one reason I was looking forward to this weekend and spending Sunday at the museum. But this trip will work out even better. Just, please don't do anything that might make her withdrawn again."</p>
      <p>"I'll be on my best behavior," Castle said. "Scout's honor… which I'm doing right now, you just can't see."</p>
      <p>"I'll take your word for it," Beckett said, talking a little loudly as she walked over to her closet and pulled out a few items. "You know, she asked me before I left her room, if you asked to go to the recital tomorrow or if I'd asked you to do that."</p>
      <p>"What was her reaction when you told her the former?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"It made her think, which is interesting to see in a four year old child," Beckett said. "But I think my daughter's older than her years." She sighed and said, "Which frustrates me like crazy. I don't hate her mother, but what she did to Julia without thinking, sheltering her, teaching her no man was trustworthy…"</p>
      <p>"You're doing a pretty good job so far trying to undo all that," Castle pointed out. "In three months she's not hiding from women as well as men, so that's a step forward."</p>
      <p>"A baby step forward," Beckett said. "But I'll take what I can get." She smiled and said, "Thank you for noticing that."</p>
      <p>"Hard not to, especially since Alexis said that she doesn't hide when you knock on the door anymore," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, that was really nice," Beckett said. "That took a long time to break her from doing." They were both quiet for a while before she said, "Are you packed yet?"</p>
      <p>"Why do you want to know?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Just filling in the silence," Beckett said with a smile, sitting on the bed next to the suitcase. "So is the house ready for us?"</p>
      <p>"It is, and I looked into some things to do with Julia," Castle said. "Not much, up there this time of year it's all about the beach. It'll be interesting to see how she reacts to it; you've never taken her swimming have you?"</p>
      <p>"Never got the chance. I did take her walking on the beach at Coney Island, she really enjoyed that," Beckett said. She heard him start to speak, but then quickly stopped and she said, "Are you trying to ask about that stick man?"</p>
      <p>"Yes, but I'm not sure if you'll be angry about that," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I'm not, it's a reasonable question," Beckett said, sliding to her headboard to lean against it. "We actually picked up some sand and some shells, and put it into the bowl that's on the table."</p>
      <p>"Oh, that bowl, I wondered where you got that," Castle said. "A more positive memory?"</p>
      <p>"A lot more," Beckett said. She smiled and said, "While we were getting her car seat Julia asked about getting more shells for it. Hampton shells, as she put it."</p>
      <p>"There are some nice shells up there, pretty ones," Castle said. "I should tell her tomorrow, well, I should just show her really. Maybe I could look with her."</p>
      <p>"That would be a good idea," Beckett said. "But I think we should ease her into being alone with you."</p>
      <p>"Of course, I'm not going to rush into it," Castle said. "Which means she takes after you Detective Beckett."</p>
      <p>"To a point, yes, but I'm sure she'll warm up to you faster than I realized I loved you," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Speaking of which," Castle said, a smile spreading across his face. "What're you wearing right now?"</p>
      <p>"What if I said absolutely nothing?" Beckett said, smiling as well.</p>
      <p>"Then I'd throw down the phone and get over there," Castle replied. "But I know you're probably too tired, so I'll save it for the beach house. Speaking of which, you are going to have a bathing suit with you right?"</p>
      <p>"I already packed it. And before you say a word about it, I am not going to be skinny dipping, not with Julia there," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"I tried," Castle said. "Okay, so I'll meet you at the school, make sure to save a seat for me," he said as he knew he needed to let her get some rest.</p>
      <p>"Right, and we'll have everything ready to go for after the recital," Beckett said. "See you tomorrow Castle."</p>
      <p>"Night Kate," Castle said before he hung up. He sighed and went out to his room, getting his own suitcase, thinking of what he could do with Julia that vacation, hoping that something would work and he could somehow get his girlfriend's daughter to look at him with something other than fear for longer than a few minutes. He was looking forward to the trip though, wondering what it was going to be like spending time with Beckett and Julia together, almost like a family he thought with a slight smile on his face.</p>
      <p>After hanging up her phone, Beckett hurriedly finished packing her suitcase which she took out to the entry, setting it next to Julia's light blue floral print suitcase and the chair her new car seat was on. She couldn't help smiling to herself as she realized that the trip was going to be very important for herself, Julia and Castle. It was going to let them know if Julia could accept Castle as part of her mother's life and therefore her own, and also testing if the three of them could get along as a family; though she was hesitant to use that word for the time being. She went to Julia's room then, to check on her, and saw that the little girl was fast asleep. Noticing her Stitch doll on the ground, she walked inside quietly and picked it up, tucking it next to Julia. She smiled and then kissed her daughter's forehead before she left, standing in the doorway for a moment before she finally forced herself to leave, and felt a kind of excitement, finally able to spend time with Julia as any mother would with her daughter. She went back to her room, ready to get some rest and reach the next day when her leave would begin.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Spinning, Laughing, Dancing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter is from the song Seven Years, which was written by Lee Alexander and sung by Norah Jones, from her album Come Away with Me.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>"Good morning Julia," the woman standing just beyond the doorway said as Beckett hurried into the room behind the auditorium stage with Julia leading her. "Ms. Beckett."</p>
      <p>"Good morning Madame Claude," Julia said nervously, her voice shaking. "I'm not late am I?" she asked her mother, looking up at her.</p>
      <p>"No, we're here in time, you have another twenty minutes to go," Beckett said reassuringly to her. "Good morning," she said to the ballet teacher. "Where can I help her into her costume?"</p>
      <p>"Just chose a chair and 'elp 'er with 'er things there," the teacher said, her French accent thick. "I will come to get you when it is time to perform."</p>
      <p>"Okay sweetie," Beckett said once they had found a chair and she set the girl's ballet bag on it. "Let's hurry and get you ready." She kissed Julia's cheek as she helped her step out of the skirt that she had been wearing over her pale blue leotard and white tights and said, "Your hands are freezing," in slight surprise as she felt them.</p>
      <p>"I'm scared," Julia said, shivering a little.</p>
      <p>"It's okay," Beckett said, hugging her tightly. She rubbed the little girl's back and said, "You know my first day as a police officer, I was scared. My first day as a detective too."</p>
      <p>"You were?" Julia asked in slight shock.</p>
      <p>"I was," Beckett said, nodding her head slightly as she took out Julia's ballet shoes from the bag and then her costume. "I was afraid of doing something wrong and then losing my job, which I didn't want to happen."</p>
      <p>"What did you do?" Julia said as she let her mother put her on the chair and helped her slip on her ballet shoes.</p>
      <p>"I thought about what I needed to do, and remembered that I was there to help people," Beckett said. "And I think you should do the same thing. You're here to dance because you love to do it right?" When Julia nodded quickly she smiled and said, "Then think about that, you love to dance, and now you have a chance to share with me how happy you are when you dance."</p>
      <p>"What if I make a mistake?" Julia asked as she raised her arms over her head so Beckett could put her costume on for her. "I tried to practice a lot."</p>
      <p>"You did, and it's okay if you make a mistake, because no one is perfect. I make little mistakes too," Beckett said, gently pulling down the skirt of the gauzy dress, trying to straighten the uneven edges as best she could. "So don't worry, this is for fun, and I'm so glad I get to see you dance Julia, I don't care if you mess up at all, I just want to see you happy too." She smiled when Julia threw herself at her and she knelt down so she could hug her daughter tightly. She kissed her forehead tenderly before they shared a kiss and then stood up. "Ready for your hair and makeup?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said eagerly. She took Beckett's hand and let her lead her over to where some women were fixing up a few other dancers' hair and putting on some blue glitter on their faces. She went to one woman she recognized as her teacher's assistant and sat on the chair in front of her, smiling at her mother in the mirror in front of her as Beckett was standing behind her.</p>
      <p>"Are you nervous at all Julia?" the assistant asked as she quickly pulled Julia's reddish brown hair into a bun. "Don't worry," she when the little girl nodded slightly. "I remember my first recital, I was super scared, but it turned out pretty well. Just listen to the music and let it take over you like it does during class and you'll do great."</p>
      <p>"See sweetie? It's normal but you'll do fine," Beckett said, putting her hand on Julia's shoulder as she leaned over her. "Give me a kiss before she puts that glitter all over your face."</p>
      <p>Julia giggled and after they had shared a kiss asked Beckett, "You don't want glitter on your face?"</p>
      <p>"That's alright," Beckett said, squeezing her shoulder lightly. "I'll let you wear it today." She stepped back and let the assistant place the glitter around Julia's face and then stick a few rhinestones on her forehead.</p>
      <p>"Okay, you're all set, and just in time you go on in about ten minutes," the assistant said as she helped Julia down. "I'll see you in the wings with the other girls."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said, taking Julia's hand. "Let me get a picture of you for your grandfather," she said, taking her camera out of her purse. She directed her daughter to pose, and wasn't surprised when Julia put her feet in the first position, her hands clasped demurely. She had a lot of pictures of her daughter like that, and knew it was partially what was comfortable for her and part a protective stance for her. "Okay, I better go and get seats before the good ones are taken," she said. "Break a leg Julia," she said, hugging her carefully.</p>
      <p>"Thank you Mommy, you'll watch the whole show right?" Julia asked nervously.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said firmly. "I won't move a muscle until you and your classmates walk off the stage at the end." She kissed the side of her head and said, "I can't wait to see you sweetie." She gave Julia another hug and then saw that her friend Celia was running to her. "Someone wants to talk to you I think," she said, turning her daughter towards her friend. "Break a leg you two," she said, smiling at the girls as they grabbed hands and jumped up and down a little, chattering already about their costumes. She finally forced herself to leave backstage, and went to the auditorium. She looked around in slight surprise at how large it was, but reminded herself the school went all the way to grade 12, and it wasn't a public school either.</p>
      <p>Beckett found two seats in the third row, in the middle, and sat down, nodding to Celia's parents who were to her right in the front row. She looked back at the entrance, to see if Castle was there yet, but didn't spot him. She sighed slightly and looked at her camera, checking to make sure her picture of Julia had come out.</p>
      <p>"You're Kate right?" a voice said suddenly to her left, making her look up.</p>
      <p>"Yes," Beckett said slowly, looking at the man who was standing next to her.</p>
      <p>"I'm David Phillips, I'm Celia's uncle," the man said, holding his hand out. "Is this seat taken?"</p>
      <p>"I think it is," a voice said behind the man suddenly, making him turn.</p>
      <p>"Castle, you made it in time," Beckett said, smiling at him. "And yes, this seat is taken, but it was nice to meet you Mr. Phillips, you have a wonderful niece."</p>
      <p>"That happen much?" Castle asked as he sat down in the seat next to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Not as much as I thought it would," Beckett replied. "There have been a couple divorced fathers who've talked to me, tried to see if I was interested."</p>
      <p>"No other uncles?" Castle said. When Beckett shook her head he asked, "How's she doing?"</p>
      <p>"Really nervous, but I talked to her the best I could," Beckett said. "But actually putting on her costume calmed her a little. Well, getting her shoes on really helped."</p>
      <p>"You take a picture of her?" Castle asked, nodding to her camera in her hand.</p>
      <p>"I did, for my dad," Beckett said, handing him the camera.</p>
      <p>"She looks cute," Castle said with a smile. "You've got to send this to Alexis and my mother, they'll love seeing it. I bet you my mother's going to say she's got the potential to be an actress."</p>
      <p>"I know, Julia's teacher told her on her first day of class that being a dancer was acting out the story of the music or song," Beckett said, slightly mimicking the teacher's French accent towards the end.</p>
      <p>"So she's French I'll guess?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Very, you hear her talk it's as if she's just landed at JFK," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"So where is your dad?" Castle asked as more people came into the auditorium.</p>
      <p>"DC," Beckett said. "A forum for his firm and about twenty others around the country, he'll come back on the twenty-second."</p>
      <p>"Did you tell him what happened yesterday?" Castle whispered as there were people on either side of them.</p>
      <p>"Sort of," Beckett said. "I didn't really tell him I fainted, just said that I took two weeks off to get things set with Julia, and for us to have a vacation too."</p>
      <p>Castle wanted to comment on that, but the lights dimmed and the doors in the back were shut. "Almost forgot," he said, suddenly remembering. He took something out of his jacket pocket and showed it to Beckett. "Video camera, Alexis made sure I brought this with me," he told her.</p>
      <p>"They want to see Julia?" Beckett asked with a smile.</p>
      <p>"Yep, so I need to head back home really fast before I come pick you up," Castle said before Julia's ballet teacher walked out onto the stage.</p>
      <p>After a brief introduction was given about the recital, how it was more an exhibition of what the girls in the class had learned since they had first started, Madame Claude then said, "And we will have two solo performances by Celia Phillips and Julia Beckett to show what the girls will be learning as they continue their lessons into the next level."</p>
      <p>"Wow, you didn't mention her friend performing too," Castle whispered to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"I didn't know she would be, Julia didn't tell me," Beckett said back. "Probably because she's been so nervous about her own performance," she said with a smile as the twenty girls in the class filed out from both sides of the stage. She quickly got her camera ready as next to her Castle began to film with his camera. She spotted Julia almost at the end of the right line and smiled to see her walking with her toes pointed, as she normally did in her ballet slippers.</p>
      <p>"She looks like a ballet dancer," Castle said, looking at Beckett and seeing the proud expression on her face.</p>
      <p>"I know, I'll have to tell her after this," Beckett replied quickly before music started to play.</p>
      <p>The recital began then with Madame Claude and her assistant leading the girls through their moves, which were very basic as the youngest girls were four and the oldest six. They danced to another song before the assistant took one group of girls and led them in a dance together; which included Julia. The teacher took the other group and danced with them to another song before they left the stage, leaving her alone. She then called Julia and Celia out onto the stage, and started to speak.</p>
      <p>After having the two little girls do a few more steps, for the next level of the ballet class, the ballet teacher had Celia dance her solo first. After she had finished, Madame Claude introduced Julia and Beckett and Castle clapped as loudly as they could as the teacher explained the song she would be dancing to.</p>
      <p>"She looks so scared," Beckett whispered to Castle as she grabbed his arm.</p>
      <p>"She'll be okay, she's done a great job so far," he said, squeezing her hand. He let her go as she slid her hand from him to start taking pictures as Julia had begun to dance.</p>
      <p>Julia danced, only making a slight mistake in her timing, and once she stopped she looked into the audience and could see her mother clapping. She bowed quickly as she had been taught and then walked off the stage to the sound of applauding.</p>
      <p>"Okay, so I guess I can relax until her next recital," Beckett said, breathing out in relief as the lights came up and people started to get up to leave or pick up their child.</p>
      <p>"She's really good," Castle said as they stood. "Think she'll want to be a pro?"</p>
      <p>"At the moment she does," Beckett said, stopping in the aisle as she heard her name called. "Anita, Celia did a great job today," she said to the woman who was approaching her with her husband and brother in law. Her smile faltered at the sight of the latter, but she turned back to the woman as she was speaking to her.</p>
      <p>"And Julia did wonderful herself," Anita said. "We're going to pick Celia up backstage. But I just wanted to see if you were as nervous about your daughter as I was about mine."</p>
      <p>"Very," Beckett said. "I'll see you and Celia once classes start again."</p>
      <p>"Right, enjoy your vacation," Anita said before she ushered her husband to the stage.</p>
      <p>"So I forgot to tell you about the house, you need to…" Castle started to say quickly to Beckett when the brother in law started to try and speak to her. He trailed off when the man turned and followed his brother and he turned to look at his girlfriend. "Little aggressive," he said simply.</p>
      <p>"I could have handled him," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Oh I know, but I wanted the chance to keep him from talking. Voice had a nasal tone to it, very irritating," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"There she is," Beckett said suddenly as she saw Julia hurry out from the left side of the stage. She hurried over to the steps before her daughter could run down them, and picked her up, hugging her tightly. "Oh sweetie you did so well, I knew you would," she said, kissing Julia's cheek; the blue glitter and rhinestones gone from her face.</p>
      <p>"I only made a little mistake," Julia said happily. "Madame Claude said me and Celia did really good."</p>
      <p>"You did, it was perfect I thought," Beckett said. "A lot better than I could do."</p>
      <p>"Thank you Mommy," Julia said, hugging her again.</p>
      <p>"That was really good," Castle said quickly when Julia looked over her mother's shoulder at him. "I filmed it so Alexis and my mother can see when they get back home later. I know they'll love it. My mother a lot, she'll call you a little actress after that."</p>
      <p>"You, you thought I was good?" Julia whispered.</p>
      <p>"Pretty awesome," Castle said seriously. He was pleased at the shy smile that spread across the little girl's face and said, "Are you ready to go on vacation now?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can we go Mommy?" Julia asked Beckett eagerly.</p>
      <p>"We can, but we're going home to get you changed," Beckett replied. "We'll see you there," she said to Castle in a low tone of voice though they were alone.</p>
      <p>"I'll be over right after I drop this off," he said, showing Julia the video camera. "Hope you'll be ready."</p>
      <p>"We will," Beckett said before she watched Castle turn and walk out of the auditorium. "Okay, ready?" she asked her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Go Mommy," Julia said, smiling when Beckett laughed slightly and then started to walk up the aisle after grabbing her ballet class bag. "Are you excited to go?" she asked as they stepped out into the late morning light.</p>
      <p>"Very," Beckett said. "We'll have a lot of fun, I promise," she said before she went to the curb, and let Julia hail the cab for them, kissing her temple gently.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Okay, so Julia stay here while we get your car seat set okay?" Beckett was saying to her daughter as Castle was loading the two suitcases into the trunk of his car. "Don't walk away because it won't take us long."</p>
      <p>"I will stay Mommy," Julia said seriously. She watched, hugging her Stitch doll closely to her as Beckett picked up the car seat and put it in the backseat before Castle joined her, going in from the other side.</p>
      <p>"You might want to put her in the middle," Castle was telling Beckett as he pushed the seat there. "You can get to her easier."</p>
      <p>"Should I just let you take care of this? You've obviously got more experience than I do," Beckett said as she watched him pull out the seatbelt and secure the seat with it which she buckled</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I might need to buckle her up, those things can be tough," Castle said, setting the last strap. "Okay, that's as tight as it'll get."</p>
      <p>"Julia, go around okay? Castle will help you up," Beckett said, looking over her shoulder to see the little girl standing close to her.</p>
      <p>When he heard Julia walking up to him, Castle got out of the car and said, "I think you're big enough to try and get into your seat. If you need help just ask." He watched as the little girl got into the backseat and then climbed up on the backseat, Beckett helping her a little before she was settled.</p>
      <p>"Okay, I think I've got these set," Beckett said as she helped Julia put her arms through the straps on top before buckling them together and last to the lap buckle. "Comfortable sweetie?" she asked, checking to make sure it was secure enough but not too tight.</p>
      <p>"Yeah. Mommy I'm hungry," Julia said as her mother handed her her Stitch doll.</p>
      <p>"Hold on," Beckett said, reaching into the bag she'd put on the floor in front of Julia. "Here, eat all of it please, even the crusts, you didn't eat much at breakfast," she said, handing a sandwich in a plastic bag to the little girl.</p>
      <p>"My stomach was dancing already," Julia said before she took a bite.</p>
      <p>"I can imagine," Beckett said before she got out of the back and closed the door as Castle walked around to her. "You know this'll be the first time she's ever been outside the city," she told him.</p>
      <p>"Are you allowed to take her? I never thought to ask," Castle said as they stepped up to the passenger door.</p>
      <p>"I called Social Services last night and they said it was fine," Beckett said. "If I tried to take her out of state or out of the country then I'd be in trouble. But the great thing is, no surprise visits."</p>
      <p>"Have they been getting bad?" Castle asked, reaching for the handle of the door but pausing in case Beckett didn't want Julia to hear their conversation.</p>
      <p>"No, it's just I get on edge seeing someone's there, questioning if I'm taking care of my daughter," Beckett said. "It's frustrating."</p>
      <p>"Only three more months of it though, and once she starts school they probably won't be able to visit too much," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I'm just ready to get out of the city for a while, forget everything that's been on my mind," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"So Julia's first road trip," Castle said as he opened the door for her.</p>
      <p>"It is," Beckett said, looking back at Julia who was touching her sandwich to her doll's mouth. "Julia, I think he's eaten already," she said gently as Castle got into the car.</p>
      <p>"He wanted to taste," Julia giggled. "He says it's good Mommy."</p>
      <p>"Are we stopping for lunch?" Castle asked, looking back with her at the little girl.</p>
      <p>"No, I wanted to go straight to the house, but don't worry, I thought ahead," Beckett said as she reached in the bag Julia's sandwich had been in. She pulled out two sandwiches and said, "I can drive if you need me to."</p>
      <p>"Not a problem," Castle said. "But I'll eat further on, for right now," he said as he started up the car. "Time for our road trip to begin."</p>
      <p>"What's that?" Julia asked as Beckett handed her some water from the bag.</p>
      <p>"When you drive some place in the car that takes a long time," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, can we listen to <em>England</em> now?" Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"You mind if we listen to her music?" Beckett asked Castle as he pulled out of the parking under her building.</p>
      <p>"No, but what's England?" he asked, glancing over at her as she pulled Julia's iPod out of her purse.</p>
      <p>"George Harrison," Beckett said, going to the album on the screen. "<em>Somewhere in England</em>."</p>
      <p>"Don't think I've heard that one playing at your place," Castle commented.</p>
      <p>"It's a recent purchase, after Julia remembered a song and wouldn't leave me alone until I bought the album for her," Beckett said. The first song started, the volume a little loud, and she flinched slightly. "Song always does that when I play it," she said, glancing over her shoulder at Julia who was giggling slightly. "And you always do that too," she said to the little girl.</p>
      <p>"It's funny," Julia said. "Thank you Mommy, for my music."</p>
      <p>"You're welcome," Beckett said, sitting back in her seat. "Yes, the first notes startle me," she said in mock exasperation to Castle who was smiling.</p>
      <p>"I didn't say anything," he said defensively. "But that's nice of you to take such an interest in her music."</p>
      <p>"Oh, I was interested in The Beatles long before Julia was born, Paul too," Beckett said, getting her sandwich.</p>
      <p>"Really, you're a Macca fan?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"My mother loved him," Beckett said with a slight smile.</p>
      <p>"So it runs in families," Castle said. "Which would explain why Alexis is a fan too."</p>
      <p>"I had a number of friends in college who were the same, their parents were fans, they were fans too," Beckett said. "But I'm just glad for the coincidence," she said softly as she glanced back at Julia.</p>
      <p>"Makes you closer?" Castle said, glancing in the rearview mirror at the little girl who was singing to the song playing then.</p>
      <p>"And it's something you two have in common too," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"We'll be hearing a lot of her music at the beach house," Castle said. "Which will be pretty awesome. Still think she's the coolest four year old I've ever met."</p>
      <p>Beckett didn't reply to that, merely reached over and squeezed Castle's arm, looking back at her daughter. She smiled as Julia paused in her quiet singing to grin at her and she sat back, sighing as she felt the last of her tension leave her body as they approached the outer limits of the city.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Okay, here we are, finally," Castle said as he pulled up in front of his beach house. "Didn't realize there would be so much construction."</p>
      <p>"Is there another route to here?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but it's actually longer," Castle replied, getting out of the car and hurrying around the front.</p>
      <p>"Hold on sweetie," Beckett said to Julia, checking to make sure she was okay since the little girl was so quiet. "I'll come around to get you out."</p>
      <p>"She okay?" Castle asked as he opened the door for Beckett. "She's really quiet and she's been pretty loud for her this whole trip."</p>
      <p>"I know, was amazing to see," Beckett said. "Thought you were going to swerve off the road when she saw those horses."</p>
      <p>"That was a hell of a scream," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"She might be tired, but she doesn't really like to take naps," Beckett said as she walked around to Julia's side. "Hey, you ready to get out now?" she asked her daughter after she had opened the door and was working on the straps of the car seat. She was surprised when the little girl only nodded, her green eyes wide, and she quickly got her out of the seat. "What do you think?" she asked as she stood in front of the house.</p>
      <p>"Is it a palace?" Julia blurted out after looking for a moment.</p>
      <p>"No, just a regular beach house," Castle said, chuckling slightly as Beckett laughed a little. "But you're going to love it, your room has windows that look out on the ocean, and your bed is right against the windows so you can look out at the water when you wake up in the morning." He then turned his attention to Beckett as he opened the trunk and said, "We should give her the tour and get our luggage up to our rooms."</p>
      <p>"You'll give her the tour, I've only been here one other time remember?" Beckett reminded him.</p>
      <p>"Oh, that's right, interesting trip," Castle said. "What if…" he started to say.</p>
      <p>"It better not happen again," Beckett said, knowing he was referring to her first visit and the murder they'd ended up investigating.</p>
      <p>"What happened Mommy?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Nothing sweetie, let's get inside so you can see," Beckett said quickly to distract her. She took her suitcase and Julia's before Castle opened the front door and they stepped inside.</p>
      <p>"Okay, I say we start at the second floor, get the suitcases dropped off and then work our way down," Castle said after he read a note from the caretaker that had been on the front door.</p>
      <p>"Ready sweetie?" Beckett said, turning to her daughter who was looking around, her green eyes wide again. "Julia, come on," she said as she and Castle headed for the stairs but the little girl remained in place. She grabbed her hand and had her go up the stairs in front of her as they followed Castle.</p>
      <p>"Okay, since you are my guest Julia, I'm going to go ahead and show you your room first," Castle said as he waited for them at the top of the stairs. "And you're right over here." He led them to the left and at the first door he stopped and opened it. "After you," he said, smiling at Beckett, wondering if she remembered that room.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, look at the water!" Julia cried out as she ran up to the window. She watched the breaking waves for a moment and then looked around the room, seeing there were some large vases with sand and strands of sea grass in it, a bowl of shells in between them on the dresser. "Shells like at home," she said to Beckett excitedly.</p>
      <p>"I picked the right room," Castle said, standing in the doorway with Beckett, watching the little girl as she touched one of the drawer pulls of the dresser that was made to look like it was old and the paint was fading. "Do you like it Julia?" he asked. When she nodded, he grabbed Julia's suitcase and pushed it into the room a little. "Want to see the other rooms?"</p>
      <p>"Are there more?" Julia asked, turning from the bowl for a moment.</p>
      <p>"There are," Beckett said. "Come on, you should see them, they're really nice," she said, walking in and taking her daughter's hand.</p>
      <p>"Does Alexis have a room?" Julia asked as they went to the next door which was across the hall.</p>
      <p>"It's this one," Castle said. He opened the door and let her walk in to look around, which was decorated with different nautical tools and pieces of driftwood.</p>
      <p>"It's pretty," Julia said, touching an old sextant that was lying on a dresser.</p>
      <p>"She'll be glad you think that, come on, two more rooms," Castle said. "You'll really like how Alexis' grandmother has hers decorated."</p>
      <p>With Julia in tow, Castle and Beckett walked down the hall to look at the other two rooms before they walked back towards the stairs.</p>
      <p>"Where will you sleep Mommy?" Julia asked as she and Beckett walked down the hall hand in hand.</p>
      <p>"Here with Castle," Beckett answered as they reached the only door on that side of the second floor. She walked in with Julia as he got their luggage and pulled it in after them.</p>
      <p>"Oh, what are those?" Julia asked, looking up at the ceiling.</p>
      <p>"Fans," Beckett said. "You have the same in your room; I'm surprised you didn't see it."</p>
      <p>"What's this?" Julia said, running to the fireplace that had an anchor in it.</p>
      <p>"Fire comes out of there," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Why do you burn that?" Julia pointed to the anchor.</p>
      <p>"It's metal so it actually doesn't burn, just gets covered in soot, kinda like Santa does when he has to go through chimneys," Castle told the little girl, bending over so he was more even with her. "Why don't we check out downstairs, and then we'll go ahead and show you the backyard and you can see the ocean up close?"</p>
      <p>Beckett took Castle's hand as he walked by her and entwined their fingers as she checked behind them to make sure that Julia was following them. "Was I like that when we last came here?" she asked him as they walked down the hall.</p>
      <p>"You didn't ask as many questions, but pretty much," Castle said. "Oh, hey, did you see… Julia?" he said as he stopped Beckett at the top of the stairs and turned to see the little girl was back by the door to his room, pressed against the wall. "Looks like we've got a straggler," he said, smiling at Beckett. "You okay?" he said as he walked back to Julia.</p>
      <p>"What if I get lost here?" Julia whispered.</p>
      <p>"Well, we'll be around don't worry, we don't want you to get lost," Castle said, gently touching the little girl's back to direct her to where her mother was standing. "And if you need your mom at night, she's right here in there with me."</p>
      <p>"Don't worry sweetie," Beckett said, picking her up. "This place isn't too hard to figure out. I did the first time I was here."</p>
      <p>"Was my mommy like me when she came?" Julia asked Castle as they went down the stairs.</p>
      <p>"No, but she was like you were looking at everything with wide eyes," Castle said, smiling when Julia giggled as he widened his own eyes.</p>
      <p>"I wasn't expecting the house to look like this," Beckett said in her own defense though she was smiling. "Wait until you see the windows that look out on the beach Julia," she said as Castle led them first to the doorway of his office. "I know you'll like the view there."</p>
      <p>After showing Julia through the living room and kitchen so she would know her way around, Castle led the way to the doors leading out to the back, and opened it before he waited for Beckett to lead the little girl out.</p>
      <p>Sharing a smile with Castle as Julia gasped slightly, her green eyes wide again; Beckett took his hand and said, "What do you think?"</p>
      <p>Julia didn't respond, only looked around, her gaze always returning to the ocean in front of them before she wrapped her arms around Beckett's leg.</p>
      <p>"You can go walk down to the sand," Castle said. "If your mom says it's okay of course," he quickly added when Beckett looked at him with an eyebrow raised.</p>
      <p>"Can I Mommy?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Of course, but I want you to stay in the sand next to the grass," Beckett said as she took Julia's hand and led her down the lawn. "Go on Julia," she said, stopping in front of the two chairs near the sand. "I'll be right here watching you," she said.</p>
      <p>"Hold Stitch for me Mommy?" Julia asked, holding up her doll. After Beckett had taken it, she ran down to the sand and then stopped, seeing some strands of sea grass and little pieces of driftwood.</p>
      <p>"Here," Castle said after going into the house for a few minutes. He smiled at Beckett and handed her one of the glasses of red wine he held before he said, "I think it was a good idea to bring you two here."</p>
      <p>"It was," Beckett said, not quite hearing the plural in his words, watching her daughter as she started to make a mound in the sand.</p>
      <p>"Good place for you both to heal completely," Castle said. When Beckett looked at him in slight confusion he said, "Neither of you has recovered from what happened in Queens. Julia I'm not really that worried about, she's got you, she has someone to care for her. But you Kate?"</p>
      <p>Beckett looked at him for a moment before she looked down at Julia's doll and said, "I'm… not… sure," hesitating as she wasn't sure if she wanted to share what she'd been going through for the past three months with him. She finally gave up and took a deep breath before saying, "I can't really shake what happened in that house. What Harris tried to do to me. But I've tried not to make a big deal out of it, I was lucky. I've seen hundreds of cases of women who were more unlucky and got a lot worse than what I had done to me. But, I just, I can't stop seeing his eyes, dead eyes still, especially when I'm dreaming."</p>
      <p>"I know you've been fighting this already," Castle said. When Beckett looked at him with wide eyes he said, "You tense up still when we're… together. It hurt at first, until I realized it wasn't me you were reacting to. I should have said something sooner but, damn it Kate, you always project the sense of wanting to be independent, and I respect that because that's a part of many reasons why I love you. But this is different; it's not something you can take care of on your own. And it's more than just nearly being assaulted, something I have been trying to figure out but I've gotten nowhere close to seeing what it is that's bothering you about Queens."</p>
      <p>Beckett was quiet, looking down at her daughter's doll again before she looked up at Julia and then said, "It's because I was fighting not for myself, but for her," her voice barely audible over the crashing waves.</p>
      <p>"You did the best you could with what you had in that situation though," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I know, but I've doubted myself for the past three months, asking myself if there wasn't more I could have done to keep her from being chloroformed or even us being kidnapped," Beckett said. "If I had just picked her up when we were running… but I know they were waiting and getting ready to take us so it wouldn't have mattered in the end," she said with a sigh before she leaned back. "But they're two separate things Castle," she said, looking at him. "My assault and Julia are separate, they just come together with my becoming a mother and my self-doubts about whether or not I can raise her as well as my mother raised me. If I can protect her, make sure that she's happy, safe…"</p>
      <p>"You can't compare yourself to her Kate," Castle said quickly. "You're different as mothers. But you know you're doing a great job with her. Did you see her on the trip up? You talked about some of the things we've done together, trying to get her to see I'm not someone to be scared of. Do you remember when we first met her; she was terrified of everyone but you. And now? She has a friend in her ballet class; she's a big fan of Alexis and my mother too. You've given her a life outside a two story brownstone, and that was more than her birth mother ever gave her."</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia whispered, walking up to them then.</p>
      <p>"Sweetie," Beckett said, wiping away the tear off her cheek she'd been unable to stop escaping. She wrapped her arms tightly around her daughter and said, "Sorry, I was just thinking of something that made me very happy. You can play in the sand a little more okay?" When Julia nodded, looking a little unsure, she shared a kiss with her before she watched her walk back to the mounds of sand Julia was building up and decorating with grass strands and driftwood. "These next two weeks," she said slowly, glancing at Castle as she set the doll in her lap before reaching out to take his hand. "I want us to try and recover from Queens, put it all behind us, and I want to be Kate Beckett, not an NYPD Detective who's still going through a probationary period to adopt Julia. I want to just be her mother."</p>
      <p>"Not a problem," Castle said, squeezing her hand as he set down his wine glass. He covered hers with his free hand and said, "Do you want to share separate rooms?"</p>
      <p>"I said I want to recover, and that means everything that happened to me," Beckett said firmly. "And also be your girlfriend too, would like to try and have a normal visit here as opposed to last time."</p>
      <p>"I can't make any guarantees," Castle said. "But I'm hoping no one comes up from the sea shot in the chest." They were both quiet then, watching Julia together before he asked, a little hesitantly at first, "Kate, I want to ask something that I've been meaning to for a while but held back on."</p>
      <p>"You hold back? Must be serious," Beckett said, smiling slightly as she turned to look at him.</p>
      <p>"Not really, I'm just not sure what your reaction will be," Castle said. He looked down at their hands and said, "Feel free to get angry at me though because it might be one of those things that's none of my business. But does Julia know about your mom?"</p>
      <p>Beckett glanced at her daughter before she nodded and said, "You know I have pictures of her at my place, and that box I have. She's seen them and I had to tell her. Because she knows that I had to have had a mother. And since she's never seen her grandmother I had to tell her that my mom is… well I used the explanation her birth mother gave her for death."</p>
      <p>"The sky?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes, that's the best that I could do, she's only four and I am not telling her that her grandmother was murdered," Beckett sighed, sipping some wine. "But I wish, I really wish I didn't have to tell her about her grandmother, that she was here to see Julia, that I could talk to her about adopting her and about being a mother."</p>
      <p>Castle knew he couldn't really say anything to that, so he merely squeezed her hand and said, "I think if she was here," after he'd thought for a moment. "She would tell you to adopt Julia and that being a mother is something that's going to come naturally to a woman, and you're no different." When Beckett looked at him in slight surprise he said, "My mother told me the same after Alexis was born, was a little unsure about being a father. It was then I really wished I knew who he was," he finished absently.</p>
      <p>Beckett began to speak but quickly stopped herself since she had never really heard much from him about his father other than the fact that he had no idea who the man was. She smiled slightly and set down her wine glass before she covered his hand with her free one. "Thank you," she finally said as they looked at each other.</p>
      <p>"You're welcome, but I really think that's what she'd say," Castle said, shrugging. "And I think she would also think you were doing a pretty good job being a mother to her."</p>
      <p>"Mommy!" Julia said suddenly then, running over to her and leaning against her legs as Beckett and Castle let go of each other. "Can I see the shells?"</p>
      <p>"We can walk for a little," Beckett said, looking at her watch. "And then we need to unpack before we eat."</p>
      <p>"Hurry," Julia said eagerly as Beckett took off her boots and then socks. She sat down on the grass herself and took off her sandals, squealing when her mother grabbed her leg and rolled up the leggings she was wearing under her skirt. "Can we go?" she asked eagerly as Beckett picked her up.</p>
      <p>"Mind if I go too?" Castle asked then as he stood up, his feet bare as well. He smiled when Beckett merely took his hand and they walked down onto the sand.</p>
      <p>"Easy Julia," Beckett said as the little girl tried to run when she set her down on the sand. "The shells aren't going anywhere."</p>
      <p>"Sorry," Julia said quickly, slowing down until they got to the line of shells on the sand. She got on her knees and picked up the first shell she saw before she used her skirt as a holder, putting the shell on it.</p>
      <p>"Wait, here, give me the shells you find, you're going to ruin your skirt," Beckett laughed as Julia set two more with the first.</p>
      <p>"You're going to need a huge bowl by the end of these two weeks," Castle said as he took some shells from her.</p>
      <p>"I know, I'll have to watch her," Beckett said, shaking her head. "Okay, Julia, that's enough for today, why don't we go see how the water is?"</p>
      <p>"Are we gonna go in?" Julia asked nervously, looking up at her mother.</p>
      <p>"No, just our feet, I don't want to go swimming in my clothes," Beckett said, setting down the shells Julia had found in a pile before brushing off her hands. She took her daughter's hand and they walked down to the water, Castle following them. She watched Julia closely as a wave broke over their feet, and she was relieved when the little girl squealed slightly in joy as the wave unsettled the sand around them.</p>
      <p>"Can we go in more?" Julia asked eagerly, kicking her leg at the water.</p>
      <p>"Little more," Beckett said, stepping forward with her. She laughed when Julia jumped over the incoming wave and splashed them a little landing in the water.</p>
      <p>"That gives me an idea," Castle said, touching Beckett's back. "Can we try and pick you up over the waves?" he asked Julia, standing to her left. "That way you don't splash your mom so much."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said softly, taking his offered hand. She looked up at her mother, a little nervous with him touching her.</p>
      <p>"Ready?" Castle asked Beckett. "Okay, one, two, three," he counted quickly as the next wave came in. At three they picked the little girl up, lifting her up high off the sand to her cry of surprise that turned quickly into delight as the water on her feet arched out into the ocean.</p>
      <p>"Again?" Julia said eagerly, jumping up and down in excitement.</p>
      <p>"After the next wave," Beckett said, smiling at how happy she was. She leaned down and kissed the top of Julia's head before she and Castle waited for the next wave and lifted her above the water, the little girl shrieking happily. "One more," she said before Julia could ask her. "And then we should go inside."</p>
      <p>After she was lifted into the air a third time, Julia tried to beg for another turn, but her mother quickly told her to pick up her shells in case they got lost. She hurriedly picked them up and carried them in her skirt before she asked worriedly, "Where's Stitch?"</p>
      <p>"Up there on the chair," Castle said, holding Beckett's hand as they walked up to her daughter. "He was getting a tan."</p>
      <p>"He can't, he's got fur," Julia said with a slight laugh as Beckett took her shells.</p>
      <p>"He was taking a nap," Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"Can I tell him about the water?" Julia asked pleadingly.</p>
      <p>"You can, but don't run," Beckett started to say but was too late as Julia took off. "Should have spoken quicker," she said to Castle as they followed her.</p>
      <p>"Was something else I wanted to say while we were talking Kate," Castle said, watching her as she was looking at the shells.</p>
      <p>"What?" Beckett asked, surprised at his slightly serious tone of voice.</p>
      <p>"I think adopting Julia was a good idea, for you," Castle said. When she looked a little confused he said, "You talked about that wall you built up after your mother's… after," he finished with as they were approaching Julia who was leaning against a chair and talking earnestly to her doll.</p>
      <p>"That was more to do with you," Beckett said, wondering where he was going with his line of thought.</p>
      <p>"Yes, but that wasn't the only wall. I know you, and seeing you with Julia, you're almost an entirely different person," Castle said. "A child will do that."</p>
      <p>"You're right," Beckett said. "I realized that if I wanted to raise her right, I couldn't put on a tough front and try and be emotionally distanced from everything. I'm guessing you like that?"</p>
      <p>"Well, you still hide behind some things, but we'll work on that," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Right," Beckett said, shaking her head. "Come on Julia, let's rinse off your feet and go inside," she called to her daughter who was watching her and Castle walking up.</p>
      <p>"Do we unpack?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"After we go inside," Beckett said, reaching out and taking Julia's hand before they went to rinse off their feet.</p>
      <p>"Almost forgot the pool," Castle said once they had their shoes back on. "Come on Julia, I think you're really going to like this," he said as he led them down past the gazebo and to the pool. He opened the gate and said, "I hope you'll wait to go in here with your mom and I," as Julia walked inside first.</p>
      <p>Julia didn't respond to that, looking at the pool with wide eyes and then turning to see everything around it before she said, "We swim in here?"</p>
      <p>"We do, and Castle's right, you need to stay out of here if you're by yourself," Beckett said, kneeling next to the little girl. "Promise me okay?"</p>
      <p>"I promise," Julia said, hugging her with one arm tightly. "When do we swim?"</p>
      <p>"I thought we could try it out tomorrow," Castle said. "Unless you have some other plans?"</p>
      <p>"Here? I have no idea what we're going to do for two weeks," Beckett said as they headed back to the house. "Besides the pool and beach. So I'll let you lead us, just nothing crazy okay?"</p>
      <p>"Got it," Castle said. "And time to unpack?" he asked as they walked back into the house and he left the door open for the breeze. When Beckett nodded he sighed and said to Julia, "Part that I don't like, it takes too long. I say we should just leave everything in the suitcases."</p>
      <p>"Mommy said they get wrinkled like that," Julia said, smiling as Castle looked at her questioningly.</p>
      <p>"And I've got some things I really don't want to have to iron," Beckett said, heading for the stairs.</p>
      <p>"You know I have a really good iron…" Castle began, watching her. "Shoot," he said, snapping his fingers since Julia was looking back at him. "Alright, I'll unpack, but I'm going to go really fast."</p>
      <p>"So will I," Beckett said as Julia tugged on the bottom of her shirt. "I believe my daughter is starting to get hungry."</p>
      <p>"Great, I have an idea for dinner, but we'll discuss later," Castle said before he watched Beckett and Julia walk to the room the little girl was going to be using. He turned then and walked to his room, feeling a lot better about how Julia was responding to him, hoping that she would open up a lot more towards him since she was already acting more comfortable around him; a marked difference from the day before.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>After they had unpacked, the three met downstairs in the kitchen where Castle asked the two what they wanted to eat.</p>
      <p>"Do you not have anything to cook with?" Beckett asked, looking in the fridge and seeing some milk, juices and fruits.</p>
      <p>"Tomorrow's the farmer's market, I thought we could take Julia and grab stuff we need there," Castle said. "I do that with Alexis when we're here. Have you taken her to one in the city?"</p>
      <p>"I've been sleeping in those Saturdays and Sundays," Beckett said. "So we're ordering out."</p>
      <p>"Right, now there's a place I thought you might want to try out Julia, if it's okay with you and your mom. It's a little Dim Sum place, pretty close so we should get our food fast," Castle said to the little girl.</p>
      <p>"What's that?" Julia asked in confusion, hugging her doll tight against her.</p>
      <p>"You've never had that?" Castle asked. When Julia shook her head he said, "The take out menu has pictures. How about you help me look for it?"</p>
      <p>"Can I?" Julia asked Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said, smiling at Castle as she knew what he was doing.</p>
      <p>"Okay, I know it's in one of these drawers here," Castle said, leading Julia to four drawers. "And it's not these two on the ends, so let me try and see what's inside them with my mind," he said, putting his fingers to his temples and closing his eyes tightly.</p>
      <p>Watching Julia staring at Castle with wide eyes, Beckett had to cover her mouth with her hand so she wouldn't start laughing. She looked down at her daughter when he then told her to close her eyes since he was going to tell her through their minds where the menu was, and she looked down at the floor for a moment.</p>
      <p>"Okay, now you tell your mom which drawer it is Julia," Castle said. He watched as Julia reached up to the left shelf before he quickly nudged her arm to the right. "That one?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, shaking her head and looking up at her mother.</p>
      <p>"Let's see," Beckett said as she ran her hand over Julia's hair and then stepped forward to open the drawer. "You did a good job sweetie," she said, showing Julia a menu. "This is what Dim Sum is," she said, finding the restaurant that Castle had been talking about and showing it to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"What do you think?" Castle asked, reaching for the phone.</p>
      <p>"Can we try?" Julia asked shyly.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said before she looked at the menu itself. "Get some steamed rice first, she'll eat that for sure," she told Castle.</p>
      <p>"Hold on, I'll tell them as you tell me," he said quickly as he dialed the place. He talked to the owner who had answered at the restaurant and then placed the order as Beckett told him before he hung up. "Should be here in a half hour," he told them.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, can we play music?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Cool, I hope so, are we still listening to <em>England</em>?" Castle asked, putting his face on his fists.</p>
      <p>"No, I want to listen to <em>Three</em>," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Three?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"<em>Thirty Three 1/3</em>," Beckett said, going to her purse in the foyer to grab Julia's iPod.</p>
      <p>"George Harrison again, nice," Castle said. "You need help with that?"</p>
      <p>"You can set it up, Julia and I will set the table," Beckett said, walking back with the iPod. She got it ready before she took her daughter over to the kitchen and was surprised; when the music started to play and Julia began to bounce up and down. "Okay, go over to the other room sweetie, Castle can watch you and you won't bump into anything," she said, smiling as she had to stop her before she ran into the table.</p>
      <p>"I'll be good," Julia said quickly, immediately stopping and hurrying to set one of the napkins she held on the table.</p>
      <p>Frowning slightly, Beckett quickly kissed Julia on the cheek before they finished with the table. She wasn't surprised at her daughter reverting back to her old attitude towards Castle, but before she worried that Julia was taking a giant step backwards, the doorbell rang and she could hear him talking to someone at the door.</p>
      <p>The food had been delivered, and sitting down at the table with Julia, Castle and Beckett started to discuss what they could do for the next two weeks, trying to include the little girl in their conversation though she was busy eating.</p>
      <p>"I'm guessing the Dim Sum was a good idea," Beckett said as she had to stop Julia again from eating so fast. "Julia, sweetie, take it easy," she said, holding the little girl's wrist to stop her from putting a whole dumpling in her mouth.</p>
      <p>"Sorry Mommy but I'm hungry," Julia said softly as Beckett quickly cut the dumpling into smaller pieces.</p>
      <p>"I know, but you need to be careful or you'll make yourself sick," Beckett said. "It's like a seesaw with her, she's either not hungry or starving," she said, shaking her head as she looked at Castle.</p>
      <p>"That's how kids are," he said, smiling a little.</p>
      <p>"And you tell me this now," Beckett said, smiling back at him.</p>
      <p>"You never asked," Castle said, raising his hands. "Julia," he said then as the little girl was staring at her plate and not moving. "You can eat again you know," he said, exchanging a look with Beckett. "And if you eat slowly I'll give you a surprise after dinner. For you and your mom."</p>
      <p>"What is it?" Julia asked, looking up at him.</p>
      <p>"It's a surprise, but you'll like it, I promise," Castle said. "Go ahead and eat, your food'll get cold."</p>
      <p>"It's alright Julia, and I would like to see what he has for us," Beckett said, spearing a piece of spring roll with her fork and feeding it to her daughter.</p>
      <p>The meal continued after that normally, and Castle brought their conversation back to what they could do while they were visiting the area. When they had finished, Julia leaned against a cabinet door in the kitchen, watching as her mother and Castle quickly cleaned up everything, talking together quietly.</p>
      <p>"Okay, you ready for your surprise?" Castle asked Julia as he dried off his hands. He smiled when she nodded slightly, and he waited for Beckett to grab her hand before he led them to the family room and turned on the TV.</p>
      <p>"Wow, I wasn't expecting you to have such a high tech TV here," Beckett said as the TV menu had different windows for things like Netflix, Hulu and YouTube.</p>
      <p>"We have movie nights here, I thought why not go all out for this," Castle said, going onto Netflix. "I'll be right back," he said as he handed the remote to Beckett before he hurried back into the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"Where did he go for?" Julia asked, sitting up on her knees to look over the back of the couch.</p>
      <p>"Not sure," Beckett said, looking behind with her daughter. "Dessert?" she asked a few minutes later when he came back in the room carrying a tray.</p>
      <p>"Almost forgot," Castle said, setting the tray down on the table. "Asked for these to be delivered before we got here from a bakery that Alexis always visits a few blocks away. They have really great coffee by the way; I'll have to take you Kate."</p>
      <p>"And the movie?" Beckett reminded him as he handed her a plate with a fruit tart on it.</p>
      <p>"Oh, right," Castle said, sitting down next to her and taking back the remote. "Not sure if you've seen this movie already Julia," he said as he glanced at the little girl while he was searching on the screen. "But I thought you'd like to watch it."</p>
      <p>"Is that The Beatles?" Julia asked eagerly as a poster for a movie came up on the TV.</p>
      <p>"<em>A Hard Day's Night</em>? I've been meaning to show it to her," Beckett said. "But never got a chance to watch it and make sure it's okay."</p>
      <p>"It is, my mother remembers this movie," Castle said, pressing play. "And I checked it out myself. It's safe."</p>
      <p>"You don't mind seeing it again?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"No way, you know I love The Beatles too, remember our talk on the way up here?" Castle asked her.</p>
      <p>"Yes, I'm still not sure how you like <em>The White Album</em> more than <em>Sgt. Pepper</em>," Beckett said as Julia giggled. "But you're right; you are a big fan too."</p>
      <p>"I like the songs John had on there, really gritty; George's too. And despite the Manson connection, I think <em>Helter Skelter</em> is the best," Castle said before the movie started. He smiled when Beckett rolled her eyes and wrapped her arm around Julia who had leaned against her and then turned his attention to the screen as the little girl squealed in joy at the opening chord.</p>
      <p>Julia tried her best to keep her eyes open through the entire movie, but she only got as far as Ringo being arrested before she wrapped her arms tighter around her mother and closed her eyes without realizing she was nodding off.</p>
      <p>"Stop the movie," Beckett said, touching Castle's arm then to get his attention.</p>
      <p>"She's out?" he asked, pausing the movie quickly. He saw when she picked Julia up that the little girl was asleep and he smiled a little before saying, "I'll wait down here."</p>
      <p>"Can you get some coffee for me?" Beckett asked, shifting Julia to her shoulder. When Castle nodded she walked to the stairs and went up to the first room on the left. Inside she tried to change her daughter into her pajamas as carefully as she could, but Julia still ended up awakening when she covered her with the bed sheet.</p>
      <p>"Mommy I missed the movie," Julia whispered.</p>
      <p>"No, it's okay, you can finish it tomorrow," Beckett said soothingly. "Get some sleep sweetie, I'll see you tomorrow. Love you Julia."</p>
      <p>"Love you," Julia mumbled, hugging her Stitch doll before she fell asleep.</p>
      <p>Leaning down, Beckett kissed Julia's forehead before she turned and left the room, slightly closing the door before she headed down the stairs, seeing Castle was at the bottom. "Too much stress from earlier," she said with a slight smile.</p>
      <p>"I don't blame her," Castle said, handing her a cup of coffee. "And you?"</p>
      <p>"I'm alright, we both got a full night of sleep which we haven't had since the beginning of the week, so I feel a lot better than I did yesterday," Beckett said. She walked outside with him and stood watching the ocean in front of them, slightly visible in the moonlight. "She's starting to warm up to you," she commented after they were quiet for a while.</p>
      <p>"I noticed, but I have to wonder if maybe tomorrow we're going to be heading back to square one," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"We'll have to see," Beckett said, finishing her coffee. "And since when are you so pessimistic Castle?"</p>
      <p>"I know how your daughter is," Castle said. "But I am trying."</p>
      <p>"You've been trying since I adopted her," Beckett said with a smile. "But you had more time than before today and it's working out a lot better."</p>
      <p>"Think she'd let me help her swim tomorrow?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Good question, I don't think I can answer that," Beckett said. "We'll just have to see tomorrow," she said before stepping back into the house without a word to him.</p>
      <p>Castle turned to her, about to speak when he saw she was gone, and he hurried inside after her. "Thanks for letting me know you left," he said, trying to sound as if he was frustrated.</p>
      <p>"I'm sorry," Beckett said with a smile as she handed him her cup. "Do you think you can do me a favor?"</p>
      <p>"I'll take it under consideration," Castle said as she placed her hand on his chest. "What is it?"</p>
      <p>"First, rinse these cups out, and get a drink, not a lot, just enough for us to share quickly," Beckett said, unable to stop smiling as Castle stared at her intently, knowing he had likely guessed what she wanted to do. "And doing all that, feel free to take all the time you need."</p>
      <p>"Right, I'll do my best," Castle said before she turned and walked over to the stairs. He breathed out and then turned, almost running to the kitchen before he stopped himself, remembering what she'd said, and walking instead, though he had to slow himself down every few steps as he began to speed up a little.</p>
      <p>On the second floor, Beckett quickly checked on Julia, opening the door enough to see her, still fast asleep before she turned and went to the bedroom. She closed the door and quickly went to her suitcase, pulling something out and leaving the case empty finally. She changed as quickly as she could before she walked over to the fireplace, starting the fire there as she heard footsteps outside in the hall that were not her daughter's.</p>
      <p>"So was this something you wanted to unpack," Castle commented as he locked the door behind him. "To keep it from getting wrinkled as you put it?"</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said simply with a slight smirk as she watched his eyes trail down her body. "Surprised?"</p>
      <p>"A lot, very pleasantly surprised though," Castle said, watching her as she walked up to him. "So this is what I needed to take my time for," he said, his voice growing lower in timbre as he put his right arm around her, pulling her closer to him.</p>
      <p>"Partially," Beckett said, taking the glass he had in his left hand. She took a sip of the scotch in it before handing it back to him and as he drank off the rest of the amber liquid asked, "Worth it?"</p>
      <p>"Very much, you didn't even tense up when I put my hand on you," Castle said.</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled and said, "I think I'm starting to recover as well, want to see if I'm right?"</p>
      <p>"I'd love to," Castle said before he laid her back on the bed, kissing her deeply. He let her move under him to slide further back so they would be on the bed fully, and he followed her, never breaking the contact of their lips. He kissed her neck as she pulled away from him, and was surprised when she pushed on his chest, but not hard enough to make him think she wanted him to stop. He sat up until the was on his knees and tried to respond as fast as he could to her suddenly crushing her lips to his, wrapping his arms around her tightly and pulling her firmly against him in the process.</p>
      <p>Keeping up the kiss as long as she could, Beckett knew she was going to need to breathe soon when Castle's hands slid over her back and started to pull at the back of her black nightgown she had changed into. She finally moved as he looked over her shoulder at her back and she smiled, kissing his earlobe whispering, "Thought you might like that."</p>
      <p>"The hell did you get into this without someone helping you?" Castle said, pulling her tighter to him though they were already as close as they could get. He went back to untying the ribbon holding the back of the nightgown closed, seeing in the light of the fire the fabric was a very dark blue. He had a little struggle with the end of the ribbon, but finally got it free and he quickly had her turn around so she was facing away from him.</p>
      <p>Glancing back over her shoulder, Beckett tensed up and shuddered at the same time as she could feel Castle's lips running over her skin. It was a brief brush that made her skin ripple in response, and she held up the front of her nightgown as he slid his hand down under the fabric at her right side. She felt his mouth then trail down where the ribbon had held the silk closed before he'd opened it, and she was burning up and quickly, his breath heating her skin as his mouth was open and breathing slightly, dampening her flesh.</p>
      <p>Sliding his other hand past the silk, Castle slid his lips up her back until he was at her shoulders. He started to pull the nightgown from there when she reached up, keeping him from doing so. He wanted to get it off her fully, but consoled himself with kissing her neck before he pulled away and let her turn around, letting go of her sides which he'd been holding onto. He helped her with his shirt, unbuttoned it with her as fast as their fingers could work together before she was pulling it off of his shoulders. He kissed her hard on the lips after he had thrown the shirt to the floor, not sure if it had even reached it. He didn't care, instead focusing on helping Beckett with the rest of his clothes as they were hurriedly kissing each other as they worked until he sat back against the headboard.</p>
      <p>Straddling Castle's legs, Beckett let him push her nightgown up on her legs until it was around her waist, and she wrapped one arm around him as he was doing that. She kissed his cheeks and lips before she pressed her lips to his again, lingering there that time. She felt his hands on her back and she shook a little as his fingertips brushed against her spine, sliding slowly and deliberately across her skin. Shaking slightly as she could feel the goose bumps breaking out, she reached up and pulled the front of her nightgown down so she could take the straps off her shoulders. He immediately lifted up her nightgown, and she let him pull it up off her head before grabbing her hips. She wrapped her arms around his neck as tightly as she could as she shifted enough to let him inside of her, and they kissed deeply before they began to move against one another, seeming to know when to start without a word to each other.</p>
      <p>Pressing down on the small of Beckett's back, pushing her harder against him as he bit at her neck slightly, Castle could easily tell the change in her. Before that point, after the incident in Queens, he had been able to sense her holding back with him after they had started being intimate again. But at that moment, he could feel that she wasn't holding back, and he hurried to follow her lead, as he'd done the same before since he hadn't wanted to push her further than he should. He ran his hand over her hair as she leaned her cheek against his, panting against his shoulder, and gently slid his fingers through the locks, pulling her head back enough to cover her mouth with his own.</p>
      <p>Shaking a little, Beckett responded to the kiss while she was starting to move faster, something in her pushing her to. She had been ignoring those thoughts and desires for three months, and she was tired of doing so. She felt Castle's hand on her back roaming the skin, and she could feel the moisture that had built up from her work and she slid her hands down to his chest, pushing him away from her enough for them to look at each other. She was still a little shocked to see him and not Harris, who'd been in her nightmares for too long, and she fell against Castle, wrapping her arms around him a little desperately.</p>
      <p>Holding her tightly to him, Castle kissed Beckett's lips once and then reached down with one hand, going in between their still undulating bodies. He felt her tense when he started to touch her, and he tilted her head up using his other hand, kissing her hard. He felt her suddenly freeze her rough thrusts that had slowly become more haphazard, and he held her around the waist with one hand before he followed her willingly and kept his mouth on hers the entire time.</p>
      <p>Not sure how long it took for her to calm down; Beckett became more aware of herself realizing that she was leaning against Castle, her body shaking slightly. She lifted her head and looked at him as he sat up a little, having slid down somewhat at some point. "So, getting better?" she asked.</p>
      <p>"Definitely, but you saw Harris at one point?" Castle said, not wanting to bring that up but knowing he had to.</p>
      <p>"I always do," Beckett said, suppressing a shudder. "It's why I look at you when we're together. And why I do not want to be in the dark. It's harder to convince myself I'm with you."</p>
      <p>Hugging her to him, Castle started stroking her hair and said, "Then we'll leave the lights on, but you were more yourself."</p>
      <p>"I know, I've gotten tired of holding back, afraid… of what I don't know," Beckett said, sounding angry. "I'm tired of being angry."</p>
      <p>"Okay, so we'll work on that," Castle said as she got back up and stretched slightly. "And," he began to say when her fingers were suddenly under his chin, tilting up his head. "Sorry," he said as she shook her head though she didn't look too annoyed. "But I was going to say that we've got two weeks to work on that and that's a lot of time."</p>
      <p>"It is," Beckett said, nodding. She could feel his hand sliding up her side then, making her skin dance in response all the way up, and she glanced down as his fingers brushed against the bottom of her breast before pausing.</p>
      <p>"Do you want me to stop?" Castle asked, trying to gauge her expression but unable to see it since she was looking down. When she glanced at him and suddenly smirked, he was relieved, but a second later her hand was guiding his over her breast. "Okay," he breathed out before he lowered his head.</p>
      <p>Beckett quickly grabbed the back of his head and let him move them around so she was lying on her back. She wrapped her legs loosely around him as he started to move, but very slowly and deliberately she could feel, making her clutch at him tightly. Her fingers slid through his hair as he moved up, his lips pressing in a kiss to her skin here and there before he reached the hollow of her throat. When he bit down on it, a little harder than he usually would do, she suddenly jerked her body up against his, the echo of their hips meeting seeming to fill the room. She found that she had no problem knowing that it was Castle that she was with that time, as their lips brushed together, parting at the same time before he crushed her mouth with his.</p>
      <p>Being very careful to go as slowly as he could, knowing that he had to keep himself under control that time, wanting to convince her that she was not being assaulted by Harris, Castle let himself go a little crazy with their kiss. He swept around her mouth with his tongue before he touched her own tongue and they seemed to fight together for a moment before he had to pull away. He stared at her intently and then trailed his lips down from the corner of her mouth to her neck, groaning as her nails slid down the back of his head and to his shoulders. He sped up slightly, trying to make sure he was still making love to her but wanting to make sure she could feel enough pleasure before she was suddenly grabbing the back of his head and making him kiss her again.</p>
      <p>While they were busy kissing each other deeply, they quickly reached their inevitable end, nearly at the same time. They both slumped back on the bed, Castle's face buried in Beckett's neck, both of them panting hard.</p>
      <p>"Thank you for that," she said finally after she'd caught her breath.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, not a problem," Castle said. "Wait," he said, lifting his head. "For what?"</p>
      <p>"I didn't imagine Harris that time," Beckett said as Castle moved to lie down next to her. She got up and then went over to one of the windows to her left before she opened it slightly, the sound of breaking waves quickly entering the room.</p>
      <p>"Really?" Castle asked, getting up on his elbows and watching her walk back to the bed.</p>
      <p>"Don't ask me how it works," Beckett said, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing close against his side. "I just know that it did." They were quiet then and she felt his hand on her hip slide slightly back and forth. "What?" she asked, raising her head to look at him.</p>
      <p>Castle was about to answer that he wasn't going to say anything, but seeing the look on her face, he knew that she had recognized in his body language that he'd wanted to say something he was unsure about. "Something else I've wanted to ask you," he finally said. "Are you okay with being a mother?"</p>
      <p>"You've asked that before actually," Beckett said, looking bemused.</p>
      <p>"Back when you first adopted her," Castle said, glancing down at her. "And now you've had more time to get used to it."</p>
      <p>"You mean after what happened yesterday? Me passing out from all the stress?" Beckett pointed out. She smiled slightly when he nodded and said, "Well, I do love Julia, I'm not lying when I tell her that. But it's a little bit of a struggle, I can't really lie. It's not easy being a single mother. But when I saw Julia for the first time… that connection. I still don't know how to explain it, I knew it wasn't going to be really easy for me, but I needed to care for her."</p>
      <p>"You've done a great job with that," Castle said. "But please don't push yourself too far."</p>
      <p>"I get the feeling now you know what I've been going through the past three months you're going to be watching me closely so I don't," Beckett said wryly. She covered Castle's mouth quickly as he started to speak and said, "But please do because I thought I was fine but I really overestimated that."</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle said from behind her hand. He pulled it off his mouth and said, "But this vacation you're not a cop remember, you said."</p>
      <p>"I know, I'm just Julia's mother right now, and we can-" Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"And my girlfriend, remember, we're not coworkers right now," Castle said quickly interrupting her, wanting to remind her. "Though… we were working together just now, not what I meant though."</p>
      <p>"Okay, finished?" Beckett asked. When Castle nodded she sighed and then pressed herself closer to him, her arms wrapped around his neck as her cheek rested against his shoulder. "You're right though. And I was going to say that tomorrow we can go ahead and start trying to get Julia to trust you more."</p>
      <p>"You have an idea?" Castle asked. He felt her nod against him he then said, "Going to share?" when she didn't say anything for a while.</p>
      <p>"You'll find out tomorrow, goodnight Castle," Beckett said as she lifted her head enough to be able to kiss him before she lay back down.</p>
      <p>"Right, goodnight," Castle said, watching her. He watched as she fell asleep, curled against him before he leaned down and rested his chin on the top of her head, pressing a kiss to her hair. He sighed then, letting himself sleep as he tightened his hold on her, keeping her close against his side.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Wake Me, Warm Sea</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter are from two lyrics from the song Gone Troppo by George Harrison from his album of the same name.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>Turning over onto her side, Beckett opened her eyes as she heard the sound of her daughter's laughter, and she looked over at the other side of the bed, seeing that it was empty. She got up, looking around the room to see if Castle was still there, but then heard his voice outside. She glanced at the open window, and leaned over the other side of the bed, grabbing the shirt that he'd been wearing the day before. She walked over to the window after slipping it on and buttoning it in the middle, and looked out into the back, seeing that Castle and Julia were at the chairs in the grass and talking. She smiled a little when Julia's giggle reached her, and she turned around to get dressed and join them.</p>
      <p>"Did you really make my mommy talk like that?" Julia was asking.</p>
      <p>"Well, it wasn't me, it was because she met that guy," Castle told her. "And you know how much she and your grandfather love baseball."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Mommy and Grandpapa took me to see a game at Shea," Julia said. "They let me take Stitch too so he could see."</p>
      <p>"Shea? I think you mean Citi Field now Julia," Castle said, giving her a strawberry.</p>
      <p>"No, Mommy said she's going to call it Shea still, 'cause that where she went to see her first game too," Julia said. "And she said The Beatles played there too."</p>
      <p>"They did," Castle said, watching as she put the strawberry up to her doll's mouth. "You know when Paul comes into town he plays there too."</p>
      <p>"He does?" Julia asked in shock, her eyes wide.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, maybe next time he's on tour your mom could get you some tickets so you can see him," Castle said, getting an idea he hastily set aside for later. He watched Julia eat the strawberry finally before she slid down from the chair and walked a little ahead of him. "Not too far out," he warned her. "Your mom would really get mad at me if you went into the water."</p>
      <p>Julia turned back around and walked up to him, leaning on the arm of his chair as she held her doll against her tightly. She looked up at him, and then said, "Do, do you like my mommy?" in a whisper.</p>
      <p>For a second Castle wasn't sure he'd heard her correctly, but then realized he had and said, "Of course. Why?"</p>
      <p>"Mommy said she likes you a lot when I asked her," Julia said, looking at her doll. "And that you won't hurt her."</p>
      <p>"No, I would never do that," Castle said, touching her shoulder carefully. "Julia, I've known your mom for a long time, and I really would never want to hurt her. She's a pretty special woman."</p>
      <p>Julia was quiet for a minute before she said, "My mommy said you saved her life."</p>
      <p>"I did, but she's saved my life before," Castle said. "So we've helped each other out."</p>
      <p>"You won't hurt me will you?" Julia whispered softly.</p>
      <p>"Julia, no, no I wouldn't," Castle said firmly. "Your mom loves you and you are a wonderful little girl. Good dancer too." He smiled when she smiled up at him briefly before he said, "You're very important to your mom so that means you're important to me too; because she's important to me."</p>
      <p>Julia looked up at Castle, smiling a little, before she looked past him and her smile grew wider as she ran around the chairs crying, "Mommy!"</p>
      <p>"Good morning sweetie," Beckett said, walking down the yard and picking up her daughter when she ran to her. "How'd you sleep?" she asked after they shared a kiss.</p>
      <p>"Good, I liked the sounds of the water," Julia said happily. "Did you sleep good? Castle said you were sleeping when he came out of your room."</p>
      <p>"I slept great," Beckett replied. "Thanks for taking care of her," she said to Castle as she reached him.</p>
      <p>"I figured you could use the rest," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"So you were talking about the farmer's market yesterday," Beckett said when Julia tapped her shoulder. "What is it?" she asked.</p>
      <p>"What's that?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Farmers bring in their fruits and vegetables and sell them," Castle explained. "Well, not just produce, but flowers, meats, honey, things like that."</p>
      <p>"I should have taken her in the city," Beckett said as Julia still looked mystified. "You want to go and see what it is sweetie?"</p>
      <p>"Can we?" Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said. "Let's go get your shoes on and then we can go."</p>
      <p>"Did she bring her camera?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Oh, that's right, why don't you go get it Julia," Beckett said as they walked up to the house. "You can take pictures to put in your album at home." When they were inside she put the little girl down at the bottom of the stairs and as watched as she went up the stairs carefully. When she was out of earshot she looked at Castle and said, "She was up before us?"</p>
      <p>"I woke up to the sound of her talking near the door," Castle said. "She was talking to her doll, asking it if she should go inside the room. Does she always do that?"</p>
      <p>"She does, it's like a safety blanket, but a little more than a normal one for a child," Beckett said. She glanced up at the second floor and said, "She had that… her original doll with her in that hidden room after her mother pushed her in there. When she was the most terrified, that was all she had and she looks at it as a friend who understands her fear."</p>
      <p>"Is that what her psychiatrist says?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, she should be able to grow out of it, I'm hoping she does," Beckett said with a sigh. "It'll mean she's letting go of her fear of what happened the morning her mother was killed."</p>
      <p>"Which she doesn't remember," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"No, just the fear, that's where a lot of the nightmares are coming from, just that tiny room and the knowledge that someone put her there and someone else is going to hurt her," Beckett explained. "Julia, sweetie, can you find your camera?" she called up the stairs then.</p>
      <p>"Here Mommy," Julia said. "I had to tell Stitch to stay in bed 'cause he's tired." She started down then stairs, not seeing the smiles that her mother and Castle exchanged. "But I promised to show him my pictures."</p>
      <p>"Don't forget we're going to go swimming too," Beckett said, getting the little girl's sandals and putting them on her feet. "So you can show him after that. Okay, ready?"</p>
      <p>"I'm ready," Castle said. "It'll be fun Julia," he said as Beckett picked the little girl up. "They have these desserts I think you should ask your mom if you can have for breakfast. Oh, the bakery I told you about yesterday, usually has a stall there, can pick up some coffee with breakfast."</p>
      <p>"That sounds great, but you might want to vet desserts with me before telling my daughter Castle," Beckett said to him as they walked out to the street. "She's going to be bugging me about that until I get something for her to eat."</p>
      <p>"I didn't feed her much before you got up," Castle said. "So she might bug you a little more than you think. Sorry."</p>
      <p>"That's alright," Beckett said, setting Julia down when she started to try and get down. "Hold my hand," she said firmly to her before they continued on. "Is this place far?"</p>
      <p>"Not really, five minute walk, it's in the parking lot of the market," Castle said. "She'll be okay right?"</p>
      <p>"She will, I can just carry her if she gets tired," Beckett said, watching Julia skipping next to her. "Which might happen faster than I thought," she said, smiling at him.</p>
      <p>"Or I could carry her… if she'll let me," Castle said slowly.</p>
      <p>"We'll see," Beckett said with a shrug before she reached over to him and looped her arm though his, placing her hand on his arm. "I take it you usually buy a lot?" she asked, gesturing with her head towards the cart that he was bringing with them.</p>
      <p>"That way we never really need to go to the market, it's great during the summer since it can get pretty busy here," Castle replied. "And this market is one of the best around here, so it's a big help."</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said then. "I'm thirsty."</p>
      <p>"Here," Beckett said, reaching into her bag and pulling out a bottle of water as they stopped in front of a house. "I'm guessing we're getting close, there's a lot more cars around here."</p>
      <p>"We are, you doing okay Julia?" Castle asked the little girl as she was sipping some water.</p>
      <p>Nodding, Julia asked, "Can I go in that?" pointing to the cart.</p>
      <p>"It's a little too small to carry you," Beckett said. "Want me to take you the rest of the way?" When Julia nodded she started to pick up the little girl when Castle tried to stop her. She quickly shook her head no, knowing what he wanted to do, and was relieved when he nodded and then started to walk again with her.</p>
      <p>When they reached the start of the market, Castle had to smile at the surprised expression on Beckett's face saying, "Forgot to mention it's one of the largest in the area, so it's pretty popular."</p>
      <p>"I can see that," Beckett said. "Please tell me there's some kind of organization here."</p>
      <p>"It's mixed up, you'll get flower stalls next to vegetable stalls," Castle said. "But you've got your phone in case we get separated right?"</p>
      <p>"Yes. Julia," Beckett said, setting her daughter down before she grabbed her by the arms so she would look at her. "You know you need to stay with me or Castle right? Don't wander off or try to run ahead of us. Just ask one of us to look at something you want to see and we'll go with you."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said. "Mommy what can I take pictures of?"</p>
      <p>"Do you mind taking care of her here?" Beckett asked Castle as she stood up.</p>
      <p>"No, why?" Castle said, surprised at her request.</p>
      <p>"I was thinking, I'm not the best at taking pictures sweetie," Beckett said to Julia. "But Castle can help you and I can get our food. Would you mind if he did that with you?"</p>
      <p>"Are you gonna go away?" Julia asked, looking up at her mother worriedly.</p>
      <p>"No, I'll be with you guys, but I need to buy everything, so I'll be busy," Beckett said. "And Castle won't mind helping you, will you?" she asked him.</p>
      <p>"I'll be happy to help you Julia, if you want me to of course," Castle said, realizing that was her idea she'd gotten the day before.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Julia whispered as she took his outstretched hand. They followed Beckett, and when they came to the first stall she saw some vegetables, and she started running over to them, Castle following quickly. "What's that?" she asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"It's called chard," Castle said. "Here," he then told her as he helped her hold up her camera. "Try taking it like that, it'll be a good shot."</p>
      <p>Beckett was absently picking out some lettuce, watching the two as they took another picture of some cabbage stacked next to the chard. She smiled at Castle when he glanced at her, pleased when Julia tugged on his shirt to get his attention. She was reassured her idea had worked, and only hoped she wouldn't need to keep coming up with ideas like that one to help Julia trust him as much as she herself did. She turned her attention to the produce, picking up another bag before she turned to go to where her daughter and boyfriend were standing, Castle holding Julia up as she took a picture. "Hey, how's it going so far?" she asked her daughter, picking up some of the chard.</p>
      <p>"Your daughter is quite the photographer," Castle said, holding on to Julia as she hugged Beckett around the neck and kissed her cheek. "And I have a feeling she's going to be taking a lot of pictures."</p>
      <p>"She has enough space," Beckett said, watching him set Julia down, who immediately touched the chard she was holding. "We've got a lot of pictures from Central Park that she took."</p>
      <p>"Can I take a lot or no?" Julia asked, grabbing Beckett's arm.</p>
      <p>"Take as many as you want sweetie," Beckett said with a smile, leaning down and kissing the top of her head. "But we should keep moving before they go back to their farms okay?" When Julia shook her head she started to turn to pay for what she had chosen, but Castle grabbed the bags she held and went over to the farmer behind the table in the back of the stall. "Are you okay?" she asked, turning to Julia who leaned against her.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Castle was nice to me," the little girl replied, holding her mother's hand tightly as they stepped out into the sun. "He's nice Mommy."</p>
      <p>"He is," Beckett said, picking her up then, hugging her tightly as she was incredibly relieved to hear that. "Remember I work with him too, so if he wasn't nice I wouldn't want to go to work."</p>
      <p>"But wouldn't that be bad?" Julia said, her eyes wide.</p>
      <p>Beckett didn't reply to that, gently kissing her daughter's forehead before she saw that Castle was approaching them. "So I know what I need to get, but you?" she asked him as they continued down the aisle, Julia holding onto the skirt of her sundress.</p>
      <p>"I'll hand Julia back to you," Castle said. "And here's the bakery truck."</p>
      <p>"You said stall," Beckett said, smiling as she followed him over to the short line in front of a small bus.</p>
      <p>"Truck, stall, they still have coffee," Castle said. "You want to keep going?"</p>
      <p>"No, I'll wait," Beckett said. "We should eat, she's probably pretty hungry," she said, glancing down at Julia who nodded at that.</p>
      <p>After grabbing some coffee for himself and Beckett, Castle led her and Julia to another food stall where a man was making crêpes. "Jacques, <em>ça va</em>?" he called to the man inside.</p>
      <p>"Castle, nice to see you again," the cook said, looking up. "Here for the end of summer?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can I get your strawberry chocolate crêpe?" Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Coming right up," the cook said.</p>
      <p>"You're a regular here?" Beckett asked, having watched the exchange with a smile on her face.</p>
      <p>"Me and Alexis," Castle replied. "And there's more strawberries than chocolate in case you're mad at me for ordering without asking."</p>
      <p>"That's fine," Beckett said. She picked up Julia since the little girl was standing on tip-toe, trying to watch the man make their crêpe.</p>
      <p>"Is that what we eat?" Julia asked her mother.</p>
      <p>"They haven't finished cooking it yet," Castle explained. "When it's done they'll put strawberries in it, and some chocolate, you'll really like it."</p>
      <p>Julia nodded, and watched the cook quickly flip the crêpe and finally add the slices of strawberries before drizzling on chocolate. She was set down on the ground and allowed to carry the plate for her mother and Castle as they walked to a group of tables.</p>
      <p>"Here, see if you like it sweetie," Beckett said once they were sitting and she had Julia on her lap. She smiled as the little girl ate the slice of crêpe she'd cut for her and immediately asked for more. "This was a good idea," she commented to Castle as they split up the pastry.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I figured it'd be fun for Julia," Castle said. "Alexis always loved going to the farmer's markets in the city when she was young."</p>
      <p>"We'll have to try and go back in the city," Beckett said as she helped Julia get a strawberry with her fork. "Are you tired of walking Julia?"</p>
      <p>"No, are we gonna see more?" the little girl asked.</p>
      <p>"We are, we only have vegetables and I don't think you want to just eat those for two weeks," Beckett said. She laughed slightly when Julia wrinkled her nose and she kissed the little girl's cheek before sipping her coffee.</p>
      <p>"Was I kidding?" Castle said, watching her.</p>
      <p>"No, this pretty good," Beckett replied. "We'll have to stop by the bakery another morning while we're here."</p>
      <p>"I'll be glad to take you, though I think you might need to watch Julia when she sees their pastries," Castle joked as the little girl was sucking on a slice of strawberry to get the chocolate sauce on it. He laughed as Beckett scolded her gently to eat and said, "It's interesting to see you with her sometimes like this."</p>
      <p>"I can imagine," Beckett said. "But we should probably talk about something else."</p>
      <p>"Right," Castle said. "I think I'm finished, so would you two mind if I got something on my own?"</p>
      <p>"No, go ahead, we'll start walking down the aisle again," Beckett said. She squeezed Castle's hand when he grabbed hers and watched him walk down the aisle until he disappeared.</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia asked softly to get her mother's attention.</p>
      <p>"Oh, ready to go?" Beckett asked. When Julia nodded, she put her down on the ground and gathered their trash before she took her daughter's hand and they walked to the first stall past the food stalls.</p>
      <p>The two walked into a few fruit and vegetable stalls, Beckett buying some items, and helping Julia take pictures before Castle walked up to them, a bag in one hand and a small bouquet of flowers in the other.</p>
      <p>"And this?" Beckett asked as he handed the flowers to her.</p>
      <p>"I always buy one when I come here, for Alexis and my mother when they're with me," Castle said as she handed the bouquet to Julia who sniffed at the large lily in the middle of it. "Now for you and Julia."</p>
      <p>"Thank you, that's sweet of you," Beckett said, smiling at him.</p>
      <p>"Thank you Castle," Julia chirped as she looked up at him. "They're pretty."</p>
      <p>"I'm glad you think so, and you're welcome. Let's keep going," Castle said. He waited for Beckett to start walking before he took her hand and tucked it into his arm as she held Julia's hand with her other. He watched the little girl as she held the flowers tightly to her, skipping again, and felt Beckett squeeze his arm slightly as they watched her sniffing at the blue blooms along the side, knowing that she was hoping too he may have gotten to her a little more with that very simple gesture.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Okay sweetie, you're ready," Beckett said as she straightened Julia's bathing suit. "Are you ready?"</p>
      <p>"I think so Mommy," Julia said as Beckett picked her up. She wrapped her arms tightly around her mother, rubbing her cheek against the terrycloth robe she was wearing over her bikini. "Will you be in the pool with me?" she asked as they went down the stairs.</p>
      <p>"I will, so will Castle," Beckett said, smiling as she reached him standing just inside the door to the back.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, and I do know how to swim too, so don't worry," Castle replied, watching as Beckett set Julia down. "And you'll like swimming."</p>
      <p>"Do I have to go in?" Julia asked worriedly.</p>
      <p>"Well if you want to just stand on the step for right now that's okay," Beckett said as she followed Castle down to the pool. "But I wanted you to learn to swim a little bit, so you can go in the ocean tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said in a small voice. They walked into the pool area and she watched as her mother led her over to one of the chairs by the fireplace and sat down. "What's that?" she asked as Beckett pulled out two bottles.</p>
      <p>"Sunscreen, so your skin doesn't get burned," she replied as she took off the dress she'd put on her daughter as a cover up. She quickly sprayed the sunscreen all over Julia's limbs and neck before she started on her face. "Okay, you're all ready," she said. "Wait for me though." Beckett wasn't too surprised when Julia nodded firmly and she smiled, standing up and pulling off her robe, glancing at Castle. "Sorry to disappoint you," she couldn't help tease him.</p>
      <p>"No, that's alright, this is as nice," Castle said quickly, glancing down her body. "Really nice."</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled slightly at his reaction to her dark blue bikini, and started to cover herself with sunscreen before she picked up the swimming vest that was on the table with the bottles. She helped Julia put it on before buckling it and checking to make sure it was secure. "Not too tight?" she asked the little girl.</p>
      <p>"No Mommy," Julia said, sounding nervous.</p>
      <p>"Okay, then let's try out the water," Beckett said, kissing her forehead tenderly before she stood. She watched as Castle jumped into the pool at the other end and looked down at Julia, seeing her eyes were wide. "If you learn how to swim, you could do that when you're a little older," she told her to try and get her to want to swim.</p>
      <p>Julia didn't say anything, but clung tightly to Beckett's hand as she stepped down into the water. She hopped down onto the step next to her, and kicked a little with her right foot before Beckett started to go down the next step. She whimpered a little and hugged her mother around the waist tightly.</p>
      <p>"It's okay," Beckett said quickly. "You can stay there, I'm just going to get in all the way okay?" When Julia finally nodded she went the rest of the way into the water and said, "Come here sweetie, I'll hold you."</p>
      <p>Looking around the water, seeing Castle swimming up towards them, Julia held her arms out to Beckett and let her take her. She was clinging to her neck, watching to see where they were going.</p>
      <p>"See, it's okay," Beckett said gently, kissing her temple. "And remember, your vest helps you float."</p>
      <p>"She okay?" Castle asked, walking up to them.</p>
      <p>"I think she needs to warm up to the idea," Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, I want to go back on the step," Julia whispered.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said easily, turning and taking her over to the top step. "Can Castle watch you for a little? I want to swim, that way you can see how I do it okay?" When Julia nodded slowly, she waited for him to sit down on the step next to the little girl before she went out further into the pool and ducked under the water.</p>
      <p>"Mommy!" Julia cried out, almost jumping into the water if Castle hadn't caught her.</p>
      <p>"She's okay Julia," Castle said, a little shocked at her reaction.</p>
      <p>"Julia, I'm fine," Beckett said when she resurfaced, having heard her daughter's scream under the water, though muffled. "I know how to swim." She saw though that Julia was shaking a little and she hurriedly swam back over to her. "Come here," she said, taking her from Castle and sitting on the top step. "I guess I should have waited a little more before I did that," she said to him.</p>
      <p>"I don't think either one of us was expecting that reaction," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I should have," Beckett sighed. "Okay, Julia, why don't I take you in the water with me again, teach you a little how to swim?" she said. "I want you to learn, that way you won't get scared so much."</p>
      <p>"Are you going to let me go?" Julia asked nervously.</p>
      <p>"I won't," Beckett said as she stood up and then walked into the water to the middle of the pool where the water came up to the middle of her torso. She wasn't surprised when Julia's breathing quickened and her arms wrapped around her tightly. "It's okay," she murmured gently to her. "I'm going to duck down a little, but just to my chin Julia, and I won't let you go," she told her.</p>
      <p>"No, please Mommy," Julia said, tightening her grip around her neck.</p>
      <p>"Okay, I won't," Beckett said, looking at Castle who was standing next to them.</p>
      <p>"Hey Julia," he said at Beckett's glance. "You had fun yesterday when we went in the water right?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I don't wanna go under," Julia said.</p>
      <p>Breathing out, as she realized what was scaring her daughter, Beckett said, "Then no one's going to make you go underneath, but we just want you to swim a little bit okay?"</p>
      <p>"But I won't go under?" Julia asked. When Beckett shook her head no she whispered, "What do I do?"</p>
      <p>"First, let go of me," Beckett said. "I promise I won't let you go, I just want you to try the vest you're wearing out."</p>
      <p>Julia looked up at her mother, who kissed her forehead, and said, "Kay," before she let her go, feeling Beckett's hands holding her. She started to kick her legs in a panic, splashing with her arms and trying to grab her mother tightly.</p>
      <p>"It's alright, I have you Julia," Beckett said quickly. "Take it easy." She was relieved when the little girl stopped splashing, but she could feel her still kicking her legs furiously.</p>
      <p>"Looks like you might be a good swimmer," Castle said to her. When she looked at him he said, "Your legs are moving like a pro's."</p>
      <p>"I think that's enough for right now," Beckett said, smiling as Julia looked confused. She walked back to the steps and set Julia down on the first one before sitting next to her. "Want to take this off?" she asked, pulling down the little girl's vest.</p>
      <p>"No, c-can I go on the next step?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said, taking her down the next step before she put Julia on her lap. She watched as her daughter started to move her hand back and forth in the water, not saying a word as she hoped her actions meant she was starting to get used to the pool.</p>
      <p>Watching the refraction of the sun on the water, Julia started to squeeze her hands closed on the very surface of the water. She giggled in surprised delight as the water squirted out of her hands, and she did it a second time, splashing Castle who was walking up to them. "Sorry," she said quickly, the smile dropping off her face.</p>
      <p>"That's alright, that wasn't too bad actually," Castle said. "You've got good aim it looks like."</p>
      <p>"Want to try again sweetie?" Beckett asked carefully, not wanting to pressure the little girl. When Julia nodded slowly she stood up with her and took her down onto the last step before the bottom of the pool. "Okay?" she asked before Julia nodded and she stepped down further before turning to her daughter. "Want to come in all the way?" she said after waiting for a minute to let her get used to it.</p>
      <p>Wriggling her toes on the very edge of the step, Julia suddenly jumped at her mother, who was lucky to react quickly enough to catch her and pick her up. She giggled softly at Beckett's surprised expression and said, "Was that good?"</p>
      <p>"Scared me," Castle said as Beckett nodded and kissed Julia's forehead. He watched as Beckett carefully held the little girl's hands and let her float a little.</p>
      <p>"Easy, don't kick your legs so hard that you get tired," Beckett warned her as Julia was kicking her legs frantically. "And remember, you can float." She then grabbed Julia around the middle and said, "Move your arms too. Wait! Not that hard, I'm holding you!" she suddenly cried out when the little girl splashed so hard the water was flying around, hitting her and Castle.</p>
      <p>"I told you she'd be a pro," he laughed as Beckett held her against her hip then.</p>
      <p>"I know, I should take her somewhere to learn," Beckett said, wiping her face off as best she could though her hand was already wet. "But that was really good sweetie. What do you think, want to swim more?"</p>
      <p>Julia nodded eagerly and was surprised when her mother went further into the pool. "Mommy?" she asked as Beckett went to the middle of the water.</p>
      <p>"Mind if I take you Julia?" Castle said suddenly. He smiled when the two looked at him with wide eyes and said, "Just to take you back to the steps."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, reaching out to him. She held onto him tightly and watched as her mother dove underneath the water again. She started to open her mouth, but Beckett soon resurfaced at the steps, turning to her. She quickly leaned over as soon as Castle was close enough, and wrapped her arms around her mother's neck, hugging her tightly. "Is it scary?" she whispered.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said, knowing what she was asking. "How about we take a little break?" she asked Julia. "Relax for a little bit." She carried her daughter out of the pool, and walked to the chairs in front of the fireplace, sitting down with Julia on her lap. "That wasn't too bad was it?"</p>
      <p>Shaking her head, Julia yawned slightly and leaned against Beckett as she off her vest and then wrapped a towel around her.</p>
      <p>"I think," Beckett said as she gave the vest to Castle who set it aside and sat in the chair across from them with a towel around his shoulders. "That you need a nap."</p>
      <p>"I don't, I can stay up," Julia sighed, rubbing her cheek while her mother dried her hair.</p>
      <p>"Well, why don't we just lie down in your bed and see how you feel about a quick cat nap?" Beckett asked, standing up and setting Julia on the edge of the chair. She dried herself off as fast as she could before she wrapped her towel around her waist and then picked Julia up. "I'll be back," she told Castle.</p>
      <p>"I'll come in," he said, getting up quickly and following her back to the house. He hung back as she went up the stairs, disappearing down the hall, and then went to the kitchen to rummage in a drawer, looking for something.</p>
      <p>Beckett left the room Julia was using ten minutes later, closing the door slightly behind her, relived that her daughter had fallen asleep. She went down the stairs, holding on to the towel around her as she saw that Castle was at the bottom of the staircase. "She's asleep," she said. "Took a while, she always does that."</p>
      <p>"Kids this age prefer to stay awake," Castle said, holding up her robe. He held it open as Beckett took off the towel and then slid her arms through it. As she was closing it he bent his head and kissed her shoulder before going up to her neck, pushing her hair out of the way.</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said with a smile as she slipped out of his hold. "Better we move this to another room though."</p>
      <p>"Right," Castle said, taking her hand and leading her into the family room where he sat with her on the couch. "While you were getting Julia to sleep, I had an idea for dinner," he told her, picking up the pamphlet he'd gotten from the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"<em>The White Narrows</em>? Not very nautical," Beckett read, seeing it was for a restaurant.</p>
      <p>"No, but they make up for it with the décor, and also the fact it's on the water," Castle said. "I can call and make a reservation for us tonight."</p>
      <p>"I was thinking," Beckett said. "Maybe we should stay in again for dinner instead?"</p>
      <p>"Sure, what did you have in mind," Castle said as Beckett put her legs up on the couch, over his lap.</p>
      <p>"We could just get some pizza and watch movies with Julia," Beckett said. "And once she's in bed later tonight watch something ourselves."</p>
      <p>"Who's choosing the movie this time?" Castle asked, running the backs of his fingers up and down her right leg.</p>
      <p>"Both of us," Beckett said quickly. She smiled when Castle nodded and said, "If we can decide."</p>
      <p>"We've done that before," he said quickly.</p>
      <p>"Not without a lot of discussion," Beckett teased him. "But you're sure it's okay we don't go to that restaurant tonight?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, that's fine, actually, might be harder to get a reservation on such short notice," Castle said, looking at the pamphlet.</p>
      <p>"What if we went for lunch tomorrow?" Beckett asked. "Did you have any plans?"</p>
      <p>"Not really, did you still want to head down to the beach?" Castle asked her. When she nodded he said, "Then let me give them a call right now, make sure we can get a good table."</p>
      <p>Beckett watched him go, and she smiled as she soon heard him talking on the phone in the kitchen. It only took him a few minutes before he came back, carrying two glasses of water. "Thanks, were you able to get us a table?" she asked, taking one from him.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, they don't usually get requests for lunch," Castle said. "So it'll be their best table. Tell Julia to bring her camera."</p>
      <p>"I will," Beckett said, smiling.</p>
      <p>"Speaking of your daughter, any idea why she was so scared?" Castle asked as she put her legs over his lap again once he was sitting next to her.</p>
      <p>"I think it's because they had a safety day at her camp back in July," Beckett said. "And they talked about safety tips to not drown while swimming. I didn't have a chance to take her to a pool before that, or talk to her myself about it, so she was terrified at the idea. I'm just surprised she reacted that way when I went under the water."</p>
      <p>"She jumped off the steps after you," Castle told her. "I caught her… which I just remembered I didn't need to do since she had the vest on."</p>
      <p>"No, better you did," Beckett said quickly. "She would never have gone into the pool again. I was wondering why you were holding her. But you notice she trusts you more now."</p>
      <p>"I do, hopefully she'll keep on doing that," Castle said. He looked down at her legs then, his hand sliding up to her knee when she quickly stopped him.</p>
      <p>"Julia's only taking a nap, she might wake up and come down here before I want to get her up," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Right, sorry," Castle said, quickly moving his hand back down. "So once she's up, it's still early, what did you want to do?"</p>
      <p>"The wind is moving pretty well," Beckett said, glancing outside. "And Julia insisted that I pack the kite I bought her, so we could try flying it here with her."</p>
      <p>"You bought her a kite?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"We went to Central Park one day, to go to a playground, and she saw some people flying kites," Beckett said. "So I bought one for her and we've gone to parks a couple times, flying it. Which reminds me," she said suddenly. "Since we're talking about Julia; why don't you like <em>Sgt. Pepper</em> as much as the <em>White Album</em>?"</p>
      <p>"What made you think of that?" Castle said in surprise before a look of realization appeared on his face.</p>
      <p>"<em>Being For the Benefit of Mr. Kite</em>," Beckett said at the same time as him. She smiled when he shook his head and said, "Yeah, it reminded me of that. But really Castle, that's their best album. I'm not saying the <em>White Album</em> isn't good, but for music…"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, you're right, but I think, songs like <em>Helter Skelter</em>; again; <em>While My Guitar Gently Weeps</em>, definitely <em>Dear Prudence</em>, they're some of the band's best," Castle said. "You don't have any songs you really like from there?"</p>
      <p>"<em>Back in the U.S.S.R</em>, hands down," Beckett said. She smiled as Castle did as well and said, "That's a favorite of Julia's too."</p>
      <p>"Does she know the song <em>Julia</em>?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"She does and she likes it, but she knows it's not about her," Beckett said. "Her absolute favorite is <em>Honey Pie</em>. So what about <em>Sgt. Pepper</em>, you said you like that album too."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I like all their songs. Paul's are really good stories," Castle said. "So I definitely enjoy his. <em>A Day in the Life</em> is a great one. Really, their albums are all great, it's hard to pick one that's the best," he said.</p>
      <p>"I'll agree," Beckett said. "And I think we should finish up with <em>A Hard Day's Night</em>."</p>
      <p>"Have you shown her <em>Help!</em>" Castle asked. When Beckett shook her head no, putting her glass down on the coffee table he said, "Should show her that one too."</p>
      <p>"There wasn't much left for <em>A Hard Day's Night</em>, so we can work that in too," Beckett said, sitting up and sliding over to him. She wrapped her arms around him as he quickly responded, and kissed him lightly on the lips before pulling away slightly. She wasn't too shocked when he grabbed her tightly, pulling her against him as their lips crushed together. She slid her hands over his shoulders, covered by his robe, and reached up to cup the back of his head. She pulled away a little to breathe and looked into his eyes saying, "Trying to make up for stopping you before."</p>
      <p>"You don't need to, but I'm enjoying this just the same," Castle said before he pulled her back to him and kissed her deeply as she held onto the back of his neck. When they needed to breathe, he pulled away and went down to her neck, kissing at it a little hungrily as he carefully pulled her hair out of the way.</p>
      <p>Tilting her head back slightly, Beckett closed her eyes tightly for a moment before she realized that she had seen something blue in the doorway that shouldn't be on the white walls. She looked over and saw that Julia was standing there, her left eye peeking out and looking at them. "Castle," she said quickly, stopping him as she tensed up. "Sweetie," she said, getting off the couch quickly and hurrying to her daughter. "How was your nap?"</p>
      <p>"I'm cold Mommy," Julia shivered, pulling the blanket her mother had covered her with tighter around her.</p>
      <p>"Okay, well why don't I give you a bath and get you changed," Beckett said, picking her up. "And after Castle and I want to help you fly your kite."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said eagerly as her mother started up the stairs. She looked behind her and saw that Castle was coming up after them.</p>
      <p>"I'll take a quick shower too, meet you outside," Castle said as Beckett turned to him.</p>
      <p>"Actually, I need you to watch her while I'm taking a shower," she said to him. "She can show you the kite and you can get it set up for us."</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle said, smiling as Julia leaned her head against Beckett's. "Your mom told me you like to fly it; you should do pretty well here, the wind is excellent."</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled as Julia did so slightly, and she reached out to squeeze Castle's arm before turning to go to Julia's room. She knew Julia was slowly warming up to him, and she couldn't be happier, wondering how the next twelve days would go now her daughter was gradually emerging from her shell.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Watch out for the tree!" Castle was saying as he held Julia's hands on the spool of string for her kite. He watched as the butterfly shaped kite arced and then landed on some branches. "So close," he said as Julia giggled and followed him to get it down.</p>
      <p>"Good grief Charlie Brown," a voice said behind the two as Castle was able to get the kite down. Beckett smiled as they looked at her in surprise and Julia dropped her spool of string, running to her. "So how is the wind?" she asked her daughter after hugging her tightly.</p>
      <p>"It's fun Mommy, the kite went up high," Julia said excitedly. "Can I show you?"</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said, watching as Castle wound the string. "Who do you want to help you?"</p>
      <p>"Can, can C-Castle help me?" Julia asked softly.</p>
      <p>"Yes he can," Beckett said, sharing a look with him before she took the kite. She smiled as she watched Castle put his hands on Julia's on the handles on the string and she threw the kite up in the air before getting out of the way as it started to fall before a gust of wind picked it up. She walked back to them, watching the kite fly higher and higher and said, "Don't lose that kite Castle."</p>
      <p>"I won't," he said, helping Julia unspool more string as fast as they could go. "Okay, I think that's high enough, otherwise the wind's gonna blow you away and your mom is going to be so mad at me." He smiled as the little girl laughed, and then held her hands tightly as the wind jerked the kite a little.</p>
      <p>Beckett watched the kite come down a few minutes later, on the beach, and she went over to Julia as Castle ran to get it. "Was that fun?" she asked her daughter as she took the spool from her and wound it up while he walked back to them.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can we do it again?" Julia begged.</p>
      <p>"It's almost dinnertime," Beckett said. "Maybe another day, maybe you could fly it when Alexis is here."</p>
      <p>"Can I?" Julia asked with wide eyes.</p>
      <p>"Of course, we never really flew kites when she was little, so I'm sure you could teach her how," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Then we'll leave the kite out to remind you," Beckett said to Julia as they walked back inside. "So we're going to have pizza tonight sweetie, what would you like on yours?"</p>
      <p>"Cheese," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Extra cheese and you want pepperoni?" Castle asked Beckett.</p>
      <p>Nodding, Beckett took Julia with her to the kitchen after him, and they got some plates before going to the family room where she sat on the couch, watching her daughter play with her Stitch doll.</p>
      <p>After the pizzas were delivered, Castle sat down with Beckett and Julia and they began to eat, watching the rest of the movie from the night before. Once it was finished, they started watching <em>Help!</em> and its opening made Beckett turn to Castle in concern.</p>
      <p>"It's okay," he said quickly to her look. "I watched this one, nothing bad."</p>
      <p>"Still, sacrifice?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"It's just a running joke, nothing macabre," Castle said as The Beatles appeared, singing the title song.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, why is the man throwing darts at them?" Julia asked, sitting on the floor in front of Beckett and Castle.</p>
      <p>"He wants the ring Ringo's wearing," Beckett replied. "And- right in Paul's leg," she laughed as one of the darts hit the screen.</p>
      <p>"Good aim," Castle said. "She'll like this, don't worry."</p>
      <p>"As long as it has The Beatles in it, especially Paul, I'm sure she will," Beckett said with a smile.</p>
      <p>Julia wouldn't be moved from the floor once The Beatles appeared on the screen in color; their performance having been in black and white; and it wasn't until the movie had finished entirely that she let her mother pick her up to take her upstairs. "Oh Mommy that was funny," she said, grabbing Beckett's hair. "Can we watch it again? I want to see Paul shrinking on the floor again."</p>
      <p>"I know, that was funny," Beckett said, smiling as Julia giggled a little wildly. "But another day, we have a lot we're going to get to do okay?"</p>
      <p>Nodding, Julia bounced on the bed slightly and said, "Are you happy we came here Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"I am, are you having fun?" Beckett asked as she changed her into her pajamas.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Mommy?" Julia asked before her mother put her shirt over her head.</p>
      <p>"What is it sweetie?" Beckett said absently as she finished dressing her and had Julia get under the bed sheet.</p>
      <p>"I like it here," Julia said. "Castle's nice to me," she said in a tiny voice.</p>
      <p>"He is, to me too. I'm glad you think that though," Beckett said, smiling widely, leaning down and kissing her forehead tenderly. "But you need to get some sleep Julia, we're going to the beach tomorrow and I want you to get as much rest as you can."</p>
      <p>"Night Mommy," Julia said, hugging her with one arm as Beckett leaned down and hugged her back. She shared a kiss with her mother before she wrapped her arms around her doll, and rolled over onto her side.</p>
      <p>Standing up, Beckett walked to the doorway and turned off the light before she left, closing the door behind her. She took a few steps towards the stairs, and jumped when a hand grabbed her elbow from behind. "Castle, really? In the shadows?" she said, shaking her head.</p>
      <p>"Sorry," Castle said. "Wanted to watch you put her to sleep, it's sweet to watch, wasn't expecting a conversation I wasn't supposed to hear though."</p>
      <p>"Neither was I," Beckett said as they went down the stairs. "But I think after two weeks she's going to be used to you hanging around me."</p>
      <p>"Hanging around you? After what she saw us doing earlier?" Castle joked as they went back to the couch in the family room and sat together.</p>
      <p>"Maybe that's not the best way to phrase our relationship, so sue me," Beckett said with a shrug, smiling at him before they started to laugh at almost the same time.</p>
      <p>"Okay, so what do you want to watch?" Castle asked when they had calmed down.</p>
      <p>"Something that won't insult my intelligence," Beckett said as he picked up the remote.</p>
      <p>"How about a docudrama?" Castle said, looking at the genres of movies on Netflix.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said. She looked with him at the list which he scrolled down, and then said, "Wait, what about that one? <em>Good Night, and Good Luck</em>?"</p>
      <p>"It's by George Clooney," Castle read off the screen. "And it's about Edward R. Murrow and McCarthy and the Communism threat."</p>
      <p>"Sounds good, my grandfather used to talk about him. He listened to him all the time he used to tell me, that was his sign off at the end of each broadcast actually," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Seems like a good movie, have you seen it?" Castle asked, selecting it on the screen.</p>
      <p>"No, you?" Beckett asked as she picked up the cup of coffee that was on the table he'd made for her.</p>
      <p>"I remember the name," Castle said, sitting back with his coffee. "But not much besides that."</p>
      <p>The movie soon started after the studio names were shown, and Castle and Beckett found themselves paying close attention to it after the first few minutes; enthralled by the plot. They were a little disconcerted by two of the characters, who were married, and trying to hide it from their co-workers, but besides that they enjoyed the film. It wasn't until it finished that they shook themselves and went upstairs to go to bed as it was almost midnight.</p>
      <p>"That was a pretty amazing movie," Beckett commented, sitting on the bed in her pajamas as she was looking at Castle's tablet. "It says here that McCarthy's list of names kept fluctuating in numbers."</p>
      <p>"Hopefully people stopped believing him," Castle said, coming out and getting on the bed. "You know, it's a little scary how many times that happens in history. People being accused without any real proof, and persecuted."</p>
      <p>"True, the Salem Witchcraft Trials, McCarthy and then everything now with terrorism," Beckett said, setting aside the tablet after she'd turned it off. "But that movie did an amazing job showing how stupid some people can get, wrapped up in hysteria over an idea that's not really there."</p>
      <p>Castle watched as she slid underneath the bed sheet and he followed her saying, "That was fun though."</p>
      <p>"It was, the whole day was," Beckett said as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed against his side. "I keep wondering though how the next twelve days will go."</p>
      <p>"We should take Julia to the pool again; see if we can't get her used to it. At least to the point where she'll want to go in and not be coaxed into it," Castle commented, running his hand over her hair.</p>
      <p>"Maybe when Alexis gets here she'll help Julia," Beckett said. "I had the idea that maybe seeing a friend enjoying the pool would help her overcome her fear more."</p>
      <p>"Worth a shot," Castle said before she nudged him in the side. "What?" he said laughingly as he looked at her and saw the expression on her face.</p>
      <p>"Thank you for the vote of confidence," Beckett said before a smile broke out across her lips. "I better get some sleep; I get the feeling Julia's going to be really energetic tomorrow at the beach. Let's hope she'll be okay going in the water."</p>
      <p>"Probably," Castle said before he shared a kiss with her. He couldn't stop himself from lingering, as Beckett did the same, and when they pulled apart he stared into her eyes.</p>
      <p>"Goodnight," Beckett said softly, cupping his cheek with her hand.</p>
      <p>"Night," Castle said simply before she pressed her cheek to his shoulder. He held her as he listened to her breathing becoming more even, and then eventually deeper. He rubbed his cheek slightly against her, getting comfortable before he closed his eyes, falling asleep more quickly than he thought he would.</p>
      <p>It felt as if he had just closed his eyes when Castle was jolted awake by the sound of sniffing and whimpering and his eyes shot open. He looked to his right and saw that it was Julia, and he could see in the moonlight that her cheeks were shining; damp from tears. "Oh, hey sweetie… Julia," he corrected himself quickly as he pushed himself up on his side to reach out to her. "What's wrong?"</p>
      <p>"I want my mommy," Julia sobbed softly.</p>
      <p>"Did you have a nightmare?" Castle asked, trying to wake himself up enough to focus his attention fully on her. When the little girl nodded he said, "She's right here, let me help you up," as he reached out to her and picked her up.</p>
      <p>"Julia?" Beckett said, raising her head to see her daughter climbing on the bed. "Come here," she said, holding her arms out to her as she sat up.</p>
      <p>As Julia scrambled over him to her mother, Castle suddenly groaned and lay back, holding his abdomen after her knee hit him.</p>
      <p>"Are you okay?" Beckett asked as she held Julia against her.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, she just got my stomach there," Castle said as he sat up, watching them.</p>
      <p>"Sorry about that," Beckett said, trying not to laugh at the noise he'd made. She shook that off and turned to her daughter, stroking her hair. "What did you see in your dream sweetie?" she asked her.</p>
      <p>"It was black, I was all alone," Julia cried, pressing her cheek against Beckett's side. "I was saying your name but you didn't come Mommy."</p>
      <p>"It's alright, it was just a dream," Beckett said, kissing the top of her head. "I'm here okay? Why don't I take you back-"</p>
      <p>"Actually," Castle interrupted her. "Why don't you just let her sleep here with us?"</p>
      <p>"Are you sure?" Beckett asked in surprise.</p>
      <p>"She probably won't be able to sleep without you after that dream," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Come on Julia, you need to get some sleep," Beckett said, squeezing his arm in thanks before she turned her attention to her daughter. She helped Julia under the sheet and waited for her to curl against her side before she stroked her hair gently, watching as the little girl quickly fell asleep. "Sorry about her waking you up," she whispered to Castle, turning to him.</p>
      <p>"It's okay, it was weird, I called her sweetie when I saw her," he replied.</p>
      <p>"You've heard me call her that too many times it looks like," Beckett said, smiling as she kissed his cheek. "Thank you though."</p>
      <p>"It's not a problem, I know how important she is to you Kate," Castle said, kissing her temple. He wasn't too surprised when she kissed him, and he took her lips gently before they parted and he watched her as she kept on stroking Julia's hair before he said, "Last time we were like this things were a lot different."</p>
      <p>"I know," Beckett said with a slight smile. "I wasn't a mother then."</p>
      <p>"But I was right what I told you then, you definitely make a beautiful mother," Castle said quickly.</p>
      <p>"Goodnight Castle," Beckett said, kissing his cheek as he was lying on his side, hearing him murmur the same to her, his lips brushing against hers. She pulled Julia closer to her, and closed her eyes, feeling her daughter's body cuddling against her tightly, and Castle's arm around her holding her to him securely, the sensation lulling her into sleep easily once more.</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Sitting In The Moonlight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter is a lyric from the song Gone Troppo by George Harrison from his album by the same name.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>Walking into <em>The White Narrows</em> restaurant, Castle glanced around the bar as he walked up to the hostess and gave his name for the reservation he'd made the afternoon before. As he was walking back to the door to wait for Beckett and Julia, he heard his name being called and turned, seeing Chief Brady walking towards him. "Chief, how are you doing?" he asked the man as they shook hands.</p>
      <p>"Pretty well, just wrapping up a disturbance charge from last night at the bar," the chief said, gesturing behind him. "Here with your family?"</p>
      <p>Before he could answer that, Castle felt someone grabbing his leg, and he looked down to see it was Julia, giggling up at him before she glanced at the Chief and hid behind him a little. "Hey Julia, this is Chief Brady," he told her as he touched her shoulder. "Your mom and I worked with him the first time I brought her here."</p>
      <p>"Sorry for taking so long Castle, I found my glasses though… Chief, great to see you again," Beckett said as she walked up to them and then noticed him. She shook his hand as Julia wrapped her arms around her and she said, "This is Julia, in case Castle didn't tell you."</p>
      <p>"He mentioned her name, is she your daughter?" the chief asked, looking a little startled.</p>
      <p>"She is," Beckett said when the hostess came over to them, saying their table was ready. "I'll take Julia," she said to Castle. "It was nice to see you again Chief Brady," she said before she followed the woman, Julia holding her hand tightly.</p>
      <p>"You… Julia, is she…" the chief said slowly.</p>
      <p>"Is her daughter, she adopted her after investigating the murder of Julia's mother," Castle said. "Did you hear at all about them being kidnapped?"</p>
      <p>"Oh, I did, they were taken by that human trafficking group weren't they?" Chief Brady said in realization.</p>
      <p>"They were," Castle said. "And I hope you don't mind me joining them for lunch."</p>
      <p>"No, it was good to see you again Castle," the chief said, shaking his hand once more before leaving.</p>
      <p>"Funny coincidence seeing him," Beckett said, smiling up at Castle as he sat across the table from her and Julia. "Why was he here?"</p>
      <p>"Apparently some kind of disturbance at the bar last night," Castle replied. "Did I pick a good table?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, you delivered on that definitely," Beckett said with a smile as she watched Julia taking a picture of the ocean outside. "And now you see what he meant by the restaurant being on the ocean sweetie," she told her daughter as she made her put down her camera gently.</p>
      <p>"Now you know I didn't mean we would have to go underneath the water," Castle said to Julia.</p>
      <p>"We won't sink Mommy?" Julia asked her.</p>
      <p>"No, I promise you we won't," Beckett said, rubbing her back. "Sit down though," she said since her daughter was sitting up on her knees. "I need you to tell me what you want to eat."</p>
      <p>After they had picked out drinks and their food, Castle said to Julia, "Are you excited to go to the beach?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said eagerly. "Can I get more shells Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"You can, but don't get too many, you only have so much space in your room," Beckett said with a smile as the little girl looked down at her camera. "But are you going to be okay going in the water today?"</p>
      <p>"Will I wear my vest?" Julia asked, peering up at her.</p>
      <p>"You will," Beckett assured her as she stroked her hair. "And you won't be going deeper than your knees alone."</p>
      <p>"Kay, Mommy, look at the boat!" Julia gasped; almost standing on her chair before her mother quickly grabbed her and stopped her.</p>
      <p>"That's an old fashioned schooner," Castle said as they watched the boat slowly sail past. "Woman who owns it is on the board at the yacht club. I've met her at some parties."</p>
      <p>"It looks like it's a hundred years old," Beckett said as Julia took a picture of it.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, she had it redesigned to look that way. Turned some heads at the yacht club," Castle said, looking thoughtful. "Doesn't make sense though, it's a beautiful ship."</p>
      <p>"She is," Beckett said. "But maybe it's desecration to make a modern ship look like that."</p>
      <p>"Possibly," Castle said. "Think she'd want to go on a ship while we're here?"</p>
      <p>"I don't know," Beckett said, hesitating for a moment as she looked at her daughter. "Maybe we should wait and see if she gets more comfortable with the pool and ocean."</p>
      <p>"Sure, but if you want to take her out one day, I can easily make a couple phone calls," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I'm not surprised," Beckett said before she looked down at Julia who was tugging on her dress. "That's a great picture sweetie," she said. "But put away the camera, your food is here and you need to eat. You did say you were hungry right?"</p>
      <p>Julia nodded her head as she let Beckett take her camera and put it aside as their food was served. When she started to eat her linguine she whispered to her mother, "Can we watch the show tonight?"</p>
      <p>"Oh," Beckett said, quickly realizing what she was talking about. "That depends."</p>
      <p>"Depends on what, and what show is she talking about?" Castle asked, having been listening to them.</p>
      <p>"Julia loves <em>Dancing With the Stars</em>," Beckett explained. "And tonight is the semifinals and she wants to watch since her favorite pro is still on with his partner."</p>
      <p>"Who's your favorite?" Castle asked Julia.</p>
      <p>"Derek," Julia replied shyly.</p>
      <p>"Doesn't surprise me," Castle said. "So what depends on her watching the show tonight?"</p>
      <p>"You, would you mind if we watched it?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"Of course not," Castle said. "Would you mind if I watched with you Julia?" he then said, turning to her.</p>
      <p>Julia shook her head no and turned back to her food as she said, "And can we vote Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"Of course, we always do," Beckett gently reminded her.</p>
      <p>"You watch it too?" Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said, giving him a quick look before he nodded slightly. "And we're excited for tonight right?" she asked her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I hope Derek wins," Julia said worriedly. "Will he?"</p>
      <p>"That depends on Veronica," Beckett said. "But eat Julia; we still have a long time before we can watch the show okay?"</p>
      <p>"How long?" Julia asked as Beckett took her fork and got some noodles on it.</p>
      <p>"About eight hours," Beckett said. "And you'll need to take a nap today too because it's going to be past your bedtime by the time the show finishes." She was able to stop any protests that Julia might have by feeding her, and she leaned over, kissing her daughter on the top of the head.</p>
      <p>"Seems like you have a routine when the show's on," Castle commented as Beckett returned to her food.</p>
      <p>"It helps," Beckett replied. "But thank you for letting us watch it, with those past three cases I couldn't be there every single Monday and Tuesday night for the past eight weeks."</p>
      <p>"It's not a problem, actually I'm interested to see how she is watching it," Castle said. "Especially since she loves dancing so much."</p>
      <p>"It's an experience," Beckett said with a smile. "When I was off for two weeks a few months ago, remember Julia, I couldn't remember all the dances. Remember what we did?" she said to try and draw the little girl into the conversation.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, me and Mommy watched all the dances, lots," Julia said in excitement, bouncing a little in her seat.</p>
      <p>"Okay, now I'm really wondering how she's going to be tonight," Castle said, smiling as Beckett laughingly settled her down.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, we had a <em>Dancing With the Stars</em> marathon," Beckett said with a smile. "We got wrapped up in some blankets and sat on the couch for hours."</p>
      <p>"Sounds like it was fun," Castle said, watching her as she looked over at Julia. He knew she was remembering doing the same with her mother as a little girl, and he smiled when Beckett looked at him.</p>
      <p>"So, how's your food," Beckett said, a little taken aback by the expression on his face.</p>
      <p>"It's good," Castle said, not meaning to make his voice a little huskier than normal but having no control over it. He had felt a sudden rush watching her looking at her daughter, no different than what he felt watching her at work. He turned his attention back to his salmon, trying to control himself and remembering they weren't exactly alone before he said to her, "How's yours?"</p>
      <p>"Good," Beckett said with a slight smile since there had been a few minutes in between his response and question. She knew what he was going through, they'd both had to watch when that happened to them while they were with their co-workers, and she knew it was difficult. But as he looked up at her again she saw from the look in his eyes that he was under control and she said, "Thank you for the reservations."</p>
      <p>"Wanted to bring you here last time but we never made it," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Why?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Well, we were a little busy helping the chief, the man Castle was talking to when you came in remember?" Beckett told her, wiping the little girl's mouth clean. "And we didn't have much time for a restaurant."</p>
      <p>"We had an interesting dinner though," Castle said, smiling as Beckett rolled her eyes as she took a sip of her wine. "Come on, admit it."</p>
      <p>"As short as it was," Beckett said. "But at least you didn't provoke him any further."</p>
      <p>"No, as much as I did was more than enough, believe me," Castle said, his eyes wide as he looked at Julia who giggled.</p>
      <p>Beckett turned the conversation away from their previous visit and to Julia, encouraging her to talk to Castle about the show they would be watching that night. She smiled as her daughter eagerly told him about all the dances and was pleased to see the change in her daughter. She remembered that morning, and when Castle had made breakfast for them, making pancakes with Julia's help. She was also happy to see him making such an effort to become closer with her daughter, he could have very easily broken up with her or ignored Julia when she adopted her; but he hadn't. She knew he would never consider that, and it was why she was so worried about Julia at least accepting him in their lives. She was a little lost in thought until they finished their meal, walking out ahead of Castle with her daughter to wait for him at the car. "Was that fun sweetie?" she asked Julia.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can we go?" Julia asked as she hopped on the white line of the parking space.</p>
      <p>"Now we can," Beckett said as she saw Castle coming up to them. "In the car sweetie," she said after he had unlocked the doors for her. She quickly got Julia set in her car seat, and closed the door to find him standing next to her. "Doing better?" she commented with a smile as they walked around the car.</p>
      <p>"You noticed that?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Hard not to," Beckett replied. "But why?"</p>
      <p>"Just watching the way you are with Julia," Castle explained. "I've told you it's pretty sweet. And a side of you I do like seeing I think I told you that before."</p>
      <p>"You did," Beckett said. She kissed him on the lips then as he opened the passenger side door, and smiled when he looked slightly shocked at that before she got into the car.</p>
      <p>Shaking himself, Castle hurried around the car, glancing at Julia as he did so. He wasn't too surprised the little girl was watching him, but she had a tiny smile on her face. He had to wonder if she was alright with them showing affection in front of her, but decided to let Beckett decide for them. "Okay, so we're still on <em>Gone Troppo</em>?" he asked as he started the car and music immediately started to play.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, look!" Julia said as they were stopped at a light, pointing out at a poster hanging from the front of a movie theater.</p>
      <p>"Almost forgot about that," Castle said as he went through the intersection. "That's for the end of summer fair they have every year. Kind of a send off for the summer residents and tourists."</p>
      <p>"It'll be in five days," Beckett said. "You want to go see it Julia?"</p>
      <p>"Can we? Please?" Julia begged, drawing out the e as long as she could.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle laughed. "You'll like it," he told her. "They have animals and a lot of games where you can win a toy. You want to go?" he then directed at Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Of course," she replied. "It'll be fun for her. But you know you don't have to always do stuff with us, we're your guests. We can go by ourselves."</p>
      <p>"I wouldn't have mentioned it if I didn't want to go," Castle said with a shrug. "The thing is do you want me to go with you? Don't want to cut in on your mother-daughter time."</p>
      <p>"We've had a lot of that," Beckett said, squeezing his arm. "I don't mind you tagging along with us."</p>
      <p>"Okay, so either we're dating or I'm running after you like a twelve year old with his first crush," Castle said. "The way you describe our relationship."</p>
      <p>"Either way," Beckett said before he looked at her in confusion and she laughed softly. When they reached the house she got Julia out, and as she carried her inside felt the little girl shaking her by the shoulder. "What is it?" she asked as she went up the stairs.</p>
      <p>"What's dating mean Mommy?" Julia asked as Beckett stopped at the top of the stairs.</p>
      <p>Glancing at Castle who was behind them, Beckett took a moment to think before she said, "That's when two adults, who think they might like each other spend time together."</p>
      <p>"Oh," Julia said as her mother carried her into her room then. "So you like Castle a lot Mommy."</p>
      <p>"I do," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Does Castle like you the same?" Julia said.</p>
      <p>"You better believe I do!" Castle yelled down the hall.</p>
      <p>Smiling as Julia giggled at his tone of voice, Beckett said, "Come on; let's get ready for the beach."</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Kate, she's starting to run again," Castle said, nudging Beckett in the shoulder.</p>
      <p>"Crap, I told her…" Beckett said as she sat up. "Julia," she called to the little girl firmly. "Come here."</p>
      <p>"Mommy, I'm sorry, but the waves had shells, I wanted to get them before they took them back," Julia said, running up to where her mother and Castle were sitting on a blanket under an umbrella.</p>
      <p>"Why don't you wait until I go with you okay?" Beckett said, taking Julia onto her lap. "And I'll make them give them to you."</p>
      <p>"She'll do it too," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, yawning slightly.</p>
      <p>"Time for a nap?" Beckett asked. She wasn't surprised when Julia shook her head no, squirming in her lap, and she said, "Then why don't you go ahead and play in the sand a little more?"</p>
      <p>Watching the little girl with Beckett, Castle waited until she was far enough to be relatively out of earshot as he said, "<em>Dancing With the Stars</em>?"</p>
      <p>"Took you a while to mention it," Beckett said, leaning back on her hands. She sighed and said, "Never was much of a fan. Of course I never watched it until Julia. But her mother watched it with her and her psychiatrist told me to do things with Julia that she remembers so she doesn't get confused."</p>
      <p>"So in her mind, you watched it with her," Castle said. "That's why you said you forgot the dances."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I'm lucky she bought that, I don't know how I would have been able to explain it to her that I had never seen a dance from the show in my life before that day we watched all of them," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"And are you now a fan?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Sometimes," Beckett said, smiling slightly at him. "The good dancers I like; the ones that Julia likes the most really. Are you sure you're okay with watching it tonight. And next week too which I forgot to tell you she'd want to do. Sorry," she said in a rush at the end.</p>
      <p>"I told you I didn't mind," Castle said. "Actually I've watched sometimes with Alexis, you know she's a pretty big fan."</p>
      <p>Sitting up, Beckett watched as Julia started to build up a mound of sand over her feet before shaking them until the sand disappeared. "It was a lot of fun that day," she murmured eventually.</p>
      <p>"When you watched the show with Julia?" Castle asked, reaching over and brushing some sand that was on her right shoulder off her skin. When Beckett nodded he said, "I had a feeling you were thinking about watching <em>Temptation Lane</em> with your mom when you said that."</p>
      <p>"I was, it was pretty much like that, except Julia wasn't sick. Which I'm relieved about actually," Beckett said. "But I could almost see my mom and I, it was a little tough at first."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, it would be, but you still enjoyed it didn't you?" Castle asked, wrapping his arm around her waist.</p>
      <p>"Once I got over the emotional part of that, yes," Beckett said with a smile. "It was fun to watch her, and I was able to convince her I had forgotten a lot about the show, so I told her to remind me how it worked, what happened in it, the dances, all of that."</p>
      <p>"Has she ever said she wants to do that kind of dancing?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"All the time, but I'm not sure what she could do with that as a career," Beckett said. "And I know I'm thinking way too far ahead in the future," she said quickly as Castle opened his mouth to speak. "For all I know she could want to do something else when she gets older. But I get the feeling that she'll want to be a dancer in some capacity."</p>
      <p>"I'm sure there'll be a show for dancing," Castle said when she stopped talking. "Or she could even become a teacher."</p>
      <p>"That's true, and it'd be less likely she'd need to go to LA if she had her own studio," Beckett mused. She seemed to sense his gaze on her and she turned to Castle explaining, "I want to keep her close."</p>
      <p>"You're not alone," he said, smiling at that as they glanced at the little girl who was by then making designs in the sand with her hands. "I wanted Alexis to go to college in the city really badly."</p>
      <p>"I remember," Beckett said. "You didn't want her to go to Stanford early. But what if she decides she wants to go somewhere overseas for a semester?"</p>
      <p>"At this point I'm in denial and crossing my fingers she won't get the idea," Castle said, crossing his right index and middle fingers. "So please don't mention you going to Kiev again."</p>
      <p>"I won't, but really Castle, if she wants to go, let her go," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Do they have semesters in other colleges in the US? If she wanted to go somewhere here in the states that wouldn't be too bad. We could go visit her. I should look and see if they have a program that would let her attend a semester in Hawaii," Castle said. He looked at Beckett and saw she was shaking her head and he said defensively, "What?"</p>
      <p>"Maybe you should let her decide if she wants to do that," Beckett said simply. "And would you really need the excuse of her going to school in Hawaii to visit."</p>
      <p>"No, never stopped me from going there before," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Just promise me that if she decides to go to Oxford or anywhere else in the world, you won't try to stop her," Beckett said. "Subtly or outright."</p>
      <p>"I won't," Castle said. "Will you do the same with Julia?"</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said firmly. "Even though I'll miss her like crazy, I won't hold her back."</p>
      <p>"Makes you a good mom," Castle said as Julia ran up to them then.</p>
      <p>"Having fun sweetie?" Beckett asked as Julia wrapped her arms around her neck. She shared a kiss with her before her daughter nodded her head eagerly and then grabbed her hand, pulling on it until she got up. "I guess we're going swimming. Here, let me put on your vest."</p>
      <p>"No, I don't wanna swim, just go in Mommy," Julia said firmly. She giggled when Beckett followed her the rest of the way to the water and she ran in a little ahead of her, jumping over the waves that were coming in.</p>
      <p>Castle, staying on the blanket to give the two some time alone, smiled as Beckett swung Julia up into her arms and carried her further in the water before they ducked underneath. He remembered, an hour earlier, how Beckett had had to really calm Julia down when she had gone swimming out in the ocean for a little before reminding her she knew how to swim. He'd helped a little; sitting with Julia in the water as they'd watched her mother swimming and was able to convince her that going under the water was fun. He couldn't help feeling a little proud of that moment when Julia had begged him to take her in the water to join Beckett swimming and they had all three gone under the incoming waves to the little girl's delight.</p>
      <p>"I think," Beckett said as she and Julia walked up to the shore after swimming in the waves for a little. "You definitely need a nap."</p>
      <p>"I don't wanna Mommy," Julia said sleepily.</p>
      <p>"I know, but it's better if you do," Beckett said, sitting down on the blanket, her towel wrapped around her. She dried off Julia quickly and then let the little girl get on her lap, holding her against her as she cuddled close.</p>
      <p>"You don't want to go up to the house?" Castle asked her as Julia was soon asleep.</p>
      <p>"No, I thought she'd sleep faster here," Beckett commented, stroking Julia's damp hair. "I'm really glad you were able to convince her the water isn't something evil."</p>
      <p>"I got really lucky," Castle said. "I never had to do that with Alexis, so that was pure improv."</p>
      <p>"Speaking of which, how is she?" Beckett said, referring to the phone call he'd had with his daughter after they'd returned from lunch.</p>
      <p>"Pretty good, she was about to go out with some friends from Columbia," Castle said. "Lunch and shopping."</p>
      <p>"Sounds fun," Beckett said. "Last minute diversion before school starts. Speaking of lunch, what was with Chief Brady earlier when we were talking to him?"</p>
      <p>"It was Julia," Castle said, debating in his mind if he should tell her.</p>
      <p>"And?" Beckett asked, wondering what he wasn't telling her.</p>
      <p>"He thought she was ours," Castle said.</p>
      <p>Beckett, looking down at her daughter, looked up at him with wide eyes and said, "Oh… well, I guess that… he would think that. But you told him she wasn't right?"</p>
      <p>"No, he heard about Queens, so he realized who she was," Castle said, looking at her closely. He saw she was a little flustered, and he quickly dropped the subject, instead saying, "Is she ready for school?"</p>
      <p>"I think so," Beckett said, smiling down at Julia who shifted in her arms then. "I've explained to her it's going to be just like camp, but not with trips. She's nervous, and I really hope Celia ends up in her class, it'll be easier for them both."</p>
      <p>"Her friend's nervous too?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Very," Beckett said. "According to her mom, but I'm a lot more worried about my daughter."</p>
      <p>"Which makes sense," Castle said. "First time she'll be in any kind of school environment. But at least she had the camp."</p>
      <p>"That's why I signed her up for it, to see how she responded to being around other kids," Beckett said. "And she loved it, so I think she'll do well."</p>
      <p>"We'll have to see," Castle said, looking up at the sky. "Late for a nap," he told her, looking over to see Julia moving around slightly again.</p>
      <p>"That was my plan," Beckett said with a smile, kissing the top of Julia's hair. "I should have warned you before, but watching <em>Dancing With the Stars</em> she gets pretty excited and it's really hard to get her to bed after."</p>
      <p>"How do you get her to go to sleep?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Well, if the nap doesn't work, then I try anything I can to get her tired," Beckett said. "Which is really hard in an apartment."</p>
      <p>"But you've been able to," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Good thing too," Beckett said. "Handling a hyper child is tough work."</p>
      <p>"Watch out giving her too much sugar," Castle joked. He reached over then and placed his hand on hers which was on the blanket, and squeezed it gently. "I was thinking," he said. "About making dinner for us, but eating out here."</p>
      <p>"Sounds fun, but in the dark?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"We can make a bonfire," Castle said. "I have a permit for that. And I have some stuff to make s'mores; she's probably never had that before."</p>
      <p>"And you were just telling me something about not giving her sugar?" Beckett asked, giving him a look.</p>
      <p>"I did, but I'm sure you'll watch she doesn't eat too much," Castle said, raising her hand up to his lips.</p>
      <p>"I will, and it sounds like a good idea. You want me to help you with dinner though?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"I think I can handle it," Castle said. "Enjoy some time alone with Julia."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said before they grew quiet and watched the ocean in front of them as the sun started to sink lower in the west. She didn't speak again; and neither did Castle; until Julia started to move around with a sigh on her lap. "Hey, morning Julia," she said gently to the little girl as she opened her eyes.</p>
      <p>"Did I have a nap Mommy?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"You did, why, want another one?" Castle said. He laughed with Beckett when Julia shook her head no and said, "I better get inside and start cooking."</p>
      <p>"I want to give her a bath now," Beckett said, having Julia stand. "Because trying to get her to stay still for one later is not going to happen."</p>
      <p>After getting all of their things ready to take back inside, Castle followed Beckett and Julia back to the house where they split up after heading upstairs. When he finished with his shower, he went into the kitchen and began to prepare the meal for them. He was alone for a while until Julia ran inside. "Hey, did you have a nice bath?" he asked as she held onto the edge of the counter next to him standing on tip-toe, trying to look at what he was doing.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Mommy said to come here for you to watch me," Julia said, jumping up once.</p>
      <p>"Here," Castle said, picking her up so she could look.</p>
      <p>"What is it?" Julia said when he set her back down.</p>
      <p>"It's just some tuna melts," Castle said. "Have you ever had those?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, when Mommy and I went to the beach at home," Julia said. "Is that mine?"</p>
      <p>"Yes, do you like tomatoes?" Castle asked, showing her the slices he'd prepared. When she nodded he said, "Then I'll let you put them on your sandwich when it's ready okay?"</p>
      <p>Beckett came down into the kitchen a few minutes later to find Julia standing on a stool next to Castle, watching him press a sandwich into a pan he was using. "Looks good, did you help sweetie?" she asked her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, this one is Castle's, he said we need to wait for you for yours," Julia said in excitement.</p>
      <p>"Just to see what you want on yours," Castle told her.</p>
      <p>"The same as Julia, I'll take her and get everything ready outside," Beckett said. "Come on," she said to her daughter, holding her hand out to help her down from the stool.</p>
      <p>Watching the two leaving, Castle nearly burned his sandwich and hurried to get it off the pan before setting it aside. He quickly prepared Beckett's sandwich and was just finishing it when she came into the kitchen, Julia skipping in behind her. "The food's almost ready," he said.</p>
      <p>"Did you want me to get the fire started?" Beckett asked, leaning against the counter next to him, keeping an eye on Julia.</p>
      <p>"I can get it," Castle said. "And without burning off my eyebrows either," he directed to Julia, raising them up and down to make her laugh.</p>
      <p>"You've done that before?" Beckett asked with a smile.</p>
      <p>"No comment," Castle said as he waved his hand over the pan.</p>
      <p>"You're about to burn your hand, and I think my sandwich is done," Beckett said, taking it from him and getting the sandwich on a plate. She followed Julia; carrying a bottle of juice; outside and down to the grass where they sat on a blanket and watched Castle getting a bonfire set.</p>
      <p>As soon as the fire was crackling in the wood, the three sat down to eat, Julia leading the conversation by peppering Castle with questions about the fair. He and Beckett tried their best to get the little girl to eat, but she would only take a small bite before she started to bounce up and down on her knees in excitement.</p>
      <p>"You didn't mention she got like this before the show," Castle said, watching as Beckett had to literally force Julia to take a bite of some of the vegetables he'd made with the sandwiches.</p>
      <p>"It slipped my mind," Beckett said. "Sweetie, please," she said in slight frustration. "I don't want to have to put you to bed before eight."</p>
      <p>"Oh Mommy, no, please!" Julia said pleadingly.</p>
      <p>"Then will you stop and eat your dinner?" Beckett asked. When the little girl nodded slightly she said to Castle, "This is the only time I have trouble with her."</p>
      <p>"Could be worse," he replied. "And she does listen to you."</p>
      <p>"Because she's my mommy," Julia said then, pressing up close to Beckett's side.</p>
      <p>"That's true; would you have listened to Castle if he'd told you that?" Beckett asked her.</p>
      <p>"Did I have to?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Would you have to," Beckett corrected. "And yes, because you do need to eat."</p>
      <p>"I'm eating, see, my sammich is gone," Julia said, showing her mother her empty plate.</p>
      <p>"I'll grab dessert," Castle said, smiling as Beckett hugged her daughter tightly and kissed her on the cheek.</p>
      <p>"Mommy I'm excited," Julia said, jumping up and down on her knees.</p>
      <p>"Do you need to run?" Beckett asked. When Julia nodded she laughed and said, "Go ahead, but stay on the grass." She shook her head as the little girl jumped up and ran around in a large circle on the grass, crying out every so often.</p>
      <p>"Did she get into the s'mores while we weren't looking?" Castle asked as he walked outside and saw Julia.</p>
      <p>"No, she gets like this, every so often," Beckett said as Julia ran ahead of him and back to where she was sitting on the blanket. "Surprised you didn't she?"</p>
      <p>"Pretty much," Castle said with a smile. "Wasn't expecting that."</p>
      <p>"Neither was I, but it's exercise at least," Beckett said, helping him get the items for the dessert set. "Come on sweetie and sit."</p>
      <p>"What's that?" Julia asked, plopping down on the blanket and breathing hard.</p>
      <p>"You okay?" Beckett asked her in slight concern. When Julia nodded she said, "No more running okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay, but what is this Mommy?" Julia asked as Castle set a marshmallow on the end of a kabob skewer. Her mouth dropped open when he put it in the fire and said, "You're burning it!"</p>
      <p>"You're supposed to," Castle said. "They didn't do this at your camp?"</p>
      <p>"It was a day camp," Beckett said. "I'm going to wait and see when she's older if she wants to go to actual camps. Julia, watch okay, he didn't burn it, just made it hot and we'll put it in between these crackers, and it'll melt the chocolate," she explained as she helped him with the s'more and then gave it to Julia. "Be careful, it's still hot."</p>
      <p>Julia blew on the dessert for a little before she took a tentative bite. She seemed to make up her mind after eating that bite, and took a larger one, getting melted chocolate down her chin.</p>
      <p>"Whoa, I think that means she likes it," Castle said as he handed Beckett a napkin. "Should I make her another one when she's done?"</p>
      <p>"I think one is enough, for me too," Beckett said, eating her s'more carefully as she kept an eye on her daughter.</p>
      <p>"So how did you like today?" Castle asked Julia and Beckett.</p>
      <p>"It was nice," Beckett answered since the little girl was busy with her dessert still. "Was a nice lunch and I had fun swimming."</p>
      <p>"Me too!" Julia cried out. "But the sand got on my feet all over when I got out."</p>
      <p>"I know, mine too," Castle said, making a face as Julia giggled heavily at that. "But it was a great day."</p>
      <p>"Oh, we better get going," Beckett said, looking at her father's watch. "Almost ten to eight."</p>
      <p>"Right, Julia, help me out with the fire," Castle said. When the little girl looked at him with wide eyes he smiled and said, "Just throw the sand on it from here okay?" directing her to the edge of the blanket. Together they put the fire out and he helped Beckett gather their things before they headed back inside. "Do I have time to make some coffee?" he asked her as he put away everything in the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"You do, you don't have to watch the beginning with us," Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"No, but I'd like to," Castle said. "I'll get Julia some milk."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said, taking Julia's hand and leading her into the family room. She down on the couch and turned on the TV as she kept an eye out for Julia who was spinning a little in front of her.</p>
      <p>"Just made it," Castle said, seeing that the show started just as he entered the room. He handed Beckett her coffee and set Julia's milk on the coffee table before the little girl went over to the couch.</p>
      <p>Julia didn't really notice that she had a drink; her entire focus seemed to be on the TV and the show which soon started with another star and professional dancer performing a Paso Doble. She made a little noise of excitement as the music began, and she held her Stitch doll to her tightly against her chest as she watched the dancing.</p>
      <p>"So it's only before and after the show she's hyper?" Castle asked Beckett as Julia relaxed when the dance was over.</p>
      <p>"Pretty much, I'm guessing it means she'll be a very focused dancer," Beckett replied, stroking Julia's hair as she gave her her glass of milk. "You're not thirsty?" she asked her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Wait," Julia said as the couple got their scores on the screen and she was hugging her doll to her again. "Oooh, Mommy did you see, they got the high numbers," she said to Beckett eagerly.</p>
      <p>"I did," Beckett said before the next couple was announced before the commercial break. She wasn't too surprised when her daughter gave a short scream as Derek Hough appeared and she laughed as Castle jumped and pretended to clear his ear. "Should have warned you about that too."</p>
      <p>"Nothing I haven't heard before," Castle replied. He smiled as Julia whispered a sorry and said, "That's okay, Alexis probably is doing the same thing right now, just in her mind."</p>
      <p>"She watches the dancing?" Julia asked in amazement.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, you know who her favorite is?" Castle said. He shared a smile with Beckett when Julia whispered who before he said, "Derek."</p>
      <p>"She likes Derek too?" Julia said excitedly. When Castle nodded she said, "Does she vote for him?"</p>
      <p>"She does, but she likes Karina and Kym too… if I'm remembering correctly," Castle said. "Karina's got dark hair right?"</p>
      <p>"She does, and that's Julia's second favorite on the show, Kym after her," Beckett said as the show came back from commercial. She watched as Julia turned to the TV, watching it intently and holding her Stitch doll up to her mouth.</p>
      <p>Castle was watching Julia as well, smiling as the little girl gave a little jump as the song started and the dance began. He was surprised when Beckett and Julia both made a noise in surprise and he looked at them.</p>
      <p>"I'll tell you after," Beckett explained quickly. She settled back to watch the dance, a Foxtrot, glancing at Julia whose eyes were wide, her body tense. She was relieved when the dance soon finished, and her daughter relaxed. She reached over to the coffee table, and picked up her phone.</p>
      <p>"Mommy are you gonna vote for me?" Julia asked eagerly, looking at her mother.</p>
      <p>"Right now, but watch, they're going to get their scores," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>Julia whirled back to the TV, and waited impatiently until the three judges revealed their scores. She shrieked in joy shortly as the couple got a perfect score, and she jumped up and down on the couch on her knees. "Mommy, Mommy did you hear?" she said excitedly.</p>
      <p>"I know, I'm glad, they did a great job with that dance," Beckett said, stopping Julia. "What did you think?" she directed to Castle, wanting to involve him as well.</p>
      <p>"Was a great Foxtrot, and what was with the song?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"It's a song George Harrison covered, <em>Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea</em>," Beckett explained. "A favorite of Julia's."</p>
      <p>"Well they definitely deserved that 30 then," Castle said. "Kate," he said after he watched her texting something on her phone. When she replied with a questioning, "Hmm?" he asked, "What's the number to vote for Veronica and Derek?"</p>
      <p>"You want to vote too?" Julia asked in complete astonishment.</p>
      <p>"Sure, they're both really good," Castle said. "And I want to help them win because you want them to win right?"</p>
      <p>Julia nodded slowly, watching with wide eyes as Castle quickly texted the number that Beckett told him. "Thank you," she said shyly as he put away his phone.</p>
      <p>"You're very welcome, I hope they make it to next week and win," Castle said as Beckett had her drink the rest of her milk. "Wait, why are they having the season now? I always remember Alexis is just starting the school year when there's a new season of <em>Dancing With the Stars</em>."</p>
      <p>"Good question, they did a special summer season, didn't really explain why," Beckett said, finishing up her coffee. The show came back on then, and she fell quiet as they watched the next couple dance a Waltz together. "Not that good?" she asked Julia.</p>
      <p>"No, she didn't keep her arms up," Julia said, raising her arms slightly. "And she slipped too."</p>
      <p>"She's really observant," Castle said before they heard the scores.</p>
      <p>After the last couple went, and the first couple performed their second dance of the night, Beckett stood up and asked Castle, "Do you want more coffee?"</p>
      <p>"Sure, but I can go get it," he said as she picked up his mug.</p>
      <p>"That's fine, just keep an eye on her for me," Beckett said as she left with Julia's glass as well.</p>
      <p>"With Derek on next I really doubt I'll need to do much," Castle said with a smile. The show came on then and he watched as there a short biography about the star, Veronica Winters. He kept an eye on Julia, seeing that she was still watching the show closely, and he said, "You really like this show a lot don't you?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, shh, they're gonna dance now," Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"What's the dance?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Rumba," Julia said in a whisper as the music started on the screen.</p>
      <p>Looking at the screen, Castle suddenly remembered what kind of dance the Rumba was, and he hurriedly covered Julia's eyes as the couple began to move to the music.</p>
      <p>"I can't see the dance!" Julia complained, trying to take his hand off her face.</p>
      <p>"Castle, what are you doing to my daughter?" Beckett said as she walked back in and saw what he was doing.</p>
      <p>"Have you seen the Rumbas on this show?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Let her watch," Beckett said. When he'd let go of Julia, she gave him his mug of coffee and said, "She's seen every Rumba, and it's not a problem for her, it's just a dance."</p>
      <p>"Oh… sorry Julia," Castle said, touching the little girl's shoulder.</p>
      <p>Julia didn't respond, until the song was finished and said, "Did they do good?"</p>
      <p>"I think so," Beckett said. "You're not mad at him are you?" she asked, pointing to Castle.</p>
      <p>"No, but I wanted to see the dance," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"We'll try and remember to watch it online tomorrow okay?" Beckett asked. When Julia nodded she pulled her into her arms and kissed her temple as they waited to hear the score. She wasn't too surprised when her daughter gave a little chirp of joy at the second perfect score, and she smiled saying, "I think they're going to make it into the finals."</p>
      <p>"Think so?" Julia asked her mother worriedly.</p>
      <p>"She's right, they're really good dancers," Castle said, not sure still if she was mad at him.</p>
      <p>"You think so?" Julia said again, looking at him. When he nodded she sighed and yawned a little, making her mother hold her closer to her. "I'm not tired Mommy," she said quickly.</p>
      <p>"I know, but if you fall asleep that's okay," Beckett said, stroking her hair. The next couple started to dance then, and she wasn't too surprised when Julia slid to the end of the couch, watching intently again. She sat back and watched both her daughter and the dances as she finished her coffee, not surprised when Castle placed his arm around her shoulder at one point. She leaned against him slightly until the show finished, and Julia hopped off the couch, jumping and spinning in front of them, squealing happily.</p>
      <p>"You weren't kidding about her being hyper," Castle said as Beckett sat up. "So what're you going to do to get her calmed down?"</p>
      <p>"Sweetie? Come here okay," Beckett said as Julia passed by her and she was able to grab her. "Want to watch Jennifer and Derek's dances?"</p>
      <p>"Can I?" Julia said happily.</p>
      <p>"What do you need me to do?" Castle said immediately when Beckett turned to him.</p>
      <p>"Go onto YouTube and search Jennifer and Derek… what order do you want to go?" Beckett said, looking at her daughter.</p>
      <p>"In order," Julia said, squirming in joy.</p>
      <p>"Okay, then search their names and Viennese Waltz," Beckett told him.</p>
      <p>"Jennifer Grey? I remember Alexis stressing at the end of that season, she wanted her to win," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"She's Julia's favorite star and they're her favorite couple so far in the show," Beckett replied as he started the dance and she picked up Julia, putting her on her lap.</p>
      <p>After watching the Jive after the first dance, Castle said, "I can see why you and Alexis like her, she's great." He started searching for the next dance, the Samba, and he said, "Wasn't she in <em>Dirty Dancing</em>?"</p>
      <p>"She was, but she didn't do perfectly with every dance," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, she does mess ups too," Julia said. "Shh, this is my fav'rite," she said eagerly. She bounced a little in time to the song, and when it was finished she said, "Mommy, can I dance like that?"</p>
      <p>"You mean these kinds of dances?" Beckett asked. When Julia nodded eagerly she smiled and said, "I think so, but why don't we wait until you're a little older to find ballroom dance lessons for you okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay, but I can learn right?" Julia asked. When her mother nodded she squealed and hugged her tightly, "I wanna dance Sambas and Pasos, all of them."</p>
      <p>"Sure, but you still have ballet for now okay?" Beckett said, slight laughter in her voice.</p>
      <p>Julia nodded before she watched the screen as Jennifer and Derek danced the Argentine Tango and after they watched the Foxtrot. She glanced at Castle while he was searching for the Paso Doble and said, "Do you like these dances?"</p>
      <p>"I do," Castle said, squeezing her shoulder gently as her voice was incredibly timid. "It's pretty interesting to see that people can learn to dance that well."</p>
      <p>"Do you want to watch them all?" Julia asked. He nodded and she said, "They have really good dances, huh Mommy?"</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled and nodded in affirmation before she kissed Julia's temple and they turned their attention to the Paso Doble, a team Cha-Cha-Cha and the Tango before they watched the next dance. "She got hurt around this time," she said when they finished watching the Quickstep. "Her knee."</p>
      <p>"Impressive, she deserved to win then," Castle said firmly. By then he had his arm around Beckett's shoulders and he glanced down at Julia, seeing she was looking up at him. "Please tell me she wins," he said, pretending to be anxious. He smiled when the little girl giggled and then nodded slightly. "Ah, a Rumba, I promise not to cover your eyes," he said, seeing the dance and talking to Julia.</p>
      <p>Smiling as her daughter laughed, Beckett said, "It's alright, this one isn't too bad," before they watched. She smiled when a surprised expression appeared on Castle's face at the extension Jennifer and Derek did towards the end of the dance and said; once it had finished, "I had the same look on my face seeing that dance for the first time."</p>
      <p>"That's pretty cool," Castle said, looking at Julia who was smiling at him.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, they got perfect for it," Julia said, not as eagerly as she would have said before, looking tired.</p>
      <p>"You need to get to bed soon sweetie," Beckett said, kissing the top of her head.</p>
      <p>"Only little more Mommy," Julia sighed. She wrapped her arms around her firmly as they watched the last six dances, but during the last one, which was very short, she closed her eyes and was soon asleep.</p>
      <p>"Now-" Castle started to say, ready to search for the next dance when Beckett quickly quieted him. "She's asleep?" he whispered.</p>
      <p>Nodding, Beckett started to get up when he stopped her. She watched him in surprise as he picked her up, and looked on as Julia woke up slightly as she was lifted up.</p>
      <p>"Do I have to go to sleep?" the little girl asked groggily.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, your mom said it's time," Castle said, waiting to see if she would demand to be put down. Julia's response was to simply turn her head and wrap her arms around his neck, falling back asleep. He breathed out carefully in relief, and carried her to the stairs with Beckett following him. He handed her to her mother in the doorway of her room, and stepped out to let Beckett change her daughter before he went back to the doorway, watching as she tucked her in.</p>
      <p>"I love you Julia," Beckett whispered lovingly as she smoothed down Julia's hair. She was surprised when she heard Castle walk up behind her and hand her the little girl's Stitch doll. "Thanks," she whispered. She tucked it into Julia's arms, smiling as they closed around it tightly and she sighed. She leaned over and kissed Julia's cheeks before getting up and letting him take her hand. When they were going down the stairs she said, "I think she accepts you now."</p>
      <p>"I thought she was going to ask why I was holding her," Castle said. "But you're right."</p>
      <p>"I'm really glad, I wasn't sure she really was ever going to at least not as much as she has today," Beckett said as they sat down in the family room to finish their coffee. She smiled when he wrapped his arm around her waist and said, "What would you have done if she never did?"</p>
      <p>"Never occurred to me she wouldn't," Castle said. "I thought at some point in the next two weeks she would have at least recognized the fact that I was part of your life, if not accept me. But you wanted her to be okay with me didn't you?"</p>
      <p>"It would have been really difficult if she had a problem with you," Beckett said. "You're both a part of my life, a pretty big part of my life, so I was hoping."</p>
      <p>"Me too, I didn't want that to be a problem for you," Castle said. He looked at the TV, seeing it was on the last dance still, and he said, "You think me watching that with her helped?"</p>
      <p>"Most likely," Beckett said. "But I also told her how much I trust you, and that I do like you, a lot, when she asked me. It's nice to know you feel the same about me too. And that we're both important to you," she said, looking at him.</p>
      <p>"You heard us?" Castle said, remembering talking to her daughter the day before when he'd thought she was asleep.</p>
      <p>"I did, and I'm surprised you didn't try to oversell how many times you've saved my life," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"I'm surprised you didn't try to downplay it when you told her that," Castle said defensively before she rolled her eyes. "Well, I wasn't about to tell her how dangerous her mother's job is. I just hope she knows I look out for you when we're in those situations."</p>
      <p>"I think she does," Beckett said with a slight smile as she put down her empty mug and wrapped her arms around him. "You know we can relax about that for the rest of our vacation now," she said, looking up at him and tilting his head down to hers slightly.</p>
      <p>"You have a point," Castle said, closing the gap between them, their lips brushing together. He paused then before he could kiss her and looked at her before they both said at the same time, "Bedroom." He stood up and took her hand before leading her up the stairs, stopping with her to make a quick check on Julia before they hurried down the other end of the hall. As soon as the door was shut and locked, he kissed her hard, pushing her back against it as she was quick to respond to him and they held onto each other tightly. When they needed to breathe he forced himself to step back and lead her to the bed, pulling her against him before he kissed her neck, pushing her hair out of the way.</p>
      <p>Beckett could feel Castle's hands pulling down the straps of her dress before she pulled back and started to unbutton his shirt as they kissed again. She let him pull down the front of her sundress before she had his shirt open and she leaned against him, as they both worked to get it off of him while their lips met. When they finally parted; long after the shirt was discarded; she let him lay her back on the bed before he pulled off her dress, brushing a kiss on the scar between her breasts. She sucked in a breath of air as he trailed down her body, and she was vaguely aware that at some point he'd taken off the rest of her clothes, and she was naked. She didn't try to think out how exactly he'd done that, instead sliding her fingers through his hair as he kissed his way down the insides of her thighs before she forced herself to sit up.</p>
      <p>Feeling Beckett's hands in between them, Castle pulled away from her legs and went up to her shoulders, kissing them lightly as she opened his fly hurriedly. He sensed then what she wanted from him, and he hurried to finish undressing on his own before he got up on the bed fully as she slid back from him. He slid his hand under her neck, and as he kissed her, started to run his other hand down her body, starting at her shoulder, stroking the skin.</p>
      <p>Sliding her fingers across his back, Beckett watched as he caressed her skin, his lips brushing across her collarbone before he moved up to her neck. She was breathing roughly as his touch sent a thrill through her body that seemed to build up as his hand moved down from her stomach to her legs. She quickly pulled him up to her lips as she spread her legs at his touch, and was relieved when he carefully moved to enter her, distracted from that as he was curling his tongue around hers at the same time. As he started to move against her, she was holding onto him tightly, her arms wrapped around his shoulders. She eventually started to move in time with him, wrapping both her legs around him securely, pulling him even more against her body.</p>
      <p>Breaking away from Beckett's lips, panting hard, Castle stared into her eyes before he lightly brushed his lips to hers, in great contrast to their bodies undulating together. He slid his mouth down to her neck, kissing at it before he started to suck on her skin, feeling her fingers digging into his shoulders before he suddenly stopped moving. He held her hip with one hand, keeping her from moving as she tried to do.</p>
      <p>"Castle…" Beckett whispered before he silenced her by kissing her. She was relieved when he started to thrust against her again, and at the same time turned them around so she was on top of him. Breathing hard as they had to part to move, she wrapped her arms around him, pressing her forehead against his, going back to the same harder pace he'd been moving at on top of her. She could feel his hands all over her back, shaking as each touch was an explosion, the difference in the texture of their skin almost tripled she was so sensitive. She wasn't too shocked when a few minutes later he turned them back around, laying her in the middle of the bed. She tried to keep him from stopping, but he wouldn't be persuaded by her whispered pleading and he stopped completely, kissing her a little crazily when he did. She wanted to try and somehow get him moving again, but he stayed still until finally he pulled away from her lips and thrust against her a little harder than before. She was ready, and she wrapped her legs tighter around him, one around his own legs, the other hooked around his waist, trying desperately to draw him further in her, getting a little desperate with the way he was stopping and starting which was interrupting her satisfaction.</p>
      <p>Unable to stop again, Castle kissed his way down Beckett's neck until he reached the hollow of her throat, nibbling along the edge before he moved to her shoulder, kissing the junction between it and her neck. Her nails were dragging along his back and it spurred him to move faster, groaning against her skin at the feel of her, hearing her crying out in response below him. He lifted his head, and kissed her hard, crushing her lips as they started become a little frantic at the same time, grabbing each other tightly, nails digging into each other's skin before he felt her tensing up under him, frozen for a moment before he lost control only moments after her.</p>
      <p>Breathing hard as she held Castle against her tightly, Beckett stroked his hair as they came down from their climax, feeling him shuddering in response. "You've never done that before," she said when she felt she could speak again, her body throbbing pleasantly.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, improvised again," Castle said, turning his head and pressing his forehead against hers. "Would you like me to do that again?"</p>
      <p>"I'm not sure," Beckett said truthfully. "It's frustrating and pretty nice at the same time. Why don't you surprise me with it every once in a while so I can't stop you."</p>
      <p>"Definitely will," Castle said before he pulled away from her and lay behind her as she turned onto her side. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, pulling her back against him, their fingers entwined together. "You're enjoying this vacation right?"</p>
      <p>"We've only been here two full days," Beckett said, turning her head back to look at him. "But we're doing a lot more than we did the first time we came here together. So yes, I am." She smiled when he mumbled, "Me too," and she could feel him kissing the back of her right shoulder. She reached back with her hand and cupped the side of his head before he moved up to her lips, just barely pressing against them. "I think," she said as he started to kiss her. "We're not done with today."</p>
      <p>"I'm definitely not," Castle said, reaching down to her legs and carefully pulling one before she draped it back over his. He kissed her deeply as he entered her again, taking her moan of pleasure as he kissed her, before he placed his hand on her stomach with his other, holding her as they began to move together at almost the same time.</p>
      <p>Beckett was holding Castle's hand tightly on her stomach as she felt his other hand start to roam around her skin. She closed her eyes tightly as he pulled away from her lips and went back to her shoulder, kissing it firmly. The press of his lips sent a thrill shooting through her spine that seemed to explode where he was buried inside her and she grasped the back of his neck tightly before he pressed his cheek against hers. She could feel his breath against her neck, and his other hand was running down her abdomen, avoiding their clasped hands before sliding over her leg that was draped back over his.</p>
      <p>Nuzzling her cheek with his own, Castle ran his fingers over her thigh, repeatedly, hearing her lightly gasping in response in front of him. He reached up after he had been doing that for a while, and made her turn her head back to him, kissing her as soon as her lips were close enough. He lowered his hand again, but that time reached in between her legs, touching her carefully at first when she suddenly tensed up and threw her head back against his shoulder, crying out what he thought might have been his name though he wasn't sure. He didn't care, squeezing her hand tightly in his as she turned her head and kissed at his jaw and cheek frantically.</p>
      <p>Tightening her grip on the back of his neck, Beckett felt herself losing control of her body, moving on pure instinct. She tried to fight it at first, but in the end gave up, the haphazard smack of their hips meeting reaching her ears. She felt his mouth at her ear and heard him whisper her name in a kind of strangled groan. She turned her head again, so they could kiss, and she parted her lips to his tongue. She couldn't keep that up for very long, soon needing to breathe, panting heavily as they let go of each other's hands before he reached up to her breasts and started to stroke them. She was clutching at the bed with her free hand as she tried to process everything he was doing to her, making her feel, but it was getting to be too much. She finally stopped struggling, and let everything take her over without thinking about how he was making her entire body literally shake in pleasure.</p>
      <p>Kissing hard at Beckett's neck and shoulders again, Castle slid his hand down from her chest to her abdomen, pressing on it slightly to bring her closer to him. He watched her in front of him, taking care to keep an eye the way her body was moving in time with his thrusts. He kissed her again, reaching up to turn her head towards his, and used his free hand to touch her, wherever he possibly could reach. He soon felt her slowing down slightly, her breathing rough and echoing in the room, and he hurriedly reached up to her breasts once more.</p>
      <p>Arching her back slightly, Beckett stopped trying to even match Castle's pace, instead moving at her own as she broke, crying out harshly. She soon could feel him groaning against her hair, holding onto her as tightly as he could. She still had her hand on the back of his neck, and she rubbed it gently until they slowed their frantic thrusts and eventually stopped. She had to let him go when he moved from behind her, but she didn't mind, turning to face him as he lay back. "I think we're getting back to how we were before," she told him, resting her chin on his shoulder.</p>
      <p>"You're not seeing… that guy, I don't want to say his name and ruin it," Castle said.</p>
      <p>Smiling, Beckett shook her head and said, "No, I didn't at all, and not even while you were behind me. But I don't feel my memories of the house in Queens trying to drag me down when we're together. Not like I did a month or so before."</p>
      <p>"Nightmares?" Castle asked, running his fingers through her hair carefully.</p>
      <p>"Sometimes, but they're getting fewer and far between," Beckett sighed. "So I think I'm almost over what happened but I don't think I'll be ready yet to go back to bringing in handcuffs like we used to do before that."</p>
      <p>"That's fine, there are a lot of other things we can have fun with that don't include light bondage," Castle said quickly. He knew she would have flashbacks of Queens if they played around with that, so he never suggested it. "But you're feeling better right?" he suddenly asked.</p>
      <p>"I am," Beckett reassured him. "And I'm guessing you're referencing my exhaustion?" When he nodded she kissed him gently before saying, "I'm fine, I've gotten a lot more rest in the past two days than in three months." She smiled when he suddenly made her lay down, and she reached up to him, cupping his face in her hands before they exchanged a brief kiss. "I'm not really that tired now," she said as he drifted over her cheek and to her ear. She felt his hand brushing her hair aside from her neck, and she reached in between them, brushing carefully against him.</p>
      <p>"I can tell," Castle said, pulling away to look at her. "So, if we were to stay up later than normal you'd be okay with that?"</p>
      <p>"You already know the answer Castle," Beckett said, rolling her eyes in mock annoyance before she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him hard enough to bring him down onto her.</p>
      <p>Groaning as their bodies joined together easily, Castle crushed her lips with his own, turning them around so she was above him. He sat up with her quickly, not wanting to break their kiss as she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him tight against her as they moved at the same time.</p>
      <p>Beckett's head was spinning slightly as they made love for a third time, going a little slower than the previous two times. She didn't mind it, as it allowed them to take their time to kiss and touch each other. As he kissed her neck, breasts and always went back to her lips, she gave him everything willingly, not thinking about anything except him. Thoughts of the past were gone, and she found herself eager and determined to make sure that she was giving Castle as much as he gave back to her. She finally had to admit, once they had reached their end together; almost simultaneously; that she was exhausted, and they lay together, her cheek resting against his chest before she was the first to speak. "I love you," she said, her voice low, but sounding as if she was screaming in the quiet room.</p>
      <p>"I love you Kate," Castle said, pressing his cheek to the top of her head. "We'll get us back to normal, we're pretty close."</p>
      <p>"I know," Beckett said, glad that he knew what she couldn't say. "Thank you," she said suddenly, raising her head to be able to look at him.</p>
      <p>"You're welcome… what for?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"For not giving up on me with this. For staying with me with a lot of my life changing," Beckett said. "And definitely for staying with me even though I have a child now."</p>
      <p>"And you realize I stay with you gladly," Castle said simply. "Whatever happens to you, to us."</p>
      <p>"I know," Beckett said before she hugged him tightly. She kissed him then, reaching up and brushing the tips of her fingers against his jaw before they parted, pressing their foreheads together. She soon closed her eyes, his hand holding hers tightly as she slipped into sleep faster than she had expected, unaware until that point that their time together that night had drained her more than she realized. She didn't mind, the satisfaction Castle had given her; they'd given one another; was more than enough to make up for it.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. In The Sky</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter is a lyric from the song Beautiful Night by Paul McCartney from his album Flaming Pie.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>"Is that where we're going Mommy?" Julia asked, holding onto Beckett's hand tightly.</p>
      <p>"It is," she replied as she swung Julia's hand in between them. Beckett smiled as her daughter giggled happily and she looked behind them to see that Castle was coming out of the diner where they'd eaten lunch. "Wait, he's coming right now," she said quickly when she turned back and saw that Julia was sliding her foot over the curb.</p>
      <p>"She's ready to go?" Castle asked, seeing the little girl fidgeting.</p>
      <p>"Can we?" Julia asked him eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Yes, let's go," Castle said. He was going to step down onto the street when Julia grabbed his hand.</p>
      <p>"Mommy says you have to hold hands when you cross the street. And look both ways," the little girl explained.</p>
      <p>"She's right," Castle said. "I don't know what I was thinking, sorry about that," he said before they stepped down into the street and then crossed into the park where there were a number of stalls and rides on the other side. "So I'm following you two here," he said, a little surprised when Julia didn't let go of his hand after they'd crossed.</p>
      <p>"I think we'll just look around," Beckett replied as they started to walk down the first aisle in front of them. She watched Julia; still holding Castle's hand; and smiled at him when he gave her a questioning look. She was distracted from trying to explain to him when Julia let go of them and hurried up to a stall that was selling wreaths made of ribbons and fake flowers. "She's looking at you to protect her; she gets nervous around crowds of people," she quickly explained in a whisper to him before they followed the little girl.</p>
      <p>"Great, I was afraid after Tuesday she'd stop liking me," Castle said. "Since <em>Dancing With the Stars</em> was finished for the week."</p>
      <p>"No, I think as long as you don't do something stupid to her she'll keep accepting you," Beckett said. "If you can keep from doing that," she then added wryly.</p>
      <p>"So far so good," Castle said, knowing she was joking. "And it's been four days since then, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed."</p>
      <p>"So am I," Beckett replied before she turned her attention to her daughter, buying a light blue wreath for her. She helped her put it on her hair and said, "You look beautiful sweetie, just like a fairy."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia said shyly as she looked at herself in a mirror on a table with the other wreaths for sale.</p>
      <p>"She's right, it's perfect," Castle said as Julia turned her head back and forth to see the ribbons trailing back through her hair.</p>
      <p>"Let's keep going okay?" Beckett said before they started walking again. The aisle mainly had stalls of different artistic items that she glanced at before continuing on before she came to one that had different statues.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, can I get this for my room?" Julia asked, pointing to a large statue of the Buddha meditating.</p>
      <p>"How about this size?" Beckett said, directing her to smaller versions of the same statue. When her daughter nodded she bought it and was about to put the bag on her arm to hold Julia's hand with her other, when Castle took it for her. "I can carry it pretty well," she told him.</p>
      <p>"I don't have a problem with taking it," Castle said with a shrug as they walked past some more stalls. "Interesting stuff," he said, nodding to the merchandise on sale.</p>
      <p>"Yes," Beckett said, shaking her head slightly at his tactic to try and change the subject. "Not much for sale though," she said as they came to the end of the aisle and were at different rides with some midway games.</p>
      <p>"Well, it's not that big of a town, and by now the population's gone down a lot," Castle said. "There's a bigger fair, they hold it at the high school, at the start of summer."</p>
      <p>"Mommy, can I see the aminals?" Julia begged then. When Beckett looked at her she pointed to the small petting zoo that was set up, and jumped up and down when her mother agreed to take her.</p>
      <p>"You don't want to come in with us?" Beckett asked as she bought tickets for her and Julia.</p>
      <p>"I'll sit this one out," Castle said. "You have your camera?" he then said. After she had handed it to him he asked, "Should I just take pictures of her or both of you?"</p>
      <p>"Whatever you want to take a picture of," Beckett replied. "But try and take more of her."</p>
      <p>"I know, I was like this with Alexis, still am actually," Castle said. "Which she thinks is weird, but all parents go through that."</p>
      <p>"Can we go Mommy?" Julia asked, watching them a little impatiently.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said. She took Julia's hand and led her inside the paddock where there were different animals; sheep, goats and even a llama; walking around the people who were petting them. She let Julia walk around; the little girl sticking close to her; leading the way, until she tentatively touched a sheep that still had its wool.</p>
      <p>"It's soft Mommy," Julia said in amazement. She tried to step forward when she felt something holding her and looked down to see a baby goat nibbling on the edge of the blue skirt that she was wearing. "He's eating my clothes!" she cried out before she let go of her mother's hand and started to pet it.</p>
      <p>"You want to try and feed them sweetie?" Beckett asked. When Julia nodded, she went over to a dispenser and got some food, saying to Castle who was on the other side of the fence it was up against, "I was wondering how she'd react."</p>
      <p>"She can surprise you sometimes," Castle said. "I'm still trying to figure out how she got to love swimming so much when she was terrified in the first place."</p>
      <p>"And I'm trying to figure out why she trusts you more than me to catch her when she jumps into the pool," Beckett said. She smiled when Castle shrugged and said, "I don't mind she's doing that though."</p>
      <p>"Neither do I, but I think your daughter's getting a little edgy waiting for you to get back to her," Castle said, nodding behind her.</p>
      <p>Turning, Beckett saw that Julia was letting the baby goat nibble at her skirt, and she hurried over to her. "Here Julia," she told the little girl, shooing the goat so it would stop chewing at the fabric. "Just hold your hand out like this," she told her as she poured a little of the dried corn into her small palm.</p>
      <p>"Tickles," Julia giggled heavily as the baby goat ate quickly. "More? Please?" she said quickly, looking up at Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Let's give some to another animal okay?" Beckett said. She smiled when Julia nodded, and then took her hand, leading her to a sheep when Julia suddenly detoured off to the side.</p>
      <p>"A pony!" Julia cried softly as she reached over a fence and pet a Shetland pony.</p>
      <p>"How cute, want to try and feed it?" Beckett asked. She wasn't surprised when her daughter stuck her hand out and she poured some of the food into it before she said, "Hold your hand as flat as you can sweetie, it's easier for the horse to eat that way."</p>
      <p>After she had fed the tiny horse, Julia gently pet its mane, and giggled when it kept trying to eat from her hand, going up her arm. "Can I ride the pony Mommy?" she asked Beckett.</p>
      <p>"I don't think so Julia, why don't we go feed another animal?" she asked. She wasn't too surprised when her daughter shook her head, so Beckett handed her the rest of the food which she in turn gave to the horse. "Okay, let's keep going, maybe you can go on a ride," she said as she picked Julia up. She was relieved when Julia didn't protest their leaving, and she met Castle outside the paddock.</p>
      <p>"Was that fun?" he asked as he handed Beckett her camera.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I fed a baby goat and a pony," Julia said as her mother cleaned her hand with some sanitizer before she took his hand. "Did you see the pony?"</p>
      <p>"I did, it was pretty small, so I couldn't ride it, but I bet if you got a little saddle you could," Castle said as Beckett took Julia's other hand and they walked down the path they'd been on before. "How'd you like to go on a ride now?" he asked the little girl as they reached a small group of rides for younger kids.</p>
      <p>Julia looked at the ride they were in front of, of small airplanes going around in a circle, and she shook her head. "Mommy, look, ponies!" she gasped, looking to her left.</p>
      <p>"Come on," Beckett said with a smile before she picked her up. She paid for the admission ticket and went into the corral, putting Julia on a pony that was white with a grey marking on its forehead. "Hold on to the pommel sweetie, and try not to kick the horse," she told her.</p>
      <p>"Do you stay Mommy?" Julia asked worriedly.</p>
      <p>"No, but I'll be right there next to Castle, watching you okay?" Beckett said. When Julia slowly nodded she left and leaned against the fence next to him. She immediately started to take pictures of her daughter as she went around in a circle on her pony, waving as the little girl waved at them eagerly, but tried to do so carefully.</p>
      <p>"She loves horses," Castle commented as Julia passed them and they waved.</p>
      <p>"What little girl doesn't?" Beckett asked with a smile as she took another picture and then went to the gate to get her daughter as the ponies stopped going around. "How was that sweetie?" she asked the little girl after taking her down from the horse.</p>
      <p>"Was lots fun Mommy," Julia said happily, wrapping her arms around her tightly. "Can I go again?"</p>
      <p>"Why don't we let other people get a chance to ride the ponies," Beckett suggested gently. "And we can take a look at what else there is to do okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said eagerly. "It was fun Mommy."</p>
      <p>"I bet it was," Beckett said, smiling at how enthusiastic Julia was being. She kissed her forehead before setting her down on the ground once she had reached Castle and said, "But there are other things to do."</p>
      <p>"I see you liked your first time on a horse," Castle said as Julia started to skip as they continued walking.</p>
      <p>"Yes, it was cute too, my pony," Julia said eagerly. "Can't I go again Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"How about you get your face painted sweetie?" Beckett said quickly when she saw the stall ahead of them. When Julia nodded she breathed a mental sigh of relief and led her daughter to the stall where she helped her pick out a blue butterfly to paint on her right cheek.</p>
      <p>"I bet you anything this Christmas she'll be asking you for a pony," Castle said as they watched Julia while the butterfly was painted.</p>
      <p>"I was thinking that myself," Beckett said. "About two months ago when we were in Central Park and she saw some people riding horses and asked me that. I had to remind her our home was nowhere near big enough for a horse, let alone a pony."</p>
      <p>"She could take lessons, they have stables for that," Castle said. "Around the park."</p>
      <p>"When she's older I'll see, right now it's enough with ballet," Beckett said as Julia got down from her chair and ran up to them.</p>
      <p>"See? See my butterfly Mommy?" Julia said, turning her right cheek towards her mother. "It's blue!"</p>
      <p>"It's beautiful Julia," Beckett said as she picked her up. "I'm glad you were able to stay still the whole time."</p>
      <p>"You look great," Castle said. "I think you made an awesome choice."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia said shyly, leaning her other cheek against Beckett's.</p>
      <p>"Okay, why don't we go look and see what games there are now? See if we can win something," Beckett said, kissing Julia's clear cheek. She started to walk when her daughter made her put her down.</p>
      <p>Julia grabbed Beckett's hand, and then reached out to Castle with the other, looking up at him a little shyly before he took it. She then swung their hands at the same time, and squealed a little bit when they lifted her up slightly. Laughing heavily she managed to cry, "Again!" and she laughed harder as they swung her up in the air.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said with a smile when they had reached the midway games. "Pick something you want to try and win sweetie."</p>
      <p>As they walked through the different stalls, Julia looked around at the different stuffed animals on display, but didn't seem to be interested. It was only when they reached a game with glass bowls in the middle did she tug her mother's hand and said, "This Mommy."</p>
      <p>"A fish?" Beckett said, looking at the goldfish swimming around in the middle of the table.</p>
      <p>"Yes, please?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Can we get a bucket?" Castle said after he watched Beckett for a moment. He took it from the worker and handed him some money before saying, "I could tell you were going to say yes."</p>
      <p>"You know me too well," Beckett said, smiling as Castle handed a ping-pong ball to Julia.</p>
      <p>"Is that a bad thing?" Castle said, glancing at her.</p>
      <p>"No. Go ahead and try and throw that sweetie," Beckett said, turning her attention to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Wait, you'll have a better chance this way," Castle said, picking her up then and putting her on his hip.</p>
      <p>Throwing overhand, Julia squeaked in dismay when her ping-pong ball flew across the table and hit the worker on the other side of the table. She buried her face into Castle's shoulder as the man turned and she whispered, "I'm sorry."</p>
      <p>"Here," Beckett said, reaching over for her daughter. She took her and said, "It's alright Julia, you didn't mean to." She then looked over at the worker and called, "Sorry about that."</p>
      <p>"It's alright, I'm just glad I'm not at the milk cans game," the man said, smiling slightly at Julia who was peeking at him from where her face was buried into Beckett's neck.</p>
      <p>"You want to try again?" Castle asked Julia. He wasn't too surprised when she quickly shook her head no and then said to Beckett, "You want to try?"</p>
      <p>"No, that's okay," Beckett said easily. "I probably wouldn't be able to make it into one of those bowls."</p>
      <p>Giving her a look, since he knew she likely would have, Castle didn't reply to that and instead said, "Julia, watch and see if I'm doing a good job okay?" trying to get the little girl to feel better.</p>
      <p>Turning her head, Julia looked on as Castle started to throw the ping-pong balls out to the bowls, hitting the sides of them each time. "Oooh, close!" she said eagerly as one nearly went in the water.</p>
      <p>Seeing that Julia looked a lot happier, Beckett kissed her cheek and watched her as she bounced in her arms slightly. She turned her attention to Castle as he kept on trying to get a goldfish. She saw the bucket of ping-pong balls he'd gotten was almost empty and she said, "Well you're still doing a pretty good job," in case he had really wanted to get a fish for Julia.</p>
      <p>"I can always buy more," Castle said, aiming before he threw one out. He was surprised when it landed in the top of one of the bowls, and he smiled as Julia clapped next to him.</p>
      <p>"Thank you!" Julia cried as she leaned over and hugged him tightly around the neck. "Thank you for my fishy!"</p>
      <p>"You're welcome," Castle said, watching as the worker got the fish out of its bowl and into a plastic bag. "You don't mind having a pet?" he asked Beckett. "Thanks," he said to the worker as he took the bag.</p>
      <p>"No, I think Julia should have one," Beckett said. "And a fish works out really well for our place. Thank you for winning it for her."</p>
      <p>"Not a problem," Castle said as he held the bag up for Julia to look at it. "You get to name it now you know," he told her.</p>
      <p>"Me?" Julia asked. When Castle and Beckett nodded she bit her lower lip and said, "Is it a boy or a girl?"</p>
      <p>Glancing over at the worker, Beckett asked him the same question, being told that it was likely a boy. "So it's a boy, think of a boy name for him if you can sweetie. But you can take your time okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said as they walked on and her mother set her down on the ground. "Now what?"</p>
      <p>"Nothing else except dessert?" Castle asked.<br/>"We've got dessert at home," Beckett said with a smile. "That cake from the bakery you insisted on buying yesterday."</p>
      <p>"Right, so how about one more game before we head to the pet store," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Pet store?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"We need to get some things for your fish," Castle explained. "Why don't you pick a game to play?"</p>
      <p>Looking around, Julia saw one with players trying to get horses on a racetrack to move forward by squirting water at a target. "That one?" she said, pointing to it.</p>
      <p>"Okay, you want to play Castle? My treat," Beckett said with a smile.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle replied, hurrying after them. He watched as Beckett put Julia on her lap and said, "Not fair, there's only one of me."</p>
      <p>"But you're not four years old," Beckett said. "I think this makes it even."</p>
      <p>"Then let the best one win. Julia, my horse is gonna beat yours and your mom's," Castle said, tickling the little girl in the side.</p>
      <p>Giggling heavily, Julia shook her head and said, "No we will win!"</p>
      <p>Beckett quickly got Julia's attention as the game was about to start, and after the bell rang, she hurried to help her daughter get the water to hit the target. She had to watch and make sure Julia was getting the target, so she had no idea how the game had ended until someone reached the finish line. "You won sweetie," she said, looking up and seeing their numbered horse at the end.</p>
      <p>"Was pretty close, but great job Julia," Castle said, smiling as he reached over and tugged one of the braids in her hair gently.</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia said before the worker for the game asked what she wanted for her prize. "Can I have a horsie, a white one?" she asked after looking at the different stuffed animals around the stall.</p>
      <p>"You did pretty good today," Beckett said, walking with her daughter and Castle back to the car.</p>
      <p>"Now what do we do?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"We go to the pet store," Castle said. "And you can pick something out to decorate your fish's tank."</p>
      <p>"I can?" Julia asked enthusiastically.</p>
      <p>"Yes, but it's not going to be a tank Castle, just a bowl," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"A small tank," Castle said. "And since I paid for the bucket of ping-pong balls that won her the fish, I plan on picking out the tank."</p>
      <p>"Okay, but I'll be paying for it," Beckett said. When he shook his head slightly she said warningly, "Castle-"</p>
      <p>"You could have tried to get the fish for her," he pointed out to her.</p>
      <p>Quiet, as she realized that Castle had figured out her plan having him throw the ping-pong balls, Beckett said, "Fine, but I'll buy whatever decoration she decides on."</p>
      <p>"We'll see," Castle said before they reached his car and she had to put Julia into her car seat. When they were situated in the car, he drove them to the pet store that was halfway between the park and the beach house and got Julia out for Beckett. "You're really going to like this store," he told her as he held her hand, waiting for her mother to come around the car. "They have a ton of different pets; you can spend hours here looking."</p>
      <p>"Do they have horsies?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"No, but they do have some puppies, and cats," Castle said as Beckett took Julia's other hand and they went up to the store. "And my favorite, birds."</p>
      <p>"You like birds?" Beckett asked as he held the door open for them.</p>
      <p>"The parrots? Yeah, those are pretty cool," Castle said. "Always wanted to get one and teach it bad words in a different language, that way people wouldn't know what it was saying."</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said. "Why don't you go and check them out?"</p>
      <p>"I'll stick with you guys," Castle said, taking her hand as Julia was running ahead of them and looking at the puppies.</p>
      <p>It took a long time for Beckett and Castle to get Julia over to the fish supplies, as the little girl would not let them take her away from the dogs and cats. But they finally made it over to the aisles and Castle helped Julia pick out a tank large enough for her goldfish, and then let her lead them over to the items to decorate the tank with.</p>
      <p>"How about this?" Castle asked, showing Julia some light blue pebbles to line the bottom of the tank.</p>
      <p>"Yes, please," Julia said before she looked at the different statues. She looked them over a few times before she saw one of Stitch, on a surfboard. "Mommy, this one?" she asked Beckett eagerly.</p>
      <p>"How about this one Julia?" Castle said then, showing her another figurine, of the three main characters of the same movie; including Stitch; on a surfboard.</p>
      <p>"Oooh, Mommy, please?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes, it's perfect," Beckett said. She followed Julia and Castle as they went to the register, smiling at her daughter and how much a difference the past week had made, her daughter saying different names for her fish and asking him what he thought.</p>
      <p>After Castle had an employee set up the tank to put the goldfish in, he carried it out to his car, following Beckett as Julia walked next to him, jumping up and down every so often to check on her fish.</p>
      <p>"Mommy will he be okay?" Julia asked worriedly as she got into her car seat.</p>
      <p>"He'll be fine, I promise," Beckett assured her. "I'll make sure to hold onto his tank tightly the whole drive." She finished buckling the little girl in and asked, "Did you think of a name yet?" When Julia shook her head no she quickly said, "That's okay, take your time sweetie, I'm sure you'll think of a great name." She closed the door and turned to Castle saying, "I thought winning a goldfish might help elevate you in her eyes."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, you weren't kidding about that," Castle said, walking around to the passenger side with her. "But I was glad to get it for her, looks like she's an animal lover."</p>
      <p>"She is, I'm thinking of buying an annual pass to the Central Park Zoo for us, she always wants to go there," Beckett said with a smile. She sat down then in the passenger seat, and took the tank from Castle as he handed it to her. "It's okay Julia," she said quickly when she heard her daughter start to speak. "He's just fine," she said absently as she checked on the fish.</p>
      <p>The drive back to the beach house was punctuated by Julia suggesting names every so often, and Castle and Beckett telling her what they thought. When they got inside the house, Castle set the fish tank on the coffee table in the family room and he and Beckett sat on the couch, watching as the little girl sat on her knees on the floor, watching the fish.</p>
      <p>"So what do you want to do now Julia?" Beckett finally asked, picking her daughter up and putting her on her lap.</p>
      <p>"Can we go to the pool?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Sure, but I need to wash off the butterfly," Beckett said, touching the painting on the side of her face. "That way it doesn't wash off in the water."</p>
      <p>"Kay, but I won't remember it," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Let me take a picture," Beckett said, about to put Julia on the couch so she could grab her camera. She was a little surprised when Castle got up, and she watched him walk back to the kitchen where she'd put it. "Thank you," she said when he came back with it in his hand. She quickly took a picture of Julia's cheek before she took her upstairs to change, smiling behind her as Castle scrambled to follow them.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Julia, don't run," Castle said as he watched the little girl hurry out of the pool and then around to where he was standing in the middle of the pool. "I'm not going anywhere."</p>
      <p>"Sorry," Julia said before she went to the edge in front of where he was standing. "Can I jump now?"</p>
      <p>"I'm ready," Castle said, watching as she jumped off the edge and he quickly caught her. He let her go under the water before picking her up out of it. "Fun?" he asked as she rubbed the water from her face.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, again?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Why don't we let Castle take a break," Beckett said, resurfacing in time to hear her daughter's question. "And you can swim with me a little."</p>
      <p>"Kay, do I put on my vest?" Julia asked as Castle gave her to her mother. She wrapped her arms around Beckett's neck and kicked her legs in the water slightly. "Is my fishy kay alone Mommy?" she asked her as Beckett had her stand on the outside of the pool while she sat on the top step.</p>
      <p>"I'm sure he's fine," Beckett said, quickly putting on the vest before buckling it up.</p>
      <p>"We fed him before we came out here," Castle said, swimming up to them. "So if I were him I'd just take a nap now. Your mom's right, he's probably doing great."</p>
      <p>"Okay, remember to try and kick your legs at the same time as you move your arms," Beckett said, helping Julia onto the first step before picking her up. She went past the steps a little before stopping and letting go of the little girl. She was pleased when Julia quickly started to kick her legs; in the six days since she'd first gone into the pool, her daughter was a lot more confident in the water which was a relief. "Ready?" she asked the little girl, seeing Castle swimming up on the other side of Julia. When the little girl nodded she let go of her completely and watched to make sure she was moving herself through the water.</p>
      <p>"Try and move your arms under the water Julia," Castle said quickly as she was more splashing than moving. "Remember you can swim like a dog would, it moves you around." He took her hands and pulled them under the water slightly, watching as she tried moving them without going out of the water, moving forward.</p>
      <p>"Try and stay above the water sweetie," Beckett said, pushing her up slightly since she had her hands under the little girl to give her support. "There you go, let's go into the deep end okay?"</p>
      <p>Julia nodded slowly, still trying to concentrate on her swimming, but she felt her mother's hands underneath her, keeping her from sinking. She was able to keep swimming ahead until the middle of the pool when she began to have a hard time keeping her head above the water.</p>
      <p>"I've got you," Castle said, grabbing her quickly since he'd been watching her closely. He handed her over to Beckett and watched as she kissed her daughter's temple as she walked back up to the steps.</p>
      <p>"She'll sleep really well tonight," Beckett commented as she took off Julia's vest before the little girl hopped up and down on the top step.</p>
      <p>"Can I go down one more?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"One more," Beckett said. "You sure you don't want a nap?"</p>
      <p>"No, I want to stay here," Julia said. "Like my fishy in his water."</p>
      <p>"A little more," Beckett said firmly as she sat down on the first step. "And then we need to go inside so we can get dinner ready."</p>
      <p>"So I can," Castle said, swimming up after doing a quick lap around the pool. "I'll make you my famous fondue."</p>
      <p>"Really? How come I've never heard of it before if it's famous?" Beckett asked teasingly as Julia asked what it was.</p>
      <p>"Julia, I want you to wait and see what it is okay?" Castle asked. When she nodded he turned to his girlfriend and said, "I just make it here, it's kind of a summer tradition for us."</p>
      <p>"I'm interested in tasting it," Beckett said with a smile before she stood up. "Come on Julia, let's get you dried off."</p>
      <p>"Kay, I wanna see my fishy!" Julia cried out.</p>
      <p>"Did you think of a name yet?" Castle asked when they were drying off with towels.</p>
      <p>"No…" Julia said slowly as her mother undid the braids in her hair.</p>
      <p>"Stop sweetie, I need to dry off your hair and I can't do that when it's in braids," Beckett said as the little girl tried to stop her. She dried off her hair as quickly as she could before wrapping Julia's towel around the little girl and picking her up; her own towel wrapped around her waist.</p>
      <p>Inside the house, they split up on the second floor, Beckett taking Julia to her room and Castle going to his. Afterwards he went over to Julia's room and watched as Beckett quickly braided her daughter's hair. "Think she can help me with dinner Kate?" he said.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett replied. "But you be careful Julia," she said as her daughter ran over to Castle in the doorway.</p>
      <p>"I promise Mommy," Julia said before Castle picked her up to her squeal of surprise.</p>
      <p>"I'll be down as soon as I finish," Beckett said to her daughter. "And I'll check on your fish while I look at my e-mails okay?"</p>
      <p>"I want to too!" Julia cried as they stopped at the top of the stairs.</p>
      <p>"I'll take you before we go into the kitchen," Castle promised. "Why don't you try and think of some more names?"</p>
      <p>Beckett stayed where she was, watching as the two went down, Julia asking him what his name was; since she had told her daughter a long time before Castle wasn't his first name. She smiled and then turned, heading down the hall as she kept an ear out for them, knowing they were in the family room.</p>
      <p>"He's a pretty fishy isn't he?" Julia said as she peeked at her goldfish, seeing it was swimming around the figurine on the bottom.</p>
      <p>"He is, but Julia, you don't have to give him my name," Castle said. "Let him have an interesting name."</p>
      <p>"What's that mean?" Julia asked, standing up.</p>
      <p>"It means something different, in this case, not a name other people would give their fish," Castle said, leading her over to the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Julia said as she stood against one of the cabinet doors while she watched him gathering everything for dinner. "What can I do?" she asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Well, you can help me by setting the table. Think you can do that?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I'm big enough, I'm four!" Julia said, holding up four fingers.</p>
      <p>"You're right, let me get the plates for you, and set them on the table so you don't have to carry them all at once," Castle said with a smile. He then quickly grabbed the plates, forks and napkins, carrying them to the table as Julia skipped after him as fast as she could. "Okay, if you need any help, just tell me and I'll come over," he told her.</p>
      <p>"I will," Julia said before she grabbed the first plate off the table and walked around to one of the chairs, putting it down in front of it before she ran around to the last two. She was so focused on getting everything put in its place that she didn't hear her mother until she was finished and she was being lifted up. "Mommy!" she cried as she turned around and threw her arms around her mother's neck. "I set the table, all by myself," she told her proudly, pointing to the table.</p>
      <p>"You did a great job sweetie," Beckett replied, kissing her cheek. She then looked over at Castle who was standing at the stove and said, "It smells great."</p>
      <p>"Wait until it's finished to try it out," he replied, smiling as Julia tangled her fingers around Beckett's hair.</p>
      <p>"We'll be in the family room," Beckett said before she turned. "Tell me, how's your fish?" she asked her daughter.</p>
      <p>Castle smiled a little and then turned around to the island, where he was cutting up different foods to dip into the melted cheese. He quickly straightened out the bread and listened to the soft murmur of Beckett and Julia's voices coming to him.</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said after she and her mother had been quiet for a few minutes. When her mother made a noise of affirmation, she quickly said, "I think I got a name for my fishy."</p>
      <p>"Oh, yeah? Tell me," Beckett asked, looking at her daughter who had her head on her arms that were crossed on the table. "Come here first though before you do," she said quickly, since she could tell the little girl was tired.</p>
      <p>"I wanna name him…" Julia began to say before she sighed and closed her eyes, snuggled up against her mother. She fell asleep before she could tell her the name she had picked out, and pressed her cheek tighter against her.</p>
      <p>Smiling as she watched Julia abruptly fall asleep, Beckett stroked her hair gently, pressing her cheek to the top of the little girl's head. She stayed perfectly still, not the first time Julia had taken a nap like that, until she could hear Castle walking up behind her. "I'm just letting her have a quick nap," she said as he walked around the couch.</p>
      <p>"Figured the swimming at least would wear her out," Castle said, sitting down carefully next to her.</p>
      <p>"It was funny though, she thought of a name for her fish, but fell asleep right before she said it," Beckett said, looking down at her. "I guess we'll have to wait and see."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, do you mind; if she picks my name; if I persuade her not to?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I will, it would be a little confusing if you had the same name as a fish," Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"Don't you mean that the other way around?" Castle asked. When she merely smiled at him he shook his head and said, "You are very evil."</p>
      <p>"It was a great set up though, thank you," Beckett said before she gently started to shake Julia awake. "Sweetie, come on, I think dinner's ready and you need to name your fish," she said, as her daughter tried to fall back asleep.</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia whined as she finally opened her eyes. She yawned and rubbed her right eye before looking at her mother and Castle. "Don't wanna get up."</p>
      <p>"I know, but if I let you sleep, you'd never go to sleep tonight," Beckett said. "And you need to after last night."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia yawned.</p>
      <p>"So what name did you think of for your fish?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Oh! I'm gonna call him Kauai," Julia said proudly, looking at the goldfish.</p>
      <p>"That's a good name," Beckett said, kissing her temple. "I don't think I've ever heard a fish called that."</p>
      <p>"Yeah?" Julia asked. When Beckett nodded she smiled and hugged her saying, "Thank you Mommy." She then looked at Castle and asked, "Is it inter… inter…"</p>
      <p>"Interesting," Castle said. "It is, your mom's right, never heard a pet called that before. Why that name?"</p>
      <p>"That's where Lilo lived and Stitch landed there in his ship," Julia explained.</p>
      <p>"Makes sense," Castle said with a nod. "Are you hungry now you got his name?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can I take Kauai to the table Mommy?" Julia asked excitedly as her mother and Castle stood.</p>
      <p>"Actually I think he'd prefer to stay here for now, so he can have his dinner," Beckett said, setting Julia down. She helped her feed the goldfish before they went to wash their hands and sat at the table with Castle.</p>
      <p>"What do I do Mommy?" Julia asked, picking up the fork for the fondue.</p>
      <p>"Pick something you want," Becket said, choosing a piece of bread. "And then dip it into the cheese like this," she showed her daughter. "And then you eat it. But please be very careful because the cheese is hot."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, leaning over and choosing a piece of bread with the fork before she dipped it carefully in the cheese, and then put it on her plate before blowing on it.</p>
      <p>"Okay, enough sweetie, you're going to hyperventilate and I think it's cool enough now!" Beckett said quickly.</p>
      <p>Julia carefully ate the piece of bread, checking at first to see if it was still hot. When she finished she asked her mother, "What does that mean?"</p>
      <p>"Hyperventilate?" Beckett asked. When Julia nodded she said, "It means you're going to get too dizzy. But what do you think?"</p>
      <p>"Can I have more?" Julia asked, bouncing a little on her knees on the chair.</p>
      <p>"Yes, pick what you want," Beckett said, taking her fork before getting a piece of chicken at Julia's direction. She had to wait for Castle to dip his fork in, and then asked, "A kabob?"</p>
      <p>"What? We'll be here all night if we do everything individually," Castle said simply. "Nice huh?" he asked Julia who was watching his fork with wide eyes.</p>
      <p>"Want me to put a piece of potato on here too?" Beckett asked her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Please," Julia said before watching her mother closely.</p>
      <p>"Did you have any kind of plans for tomorrow?" Castle asked after they'd been eating for a while and he was picking up some chicken covered in cheese from his plate.</p>
      <p>"I think we should take her to the beach, but other than that I don't really have any idea what we could do," Beckett said. "What do you want to do Julia?" she asked, turning to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Can we have a picnic?" Julia asked. "With this fondue," she said, dragging out the f in fondue a little too long.</p>
      <p>"Thought she was about to say something else," Castle said, as Beckett had to cover her mouth before she started to laugh.</p>
      <p>"Did I say it wrong?" Julia asked a little worriedly.</p>
      <p>"No, no, you don't have to say it exactly like that though," Beckett said, wiping off her daughter's mouth with her napkin. "So you want to go on a picnic?"</p>
      <p>"Here at the beach?" Castle said.</p>
      <p>"You have something else in mind?" Beckett asked, recognizing in his tone of voice he'd thought of something.</p>
      <p>"There's a trail, outside town, in the woods," Castle said. "I've gone a couple times with Alexis, walking through the paths, there's a stream that runs along it and unless they did some landscaping, wild berries that grow there. But don't hold me to that, it's been years since we went."</p>
      <p>"It sounds interesting," Beckett said, watching Julia. "And it would be nice to take her into the woods, she's never been."</p>
      <p>"We can try tomorrow morning before it gets too hot," Castle said. "What do you think Julia?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said absently, swirling her fork around the plate, making patterns in the melted cheese that was there.</p>
      <p>"Are you done?" Beckett asked, taking the fork out of her hand.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can I see if Kauai finished his dinner?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Go ahead," Beckett said, taking her out of her chair. "But stay there with him please," she called as the little girl ran out of the room and down the hall. "Is the trail safe?" she asked as she and Castle started to clear the table.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, nothing really to worry about except for some squirrels jumping onto your hair," Castle said. He noticed that Beckett had stopped walking behind him to the kitchen and he turned saying, "I was just kidding."</p>
      <p>"I thought that might have happened to you," Beckett said, a slight smirk on her face. "Going by your luck."</p>
      <p>"I know, surprising," Castle said before he laughed as she shook her head and they continued walking.</p>
      <p>When they had finished clearing the table and washing the dishes and utensils, Beckett walked ahead of Castle to the family room, wondering why it was so quiet. She froze in the doorway to the room, seeing that her daughter was not there and neither was the Stitch doll that had been on the table next to the fish tank. "Julia!" she said, turning and nearly running into Castle.</p>
      <p>"She's not there?" he asked in shock, looking past her before Beckett pushed past him. He saw the room was empty, and he turned saying, "I'll check the rooms here," as she started up the stairs, calling her daughter's name. He was a little surprised at the fear that had appeared on her face, but knew why that was. He started to go over to the foyer when he looked outside, and he hurried over to the glass doors. Cupping his hands over the glass, he saw in the moonlight a small figure swinging their legs on one of the white chairs.</p>
      <p>"She's not up here, did you find her?" Beckett asked breathlessly as she ran down the stairs.</p>
      <p>"She's outside," Castle said. He reached out and grabbed Beckett's wrist before she could take hold of the doorknob, and said, "Before you go out to her you need to calm down Kate."</p>
      <p>"What?" Beckett said in surprise.</p>
      <p>"You're going to scare her," Castle said firmly. "I don't think she knows she did anything wrong, and it's going to give her the wrong idea about going outside if she sees you terrified that she did."</p>
      <p>Realizing quickly that he was right, Beckett nodded and tried to calm down before he opened the door. She sighed deeply hearing her daughter singing to herself, and she took another minute before she stepped outside. "Julia," she said gently when they had reached her. "How come you came out here?" she asked carefully.</p>
      <p>"I wanted to see stars," Julia said with a smile. "And look, there's lots and lots."</p>
      <p>"There are," Beckett said, picking her up so she could sit down. She put Julia on her lap as Castle sat in the other chair, hugging her tightly to her. "But next time let me know you want to do that okay?"</p>
      <p>"Why?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"That way I can come with you, I wanted to look at the stars too," Beckett said, stroking her hair gently. She kissed her daughter's forehead and then rocked side to side a little.</p>
      <p>"Mommy I don't wanna sleep yet," Julia protested her mother's movements.</p>
      <p>"Oh, sorry," Beckett said, quickly coming back to herself. She smiled a little at Julia and said as the little girl grabbed a strand of her hair, "What do you want to do now?"</p>
      <p>"Stay here," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Why don't I make us some hot chocolate?" Castle said, sensing that Beckett wanted to be alone with her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Oh, please?" Julia asked, grabbing her mother's hand.</p>
      <p>"Sure, thank you Castle," Beckett said. She smiled as he squeezed her shoulder slightly in passing, and she leaned back against the chair, breathing out a little too loudly.</p>
      <p>"Are you kay Mommy?" Julia asked, wrapping her arms around her.</p>
      <p>"Don't worry sweetie," Beckett said, stroking her hair gently. "Were you having fun watching the stars?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Stitch likes them, he told me where he came from before he went to H'waii," Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Where's that?" Beckett asked. She smiled when her daughter pointed up and said, "Must have been a long trip."</p>
      <p>"He said it was fast in his spaceship," Julia said happily. "But he likes it here, and he likes my fishy too."</p>
      <p>"You introduced him to Kauai?" Beckett asked as Julia slid off her lap.</p>
      <p>"He wanted to see who the fish was," Julia said, swaying a little with her Stitch doll in her arms. "And I told him not to eat it, Kauai's not to eat," she said, looking down at the doll and looking stern.</p>
      <p>"Of course not, I'm sure he'll listen to you," Beckett said, feeling better watching her. She gathered Julia in her arms and hugged her tightly.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, you're squishing Stitch on me," Julia complained after her mother kept hugging her.</p>
      <p>"Oh, sorry," Beckett said, letting her go. "Is he okay?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, straightening the doll's large ears. She looked up and saw Castle coming over with some mugs on a tray and called, "Is that the chocolate?"</p>
      <p>"This one is," Castle said once he'd reached them. "I made coffee for you Kate."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said, picking up her cup. She took a few sips as she watched Julia blowing on her hot chocolate a few times before Castle stopped her.</p>
      <p>"Better let it sit," he told the little girl who nodded seriously. He smiled and then said, "I checked on your fish before I came out."<br/>"Is he okay?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"He's doing good," Castle said. "I think he likes his new home a lot."<br/>"I would better than a bowl everyone kept hitting ping-pong balls against," Beckett said wryly.</p>
      <p>"Can I drink now Mommy?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Let me see," Beckett said before she picked up Julia's mug. "Really Castle? Do you not want her to go to sleep tonight?" she asked him, looking at the pile of whipped cream on the hot chocolate.</p>
      <p>"Don't be mad Mommy," Julia said quickly, leaning against her leg. "He tried to be nice."</p>
      <p>"I'm not mad, that's just a lot of whipped cream," Beckett said before she took a sip. "Okay, it's cool enough for you to sip, but not a lot at once." She watched as Julia managed to get her face in the whipped cream while she took a drink, and laughed softly as her nose was covered when she pulled away. "I hope it's good," she said, quickly wiping her daughter's face with a napkin on the tray.</p>
      <p>Julia nodded and then started to climb up on her mother before Beckett picked her up and put her on her lap. She sighed and then snuggled against her, shaking a little.</p>
      <p>"Cold?" Beckett asked, looking down at her. "Here, drink some more of the chocolate," she said, still holding the mug.</p>
      <p>The three fell silent then, watching the foam of the breaking waves in front of them they could see in the moonlight, before Beckett suddenly stood up.</p>
      <p>"She's asleep?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I think everything today was too much," Beckett said. "At least I hope so. I really don't want her to have another nightmare."</p>
      <p>"Maybe this last week we'll get lucky and she won't," Castle said as they walked back up to the house.</p>
      <p>"Hard to believe the first week is over already," Beckett said with a sigh. "Though I do want to get back to work, I've been enjoying the time with Julia a lot."</p>
      <p>"Me too, it's been fun," Castle said as they headed upstairs. He followed Beckett to Julia's room, waiting until after she had changed her daughter into her pajamas before he went inside.</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia asked fuzzily, waking up as Beckett laid her back.</p>
      <p>"Shh, don't worry sweetie," Beckett said soothingly. "I'm just tucking you in bed. Get some sleep okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia sighed before she reached from under the sheet towards her mother.</p>
      <p>Beckett hugged Julia tightly before she shared a kiss with her and settled her back. She sat there next to the little girl for a while, stroking her hair gently as she watched her fall asleep. She nearly jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder, and looked up at Castle.</p>
      <p>"Let her get some sleep, she could use it," he whispered, smiling slightly.</p>
      <p>Nodding, Beckett stood up and left the room, closing the door behind her before she went down to the kitchen, pouring herself another cup of coffee.</p>
      <p>"Come on," Castle said after he'd poured himself some more as well. He took her hand and led her outside to the gazebo. He sat down, watching as she remained standing, not saying a word.</p>
      <p>"It was like I was back in the basement of my building again," Beckett said. "At the end of April, walking down that hallway, trying to get to Julia. But I couldn't see her, so I wasn't sure if I wasn't being diverted while they took her. Of course at the time I didn't know they wanted me too. But I felt horrible, thinking I had lost her," she said, finally sitting next to him.</p>
      <p>"I know how that can feel," Castle said slowly. "Not exactly the same situation, but remember I told you about losing Alexis shopping?"</p>
      <p>"I do, and I really wish my losing her was the same situation, not trying to find her at gunpoint," Beckett said. "But I felt like I was there again when I was running upstairs. The same fear… I didn't even think about her going outside. I think I wanted to look in her room and find here there, playing with her doll."</p>
      <p>"That's normal for parents," Castle said quickly. "That fear of losing your child. But in your case it's a lot worse, because of everything you had to go through."</p>
      <p>"I'm trying to be rational in my mind," Beckett sighed. "Telling myself that it won't happen again, Harris and his men are gone, she's safe. But kids get taken all the time and I want to keep her close, keep her safe."</p>
      <p>"Which makes you a good parent," Castle said calmly, taking her hand then. "But she'll be alright Kate. You've enrolled her in one of the safest schools in the city, and you know my building is secure too. She'll be okay."</p>
      <p>"I know, I've been talking with my psychiatrist about that, my fears about Julia," Beckett said, squeezing his hand gently. "He's reminded me of that, and said considering what we went through he's surprised I didn't quit my job and just keep Julia at home."</p>
      <p>"He doesn't know how you are as a mother, and you are not how Julia's birth mother was," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I know, I told him the same thing. Basically the thought of keeping her locked up from the world is what's helping me from worrying too much, but it never stops," Beckett said. "Just… it was not fun to look into that room and find it empty."<br/>"I know, I was worried too," Castle said. "But she's okay, and hopefully you will be too."</p>
      <p>"I think I will be," Beckett said, turning her head to look out at the water for a moment before she sat back, glancing at him.</p>
      <p>"Want to take a walk?" Castle asked. "I'm sure Julia will be fine," he said as she glanced up at the house.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said as she stood up with him, leaving their mugs on the railing. She took his hand as they walked down to the sand and only let go of him to take off her shoes as he did the same. They walked down to the water and as they stood in the breaking waves she said, "You never really lose those fears about your child do you?"</p>
      <p>"No, but when your kid gets older it lessens," Castle said. "Slightly, very slightly, but you won't always worry about her. At least not in the same way."</p>
      <p>Smiling, since she knew he was referencing himself at that point, Beckett let go of his hand wrapped her arms around him. "Thank you," she said.</p>
      <p>"For what?" Castle asked, looking a little taken aback.</p>
      <p>"For the help," Beckett said. "Which I know I've said before, but really, I don't know many other parents so I can't talk about this with many other people."</p>
      <p>"True, but you are doing pretty well on your own," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Thanks," Beckett said, pressing her cheek to his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. "You know," she said after they were quiet for a while, letting the water wash over their feet. "I was going to ask about the night before last."</p>
      <p>"Yes, the night before last," Castle said absently, kissing her neck gently then. He then seemed to understand what she said and he raised his head. "What about it?" he asked.</p>
      <p>"I think an encore would be nice right now," Beckett said before letting go of him. "Or we can do something a little different."</p>
      <p>"Different how?" Castle said as his mouth went a little dry.</p>
      <p>"Maybe a duet," Beckett said. "Since last time I was on my own." She smiled as his eyes went wide, and she turned, walking up to the grass. "Coming?" she asked, turning to look at him.</p>
      <p>"Absolutely," Castle said, hurrying up after her before he wrapped his arm around her waist. He kissed her before she could start walking, and when they parted, pressed his lips to her neck a few times. He wasn't too surprised when she pushed him away from her gently, smiling at him before walking ahead of him and to the house.</p>
      <p>Knowing that he was watching her as he followed her, Beckett paused in the doorway and looked back at him. She wasn't surprised when he hurried up the steps to her, and she wrapped her arms around him before he took her in his and they kissed deeply. When they forced themselves to finally stop, she took his hand and they entered the house, Castle closing and locking the door behind him before she led him to the stairs.</p>
      <p>Their fingers entwined, Castle and Beckett checked on Julia quickly before heading down to the other end of the hall. Inside the room, the door closed and locked firmly after them before they became caught up in a heavy kiss and tight embrace, everything outside the room fading until they focused intently; gladly; on one another.</p>
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<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Dance Around Tonight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>There are a couple of lyrics in this chapter from the song This Song by George Harrison, from his album Thirty-Three &amp; 1/3.</p><p>The title of this chapter is a lyric from the song Dance Tonight by Paul McCartney, from his album Memory Almost Full.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>"Julia, sweetie, come here," Beckett said, motioning to her daughter as she stood in the doorway to the back. When Julia had run up to her she hugged her tightly and said, "Why don't I give you a bath now, that way tonight we can watch the show without worrying about how late it'll be after?"</p>
      <p>"Kay, but I wanna see Kauai," Julia said eagerly, wrapping her beach towel around her.</p>
      <p>"That's fine, go ahead and I'll go and see what Castle's doing," Beckett said before letting Julia run to the family room. She watched to make sure the girl went into the right room before she headed over to the study.</p>
      <p>"You didn't need to knock," Castle said, turning from his laptop and seeing the rap on the doorframe was Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Just in case," Beckett said simply as she stepped inside. "You've been in here for almost an hour, writing?"</p>
      <p>"No, I wasn't planning on writing this vacation," Castle reminded her as she sat in the other desk chair he had in the room. "I was trying to get some things settled."</p>
      <p>"What, with Vinnie 'The Scar?'" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"No," Castle said slowly. "I don't think he'll forgive me for that… No, I was actually on the phone with a friend of mine, getting this set," he said, handing a piece of paper to her.</p>
      <p>Reading what was an e-mail, Beckett was a little confused seeing it said something about five tickets and October. She quickly looked at the next page and saw it was a receipt for 5 tickets to Citi Field on the fourth of October for the Paul McCartney concert that night. "You bought tickets to Paul McCartney," she said, her eyes wide as she looked up at him.</p>
      <p>"Front row," Castle said with a pleased smile on his face.</p>
      <p>"How… I've been trying to get tickets since I adopted Julia," Beckett said, dropping her voice to a whisper. "And even the seats in the upper tiers were sold out."</p>
      <p>"I have a connection, and at first while we were talking there were only two tickets," Castle explained. "And I thought I'd just give them to you and Julia for an early Christmas present. But then as we were getting my card information set, my friend found out a group of ten cancelled their tickets, and I picked up three of those for myself, Alexis and my mother. If you don't mind sitting with us."</p>
      <p>"No, I just… I'm not even sure what to say," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Just that you'll let Julia go," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said. "Thank you, so much. I think I'm going to owe you a lot for this."</p>
      <p>"Well, I like his music too, so it's not like I'm not going to enjoy the concert," Castle said. "That reminds me, I think I want to buy a vinyl of one of his albums, we can try and get him to sign it at the end of the concert."</p>
      <p>"You don't need to, I bought her a copy of <em>Memory Almost Full</em> in vinyl," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"You did? Why that album?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"We were looking at his official website, and they were having a sale on his vinyl records, I let her choose which one she wanted," Beckett said. "I don't know if she had the idea of him signing it when she chose it, but it will help."</p>
      <p>"She made a good choice though, that's a great album," Castle said, looking past Beckett.</p>
      <p>Turning to follow his gaze, Beckett smiled as she saw her daughter was peeking around the doorway. "Come here sweetie," she said. "Castle has some good news for you."</p>
      <p>Julia hurried into the room and got on Beckett's lap before she turned to him expectantly.</p>
      <p>"Are you sure you don't want to tell her?" Castle asked. When Beckett didn't reply, he turned to the little girl and said, "I came back inside from the beach because I wanted to see if I could get something for you and your mom. See that paper in your mom's hand? Those are tickets to see Paul's concert at Citi-"</p>
      <p>"Shea Stadium," both Beckett and Julia corrected at the same time.</p>
      <p>"Right," Castle said slowly. "Shea Stadium. Anyways, we're going to see him, in the front row."</p>
      <p>"Does that mean we're close?" Julia asked, her green eyes growing wide.</p>
      <p>"As close as you can get without being in the band," Castle said. He laughed with Beckett when Julia started to bounce up and down, squealing in joy. "So I guess that means you want to go," he said.</p>
      <p>"Yes, oh please, Mommy, can we go?" Julia asked enthusiastically.</p>
      <p>"Definitely, but Castle, Alexis and Martha are going to go too," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Good, we all can see Paul!" Julia said firmly. "Mommy, Mommy, how many days until we can see him?"</p>
      <p>"Easy sweetie," Beckett said, holding the little girl steady. "We've still got another month and a couple of weeks, so about forty days."</p>
      <p>"Too many," Julia said, sighing heavily and slumping against her mother. She then looked up at Castle and said shyly, "Thank you for letting us go see Paul."</p>
      <p>"You're welcome," Castle said with a smile. "I wanted you to get the chance to see him. And I won't lie, I did too."</p>
      <p>"Does Alexis want to?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"I'm sure she'll be happy to go, my mother will too," Castle said. "You know how much she loves The Beatles, and of course Paul, despite the whole rumors about him…" He trailed off as Beckett shook her head quickly at him and he said swiftly, "So your mom told me you have a record of Paul's."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, it has a big chair on it," Julia said. "And it has <em>Dance Tonight</em> on it. My favorite." She then gasped and said to her mother as fast as she could, "Can we take it so Paul can sign it? Please?"</p>
      <p>"That's a great idea," Castle said after Beckett had said yes. "Wish I had thought of it." He stood up then as Beckett had picked Julia up and said, "So I'll tell Alexis later when I call her about the concert, see how they react."</p>
      <p>"Can we go back to the beach Mommy? Castle can come with us now right?" Julia asked, looking at him.</p>
      <p>"I definitely can," he answered. "And we've still got a while of daylight left."</p>
      <p>"I was going to give her a bath now," Beckett said. "I thought you were finished with the beach," she told Castle. "But," she said as Julia groaned in disappointment. "We could go for a little longer before we eat dinner."</p>
      <p>"And then what Mommy, watch the show?" Julia asked, bouncing in Beckett's arms before she put her down.</p>
      <p>"I don't think it's going to be on right when we finish," Beckett said. "So we'll see what we can do until then." She set her daughter down and they followed Castle back out to the beach where they set down their beach towels before going into the water together.</p>
      <p>"Sure she doesn't need her vest?" Castle asked as Julia jumped up and down eagerly, splashing them.</p>
      <p>"I don't think I'll let her go too deep," Beckett said, keeping an eye on her daughter as she ran down the beach a little away from them. "Julia, stay closer," she called before she could go any further.</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, running back and then sitting down on the sand as the next wave coming in broke around her. She ran her fingers through the sand and looked up as her mother sat down, Castle following her a moment after. "You copied me," she giggled.</p>
      <p>"It looked like you were having fun sweetie," Beckett said, rubbing her back.</p>
      <p>"Ew, my hands are dirty," Julia said as she took her hands from under the water and saw they were covered in wet sand.</p>
      <p>"Try picking it up in your hands," Castle said. "Like this," he said as he dug his hands under the water and picked up the sand, letting the wet muck it made run through his fingers.</p>
      <p>"Again!" Julia cried, getting up on her knees and clapping her hands.</p>
      <p>"Try it with me," Castle urged her. He smiled as Julia quickly did so, and he watched her fling the wet sand into the water.</p>
      <p>"Now what do I do?" Julia asked her mother, showing her her dirty hands.</p>
      <p>"Put them under the water," Beckett said. She was surprised when her daughter lay back in the wave and she said laughingly, "Not what I meant, but it's one way to do it."</p>
      <p>"Are you going to make sand angels? I have to tell you Julia, it probably won't work, you'd need to go up out of the water," Castle teased her, tickling her side and making her giggle.</p>
      <p>"What are those?" Julia asked, sitting up.</p>
      <p>"Sand angels?" Castle said. "They're like snow angels." He then remembered; as Julia looked at him in confusion still; that she had probably never made a snow angel in her life, and he hurriedly said, "I can show you."</p>
      <p>Jumping up, Julia followed Castle to the wet sand right in front of where the waves were breaking, and watched as he cleared the shells. "Why do you do that?" she asked interestedly.</p>
      <p>"Because I think your mom would be mad if you got a cut from a shell," Castle said. "Okay, lie down, and move your arms and legs up and down."</p>
      <p>Julia lay down in the sand, and moved her arms up and down before her mother moved her legs. Getting it then, she moved her limbs at the same time and then let Beckett pick her up. "Oooh, it's an angel!" she said, seeing the shape in the sand.</p>
      <p>"Not bad," Castle said. "When winter comes you should try to do it in the snow."</p>
      <p>"Will you show me then?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Castle said. "If your mom lets you out in the cold."</p>
      <p>"I will, and it'll be a lot better for her to do it in the snow, her hair won't get full of it that I'll need to wash out," Beckett said, running her fingers through Julia's hair in an effort to get the sand out of it. "I think it's time we headed inside anyways," she said after giving up trying to get her daughter's scalp cleaned.</p>
      <p>"Are we gonna eat? I'm hungry Mommy," Julia said as they walked back up to their beach towels.</p>
      <p>"After we change, and you get a bath," Beckett said. "Why don't we let her pick what to eat this time?" she asked Castle as they walked up to the house, wrapped up in their towels.</p>
      <p>"Sure you want to do that," Castle asked, one eyebrow raised. "She might pick something like mac and cheese."</p>
      <p>"Julia," Beckett said, looking down at her. "What would you like to have for dinner?"</p>
      <p>"Can we go to the place with the old, old cars?" Julia asked after thinking for a minute.</p>
      <p>"<em>The Studebaker</em>," Castle said. "You noticed the cars while we were passing yesterday."</p>
      <p>"Where was that?" Beckett asked in slight confusion. "And why am I not remembering?"</p>
      <p>"You were answering that text from your dad," Castle said as they headed up to the second floor. "And it's towards the outside of town, just a nostalgic kind of diner, every night during summer they have a car show. So if you'd like to go we can check out the cars."</p>
      <p>"Sounds good, I think I know what Julia will want to wear," Beckett said, smiling down at her daughter who looked eager.</p>
      <p>"Great I can't wait to see," Castle said. "And you'll have to explain that statement later on when we're ready."</p>
      <p>"I will," Beckett said with a laugh before she led Julia over to her room.</p>
      <p>Shaking his head, Castle turned and went down the other end of the hall before he glanced back at Beckett and Julia. He smiled slightly as the little girl waved at him and he quickly gave her a little wave in return before he continued on to his room.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"So do I still need to explain what I was talking about earlier?" Beckett asked as she hurried down the stairs after showering and changing last.</p>
      <p>"No, I got it as soon as I saw her," Castle said, nodding to Julia who was standing on the porch of the house. "And you just brought that randomly?"</p>
      <p>"Well she loves plaids and this one was a recent purchase. She hasn't been able to wear it yet," Beckett said. "I told her it could easily double as her Halloween costume."</p>
      <p>"Are we going now Mommy?" Julia asked excitedly as she turned to the house and saw her mother walking up to her.</p>
      <p>"Right now sweetie," Beckett said, straightening Julia's blouse and then her skirt. She smiled as she watched her daughter skip to the car ahead of them. With the blue, purple and white plaid skirt that went below her knees, white blouse and ponytail in her hair, she looked as if she could easily be from the 1950s, which was what Julia had begged for as she'd been bathing her.</p>
      <p>"She was telling me, while we waited for you," Castle said to Beckett after she had gotten Julia into her car seat. "How she decided to dress like that tonight. But where did she get the idea for the outfit?" he asked.</p>
      <p>"We were watching a movie from the 50s," Beckett said with a smile. "I forget the name now, we only caught the end. And the characters were wearing skirts like that. After she saw that she wanted to dress like that."</p>
      <p>"You did a good job," Castle said as he opened the passenger door for her. "How come you're not wearing an outfit like that?"</p>
      <p>"Anything wrong with what I have on now?" Beckett asked, and they both looked down at her deep blue sundress with very faint black dots on it.</p>
      <p>"No, actually, could be one of those polka dot dresses they had in the 50s for sock hops," Castle commented.</p>
      <p>"You mean like Cha-Cha wore in <em>Grease</em>?" Beckett said. She laughed slightly and shook her head when Castle nodded. "I think I prefer what I have," she said, touching his hand as she sat down.</p>
      <p>"I'll agree," Castle said. He smiled when Beckett said, "Good choice," and closed the door before he went around to the driver's side. He drove them almost out of town and to the diner where he saw there were people outside in the parking lot, a lot of older cars and people in 50s costumes walking around. "Looks like they're having a big party tonight," he commented as he opened the door for Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Can we look at the cars?" Julia asked eagerly as Castle helped her out of her car seat.</p>
      <p>"After dinner," Beckett said, taking her daughter's hand. They followed Castle inside the restaurant, and she looked around, as did Julia, at the different posters from the 50s on the walls. "You weren't kidding about nostalgic," she said to him before the hostess walked up to them.</p>
      <p>"Hello, welcome to <em>The Studebaker</em>, just three tonight?" the woman asked.</p>
      <p>"Can we sit at one of those booths looking out at the parking lot?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Oh sure, want to show your daughter the show outside?" the hostess said before she turned and led them to one of the booths that were along the parking lot.</p>
      <p>"I just hope she'll eat," Beckett said as she sat down next to Julia who was sitting in a booster seat.</p>
      <p>"She will, or else it'll take you longer to get to see the cars," Castle said as Julia stared out of the window.</p>
      <p>"But I can see them now," Julia said, looking at him in slight confusion.</p>
      <p>"She's got me there," Castle said to Beckett who merely glanced up at him from the menu.</p>
      <p>"Sweetie, the cars are going to stay for a while," Beckett finally said. "Why don't you see what you want to drink and eat first?"</p>
      <p>Reluctantly, Julia turned from the window and let her mother read to her from the menu before they placed their orders. She then turned her attention to the window and said, "Can we see the cars really Mommy? Up close?"</p>
      <p>"Yes, but once we're done," Beckett said, tickling her daughter on the side, making her giggle. "You did say that you were hungry before we came."</p>
      <p>"Lots," Julia said. "But I'm excited. And we get to see Derek tonight too! Right?"</p>
      <p>"We will," Castle said. "Now I'm interested in seeing if he and Veronica win tomorrow night."</p>
      <p>"Can we vote again?" Julia begged.</p>
      <p>"I'll vote too actually," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Thank you!" Julia cried.</p>
      <p>"Okay, we will watch the finals tonight," Beckett said. "But before that we'll see the cars after dinner."</p>
      <p>"I will eat, I promise Mommy," Julia said seriously.</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett replied, leaning over and kissing her forehead.</p>
      <p>"And don't forget tomorrow too," Castle said. When Beckett shot him a look he said, "What?"</p>
      <p>"Which car is your favorite that you can see?" Beckett asked Julia to distract her.</p>
      <p>"That one," Julia said. "The blue one with the white lines."</p>
      <p>"That is a Thunderbird," Beckett said with a smile. "From 1956."</p>
      <p>"Was that a long time ago?" Julia asked before their food was served.</p>
      <p>"Pretty long, I wasn't even born yet," Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"Neither was I," Castle said as Julia looked flabbergasted.</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled at that and gently urged her daughter to start eating, watching her during the meal to make sure that she did. Castle also helped, as Julia would turn her head to look outside every so often. The meal went a little slower doing that, but they finally finished, and while Castle was paying at the front of the restaurant, Beckett was helping Julia out of the booth.</p>
      <p>"How was your milkshake sweetie?" she asked as she picked her daughter up.</p>
      <p>"Good, I wanna walk Mommy," Julia said, stopping her.</p>
      <p>"Okay, then hold my hand tightly," Beckett said, squeezing her hand as she took it.</p>
      <p>"We're all set, are you ready to check out those cars finally?" Castle asked Julia when they had reached him. He took the little girl's other hand as they walked outside, and almost immediately Julia ran ahead of them to the first car. "She-" he started to say in surprise.</p>
      <p>"It's okay," Beckett said. "I'll keep a close watch on her. And so will you right?"</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle said as he went after her to where Julia was looking at the white wall tires.</p>
      <p>"Mommy look, there's white, like in the movie we saw!" Julia gasped. "And it's pointy here too! Just like the car in the movie," she said as she ran to the end of the car and pointed out the tailfins.</p>
      <p>"Your daughter can go inside if she likes," a woman said from the front of the car. "As long as she doesn't climb around the seats."</p>
      <p>"Think you can watch her now?" Beckett asked, looking at the engine.</p>
      <p>Of… course," Castle said before she was talking to the owner of the car. He turned to Julia who was standing in front of him and said, "Almost scared me, did you hear her?"</p>
      <p>"I can go inside?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, mind if I join you?" Castle asked. When Julia shook her head he helped her step inside and slid down the bench seat after her as she looked around in awe. "What do you think?" he asked, smiling as she looked at the radio.</p>
      <p>"It's big in here," Julia replied. "Is this where you listen to music?"</p>
      <p>"It is," Castle said. "I always loved old radios; the knobs were fun to play with."</p>
      <p>"But where do the players go?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"They didn't have those back then sweetie," Beckett said, leaning down through the open doorway. "But it didn't matter; you still got some great music on the radio, a lot of the music you like."</p>
      <p>"Cool," Julia said happily. "Come and sit inside Mommy, look at how big it is."</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled as her daughter slid down behind the wheel and Castle slid after her so she could sit. "You're right, it's pretty roomy," she said as she looked around. "The wheel too."</p>
      <p>"Ten and two kind of becomes two and a half and ten and a quarter," Castle said as Julia touched the wheel gently.</p>
      <p>"What's that mean?" the little girl asked interestedly.</p>
      <p>"Well, when you learn to drive-" Castle began.</p>
      <p>"Which won't be until you're sixteen," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Right, when you learn, they tell you to hold the wheel with your hands like this," Castle said, showing her.</p>
      <p>"Why like that?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"It helps when you turn and keeps the car straight," Beckett said. "Come on, we have a lot of other cars to see, and not a lot of time."</p>
      <p>"Is it almost time for the show?" Julia asked eagerly as they were walking to the next car.</p>
      <p>"We've still got a couple hours," Castle said, looking at his watch. "But that's enough time to look at the cars."</p>
      <p>"Here's the one you said was your favorite," Beckett said as they came up to a light blue Thunderbird.</p>
      <p>"Oooh, it's beautiful," Julia said eagerly, running up to it.</p>
      <p>"I know, it's in excellent condition too," Beckett said with a smile as she looked inside the window.</p>
      <p>"Spent five years getting that restored, so it's nice to hear you say that," a man said, walking up to them.</p>
      <p>"You managed to get some really good vinyl for the seats," Beckett said as she stood, Castle holding Julia to look inside.</p>
      <p>"I did, and the engine is my joy," the man said.</p>
      <p>"I saw, how does she run?" Beckett asked, going over to the front as the owner opened the hood.</p>
      <p>"Pretty well, I race her a little near the city, won a couple times against some douce coupes, so that's something I'm pretty proud of," the owner said as Beckett looked at the engine.</p>
      <p>"I wanna see the next car," Julia told Castle as they walked around the other side of the car.</p>
      <p>"Sure, let me just tell your mom…" Castle trailed off, looking at Beckett who was still talking with the owner about the engine. He caught her eye and gestured to the car next to the Thunderbird, and when she gave a slight nod, he turned and grabbed Julia's hand before they walked to the next car which was a two seat roadster.</p>
      <p>"It's a little car," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"I know, this is the kind they would race," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Before you were born?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Yep, but they still race them now," Castle said. He turned to see where Beckett was and said, "So I'm guessing the engines are pretty interesting," as she walked up to them.</p>
      <p>"They are," Beckett said as she looked at her daughter, seeing the little girl was looking at the engine of the roadster. "But I'm glad they had this little show."</p>
      <p>"She's taking after you," Castle commented as Julia looked at the tires.</p>
      <p>"She is," Beckett said a little absently.</p>
      <p>"Is that good or bad to you?" Castle asked, looking at her quickly.</p>
      <p>"Good, it's just I wasn't expecting it," Beckett said. "I don't know why, she's my daughter. But… I guess I was thinking she'd remember things that her mother liked and still be interested in that."</p>
      <p>"She is, to a certain degree," Castle said slowly. "Dancing?"</p>
      <p>"No, I think that she was interested in herself and her mother encouraged it," Beckett said quickly. "And so am I."</p>
      <p>"You sure you wouldn't want her to become a lawyer, or a detective?" Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I'm sure, and you don't need to really ask me that anymore," Beckett said with a slight smile. "I want her to have the chance to be a dancer, if she continues to want to."</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia said, turning back to see where she was. "Can we go look at more?"</p>
      <p>"We can," Beckett said, smiling as she reached out and took Julia's outstretched hand. "Castle?" she asked, looking back at him.</p>
      <p>"Oh right," Castle said, having been watching them again. He hurried to catch up and then took Julia's other hand that she held out to him. "Having fun?" he asked her.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, how long until the show Mommy?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"A while still," Beckett said simply after glancing at her watch. She laughed slightly as Julia let go of them to see the next car and she turned to Castle saying, "She's having fun up to a certain point."</p>
      <p>"Up until she stars thinking about the show," Castle said. "And you?"</p>
      <p>"Am I having fun?" Beckett asked. "I am, really, I've never taken her to a classic car show like this, I never knew she was so interested."</p>
      <p>"I was too, back when I was her age," Castle said. "And compared to today's cars… But you know, since she is your daughter, she's probably going to be pretty interested in classics like this."</p>
      <p>"Mostly likely, you know, we never went down to the track together; you and me," Beckett said with a smile.</p>
      <p>"No, but that's fine, we don't need to," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Are you sure? It would be pretty fun," Beckett said a little teasingly. She smiled when he shook his head no firmly, and she laughed saying, "You're admitting that I'd win with that I hope you know."</p>
      <p>"That's what I intended to do," Castle said. "When your daughter's old enough to drive a car like that, her I'll race. Although I get the feeling I'd lose to her too."</p>
      <p>"Maybe," Beckett said before she looked at the car to see where Julia was. She became a little worried when she didn't see her daughter, but she soon appeared on the other side.</p>
      <p>"We should keep up with her," Castle said in a low tone of voice as he followed her over to Julia.</p>
      <p>"Good idea," Beckett said with a small smile before she took Julia's hand. She laughed a little when her daughter yet again asked what time it was and as Castle answered for her, she placed her hand on Julia's back, wondering if there was going to be a time she wouldn't worry so much about her. She shook herself when they walked over to another car, and she focused on Julia, who asked questions about the Puget, the only one there. As they walked around the little European car she looked down at the little girl who was skipping next to her and knew that as long as she was her mother, she was never going to stop protecting Julia; not after everything they'd been through together.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"<em>This song is in E, this song is for you and</em>," Julia was singing, jumping on her knees on the couch in the family room peering over the back of it.</p>
      <p>"Great job sweetie," Beckett said, entering the family room with Castle. "Could hear you all the way in the kitchen."</p>
      <p>"You did?" Julia asked interestedly as she took the glass of milk her mother had carried in.</p>
      <p>"Definitely, you were right Kate, she's knows that song by heart doesn't she?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"A lot of songs," Beckett said, watching to make sure Julia didn't spill the milk as she drank. "Easy," she had to finally say, taking the glass. "You're going to choke."</p>
      <p>"I'm thirsty," Julia said before her mother wiped off the milk above her upper lip.</p>
      <p>"I know, but you have to be careful," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Did I have to get into my pajamas Mommy, I wanna wear my skirt more," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"I know, but I'm putting you straight to bed after this," Beckett said. "Well, once I can get you calmed down."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, speaking of that, what's your plan?" Castle asked, sipping from his mug of coffee.</p>
      <p>"I don't know, usually I have to improvise on the spot," Beckett said. "Sometimes she helps me and thinks of something herself."</p>
      <p>"Is it on now?" Julia asked eagerly as Castle checked his watch and turned on the TV.</p>
      <p>"Almost, come here," Beckett said after checking her watch as well. She picked Julia up and set her on her lap, sharing a kiss with her. "I have my phone ready," she said quickly when Julia opened her mouth to speak.</p>
      <p>"Mine too," Castle said quickly. "And see the laptop? As soon as the show starts I'll go onto the website and vote there for the three of us," he told her, indicating the computer on the coffee table.</p>
      <p>"Thank you!" Julia said eagerly. "Ooh, it's starting!" she squealed as the program opened. She turned so she was sitting crossed-legged on her mother's lap, watching eagerly as the stars came out, and the first dance began after the introductions and rehearsal footage.</p>
      <p>"Redemption Cha-Cha-Cha?" Castle asked after the dance was over.</p>
      <p>"It's when they can make up for a dance they did badly with," Beckett explained. "In this case, the Cha-Cha-Cha. And in Derek and Veronica's case, the Jive," she said after the host talked about the couple making up their dance.</p>
      <p>"They messed up?" Castle asked, pretending to be shocked as he looked at Julia.</p>
      <p>Giggling, Julia nodded and said, "Veronica slipped when she got up from the splits."</p>
      <p>"Ouch," Castle said. "Well, now they've got a chance to make up for it at least."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but I wanna see their Freestyle Mommy," Julia said to Beckett, leaning back against her and patting her jaw.</p>
      <p>"I know, and you will see it, but I think they need to dance the Redemption dances first," Beckett said, taking her small hand and kissing it gently. "But I know what you mean, I want to see what Derek does, he always has the best Freestyles."</p>
      <p>"I'll agree, even though I'm only remembering his and Jennifer's-" Castle started to say.</p>
      <p>"Jennifer and his," Julia corrected seriously. "Shh, they're gonna dance!" she said eagerly as the show came back from commercial. She watched excitedly as the couple danced a Jive after the rehearsal footage, and she squealed for an instant before covering her mouth with her hands until the dance was over.</p>
      <p>"The song?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes, a Buddy Holly song," Beckett replied with a smile. "She has a couple albums by him on her iPod."</p>
      <p>"That would explain it, and they did a pretty good job," Castle said, directing the last to Julia.</p>
      <p>"They did the best," Julia said happily. "Didn't they Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"We'll have to see what the judges say," Beckett said with a smile as she kissed the top of Julia's head.</p>
      <p>Julia held on tightly to Beckett's hands as the couple got their score, and she screamed eagerly as they got a 30. "Are they in first Mommy?" she asked, turning to her.</p>
      <p>"So far, they might tie after Rachel and Maks dance," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"It'd be hard to beat that," Castle said as the show went to commercial again. "I was going to ask you earlier Julia," he said, touching her arm to get her attention. "If you danced on the show, who would you dance with? Besides Derek," he finished quickly as she started to speak.</p>
      <p>"Oh… Maks, but he's a little scary," Julia said, looking thoughtful.</p>
      <p>"I agree, he's got a temper," Beckett said. "But he's pretty good."</p>
      <p>"Tristan too," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Is that it?" Castle said after he and Beckett looked at Julia when she fell quiet.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I wanna dance with Derek the most," Julia said firmly.</p>
      <p>"Doesn't surprise me," Castle said before they turned their attention to the show as it returned. He watched Julia when the next two dances were performed, finding it a little amusing to see how intently she fixed her eyes on the screen.</p>
      <p>"Oooh, Mommy, what are they gonna dance to with those costumes?" Julia asked eagerly as Veronica and Derek were shown wearing 30's mobster costumes.</p>
      <p>"That's a good question, I'd say they were going to dance the Quickstep dressed like that," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"It should be a good one, the song I mean," Castle said. "It might be a classic."</p>
      <p>"I would dance to <em>Goodnight Tonight</em>," Julia said, spreading her arms out.</p>
      <p>"Nice extensions sweetie," Beckett said, laughing softly. "But I don't think it's going to be that one."</p>
      <p>"It's back on!" Julia said as she looked at the TV screen. She was tense on her mother's lap as the rehearsal footage was shown, and finally the dance started. "Mommy!" she whispered.</p>
      <p>"What's wrong?" Castle asked, a little concerned.</p>
      <p>"It's a favorite song of hers," Beckett explained as on the screen Veronica and Derek were dancing to the song <em>Smooth Criminal</em>.</p>
      <p>"She doesn't understand the lyrics does she?" Castle said. When Beckett shook her head he breathed out slightly and said, "That's a relief."</p>
      <p>"Oh Mommy, I think they can get another 30!" Julia said, turning to Beckett once the dance was over.</p>
      <p>"I think you're right, let's wait and see though," Beckett said. "Len can be picky."</p>
      <p>Julia, with her hands at her mouth, watched eagerly as the judges talked to the couple and they then went to get their scores. With each 10 paddle that was raised, she gasped and with the last one she squealed and hugged her mother tightly. "They did perfect, for the whole night!" she said gleefully.</p>
      <p>"I know, they might win," Beckett said, laughing at her daughter's exuberance.</p>
      <p>"Going to be hard to calm her down I think," Castle said with a smile as he watched the little girl who jumped down from her mother's lap and was jumping up and down eagerly in front of them.</p>
      <p>After one more dance, the show had finished and Julia sighed as she leaned against her mother's knees. "I wish I could know now if they're gonna win," she said in slight frustration.</p>
      <p>"So do I, but tomorrow will probably go pretty fast until the show starts," Beckett said, smoothing her hair back. "Are you ready for bed?"</p>
      <p>"No I'm not asleep," Julia said, shaking her head side to side slowly. "Not ever."</p>
      <p>"Oh, I doubt the ever," Castle said under his breath, earning him a smile from Beckett. "So what do you want to do until you get tired?"</p>
      <p>"Can I watch more dances?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Sure, Jennifer and Derek again?" Castle asked as he opened YouTube on the TV.</p>
      <p>"Actually," Beckett said. "Search Shawn and Derek, and Quickstep."</p>
      <p>"That a good dance Mommy!" Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"And after how about we watch Maria and Derek's dances?" Beckett asked her as she hugged her daughter gently.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, please Castle, can we?" Julia asked him plaintively.</p>
      <p>"Not a problem," Castle said simply. "She's-" he started to say when Julia ran around the coffee table and sat on the edge.</p>
      <p>"It's okay, when you see this dance you'll understand why I asked for that one," Beckett said simply before the clip started.</p>
      <p>Watching the dance, Castle quickly got why Julia had moved, it was a very fast dance to go with the song, and the little girl was soon jumping up and down, almost in time with the dancers. "Not bad Julia," he said to her as the dance ended. "You've got pretty good rhythm." He then leaned over to Beckett and whispered to her, "Can see why you suggested that one if she wears herself out."</p>
      <p>"I know, that was the plan. Search Maria and Derek, and Cha-Cha-Cha next," Beckett said before she turned to her daughter. "Come here sweetie," she said as Julia ran back and forth humming to the Quickstep song under her breath. When the little girl was close enough, she picked her up and set her in between her and Castle. "Tell me when you're tired sweetie," she said as she smoothed down her hair before kissing the top of her head.</p>
      <p>"Not yet Mommy, I wanna see Maria dance now," Julia said though she yawned slightly.</p>
      <p>"Should let her dance again," Castle said as he found the dance.</p>
      <p>"Maybe the Salsa," Beckett said. "We'll see if we get to that though." She then smiled and said, "You might enjoy watching them dance."</p>
      <p>"Them or Maria?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Take a look and decide," Beckett said simply as the music started on the screen and he turned to watch. She looked at him; having already seen the dance a couple of times beforehand with Julia; and smiled when his eyes slightly widened at the first sight of Maria Menounos. "Well?" she asked after the dance had finished a minute later.</p>
      <p>"She's not too bad," Castle said slowly. When Beckett just looked at him he said in slight exasperation, "And she's attractive, yes I did notice that. What?"</p>
      <p>"Just wanted to see," Beckett said with a slight smirk before Julia tugged her dress a little. "What is it sweetie?"</p>
      <p>"What's that word mean? Attractive?" Julia asked pronouncing it slowly.</p>
      <p>"You want to take this Castle, you are a writer," Beckett said, looking at him.</p>
      <p>"It means someone is pretty," Castle said after shooting a mock glare at Beckett. "So that applies to your mom."</p>
      <p>"Oh good," Julia said before she wrapped her arms around her mother. "I thought you said just Maria is."</p>
      <p>"No, they both are," Castle assured her. "So what's next?" he asked quickly.</p>
      <p>"The Quickstep," Beckett said with a smile at their exchange.</p>
      <p>After watching the Quickstep, Rumba and Tango, Julia was slowly nodding off, but whenever Beckett tried to pick her up after each dance she would sleepily protest. "More Mommy, please?" she begged.</p>
      <p>"The Salsa," Beckett said to Castle who was watching her. "You sure you don't want to sleep, I think you're pretty close." When her daughter shook her head no she sighed slightly and said, "Okay, but as soon as you do I'm taking you upstairs."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia sighed. She settled back against her mother a little more and then sighed once more before the next dance started.</p>
      <p>Watching Julia instead of the dance; she'd seen it already as well; Beckett saw that she was soon asleep, and as soon as Julia's eyes were closed she stood up and headed up the stairs. As she was tucking the little girl under the bed sheet she stopped her from getting up when she woke up. "Easy sweetie, you fell asleep," she said gently, hearing footsteps outside the door.</p>
      <p>"But I wanna watch more," Julia said, slightly whining though she sounded very tired.</p>
      <p>"Tomorrow okay? Right now I want you to get some sleep so you won't be tired for tomorrow," Beckett said, smoothing her hair away from her forehead.</p>
      <p>"Are we going on the boat tomorrow?" Julia asked sleepily.</p>
      <p>"We are," Castle said from the doorway. "If you sleep tomorrow will get here faster so we can go sailing."</p>
      <p>"He's right," Beckett said, looking back at her daughter. "So goodnight Julia, I love you."</p>
      <p>"Love you Mommy," Julia said before she and Beckett shared a kiss before she kissed her forehead. As her mother stood up, she wrapped her arms around her Stitch doll, and turned onto her side, closing her eyes.</p>
      <p>Once she was sure that Julia was asleep, Beckett turned and went to the doorway where Castle was standing, watching the little girl for a moment. "Come on," she said, more to herself as she closed the lights and then the door. "Was an interesting day. I'm still in shock you managed to get those tickets."</p>
      <p>"I know, and I got them because I had a feeling you might not have tried since the day they started selling them was back in February, before we met Julia," Castle said. He noticed the look on her face and asked, "What?"</p>
      <p>"No, it's just… funny to think about the fact that I was not a mother back then, only six months ago," Beckett said as they went downstairs. "But thank you, again, for the tickets."</p>
      <p>"It's not a problem. I never really thought about seeing Paul, but now I'm listening to more of his music through your daughter, I'm looking forward to it," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"What did your mother and Alexis have to say?" Beckett asked as she followed him into the kitchen where he got a bottle of wine out.</p>
      <p>"They were excited for Julia first, because I guess I worded it wrong, they thought I had just gotten tickets for her and me and you," Castle said. "My mother sounded a little hurt that I hadn't thought of them."</p>
      <p>"Did she really think you didn't try to get tickets for all of us?" Beckett said with a smile as he handed her a glass of wine.</p>
      <p>"Alexis was quick to defend me, and I told them I had five tickets," Castle said as they went to the living room. "And after that my mother was very pleased and I told her about trying to get that record signed for Julia. I just wish I could somehow get her to meet Paul."</p>
      <p>"It's enough we'll be close enough to see him with our own eyes and not a pair of binoculars," Beckett said, putting her hand on his leg after they'd sat on the couch. "So I don't think Julia will complain. I'm not."</p>
      <p>"So you're excited to see him?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"For Julia too," Beckett said with a smile. "I think I'm going to need to make a calendar for her now," she said a little absently. "So she can countdown to the concert."</p>
      <p>"Good idea," Castle said. "I would want a calendar like that myself if I were her age." They were quiet for a moment, sipping their wine before he said, "Are you two going to be okay on the boat tomorrow? I don't know how much experience you have on water."</p>
      <p>"I thought that maybe we might do something out on the ocean before we left," Beckett said. "What that would be, I didn't know, but I thought it would be a good idea to be prepared and I bought some motion sickness medication for us, just in case."</p>
      <p>"Great, I was thinking, after I was able to arrange this day trip out into the ocean, what if you two were sick the whole time? Wouldn't be very fun," Castle said, putting his arm around Beckett's shoulders.</p>
      <p>"Right, not fun for you or us," Beckett said. When he replied with, "Either, or," she shook her head and said, "We better not get to the marina and find out we're going in rowboat, or else I'm sleeping with Julia in her room for the rest of the trip."</p>
      <p>"You're very cruel Detective Beckett," Castle said, leaning over and kissing her temple before she turned to him. They shared a slow, lingering kiss before he pulled away and said, "But I tend to like that part of you."</p>
      <p>"I remember," Beckett said with a smile before they both closed the gap between them at the same time and kissed yet again.</p>
      <p>"It's not a rowboat, so you're staying in my room the rest of the vacation," Castle said after they had pulled apart.</p>
      <p>"Fine," Beckett said as she pulled him down to her lips again, initiating another kiss, more passionate than the first two though it lingered for just as long. "Why don't you just tell me what kind it is?" she asked when they need to breathe.</p>
      <p>"Because," Castle said shortly. He saw that Beckett was about to protest that, but quickly kissed her again, leaning her back against the couch as he followed her, not breaking the contact of their lips pressed tightly together.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p> </p>
      <p></p>
      <div class="xcontrast">
        <p> </p>
        <p></p>
        <div>
          <p> </p>
          <p></p>
          <div>
            <p>"That's the ship?" Beckett said as Castle stopped in front of a gangplank over the side the docked boat.</p>
            <p>"Now you know why I didn't tell you," he replied as he turned to her and Julia. "I wanted it to be a surprise, especially for you Julia. What do you think?"</p>
            <p>"We saw this in the water at the restaurant, it sailed by," Julia said excitedly.</p>
            <p>"That's right-" Castle started to say before he was interrupted.</p>
            <p>"Richard, great of you to make it," a woman said behind him on the ship. "And that you found me with all the other sloops."</p>
            <p>"Not hard to find yours," Castle said. "Come on," he said to Beckett and Julia, letting them go ahead of him. "This is Rebecca Foster, she owns the ship," he told them before he turned to Rebecca and said, "And this is Kate Beckett and her daughter Julia."</p>
            <p>"It's nice to meet you," Beckett said as she shook the woman's hand.</p>
            <p>"Nice to meet you too, your daughter is adorable," Rebecca said with a smile. "I hope it's okay Richard, but my husband and daughter are going to be coming along with us. I thought Julia might like to meet Marianne."</p>
            <p>"How old is your daughter?" Beckett asked as they walked towards the stern of the ship after her.</p>
            <p>"Three, she just had her birthday last month," Rebecca said with a smile. "Mari, David, they're here," she said to a man and a little girl who were sitting on the benches outside the ship's wheelhouse.</p>
            <p>After Castle and Beckett had shaken hands with David, they looked down at Julia and Marianne who were peeking at each other from around their mothers.</p>
            <p>"Julia," Beckett said finally, as she realized her daughter wasn't going to move. "This is Marianne, and she won't hurt you I promise."</p>
            <p>"I know, but I don't know her Mommy," Julia said.</p>
            <p>"Why don't you go ahead and introduce yourself to her," Castle suggested. "Then you will know her. She might even want to play with you."</p>
            <p>Looking a little doubtful, Julia walked over to Marianne and said softly, "Hi."</p>
            <p>"Hi," Marianne said shyly, smiling a little at her.</p>
            <p>"Okay, well, hopefully they'll get along on the trip," Rebecca said. "David?"</p>
            <p>"Are you ready to go, I just need to get the ropes off and we're on our way," David said to Castle and Beckett.</p>
            <p>"We are," Beckett said with a smile as Julia went over to a life preserver hanging near them, Marianne following her.</p>
            <p>"I was worried," Rebecca said as Castle followed her husband to help him with the ropes. "Mari is incredibly shy, but I wanted her to meet your daughter so maybe she can get used to other kids."</p>
            <p>"She's not in preschool?" Beckett asked.</p>
            <p>"She is, but she's very anti-social at this point. I'm worried, but her pediatrician tells me that can happen sometimes and she should grow out of it," Rebecca said. "Mari, why don't you take Julia down below and show her the bunk beds." When the two little girls had started down the steps she said to Beckett as they walked over to follow them, "I don't know if you still have your daughter taking naps, but that's where Mari will be after lunch."</p>
            <p>"Mine will be joining her," Beckett said as they went down the stairs.</p>
            <p>"I thought so, why don't I give you a tour below, because I get the feeling we'll be mainly on deck during this trip," Rebecca said, grabbing the wall as the ship started to move.</p>
            <p>"Sure, also we should probably find your daughter and Julia," Beckett said, following her and holding onto the walls as she was a little unsteady with the movement of the boat.</p>
            <p>"Mommy, look, more shells!" Julia said as Rebecca and Beckett entered a room where there were bunks built into three of the walls.</p>
            <p>"This is basically the bedroom," Rebecca said as she lifted Marianne onto one bunk. "When we go on longer trips we use these beds."</p>
            <p>"You have another child?" Beckett asked, seeing the walls at each bunk had different framed shells hanging from them.</p>
            <p>"A son, Jacob," Rebecca said. "He's ten and at camp right now."</p>
            <p>"How fun," Beckett said, holding Julia so she could look at the shells better. "It's not cramped or anything sleeping down here?"</p>
            <p>"We sleep out too," Marianne said suddenly.</p>
            <p>"Yeah, she said Mommy, she said they have mocks to sleep outside," Julia said eagerly, tugging on Beckett's blouse.</p>
            <p>"Hammocks, my daughter's English is slowly getting there," Rebecca said, picking Marianne back up to set her down on the floor.</p>
            <p>"It was close, she's got half of it," Beckett said with a smile, watching as Julia and Marianne walked ahead to the next room, which turned out to be the kitchen. "This is a really nice boat," she said, looking around the small room.</p>
            <p>"It's our vacation home basically," Rebecca said. "Since we're here, would you like some wine?"<br/>"Sure," Beckett said as Marianne and Julia climbed up onto the booth around the table and looked out the window.</p>
            <p>"So how far north are you planning on going?" Castle was asking David who was steering the ship.</p>
            <p>"Not far, a couple hours sailing," David said. "Hey Mari, finished showing Julia around?"</p>
            <p>"Yeah," Marianne said as her father picked her up.</p>
            <p>"It's pretty incredible," Beckett said, coming in then with Julia. She was holding two glasses of wine, and she handed one to Castle.</p>
            <p>"I know, this isn't my first time on this one, it's why I asked about going sailing," he said as Beckett walked out to the deck as Marianne and Julia went to the prow. "Are they friends now?" he asked, nodding to the two little girls.</p>
            <p>"Not best friends, but they trust each other more," Beckett said. "I'm guessing that was your plan though, for them to meet."</p>
            <p>"Well, I figured it would be nice for her to make a friend outside of school," Castle said before he took a sip of his wine. "And outside of the city." He glanced at Beckett whose was looking at him in confusion and then shook his head saying, "I'm kidding, I actually thought it would be great to see if she could be friends with Marianne. I'm pretty good friends with Rebecca and David."</p>
            <p>"That explains how you were able to schedule this with them," Beckett said, smiling at Julia who was looking over the edge of the boat with Marianne, both girls squealing as the spray misted on them.</p>
            <p>"Actually it was a rescheduling," Castle said. "They had invited us over for a meal the first time you came up here, but… things didn't really work out for that."</p>
            <p>"No, but it was nice of them to do that," Beckett said. "And to let us come on their boat with them."</p>
            <p>"Apparently they're not going on their annual trip down the coast to the Keys, with their son at camp, so they thought some day trips with their daughter would be fun," Castle said. "And when I called them they invited us on today's trip."</p>
            <p>"Thank you for that, for calling them," Beckett said as she sat on a bench that was in the middle of the bow of the boat. "I remember a little vaguely sailing when I was young."</p>
            <p>"Vaguely?" Castle asked.</p>
            <p>"I was about Julia's age," Beckett said with a smile. "And I believe it was a lake, upstate. If I remember correctly I got pretty sick, so my parents decided that we really didn't need to go on a boat again for a while."</p>
            <p>"I remember the Staten Island Ferry, that was my first boat," Castle said. "And later on I went with my friends from boarding school on their boats."</p>
            <p>"Yeah, the next time I was on a boat myself after the first time was the ferry out to see the Statue of Liberty," Beckett said. "I think I prefer this kind a lot more."</p>
            <p>"Mommy," Julia said, hurrying back to her mother holding Marianne's hand. "My face is all wet."</p>
            <p>"Here," Rebecca said, handing Beckett a towel as she walked up to them. "I'm going to start lunch," she said to Castle and Beckett.</p>
            <p>"Any way we can help?" Castle asked, standing up as Beckett picked Julia up.</p>
            <p>"No, that's alright, to be honest we grabbed some food from <em>Beck's</em>," Rebecca said. "Seemed easier to do that really since they only serve one thing."</p>
            <p>"How'd you narrow down which pizza?" Castle asked.</p>
            <p>"Didn't, we have five of them," Rebecca said. "I'm just going to make some salad, so there's no need to help. Enjoy yourselves." She turned and started to walk away when she paused and turned back to them saying, "Could I ask you to watch my daughter?"</p>
            <p>"Of course, it won't be a problem," Beckett said, nodding to Julia and Marianne. "I want to keep an eye on my daughter and since they seem to be friends now, it's pretty easy."</p>
            <p>"Just watch Mari doesn't run around the deck," Rebecca said as her daughter ran over to her, hugging her around the legs. "We're still teaching her not to do that."</p>
            <p>"I'll have to tell Julia," Beckett said. "But she'll be fine, we'll watch her too." After Rebecca had gone below, she turned to Julia and called her over. "You heard what I said sweetie?" she asked seriously.</p>
            <p>"Yes Mommy, not to run," Julia replied in the same tone.</p>
            <p>"That means Mari too," Beckett said. "Go ahead and play okay?"</p>
            <p>"Kay," Julia said, kissing Beckett on the cheek after she hugged her tightly.</p>
            <p>"Go," Beckett said before Julia skipped over to where Marianne was looking over the side, pointing to the homes that were on the beaches they passed. She stood up and smiled as she walked to where Castle was standing a little further back from the girls. "I've never really been this way on the coast," she said after watching the homes thinning before giving way to trees.</p>
            <p>"Alexis and I went camping in this area," Castle said, pointing to a locale with what looked to be some burned forest. "Easy to remember because of the fire. But we camped inland, came out to the beach during the day. But she never liked the trees burned like that."</p>
            <p>"I don't blame her, depressing and a little scary when you're isolated out here," Beckett said, leaning against the railing. She felt a hand slip into hers and smiled as she looked down at Julia who squeezed in between her and Castle, Marianne following her. "What do you think?" she asked her daughter.</p>
            <p>"It's pretty," Julia said decisively. "Mari says she comes all the time."</p>
            <p>"I can see why," Beckett said.</p>
            <p>"Mommy, can I play hide and seek with Mari?" Julia asked after a while.</p>
            <p>"Go ahead, but play below deck okay? And don't go inside any rooms that are closed," Beckett replied. She shared a quick kiss with Julia before she watched the two girls hurry over to the stairs, hand in hand.</p>
            <p>"She should be okay in school," Castle commented. "Took to Mari pretty quickly."</p>
            <p>"I know, I just wonder how she'll be with the boys that are in her class," Beckett said with a sigh as he took her hand and they walked to the stern and sat on a bench that had a perfect view of where they'd come from. "I'm wondering if I should have put her in an all girls school," she commented as they both finished their wine, watching the wake of the boat soon fade and disappear in the waves.</p>
            <p>"I was a little surprised you didn't do that," Castle commented.</p>
            <p>"I talked with her doctor, she said that if I did that I was risking Julia being afraid of the male sex her entire life," Beckett said. "And I had the horrible thought that if she has a child in the future and it's a boy…"</p>
            <p>"But she would be married to a man… or maybe not," Castle said as Beckett looked at him and he realized what she had meant. "Yeah, that's a good point," he said quickly. "Well, does the school know about Julia's life up until we met her?"</p>
            <p>"I had to tell them, because her last name is still O'Malley officially, but luckily her teacher will call her Julia Beckett. I met her and she's really nice, she'll watch out in case any of the boys give her a hard time," Beckett said.</p>
            <p>"Glad I thought of that school," Castle said.</p>
            <p>"That's not where Alexis went?" Beckett asked.</p>
            <p>"No, I was tempted to send her there, but at that time it was a little too… secure, I didn't have to worry about her safety, so I sent her instead to Holyoake, which was just as good," Castle said. He was about to speak again when Julia skipped past them calling for her mother.</p>
            <p>"Where'd you get that hat sweetie?" Beckett asked to call her daughter's attention to the fact she was behind her.</p>
            <p>"Mommy!" Julia said happily, skipping as fast she could to them. She threw her arms around Beckett, nearly knocking off the sailor hat she was wearing. "Rebecca gave it to me," she said, pronouncing the name slowly.</p>
            <p>"That was nice of her. Did you have fun playing hide and seek?" Beckett asked, straightening her hat.</p>
            <p>"Yeah, Mari's really good," Julia said. "It's time for lunch, Rebecca said to come and get you. We're having pizzas!"</p>
            <p>"Okay, lead the way since you know where we need to go," Beckett said, standing up.</p>
            <p>"It's this way!" Julia said excitedly before she took off, skipping down the deck the way she'd come.</p>
            <p>"I'm suddenly hungry for Cracker Jacks and I don't know why," Castle said as he walked with Beckett. "Ow," he said as she nudged him in the side with her elbow. "You know you really need to watch that thing."</p>
            <p>"My elbow?" Beckett said. When Castle nodded she rolled her eyes and then went down below deck holding Julia's hand. "Is there enough room for all of us?" she asked, seeing the pizzas on the table.</p>
            <p>"No, we usually eat above," Rebecca said. "But if you want to eat down here you're welcome to."</p>
            <p>"Can we go up Mommy, please?" Julia asked.</p>
            <p>"Yes, let's get what you want to eat," Beckett said. After helping Julia with her food and then getting her own, she followed her daughter up, and to the stern again where she sat with Castle on the bench they'd been on before. "Are you having fun?" she asked the little girl who was eating standing up, her plate next to Beckett.</p>
            <p>"Yes, I like the boat Mommy," Julia said. "And Mari too, she's nice."</p>
            <p>"She thinks you are too Julia," Rebecca said, walking up to them then. "You don't mind if we join you do you?" she directed to Castle and Beckett.</p>
            <p>"It's your boat," Castle said.</p>
            <p>"So how long are you here in the Hamptons?" Rebecca asked once she was sitting down.</p>
            <p>"Until Sunday morning," Beckett said. "Which is a shame, but Julia's starting kindergarten next Monday."</p>
            <p>"Are you excited for school Julia," Rebecca asked as her daughter and Julia were eating next to each other, standing up.</p>
            <p>"No, I wanna stay with my mommy," Julia said truthfully.</p>
            <p>"I know, but you need to go sweetie," Beckett said firmly. "You'll have fun there."</p>
            <p>Julia shook her head and leaned against her mother, burying her face in her lap.</p>
            <p>Rebecca quickly changed the subject, asking Julia what she'd done in town since arriving, the little girl talking eagerly until David came from the wheelhouse and said, "Just got word there are some dolphins ahead of us."</p>
            <p>"Really?" Beckett asked.</p>
            <p>"Where Daddy?" Mari almost screamed.</p>
            <p>"We should be getting to them soon," David said. "I'll call back over the speaker to you."</p>
            <p>"Are there really dolphins?" Julia asked.</p>
            <p>"There are, we see them around this time," Rebecca said. "But Mari, after that you need to take a nap." When the little girl shook her head she sighed and said, "So is Julia."</p>
            <p>"Am I?" Julia asked in bewilderment.</p>
            <p>"Yes," Beckett said, shooting a mock glare at Castle as he smothered his laughter into a cough.</p>
            <p>The two girls tried to convince their mothers that they didn't need a nap, but were interrupted in their efforts when David called back to them that the dolphins were off the starboard side. Beckett had to run after Julia as her daughter ran to the side of the ship, afraid she was going to slip. But luckily the little girl was fine and she stood with her at the railing, watching as a pod of dolphins leapt out of the water to Julia and Marianne's delight.</p>
            <p>"That never gets boring," Rebecca commented when the ship managed to pull out ahead of the dolphins.</p>
            <p>"I can imagine it wouldn't," Castle said. "They're pretty amazing."</p>
            <p>"Okay, I hope you'll excuse me, I'm going to take my daughter below for her nap," Rebecca then said after Marianne yawned loudly.</p>
            <p>"And looks like I need to take Julia," Beckett said as Julia buried her face against her.</p>
            <p>"I'll be with David in the wheelhouse, after I take these plates," Castle told the two women as they picked up their daughters.</p>
            <p>Down in the bedroom, Rebecca put her daughter in her bunk while Beckett put Julia in the bunk that her son used.</p>
            <p>"Are you sure it's okay she uses your son's bed?" Beckett asked after they had managed to get their respective daughters settled and asleep before they left.</p>
            <p>"It's fine," Rebecca said. When they were back on deck she walked to the stern and sat down, her glass of wine still next to the bench. "I was hoping to get to talk to you," she said as Beckett sat on the bench across from her. "I don't know if Richard's told you, David and I are fans of his, we have all of his books. Actually a copy each."</p>
            <p>"In case you read the same book at the same time?" Beckett asked with a slight smile.</p>
            <p>"That and to flesh out our library," Rebecca said. "It's a huge room and there are a lot of empty shelves which bothers the crap out of us both. But we know that you're his inspiration for Nikki Heat."</p>
            <p>"Yes," Beckett said slowly.</p>
            <p>"Inspiration, I gathered from meeting you and talking to you for a little at the start of this trip, you and Nikki are alike to a point and then diverge," Rebecca said. "Your daughter being the most obvious deviation."</p>
            <p>"She's ad-" Beckett began.</p>
            <p>"No, I know, we heard about that in the paper," Rebecca said quickly. "We get the <em>Times</em>. But we were pretty horrified to learn about that. She wasn't… harmed was she?"</p>
            <p>Beckett shook her head and said, "Neither was I if you're going to ask. We were incredibly lucky."</p>
            <p>"I thought it was sweet that you wanted to adopt her actually," Rebecca said. "It's not easy for a woman to balance her career and kids, believe me I know."</p>
            <p>"I couldn't just let her be thrown into foster care," Beckett said. "But what is your career?" she then asked, not wanting to explain Julia believing she was her mother.</p>
            <p>"I'm a property lawyer," Rebecca said. "Here in the Hamptons, as is David actually, we work together which is pretty nice. Except those times we're clashing over a private matter, but it doesn't happen too often luckily. You and Castle don't have any problems with that?" When Beckett's head snapped up she said, "I was able to tell."</p>
            <p>"Usually we can hide that better," Beckett said, her tone of voice slightly weak. "Um, actually no, so far we haven't had any problems hiding our relationship at work."</p>
            <p>"How long have you been together?" Rebecca asked.</p>
            <p>"Over a year," Beckett said. "It hasn't been easy," she said, feeling she could trust the woman. "But we've managed."</p>
            <p>"It's great that he doesn't mind your adopting Julia, but seeing as he had a daughter before you two started to date, it doesn't surprise me," Rebecca said. She then looked up and to Beckett's right saying, "My daughter is awake?"</p>
            <p>"Yeah, David said the bell is ringing?" Castle said. "He didn't explain."</p>
            <p>"There's a button that rings an alarm in the wheelhouse," Rebecca said, getting up.</p>
            <p>"They didn't really sleep that long," Beckett said, hurrying after her.</p>
            <p>"I get the feeling your daughter is still asleep, mine does not like to take naps," Rebecca said as they went below. "With a vengeance."</p>
            <p>Beckett smiled at that before they went into the bedroom, seeing that Marianne was awake, but also Julia. "Morning sweetie," she said, going to her daughter.</p>
            <p>"Morning Mommy, is it time for the show?" Julia asked, yawning.</p>
            <p>"Not yet," Beckett said, taking her down from the bunk. "But we're starting to turn around, so let's see if maybe we can see those dolphins again."</p>
            <p>"Kay," Julia said, sliding off the bed into Beckett's arms. "Did I miss them when I was asleep?"</p>
            <p>"You didn't," Castle said, standing in front of them at the bottom of the stairs. "They went out into the ocean more. But I think David's going to stop the ship soon, so we can go up on the beach." He looked up at Beckett and said, "There'll be a rowboat for that, but I swear I didn't know."</p>
            <p>"Don't worry," Beckett said with a smile. "I think that'll be fun."</p>
            <p>"Yeah, can we get some shells Mommy?" Julia asked eagerly as she climbed the stairs with Beckett and Castle.</p>
            <p>"Of course," Beckett said.</p>
            <p>"Mind if I help?" Castle asked Julia.</p>
            <p>"No, we can find lots more with you helping us," Julia said happily.</p>
            <p>Beckett smiled at how eager her daughter sounded, and she reached over to Castle, squeezing his arm before they went to the wheelhouse to join the others; his hand taking hers in response.</p>
            <hr/>
            <p>"Are you sure you're not tired?" Castle asked Julia as he watched her coloring in front of him. When the little girl shook his head he sighed and then said, "You could take a quick nap-"</p>
            <p>"I would stop Castle," Beckett said, coming into the room with a mug in hand. "She's not going to sleep until the show is over."</p>
            <p>"Thank you Mommy," Julia said happily, licking some of the whipped cream that was on the hot chocolate. "Is it time?"</p>
            <p>"Another five minutes," Beckett said, glancing at her watch. "Come here though," she said, patting the couch next to her as she sat next to Castle. "How did you like the boat ride today?" she asked once her daughter had gotten on the couch, but instead of sitting on the other side of her, got on her lap instead, stretching her legs onto Castle's lap.</p>
            <p>"Was fun," Julia giggled as he tickled her bare feet. "Stop," she said, laughter still in her voice.</p>
            <p>"Just wanted to make sure you're still up," Castle said. "The show's starting."</p>
            <p>Julia squealed in joy as she saw that he was right, and she watched the TV eagerly, clapping every time Veronica and Derek were shown on the screen.</p>
            <p>Beckett watched to make sure Julia didn't fall asleep as the last three couples danced one of their past dances. She especially made sure her daughter was awake when Veronica and Derek danced their Samba. But she didn't really have to do much, since Julia was jumping up and down on her lap.</p>
            <p>"Here, why don't you stretch your legs," Castle said, taking Julia off Beckett's lap once the dance was over. He was surprised when she didn't tense up in his hands and he had to tighten his grip since she kicked her legs, crying out in joy. "I take it they did well?" he asked Beckett.</p>
            <p>"Yeah, a perfect score usually indicates that," she replied with a smile. "But Julia loves the Samba, so that's why this reaction."</p>
            <p>"Should I take her outside in case she wants to run around?" Castle asked, watching as Julia jumped up and down next to the table, humming the song that had played during the Samba and holding her Stitch doll as if it were her partner.</p>
            <p>"No, she'll be fine," Beckett said, watching her daughter. "Julia, sweetie, come here," she said, holding out her hand.</p>
            <p>Julia squealed and ran over to her mother, taking her hand before Beckett spun her once. "Thank you Mommy!" she said happily.</p>
            <p>"You're welcome," Beckett said. "Come on, there's only three more dances and then we find out who wins." She picked Julia up and then helped her finish the rest of her hot chocolate. "Sleepy?" she asked, cuddling her daughter against her.</p>
            <p>"Are you Mommy? You and Castle ask all the time," Julia queried.</p>
            <p>"No, we just want to make sure you stay awake a little longer," Beckett said, kissing her forehead.</p>
            <p>"See, I told you," Castle said to Julia with a smile as he watched them.</p>
            <p>"It's back!" Julia cried as the show returned. She held her Stitch doll to her as tightly as she could, watching the three couples dance for the last time that night. When Veronica and Derek were last she looked up at her mother and said, "Think they will win?"</p>
            <p>"I think so," Beckett said. "That Jive was pretty good, don't you think?" She smiled when Julia nodded frantically and said, "We'll just have to wait and see."</p>
            <p>"I think they'll win," Castle said, getting Julia's attention. He shared a smile with Beckett as the little girl's green eyes grew wide and said, "We did vote as much as we could last night. And Derek's got a lot of girls who want to see him win, whoever his partner is. Your mother for instance."</p>
            <p>"Castle, I'm not that kind of fan," Beckett said in slight annoyance, giving him a look. "He's a good dancer and I admire his choreography, I'm not a shrieking fan girl."</p>
            <p>"But if you were younger you would be r-" Castle started to say when he was suddenly hit in the face with something. "Ow, seriously?" he said as he took the decorative pillow she'd thrown at him off his lap.</p>
            <p>"It stopped you from committing to the question didn't it?" Beckett asked.</p>
            <p>Castle started to speak when he looked down at Julia who was looking at him. "I think we're either scaring or entertaining your daughter," he said.</p>
            <p>"Sweetie?" Beckett said, bending her head to check on Julia.</p>
            <p>"It was funny Mommy, did you hurt him?" Julia asked.</p>
            <p>"I love how she asks if I'm okay after saying it was funny," Castle said in an aside to Beckett. "I'm fine Julia, if your mom was really mad with me, she wouldn't hit me with a pillow."</p>
            <p>"What did she do?" Julia replied.</p>
            <p>"Would she," Castle corrected. "And I don't want to know what she would do. I honestly don't plan on finding out."</p>
            <p>"Good idea," Beckett said. "And why are you talking like I'm not in the room?"</p>
            <p>"Because it's cute?" Castle said, making a hopeful face. He spluttered when another pillow hit him in the face and laughed as Julia suddenly burst into a fit of giggling. "She thought so."</p>
            <p>"She doesn't know you as well as I do," Beckett said, rolling her eyes though there was a wide smile on her face.</p>
            <p>"How long until they say who wins Mommy?" Julia asked with a sigh as Castle kissed her mother's cheek.</p>
            <p>Glancing at Castle, Beckett looked at the TV and said, "Pretty soon, ten minutes until the show's over." She smiled when her daughter squirmed on her lap and she said, "I guess you want to find out sweetie?"</p>
            <p>"Yeah, do you know Mommy?" Julia said.</p>
            <p>"I wish I did," Beckett said. "But we'll see soon, I promise."</p>
            <p>Julia squirmed around impatiently as there was a musical performance on the show, not even the dancing that accompanied it could get her attention. She curled her legs up under her and pressed against her mother more before the last segment started.</p>
            <p>"Here sweetie, sit here," Beckett said, seating her in between them as Julia gasped when the show returned from commercial. She glanced at Castle, who gave her a questioning look, and she shook her head quickly before the host began to speak.</p>
            <p>Castle looked down at Julia who was looking at the TV screen intently, her body tense as her legs swung back and forth. He glanced at Beckett, who shook her head, and he guessed that was supposed to be his answer to his unasked question, if the little girl was alright.</p>
            <p>Julia was holding her Stitch doll up to her mouth, as there was a moment of music with a very steady, pounding drumbeat. But finally the host announced the winners, and she would have fallen off the couch into the coffee; if Castle and Beckett hadn't grabbed her at the same time; as she screamed in exhilaration as Veronica and Derek were named the winners. "Mommy, they won, they won!" she shrieked as she threw herself at her mother.</p>
            <p>"I know, I'm glad too sweetie," Beckett said, looking at Castle with wide eyes.</p>
            <p>"She's very exuberant," Castle commented. "Are you okay Julia?" he asked. He was a little startled when she whirled around and hugged him, bouncing up and down on her knees. "Okay, I'm glad they won too," he said, smiling at Beckett who reached out to him and squeezed his arm.</p>
            <p>Julia climbed down from the couch then, both her mother and Castle helping her down, and she ran to stand in front of the TV, peering at it excitedly as Veronica and Derek were given their trophy. She squealed happily, running around the room before she was suddenly stopped.</p>
            <p>"Okay, the show's over for this season," Beckett said, picking her up. "And you need to go to bed because it's almost Wednesday."</p>
            <p>"No, I can't sleep Mommy, I'm too happy!" Julia giggled, wriggling in her mother's arms until she had to set her down before she dropped her.</p>
            <p>"But-" Becket started to say when Castle turned off the TV and spoke.</p>
            <p>"Why don't we go down to the pool, swim for a little until she gets tired?" he suggested, standing up.</p>
            <p>"Yeah, let's go in water Mommy, please?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
            <p>Beckett thought for a moment before she finally nodded and said, "Okay, but not for that long, you really need to sleep." She picked Julia up and carried her over to the stairs, mouthing a thank you to Castle before she started up to the second floor.</p>
            <hr/>
            <p>Jumping up and down on the top step of the pool, Julia squealed in pleasure as her mother pulled her out, swinging her legs out in the air before setting her down. "I wanna swim more Mommy," she said as Beckett wrapped her towel around her and started to rub her dry.</p>
            <p>"We can swim again tomorrow if you're not too tired," Beckett said, picking Julia; still in the towel; up. "For now let's just sit in front of the fire a little okay?"</p>
            <p>"Kay," Julia said with a sigh. When her mother was sitting on the chair across from the one Castle was on, she pushed the towel off her shoulders to wrap her arms around Beckett. "I wanna dance like that Mommy," she said. "And win like Derek did."</p>
            <p>"That would be nice," Beckett said, kissing the top of her head. "We'll see when you get older though."</p>
            <p>"You're a pretty good dancer so far," Castle commented. "I think you might be pretty good at ballet too."</p>
            <p>"Thank you," Julia said with a shy smile. "Thank you for voting for Derek."</p>
            <p>"You're very welcome, I was happy to do it though," Castle replied. "He and Veronica were the best out of the three."</p>
            <p>"He was, Derek's best," Julia sighed before she yawned widely.</p>
            <p>"Okay, I think that means it's time for a quick shower before I put you to bed," Beckett said, having been waiting for that. She put the towel on the chair before she carried her daughter to the outdoor shower and had her stand under the warm water to rinse off. She dried the little girl off again, and then carried her into the house, Castle following them.</p>
            <p>"Mommy," Julia said, her arms wrapped around her mother as she carried her to her bed. "Can we go see Paul tomorrow?"</p>
            <p>"Not yet," Beckett said, rubbing her hair dry as much as she possibly could. "When it says we can on those tickets that Castle got us."</p>
            <p>"Is it far?" Julia asked, yawning widely.</p>
            <p>"October," Castle said, standing just inside the door. "But it'll go fast I'm sure."</p>
            <p>"Definitely time for you to sleep now," Beckett said. "And sleep as long as you can okay? You got to stay up a lot longer than I normally let you."</p>
            <p>"Thank you for letting me see Veronica and Derek win," Julia said, taking her Stitch doll as Becket covered her with the sheet. "What will we watch tomorrow?"</p>
            <p>"We'll wait and see," Beckett said. She leaned down and kissed her daughter's forehead before sharing a quick kiss with her. "Sleep tight Julia, I love you."</p>
            <p>"Love you Mommy," Julia said. "Night Castle," she said, waving at him before she turned over on her side.</p>
            <p>"Good night Julia," Castle said as Beckett walked over to him. He headed out into the hallway and then looking over her shoulder as she stood in the doorway watching Julia fall asleep quickly.</p>
            <p>"I'm glad we won't be doing that for another year," Beckett said with a sigh after she had shut the door behind them. "Way too late for her to stay up."</p>
            <p>"She did enjoy it though," Castle said as they headed down the stairs. "Oh geez, just had a thought, what if they'd lost?"</p>
            <p>"I know, I was preparing myself for that earlier," Beckett said with a smile as she opened the door to the back and went down the steps. "I was hoping I wouldn't… are you coming?" she asked as she stopped to see he hadn't followed her.</p>
            <p>"Oh, you want to swim again?" Castle asked.</p>
            <p>"For a little," Beckett said with a smile as he hurried down the steps. "But what I was going to say, I really hoped I wouldn't have to try and comfort her. She would have been devastated if they hadn't won."</p>
            <p>"That's happened before hasn't it?" Castle asked as he opened the gate to the pool for her.</p>
            <p>"You mean people who should have won losing?" Beckett asked. When he nodded she smiled and said, "A number of times. Remember Maria Menounos? She didn't even make it to the finals."</p>
            <p>"Shame, she looked like she was doing pretty well," Castle said, watching her take off her robe. He watched her step inside the water and then coughed slightly before he tore his gaze away and removed his robe.</p>
            <p>"That was a good idea," Beckett said as she watched him get in.</p>
            <p>"What?" Castle asked, swimming up to where she was standing in the middle of the pool.</p>
            <p>"Bringing Julia here after the show," Beckett said with a smile. "Enough to wear her out and also calm her down."</p>
            <p>"Yeah, I'm surprised she can get like that. Always thought she was very quiet," Castle commented.</p>
            <p>"She is, but this show makes her more like a hyper four year old," Beckett said, swimming to the other end of the pool before hanging onto the edge as she watched Castle dive under and then resurface next to her.</p>
            <p>"Do you prefer her more quiet?" Castle asked as he tread the water.</p>
            <p>"It's nice, easier to take care of her I will admit that," Beckett said slowly. "But I know kids that age are usually more how she was after the show. I think she's just going to be like that the rest of her childhood."</p>
            <p>"Quiet and then hyper?" Castle asked. When Beckett nodded he said, "Alexis was like that. When she got more into her teenage years she became more the way she is now, kind of a balance between the two."</p>
            <p>"That's how most women are," Beckett said with a smile. "But I think Julia might be a lot quieter than your daughter is."</p>
            <p>"You're right," Castle said. "And more than you; I can't really see her wanting a Harley."</p>
            <p>"No, I can't either," Beckett said with a smile. "Castle, I wouldn't do that," she told him, slipping back into the water as he was trying to untie the back of her bikini top.</p>
            <p>"Why not, we are alone," Castle said, following her back to the shallow end.</p>
            <p>"Julia could easily wake up and try looking for me," Beckett pointed out. "And she'll figure out we came here and come down."</p>
            <p>"You make a good point," Castle said, trying not to sound too frustrated.</p>
            <p>"But," Beckett said, turning to him as she stood. "I think I've had enough of swimming for the day." She leaned against him and kissed him lightly on the lips before she pulled away and turned to the steps.</p>
            <p>Castle hurried after her, trying not to run as she went to the shower, but he couldn't stop himself from pushing her back against the tiled wall before he kissed her hard. He was relieved when she quickly responded to him, and he tried to keep his hands from her bikini, knowing they still were risking her daughter seeing them. So he consoled himself with holding her by the small of her back, tightly against his body.</p>
            <p>When they parted, Beckett brushed her lips against Castle's a few times before she reached next to her and turned off the water. She grabbed his hand and without a word pulled him to where their robes were, throwing hers on before she hurried up to the house, hand in hand with him. "I need to check on Julia," she said apologetically as they walked back inside.</p>
            <p>"Go ahead," Castle said. He followed her up the stairs and stood behind her as she carefully opened the door to Julia's room.</p>
            <p>Reassured her daughter was alright; fast asleep with her Stitch doll clutched tightly to her; Beckett closed the door and followed Castle down the hall, their hands clasped firmly between them. "I remembered again; when Julia asked me about seeing Paul," she said once they were in the room with the door locked behind them. "That I really owe you something Castle."</p>
            <p>"You don't," he replied quickly as he started to light the fire. "I get to take my mother and Alexis too, so it'll be fun for me; like I said yesterday."</p>
            <p>"Then maybe-" Beckett began to say as she ran her hands inside his robe, down his chest.</p>
            <p>"No!" Castle said, cutting her off abruptly, grabbing her wrists. "No, not that Kate, you don't owe me anything like that."</p>
            <p>Beckett was surprised at that, and she watched as Castle sat at the end of the bed, running his hand over his face. "What is it?" she asked, walking over to him kneeling in front of him slightly.</p>
            <p>"I didn't want to tell you about this," Castle replied with a sigh as he looked up to see her staring at him. "But after I was told that you were going to be sent to Thailand with Julia, and Harris would…" he said before Beckett stood up and walked over to the fire. He hurriedly went to her saying, "I don't need to continue."</p>
            <p>"No, you do," Beckett said, taking a fortifying breath. "You've kept this quiet for three months Castle, I've shared what happened that whole time in Queens," she said. "I need to hear this from you."</p>
            <p>"You're not alone in carrying something residual from your abduction," Castle said. "Though I wasn't taken with you."</p>
            <p>"It doesn't matter," Beckett carefully reminded him. "We're romantically involved so it's going to affect you. Tell me Rick."</p>
            <p>At his name, Castle looked at her and said while he took her hand, "After I was told that, that night when I finally went to sleep at god knows what time in the morning, I had a horrible dream, sickening." He sighed in aggravation and then continued his tone soon becoming frustrated, "You were being hurt, badly, and I was there, I was right there but I couldn't stop it. You were in pain, and men were… It was terrifying because we were so close to that deadline Julia's mother had coded. I could see it happening to you and I was angry and a little disturbed when that agent, Garcia, tried to keep me from going with him, Ryan and Esposito to Queens. But I couldn't tell you about that dream Kate, not after it almost becoming real because of that son of a bitch Harris. I didn't want you to keep remembering everything that happened."</p>
            <p>"Thank you for thinking of me, but you've been remembering this dream since then," Beckett said. "Have you told anyone about it?"</p>
            <p>"Not until now," Castle said.</p>
            <p>"Okay, well it was just a dream, I'm here, and not in Thailand. And neither is Julia," Beckett said. "And Harris did not rape me and those men in your dream were not real."</p>
            <p>"I know, I'm reminded of that every time I see you," Castle said, pulling Beckett against him in an embrace.</p>
            <p>"Let me remind you now…" Beckett said in a near whisper, pushing on the back of his neck. She kissed him then, and opened her robe as best she could in between them before taking his hand and sliding it past the open fabric.</p>
            <p>Feeling the smooth heat of her skin, Castle pulled her tighter against him, his hand on the small of her back. He kissed her deeply before he pushed her robe off both her shoulders and made quick work of the top of her bikini as she shrugged the dark blue material off her arms.</p>
            <p>Quickly pulling off Castle's robe; though it made him stop undressing her; Beckett then stepped back, and took his hand, leading him to the bed. She helped him with the rest of her swimsuit, and then lay back as he joined her, both of them working together until he was naked as well. She took his kiss eagerly as he moved his hand to her legs and she quickly wrapped her left high above his waist while he entered her slowly.</p>
            <p>Sliding his mouth down to Beckett's jaw, Castle pressed a few frantic kisses there before going further to her neck. After some more quick kisses, he slowly pulled away from her enough to look at her as they moved together very slowly. He reached down to her leg that was wrapped around him, and ran his hand along her skin, the noise almost deafening in the mostly silent room. He then lowered his head, and kissed her again deeply, feeling her fingers through his hair. He groaned a little heavily as her nails raked across his scalp, and he thrust against her a little harder than he had wanted to, moving away from her quickly.</p>
            <p>Beckett arched her back roughly as he started to kiss along her shoulders, lips brushing just barely against her skin, before he went down further to her breasts. She trembled imperceptibly as he ghosted his lips just over her skin, and she pushed on his shoulders before he titled his head up towards her. She kissed him hard, moaning in joy into his mouth as he responded immediately, and she felt him increasing his pace slightly. She hurried to do the same, and the sound of their hips meeting was incredibly gratifying; as was the pleasure that shot through her at the same time.</p>
            <p>While they were kissing, parting for a quick gasp of air and then crushing each other's lips again, Castle brought his right hand in between them, letting it slide down her abdomen. He felt her tense in response, moaning against his mouth at the same time as he went as slowly as he could. He pulled back from her slightly and swallowed roughly as he watched his hand soon disappear into the shadow their bodies made. He started kissing her neck hungrily, his fingers easily finding the junction of her legs.</p>
            <p>Breathing roughly as he started to carefully rub his fingertips against her, Beckett held onto him tightly, her nails lightly digging into his skin. Castle didn't stop though, and she slid her right hand up to the back of his head, pushing on it enough so he moved. Their lips met, and nearly at the same time he moved his hand. She was incredibly disappointed; as she was getting a lot out of his ministrations; before he tilted her hips slightly. She moved to hold that position and broke off their kiss as he sank inside her deeper then. She let out a slight gasp as she embraced him to her tightly, his body pressing against the same place he'd just been stimulating with his fingers.</p>
            <p>Trailing his lips down over Beckett's neck, Castle went to the hollow of her throat, kissing at it before he nipped the edge with his teeth. He was a little startled when they both suddenly started to move faster, never saying a word to each other. But he wasn't complaining, enjoying the sensation as he moved to press his forehead against hers, their breath mingling together between them as they panted heavily. "Kate…" he groaned as her other leg wrapped around his legs, her hands pressing down forcefully on his shoulders, bringing them closer than they already were.</p>
            <p>Raising her head, Beckett responded instantly when Castle caught her lips with his own. That kiss though was a lot less intense, but no less enjoyable as they explored each other's mouths before parting. Lips brushing together as they kept moving in perfect sync, she tilted his head so she could brush hers against his jaw and then neck, feeling his groan deep in his throat. She finally was unable to stop herself, and she threw her arms around him as tightly as she could, back arching and body going tense in response to the sudden pleasure that came on her in waves.</p>
            <p>Hearing Beckett crying out in ecstasy had Castle suddenly driving inside of her before he joined her quickly in that split second moment when they were both completely unaware of anything else except their satisfaction. He was breathing roughly when they stopped moving, and he withdrew from her carefully before he slid her around onto her stomach.</p>
            <p>"Are you ever going to tell me why you keep doing that?" Beckett asked, propped up on her arms, her cheek resting on her right hand as she looked back at him.</p>
            <p>"Do you not like it?" Castle asked before he pressed a kiss to her left shoulder.</p>
            <p>"I never said that," Beckett said quickly, in case he was going to stop. "But I really don't get why you have this obsession with my back."</p>
            <p>"Well, it's really all over," Castle told her. "Believe me; I enjoy the front of your body as much as here. But remember when that bomb went off in your apartment?"</p>
            <p>"Really, it started there even though my skin was smudged with soot and I was injured?" Beckett said, glaring mockingly at him. When he merely smirked slightly she rolled her eyes, but it lost any kind of severity when his fingers traced her spine down to the small of her back.</p>
            <p>"Do you want me to stop, seriously?" Castle asked, looking into her eyes to see her response.</p>
            <p>"No, I enjoy it," Beckett said, feeling her skin rippling against the brush of his fingers before he laid his hand flat. "So don't stop, I just wanted to know why. Now I wonder if I should have asked though."</p>
            <p>"Does it bother you I've been fantasizing about you that long," Castle asked, leaning over her then as he moved so he was on his stomach as well.</p>
            <p>"If you had asked me that before that case, I would have expected it. I wouldn't have liked the thought exactly, would have been disturbing," Beckett teased him though she was partially serious.</p>
            <p>"I thought it would be a compliment," Castle commented. He wasn't surprised when she rolled her eyes at that, and he bent his head, kissing her shoulder saying, "But come on, you told me you fantasized about me."</p>
            <p>"Oh, I was just humoring you," Beckett said as seriously as she could. When Castle looked up at her, a smile broke out on her face, and she laughed as he pinched her side lightly. "Ow, it was great seeing that look on your face."</p>
            <p>Castle didn't reply to that, instead he looked down at her back, running his hand down her skin again as she watched him. He kissed his way down her spine until he had reached the middle, and there he pressed his cheek against her. "What the hell were we talking about?" he asked after they were quiet for a long time, their breathing becoming heavier.</p>
            <p>"I don't remember," Beckett breathed out, feeling her skin growing damp as he'd spoken against it. She turned over then as he moved off of her and she sat up with him, throwing her arms around him tightly as he pulled her into his embrace. She kissed him hard, and felt his hands holding her firmly as he responded, his head tilting to the side slightly before he slipped his tongue into her mouth.</p>
            <p>Pressing down on the small of Beckett's back, Castle broke away from her lips long enough to help her straddle his lap. Once they were coupled again he was kissing her, but it was a quick kiss before he pulled away and watched her moving, kissing at her shoulders as he pushed her hair off her shoulders.</p>
            <p>Breathing a little roughly already, Beckett could feel the small explosions of heat that coiled through her body in a heady sensation with each press of his lips. She slid her hands across his back, watching him descend lower until he got to her breasts, and took them eagerly, using his mouth and hands together. She cried out his name and raked her nails over the back of his head as he moved harder inside of her suddenly. She hurried to match his pace, trying to focus on everything he was doing to her at once but having a hard time since it was nearly overwhelming. But she was able to watch him, stroking her fingers through his hair before he finally pulled away and pushed on the back of her neck. She was quick to lean down, kissing him deeply as they started to touch one another, their hands grasping each other, letting palms slide over moist skin though the sounds were masked by their lovemaking that time.</p>
            <p>Castle moved to her neck again, gently nibbling at her skin before he moved down to the junction of her neck and shoulder. He pressed four quick kisses before she made him stop and tilted his face up to her. He almost shuddered at the look on her face as they stared at each other; her eyes nearly black. But he didn't complain when she knelt down slightly and then kissed him on the lips, brushing hers carefully against him before she pulled back and stared at him again.</p>
            <p>Beckett carefully brushed her lips over Castle's cheeks, jaw and lips once more, before he tangled his fingers through her hair and held her as his kissed her firmly. She held onto him around the shoulders as they again had an unspoken agreement to increase their thrusts against one another. She moaned against his lips as he slid his free hand around to her shoulder, running it down her arm before he moved to her side, holding onto her hip once he'd reached it. They parted with a sharp breath before he was kissing around her upper body. She felt the same explosions of pleasure as before, all of it turning into white-hot bursts that gathered in her body quickly. She reached down to him and ran her fingers over his back, fingering the line of his spine as he'd done to her before.</p>
            <p>Groaning against Beckett's collarbone, Castle pulled back and brought her head down against his, their foreheads pressing against each other as they tasted each other's breath, lips brushing but not fully kissing. He was moving harder, his muscles almost getting to the point where they would begin to protest since he was trying to make sure he conveyed to her what he was feeling being inside of her. He hissed slightly when she nipped at his lower lip and they easily fell into a kiss finally. "Kate, you… can't stop," he groaned, forgetting what he was going to say when she suddenly squeezed her legs together tightly. He reached down to her hips, and moved her, since the action had slowed her down.</p>
            <p>"I won't," Beckett managed to gasp out as he kissed her scar between her breasts. She bent her head, pressing her cheek against the top of his head as he took her breasts again, and she felt her fingers starting to ache with the force she was holding onto his back. When he moved away from her she was forced to raise her head and she let him suddenly lay her back in the middle of the bed. She wrapped her legs around his waist then, their rhythm together suddenly becoming a little haphazard as they would speed up and slow down in a random pattern that was always changing. She had to soon end the kiss they had been involved in, everything culminating for her as she went rigid, crying out repeatedly in pleasure as her fingers on his shoulders went white.</p>
            <p>Castle was quick to follow her, thrusting harder then at a more even pace, but he forgot about that as he yelled shortly before he buried his face against her neck. He was a little dazed when he finally realized that everything had gone completely calm a while later, and he raised his head. He made sure Beckett was alright before he moved to lie next to her on his side. When she rolled onto her side he wrapped one arm around her, then other took her hand, entwining their fingers together before he kissed her deeply.</p>
            <p>When they pulled away, Beckett moved with him as he lay on his back so she could wrap her arms around his neck. "Reassured that dream was just a dream?" she asked.</p>
            <p>"Pretty well actually," Castle said, stroking her hip. He felt her hand on his chest, stroking it, and he looked into her eyes before saying, "I love you Kate," his voice changing in tone.</p>
            <p>"I love you Castle," Beckett said before she lay on her back at his touch to her shoulder. She took his kiss before they were soon together, and making love again. She felt the joy of his touch, and let herself be taken over by it; the fact it was their third time together never slowing her down as she responded to him eagerly and returned what he gave to her willingly.</p>
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<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Don't Want To Ever Be Far</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I have a section of lyrics and the title of the chapter is a lyric from the song Only Our Hearts by Paul McCartney from his album Kisses On the Bottom.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>"Watch out Julia," Beckett heard Castle saying as she walked towards the kitchen. "You have to catch the pancakes or else we can't eat. Ready?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, standing on a stool next to him, holding a plate.</p>
      <p>"Okay, here's the first one," Castle said, flipping the pancake onto the plate. "Oh, good catch," he said. "Here's the next one… another great catch. Your mom's been teaching you hasn't she?"</p>
      <p>"Sometimes," Beckett said, startling the two who turned to look at her. She smiled as Julia carefully set the plate on the counter and then ran over to her. "Morning sweetie," she said, picking her up and kissing her on the cheek. "Sleep good?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but it's late Castle said," Julia giggled as Beckett gently bounced her on her hip.</p>
      <p>"It is, we stayed up late last night watching <em>Dancing With the Stars</em> remember," Beckett replied before she set Julia down on the stool so she could help Castle again. "Thank you for waking me up," she told him teasingly before they shared a quick kiss.</p>
      <p>"Didn't have the heart to tell you your daughter was knocking on the door," Castle said. "But it let us make you breakfast," he said, gesturing with his spatula at the pancakes, eggs and bacon on the plates in front of Julia.</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said as she hugged Julia tightly, making her gasp in slight surprise. She kissed her daughter's cheek and said, "Thank you too sweetie for helping him."</p>
      <p>"Welcome Mommy," Julia said. She turned to her mother and hopped off the stool, taking her hand and leading her to the table. "Sit, I'll bring your pancakes when they are ready."</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said, trying not to laugh at how serious Julia was. She turned in her chair to watch her daughter run back to Castle and help him catch two more pancakes, though really he was making it as easy as he could for the little girl. She smiled as he held the plate for Julia as she got down and then her daughter walked carefully to her. "Thanks," she said, hugging her and kissing Julia's cheek gently. "What about you?"</p>
      <p>"One more thing Mommy," Julia said before she turned and ran back into the kitchen. "Are you gonna make it?" she asked Castle as he slid the stool over to the coffee machine.</p>
      <p>"Right now," he replied before he started to get everything ready and proceeded to prepare coffee for both Beckett and himself. He glanced at Julia from time to time, not surprised when she jumped up and down slightly watching him eagerly. As soon as the first cup was ready, he quickly got a toothpick, and began to run it through the foam on top.</p>
      <p>"Is it ready, is it ready?" Julia cried in a whisper.</p>
      <p>"Is what ready?" Beckett asked, watching them.</p>
      <p>"It's a surprise Mommy," Julia said quickly.</p>
      <p>"Okay, now it's ready, do you want to take it to the table and show your mom?" Castle asked as he let her look into the cup. When Julia nodded eagerly he gave her the cup and saucer, putting his hands over hers and walking with her to the table to make sure she wouldn't spill.</p>
      <p>Taking the cup quickly, Beckett smiled as she saw that the foam on top of the coffee looked like a pinwheel. She kissed Julia on the cheek and said, "Thank you sweetie, it's pretty."</p>
      <p>"I didn't make it, Castle did," Julia said seriously.</p>
      <p>"Then thank you," Beckett said to him as he came back to the table with the other two plates. She grabbed the front of his shirt and tugged on it until he was close enough for her to kiss him on the lips.</p>
      <p>"You're welcome, I should do that more often if I get that kind of reaction from you," Castle said when they parted as Julia giggled.</p>
      <p>"Feel free to," Beckett said with a smile. "Okay, sit down so you can eat, I'm sure you're starving," she told her daughter.</p>
      <p>"I am Mommy, it was hard work making breakfast," Julia said sincerely as she let her mother help her onto the chair to her left. "But it was fun."</p>
      <p>"I'm glad you still had fun," Beckett said, helping Julia with her pancakes. Once she had finished, she took a sip of her coffee and then asked Castle, "Have your mom and Alexis left?"</p>
      <p>"Not yet," he replied. "Alexis promised to call as soon as they did. But they'll get here before night I'm sure."</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said after Castle and Beckett talked about their drive two weeks before.</p>
      <p>"Yes, do you need something sweetie?" Beckett asked, turning to her.</p>
      <p>"No, are Alexis and Martha gonna watch me tonight?" Julia asked after shaking her head.</p>
      <p>"They are," Beckett said, glancing at Castle. "Are you worried?"</p>
      <p>"Little, are you gonna come back?" Julia whispered, looking down at her plate.</p>
      <p>Sighing under her breath, Beckett cupped Julia's chin to tilt her head up to look at her and said gently, "Castle and I are only going out to dinner Julia. After we finish we'll come home okay? I promise you that tomorrow morning when you get up we'll be here."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia whispered, biting her lower lip.</p>
      <p>"Come here," Beckett said, putting her napkin on the table. She slid Julia's plate next to hers and after picking up Julia's glass of apple juice, took her daughter out of her chair. "Sit here with me while you eat?" she said. She smiled when her daughter nodded eagerly and she fed her a piece of bacon before looking at Castle who'd been watching them.</p>
      <p>"If it's a problem, we don't have-" Castle started to say.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett cutting him off quickly. "We'll talk about this later," she said when he started to speak again.</p>
      <p>"Sure, how's your breakfast?" Castle said, sipping his coffee.</p>
      <p>"It's really good; even though it's brunch really. You two make some very good pancakes," Beckett said, kissing Julia's temple which made the little girl giggle.</p>
      <p>"What's brunch?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"It's supposed to be a meal in between breakfast and lunch, that you eat instead," Castle explained. He looked at his watch and said, "Actually I think we're just having a late lunch."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, we stayed up way too late," Beckett said, looking at Julia who squirmed on her lap. "But I think it was worth it."</p>
      <p>"Yeah! Veronica and Derek won," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"You regret staying up that late?" Castle said, not looking at Beckett as he cut a piece of pancake into thirds.<br/>"First, no I don't," Beckett said firmly, reaching over and putting her hand on his wrist to stop him. "And second you cut that pancake anymore you're going to have to snort it." She smiled as Julia giggled an, "Ew," and said herself, "But no, I don't regret what time we went to sleep. Or any of last night, even though Julia managed to wake up before us."</p>
      <p>"Right, good," Castle said, glancing down at her hand that was rubbing back and forth on his wrist. He put his free hand on hers to stop her and began, "We-" before his phone rang. "Sorry, probably Alexis," he said, standing up.</p>
      <p>"Is she here?" Julia asked putting her fork down with a clatter.</p>
      <p>"Not yet," Castle said a few minutes later, coming back in and sitting in his chair again. "They're just leaving now."</p>
      <p>"Good, they should get here around three," Beckett said, picking up the last piece of pancake on Julia's plate and feeding it to her daughter. "So until then, why don't we do something with you sweetie? Wait," she said quickly when Julia nearly started to speak while she was eating. "Finish eating and then tell me."</p>
      <p>After she had done so, Julia said, "Can I wear my reet?"</p>
      <p>"Reet?" Castle said in confusion.</p>
      <p>"Wreath," Beckett said. "Do you know where it is?" she asked. When Julia nodded, she set her down and said, "Go ahead and get it, be careful on the stairs though."</p>
      <p>"So," Castle said once Julia had left and he started to grab the plates off the table. "What should we do until my mother and Alexis get here?"</p>
      <p>"I'm leaving it for her to decide," Beckett said, helping him clear the table. "But we should probably stay around the house in case they're early."</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said a minute later, skipping in with her wreath from the fair in her hands. "I can't put it on. Will you help please?"</p>
      <p>Beckett took it from her and set it securely on her head before she said, "So what do you want to do now?"</p>
      <p>"Can we find shells?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle said, starting to wash the dishes. "You guys go ahead and I'll catch up."</p>
      <p>"You sure? I can wash them, you took care of making everything," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Not a problem. One thing though," Castle said, reaching out and grabbing her wrist as she turned away.</p>
      <p>"Your hand is wet," Beckett said with a smile as he pulled her against him.</p>
      <p>"Sorry, but you owe me one of those Sunday brunches you say you make Julia," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Really?" Beckett replied. She glanced at Julia who was watching them with wide eyes and she smiled saying, "Sure, but better I do that Saturday morning."</p>
      <p>"Whenever," Castle said, shrugging.</p>
      <p>"You'll owe me," Becket said once she was leaving the kitchen with Julia.</p>
      <p>"Owe you?" Castle called, turning from the sink. "But I made…" he trailed off when she looked at him over her shoulder and took a deep breath in before he returned to the dishes, trying to forget the look in Beckett's eyes as he dipped his hands inside the soapy water.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"So you're sure about dinner tonight?" Castle asked as he and Beckett were sitting on one of the benches in the front of the house, waiting for his mother and daughter to arrive.</p>
      <p>"I'm sure," Beckett said, watching Julia running around in front of the garage to their right. "I need her to get used to me being gone for something besides work."</p>
      <p>"That's right, you're not always there," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"She understands I need to be away because of that, but this is a little different," Beckett replied. "And it's only for dinner."</p>
      <p>"You don't want to leave her either," Castle stated, watching her.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said slowly. "But I do want to go out. So it's a little strange, but I need to get used to doing that myself."</p>
      <p>"We won't be going too far down the coast," Castle said. "If that's any consolation."</p>
      <p>"It is," Beckett said, smiling. "Though isn't the fact that we're going out together supposed to be the main one."</p>
      <p>"I hope so," Castle replied. "Hey, tired yourself out yet?" he asked Julia as the little girl ran over to them then, jumping against her mother.</p>
      <p>"Oof, okay, I think that's enough running for now," Beckett said, taking Julia onto her lap.</p>
      <p>"Now what? Where are Alexis and Martha?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"They'll be here soon," Beckett promised her. "Don't worry. I think though you're going to need a nap once they do get here."</p>
      <p>"Oh Mommy, please, Alexis doesn't take a nap," Julia whined. "Does she?" she then asked Castle, looking a little confused.</p>
      <p>"No," Castle chuckled. "But she did when she was your age. And boy did she complain. You wouldn't believe it."</p>
      <p>"I don't," Julia giggled.</p>
      <p>"You don't believe me?" Castle asked, tickling her side.</p>
      <p>"No!" Julia shrieked in laughter. When he squeezed her arm she then said, "Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"Yes?" Beckett asked, kissing her forehead.</p>
      <p>"Do you like my shirt, I picked it by myself," Julia said, pulling on her t-shirt so her mother could see.</p>
      <p>"I do, I think you made a great choice," Beckett replied. "Did you get dressed by yourself again?"</p>
      <p>As Julia nodded Castle commented, "I offered to help, but she said she could do it on her own. But your mom's right, that is a great shirt."</p>
      <p>"You like it too?" Julia asked a little shyly. When Castle nodded she giggled and said, "It's my favorite shirt."</p>
      <p>"She's not kidding," Beckett said as Julia slid off her lap, handing her her Stitch doll to hold. "I have to convince her some mornings she's got other shirts to wear."</p>
      <p>"I'm not surprised," Castle said, watching Julia jumping across to the other side of the driveway. "Julia," he said, glancing down to make sure a car wasn't pulling up. "Come here, I want to see your shirt again."</p>
      <p>Julia looked surprised, but she hurried across to him and said, "See? This is Paul, that's George, John and Ringo."</p>
      <p>"Right," Castle said. "And they're all holding umbrellas."</p>
      <p>"What about the colors sweetie?" Beckett asked. "Name them for me."</p>
      <p>"Red, blue, green and yellow," Julia said solemnly, pointing to each color.</p>
      <p>"Pretty good," Castle said as Beckett hugged her daughter and kissed her temple.</p>
      <p>"I know, she's going to do really well in school Monday," Beckett said as Julia wrapped her arms around her tightly and nuzzled her cheek against her shoulder. "Sure you're not sleepy?" she whispered as she picked the little girl up to place her on her lap.</p>
      <p>"No," Julia said. "Are they here yet?"</p>
      <p>"They are," Castle said, seeing a car at the end of the driveway. He stood up when there was a flash of white out of the corner of his eye and he reached down quickly, grabbing Julia before she could run down the driveway.</p>
      <p>"Julia!" Beckett said, shocked at that. "Sweetie you can't just run in the street when there's a car," she said, taking her from Castle. "Thank you," she said.</p>
      <p>"Not a problem," Castle replied.</p>
      <p>"But Mommy it wasn't a street," Julia said tearfully.</p>
      <p>"I know," Beckett sighed. "But you learned your lesson right? Never run towards a car?"</p>
      <p>"I'm sorry Mommy," Julia whispered contritely.</p>
      <p>"Okay, don't cry sweetie, I'm sure you want to say hi to Alexis," Beckett said, setting her down on the ground as the passenger door to the car opened and Martha got out.</p>
      <p>"Hello Richard, how has your vacation been?" Martha said as she hugged her son.</p>
      <p>"Really good, how was the drive?" Castle asked as he turned to Alexis who was coming around to them.</p>
      <p>"Good, we listened to a James Joyce book on the way up," Alexis said, hugging her father tightly. "It was… entertaining."</p>
      <p>"I suggested to Alexis we should have listen to Shakespeare, one of his comedies to lighten the mood, but she insisted on <em>Dubliners</em>," Martha said.</p>
      <p>"I would have agreed with you," Castle whispered to Alexis who laughed slightly. "Better book."</p>
      <p>"Hello Kate," Martha was saying as she walked over to where Beckett and Julia were standing at the bench.</p>
      <p>"Hello Martha, I'm really glad to see you both got here alright," Beckett said, hugging her briefly. "Julia was waiting pretty eagerly to see you."</p>
      <p>"Oh and here she is, the prima ballerina," Martha said exuberantly looking down at the little girl. "<em>Brava</em> my dear, you danced beautifully."</p>
      <p>"You saw me dancing?" Julia whispered, her cheeks flushed.</p>
      <p>"We did, as soon as we got home the day of your recital we watched your performance," Alexis said as Julia ran over to her and hugged her around the legs. "And Gram's right, you were great."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia giggled. "Thank you Martha."</p>
      <p>"You're very welcome, now why don't we head inside, I am parched and could use a nice Bordeaux," Martha said. "Richard, would you mind getting my bag?"</p>
      <p>"I've got it Mother," Castle said, smiling as she grabbed Beckett's arm and turned her inside. "What's wrong?" he asked Alexis, seeing her frowning slightly.</p>
      <p>"Gram got a call from Michel Parveau," Alexis said. "On the way up, and he invited her to a party he's holding at his place tonight."</p>
      <p>"Why is that a problem?" Castle asked, handing her her suitcase.</p>
      <p>"Aren't you and Beckett going out to dinner?" Alexis asked.</p>
      <p>"I'm sure she wouldn't mind if you watched Julia on your own," Castle said, ushering her and Julia; who was listening to them with a serious expression on her face; up to the house. "Unless you've got plans with your friends?"</p>
      <p>"No, I'm free to watch her," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Then just tell her, I'm sure she'll be fine with it," Castle said, closing the screen door once they were inside.</p>
      <p>"Tell her what?" Beckett asked, coming into the foyer then, Martha behind her.</p>
      <p>"Oh, Alexis is concerned because I was invited to a friend's home for dinner tonight," Martha said, sipping her wine. "And she's not sure if you'll agree to her watching Julia on her own."</p>
      <p>"Mommy, please, can Alexis watch me?" Julia asked before her mother could speak, running over to her and grabbing her hand.</p>
      <p>"Why wouldn't I be alright with that?" Beckett asked. She looked at Alexis and said, "If we stick with this plan of you and your grandmother watching Julia after school, I'm sure there will come a time when you'll be watching her by yourself. And that's fine with me. So tonight you're welcome to babysit my daughter. You don't have plans you're cancelling for that though are you?"</p>
      <p>"No, I don't until Friday," Alexis said. She looked at Castle and said, "Jeannie invited me on her parents' boat for an end of summer party."</p>
      <p>"Sounds great, who's driving their boat though?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Her dad," Alexis said. "Her mom will be there too, to make sure we don't destroy the boat. You know how much they love it."</p>
      <p>"I do, Jerry's protective of that thing," Castle said. "Should be fun for you. So I think we have everything settled here, right?"</p>
      <p>"I'll be in my room," Martha said then. "Unpacking and taking a <em>petit somme</em> before the party tonight."</p>
      <p>"I think I'll do the same," Alexis said, picking up her suitcase. "Except for a nap."</p>
      <p>"Can I go with you?" Julia asked eagerly, jumping over to her and grabbing her hand.</p>
      <p>"You can," Beckett said when Julia looked at her. "But you still need to take-" She stopped when Castle put his hand on her arm and she turned to him.</p>
      <p>"She might have a hard time sleeping tonight," he explained. "But if she's tired…"</p>
      <p>"Good point," Beckett said. "Go ahead sweetie, you can show Alexis your fish too after she unpacks."</p>
      <p>"You got a fish?" Alexis asked as she walked up the stairs with Julia.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Castle won it for me," Julia said excitedly.</p>
      <p>Smiling at her daughter's rapid speech, Beckett looked at Castle and said, "Should be interesting to see what they do tonight."</p>
      <p>"At least she trusts Alexis already, so you don't need to worry about that," he replied before they walked over to the kitchen. "But you're okay with this?"</p>
      <p>"I know your daughter Castle," Beckett said. "And I know she's very trustworthy. I just worry about how Julia's going to be. But I get the feeling that Alexis will distract her from me being gone."</p>
      <p>"I'm sure she will," Castle said, pouring them a glass of wine each. "I'd like to go up and talk to my daughter," he said, picking up his glass.</p>
      <p>"And I'd like to check on mine," Beckett said before she followed him over to the stairs. She could hear her daughter's excited talking, coming from Julia's room instead of Alexis' and she walked ahead of Castle, peering inside once she had reached the doorway.</p>
      <p>"So I named him Kauai," Julia was telling Alexis. "And see I put Stitch and Lilo and Nani in there too."</p>
      <p>"That's pretty cute," Alexis said, looking into the tank.</p>
      <p>"It was fun," Julia giggled. "I tried to get the fishy myself, but I threw it at a man."</p>
      <p>"Was pretty amazing," Castle said behind Beckett before they walked inside. "If we'd been at the dunk tank there was she would have nailed the target."</p>
      <p>"Good thing it was just a ping-pong ball," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Did you finish unpacking already?" Beckett then asked.</p>
      <p>"No, I wanted to see her fish before I did," Alexis said. "I'll go and do that now."</p>
      <p>"Come here sweetie," Beckett said to Julia after Alexis and then Castle had left the room. She sat on the bed and picked up her daughter, setting her on her lap.</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said as she took some strands of Beckett's hair and started to twist them together. "Alexis will watch me tonight?"</p>
      <p>"She is," Beckett replied. "So someone will be with you."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said slowly. "Mommy," she began to say before hesitating. When her mother urged her to speak she whispered, "Can't we go with you and Castle?"</p>
      <p>"Julia, I wanted you to spend some time with Alexis while we're here," Beckett said, kissing her forehead. "And you know when you start school and if I'm working she might take care of you."</p>
      <p>"I know," Julia said quickly. "But I want to go with you too."</p>
      <p>"Ah, so now I think she doesn't want to be left out," Castle said from the doorway. He smiled when the two looked up at him and said, "We're just going to go out tonight Julia. After that we'll be having dinners with you again. Well, not tomorrow night. Are you sure you still want to do that Kate?"</p>
      <p>"I told you, you should spend some time with your mom and Alexis," Beckett said. "But he's right sweetie, we're going out to dinner by ourselves tonight and just tonight while we're here," she then directed to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Will you go more without me?" Julia asked softly.</p>
      <p>"Yes, but not all the time, don't worry," Beckett assured her. "But you'll be with Alexis, you two can go down to the beach, or get something for dessert if she doesn't mind taking you."</p>
      <p>"Can we watching <em>Dancing With the Stars</em>?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, we can have a marathon," Alexis said, appearing in the doorway suddenly, holding a hanger and a blouse. "Sorry, I could hear you across the hall."</p>
      <p>"Did you watch and see Derek win tonight?" Julia asked so fast that the others almost couldn't understand her.</p>
      <p>"I think she means last night," Beckett said, trying to hold back her laughter at her daughter's enthusiasm.</p>
      <p>"I did, and you're a fan of Derek too?" Alexis asked. When Julia nodded frantically she laughed and said, "Me too, I was so happy he won, he and Veronica were the best."</p>
      <p>"That's what Castle said," Julia said. "So we can watch tonight?"</p>
      <p>"Sure," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Of just Derek?" Julia asked, bouncing on her mother's lap.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Alexis said. She smiled at her dad when Julia squirmed in joy and said, "Oh, Beckett, would you mind if I took her to this French place a couple blocks away? For dinner?"</p>
      <p>"That's fine," Beckett said. "She's partial to most dishes; she'll tell you what she likes. It's not too fancy is it?"</p>
      <p>"No, a French chef came here and started a more family oriented café," Castle said. "It's really good, should have taken you there but I didn't realize Julia liked French food."</p>
      <p>"It depends on what there is," Beckett said with a smile. "But my dad took us to a place and we both enjoyed it. Didn't we?" she asked Julia who was watching them solemnly.</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, hugging Beckett around the waist. "When do we go?"</p>
      <p>"Later, after your mom and my dad leave for their dinner," Alexis said. "I'm going to finish unpacking though, and after will you show me the shells you found Julia?"</p>
      <p>"I will," Julia said happily. "They're outside." She slid off her mother's lap with her help and then ran over to Alexis asking, "Can I watch you pack?"</p>
      <p>"Unpack, yeah, come on," Alexis said, holding out her hand to the little girl.</p>
      <p>"I never thought about how she might feel left out," Beckett said when she and Castle were alone in the room. She stood up and said, "But it makes sense, this is the first time we're going out without her. It must confuse her."</p>
      <p>"It sounds like she and Alexis have their own plans now," Castle said as her led her over to the stairs. "Julia will be fine."</p>
      <p>Beckett nodded, knowing he was right and she said as they walked down the stairs, "I should get Alexis to baby sit every time we want to go out."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, would keep her away from the guys in her dorm," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Or maybe not, if she heard you say that I don't think she'd be too happy," Beckett said, shaking her head as she smiled at his exaggerated solemn tone.</p>
      <p>"Was worth a try," Castle said with a shrug as he pulled Beckett outside as she laughed softly, their hands squeezing each other's firmly.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"So what do you think sweetie?" Beckett said, letting Julia see her reflection in the mirror.</p>
      <p>"It's pretty, thank you Mommy," Julia said happily as she touched the two French braids on the sides of her hair. "Can I still watch you get ready?"</p>
      <p>"I told you yes," Beckett said. "Come on, I need to hurry or else I'll make me and Castle late," she told her daughter, taking her hand and leading her into the bathroom.</p>
      <p>"What are you gonna do when you go to the place Mommy?" Julia asked, leaning against the wall next to the door as she watched her mother put on her makeup.</p>
      <p>"Well we're going to have dinner, it is a restaurant," Beckett said with a smile, looking down at her. "And after I'm not sure, we'll see what happens."</p>
      <p>"It sounds boring, why don't you go to the fair? Castle can win you a goldfish too!" Julia said excitedly.</p>
      <p>"I think Kauai is enough," Beckett said, laughing slightly. "But you know you could go with Alexis if you wanted, I think it's still going on."</p>
      <p>"No, I wanna watch Derek dancing with her," Julia said. "And I don't wanna go without you Mommy."</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said with a smile. She turned to her daughter and ushered her out to the coffee table in front of the fireplace before she hurried to get changed. "Sweetie," she said, going over to Julia. "Want to help me?" she asked.</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, jumping up from the small seat she was sitting on to get on the bed. She pulled up the zipper on her mother's dress and clapped as Beckett turned around. "You look so pretty Mommy!"</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said smiling as she kissed her forehead as she picked her up. "And so do you. We better go, I'm sure you're hungry."</p>
      <p>"Yes," Julia said as she wrapped her arms around her mother's neck.</p>
      <p>"Just in time for me to say goodbye," Martha said, spotting Beckett and Julia coming down into the foyer first. "Julia you look adorable," she said as Beckett set her daughter down.</p>
      <p>"Thank you, I like your dress," Julia said shyly. "It's pretty."</p>
      <p>"That's so sweet of you to say," Martha replied with a smile. "Your daughter has good taste I see," she said to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Thanks," Beckett said. "Have fun at your party."</p>
      <p>"Oh I will, Richard, Alexis, don't wait up for me," Martha said, turning to the open door. "And have fun tonight, all of you."</p>
      <p>"You too Gram," Alexis called with a smile as Martha got into a car that had pulled up. She turned to her father and Beckett and said, "So anything I need to know before we go?"</p>
      <p>"Not really," Beckett said. "I gave her a bath so you don't need to worry about that. Try if you can to put her to bed at about seven thirty, or eight. And she likes to be read to before bed; I have her book in her room-"</p>
      <p>"I want you to read to me Mommy," Julia interrupted, grabbing her mother's arm tightly.</p>
      <p>"Oh, alright, well, do you have any books you could read to her?" Beckett asked Castle and Alexis.</p>
      <p>"<em>Alice in Wonderland</em>," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Perfect, go ahead and read that to her," Beckett said as they walked outside. "And I know you know the phone numbers you need, so you're all set."</p>
      <p>"Right, I'll take care of Julia, don't worry," Alexis said. "Oh, I was going to take her to an ice cream shop by the café where we're going to eat, is that alright?"</p>
      <p>"That's fine. And I know you'll take care of her too," Beckett said with a smile before she leaned down and gathered Julia into her arms. "Hmm, I'll miss you sweetie," she said, kissing her cheek.</p>
      <p>"Me too, but Mommy you have to have fun too, with Castle," Julia said seriously, touching the pendant of the necklace her mother was wearing.</p>
      <p>"I'll make sure she does," Castle told Julia, who smiled up at him widely. "You watch out for Alexis tonight Julia, okay?"</p>
      <p>"And she watches me?" Julia asked. When Castle nodded she nodded back to him and said sincerely, "I promise I will."</p>
      <p>"Goodnight sweetie," Beckett said then as Alexis hugged her father. "And I'll come up to see you when we come back."</p>
      <p>"Promise?" Julia asked, her voice growing small.</p>
      <p>"I will, have fun and I love you so much Julia," Beckett said softly as she could tell her daughter was becoming nervous. She shared a quick kiss with her before she stood and waited for Alexis to take Julia's hand. "Be safe," she couldn't help saying as she looked at the little girl.</p>
      <p>"We will, don't worry," Alexis said reassuringly.</p>
      <p>"Kate," Castle said, touching her back gently.</p>
      <p>Nodding, Beckett got into the car and waved at the two, a little dismayed when Julia started to step towards the car before Alexis stopped her. She quickly blew a kiss to her daughter before Castle drove down the driveway, and she sighed, sitting back in the passenger seat. "I was afraid she might cry," she said after they were on the road.</p>
      <p>"No, but I'm sure she'll recover," Castle said. "You know Alexis will definitely keep a close watch on her."</p>
      <p>"Right," Beckett said. "So you never really told me much about this place in Southampton Castle, what's the big secret?"</p>
      <p>Smiling, Castle looked at her and said, "I'm planning on it being a surprise. Don't worry, it'll be good."</p>
      <p>"You're extremely sure of yourself," Beckett said, shaking her head.</p>
      <p>"Because I know I'm right," Castle said confidently. He laughed when she hit his arm and said, "You'll see." He glanced at her and saw her rolling her eyes before he said, "You do look beautiful though Kate."</p>
      <p>"Thanks," Beckett said, touching the pendant of her necklace. "You look pretty good tonight."</p>
      <p>Castle reached over and gently squeezed her hand as a way of saying thank you before he turned his attention back to the road. "I will tell you one thing about the place," he said as Beckett turned on the radio. "It's French."</p>
      <p>"Really? Sure it's not the café Alexis and Julia are going to?" Beckett asked jokingly.</p>
      <p>"I'm sure, though if you wanted to we could turn back and meet them there," Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Keep driving," Beckett said with a slight smile. "It's tempting though," she said after the car was quiet except for the music playing low.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but we have Saturday dinner remember, with my mother too," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I do," Beckett said, smiling. "It'll be a little depressing, the last full day of vacation."</p>
      <p>"I know, it's been fun though," Castle said, smiling at her.</p>
      <p>"A lot, thank you," Beckett said, looking serious then.</p>
      <p>"For bringing you two here?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes, but also for doing so much for Julia," Beckett said softly.</p>
      <p>"I was happy to do it, I hope I can keep helping her out if she needs it back in the city," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"You can," Beckett commented. "And you're welcome to come over to my place more."</p>
      <p>"Vice versa," Castle said. "Especially since Julia's going to be at my place a lot."</p>
      <p>"That's true," Beckett said with a smile. "And again, thank you for giving your mom the idea to take care of Julia."</p>
      <p>"You're welcome," Castle said. He reached over to Beckett's hand again, and squeezed it tightly before holding onto it as he continued to drive along the coast.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Hi, there's two of us," Alexis said as she and Julia entered the French café near the beach house. "And can I get a child's menu and a booster seat?" she told the hostess as they were led back outside.</p>
      <p>"We don't eat inside?" Julia asked, holding onto Alexis' hand tightly.</p>
      <p>"Do you want to? I thought you would like to sit out here," Alexis said while she waited for the hostess to set the booster seat on one of the café table chairs.</p>
      <p>"No, I want to eat here," Julia said happily as Alexis lifted her up into her seat. She grabbed one of the crayons on the child's menu in front of her and started to color in the picture on it.</p>
      <p>"What do you want to drink?" Alexis asked, touching the little girl's arm to get her attention.</p>
      <p>"Apple juice please," Julia said shyly. "And can I have to eat crêpes?"</p>
      <p>"Sure, what do you want in them though?" Alexis asked. When the little girl asked her what was in them she quickly read the menu before she ordered for them both. "Why don't we try and see if we can go through that maze?" she asked as Julia looked at her blue crayon.</p>
      <p>"Alexis," Julia said in a whisper after they had done the maze on the menu and their food had been served.</p>
      <p>"Are you okay?" Alexis asked in slight concern as she looked up at the little girl.</p>
      <p>"Is Castle gonna stay with my mommy for dinner and before they come home?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Oh, of course he is, it's a date, so they're going to be together," Alexis assured her. "Don't worry; nothing's going to happen to your mother."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said. She ate some of her crêpe at Alexis' urging before she said, "Alexis, my mommy told me before, but I don't know what is a date."</p>
      <p>Alexis wasn't too surprised Julia was still confused, and she thought a moment, thinking about how to explain it better than Beckett had. She finally said, "It's when you go with someone you think you like a lot-"</p>
      <p>"You mean you think you love them?" Julia cut in.</p>
      <p>"Sometimes, but a lot of times you like the other person a lot and a date lets you go out and see if you might love them by getting to know them better," Alexis said. "And if a couple is in love then a date is for them to be alone."</p>
      <p>"Like my mommy and Castle," Julia stated. When Alexis nodded she smiled and said, "That's why I came here with you."</p>
      <p>"It is, but I heard you went out a lot with them both before my gram and I got here," Alexis said, glad to see a smile on her face.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, it was fun, Castle's funny," Julia said, biting her lower lip as she looked a little nervous.</p>
      <p>"He is, I'm glad you like him now," Alexis said. "But eat more Julia; your mom will get mad at me if you're hungry later."</p>
      <p>"Do we still get ice cream?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but if you eat your crêpe and <em>pomme frites</em>," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"You talk in French?" Julia asked after eating a little.</p>
      <p>"I can, and I learned German in school too," Alexis answered.</p>
      <p>"My mommy's teaching me Russia," Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Russian? I forgot she knows how to speak that," Alexis said. "What do you know how to say?"</p>
      <p>"<em>Privjet, menya zovut Julia</em>," she said proudly, pronouncing the words carefully.</p>
      <p>"Wow, that's really good," Alexis said, impressed. "Is that 'hello my name is'?" When Julia nodded, blushing a little at her compliment she said, "You learned very well, I don't know a lot of four year olds who can speak Russian."</p>
      <p>"Mommy said that too," Julia said with a giggle. "Does Castle?"</p>
      <p>"No, you should say something to him in Russian, I bet he'll be really surprised," Alexis said, smiling as Julia giggled and nodded eagerly. She then urged the little girl to go back to eating and they chatted about what they might do the next day with Castle and Beckett before they had finished and she was paying. "Okay, are you sure you still want ice cream? You're not too full?"</p>
      <p>Shaking her head as she skipped next to Alexis as they walked down the sidewalk, Julia said, "No, I wanna get one in a cone and I won't drop it, I promise."</p>
      <p>Smiling at how much Julia had changed since she had first met the little girl, Alexis started skipping with her. She laughed when Julia looked up at her with wide eyes and then gave a short shriek of laughter before they skipped the rest of the way to the ice cream shop. "Okay," she said breathlessly when they reached the open door and Julia jumped onto the rug inside. "Let's see what we'll have," she said.</p>
      <p>"What's that?" Julia asked, looking at a family sitting at a table.</p>
      <p>"That's a sundae, I don't think you can eat all of that though," Alexis said, glancing over and seeing the huge dessert in the middle of the table.</p>
      <p>"But what about for my mommy and Castle, and Martha, we can eat it together," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"They're not going to get home in time," Alexis said gently. "But why don't we get a small one for us to share back at the house?"</p>
      <p>"Oh please, please!" Julia said excitedly.</p>
      <p>"Good evening," the worker behind the counter said as Alexis and Julia walked up to the counter. "What can I get for you and your sister?" she asked Alexis.</p>
      <p>"We'll have your hot fudge sundae," Alexis said quickly as she felt Julia tense next to her for a moment. "What kind of ice cream do you want in it?" she asked the little girl.</p>
      <p>"Fruit ones?" Julia said shyly.</p>
      <p>"Okay, do you like pineapple? How about mango and passionfruit?" Alexis said, Julia nodding at each flavor. "We'll have those." After she had paid for the sundae she told the worker, "We'll take that to go."</p>
      <p>"Great, I'll call your number when it's ready," the woman said, smiling at Julia.</p>
      <p>"Alexis, why did she say we were sisters?" Julia asked softly as she spun at one of the seats at the counter.</p>
      <p>"I think it's because our hair is a red color, even though it's not the same," Alexis said. "Did you not like her saying that?"</p>
      <p>"I did, but it's a lie isn't it?" Julia said worriedly.</p>
      <p>"No, she just doesn't know," Alexis assured her. She saw the little girl was still concerned so she said quickly, "Are you excited to get to see Paul live in October?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah! I'm happy, I want to see Paul play, and maybe he will sign my record!" Julia said happily.</p>
      <p>Before Alexis could ask what she was talking about, their number was called and she waited until they were walking back to the beach house to ask, "What record Julia?"</p>
      <p>"My mommy bought me a record that's Paul's and I want to throw it to him at the show," Julia explained, skipping as she held Alexis' hand. "So he can put his name on it."</p>
      <p>"Good idea," Alexis said. "I hope he does sign it for you."</p>
      <p>"Are you excited to go?" Julia asked her.</p>
      <p>"Oh yeah, a lot, you know my gram loves The Beatles, and my dad likes Paul a lot, so I know their music," Alexis replied with a smile as she had to slow Julia down.</p>
      <p>"Do you love his music? I do! Oh, and George, do you like the music George sings? I love his, oh; can we see his video when we get home?" Julia asked, sounding a little hyper.</p>
      <p>"Easy," Alexis laughed. "I don't think I've really heard George's music besides what he wrote for The Beatles. And what video are you talking about?" she said.</p>
      <p>"I'll show you, before we watch Derek," Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>Alexis was happy to see that Julia didn't seemed to be thinking about Beckett anymore, and she hurried the rest of the way home with her. As they entered the beach house, she made a mental note to herself to keep her distracted, hoping she could keep Julia happy since she knew Beckett was likely thinking about her daughter. She only hoped it wasn't ruining the date. She shook herself from her thoughts as Julia went to the family room and she said, "Okay, let's get started on the sundae and we can watch that video."</p>
      <p>Julia clapped and said, "Yay, I can't wait to watch it with you," she giggled. She settled herself in next to Alexis as they watched the music video starting. She hadn't forgotten Beckett, but she didn't want Alexis to see she was still scared her mother might not return. She shivered at the thought and hurriedly jumped off the couch, dancing in time to the music, wondering what her mother was doing that moment, hoping she was having much fun as she was having herself.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"I don't think I was more embarrassed," Beckett said with a laugh as she shook her head. "Luckily my friends didn't see me, so I didn't get teased about it."</p>
      <p>"They wouldn't have done that too badly would they?" Castle asked before taking a sip of his wine.</p>
      <p>"Who knows," Beckett said with a shrug. "But it's funny now that I'm looking back on it."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, the embarrassing moments tend to be like that," Castle replied. "So what do you think?"</p>
      <p>"About here?" Beckett said, looking around. "I'll admit, I'm pleasantly surprised. How's the food?"</p>
      <p>"Really good," Castle said. "Meaning the portions aren't microscopic."</p>
      <p>"Always a good thing," Beckett said when the host walked over to them. She stood up and walked with Castle after the man outside.</p>
      <p>"I'm really glad the weather cooperated," Castle commented as he politely brushed aside the host and helped Beckett into her chair.</p>
      <p>"So am I, this is amazing," she said to him as they took their menus.</p>
      <p>"This was somewhere else I wanted to take you, the first time you came here," Castle said when they were alone.</p>
      <p>"Too bad we didn't manage to make it, but I still enjoyed that trip… although really, I would have loved a normal vacation," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>Castle was about to protest that, when she smiled and he said, "I almost fell for that."</p>
      <p>"I wondered how long I could keep that up," Beckett replied. They were quiet for a moment and she then said, "But I am really glad that nothing happened this time."</p>
      <p>"Me too, I hate to think of how it would be for Julia if we investigated another case," Castle said. At Beckett's look he asked, "What?"</p>
      <p>"You would have been investigating on your own," Beckett said simply. "I wouldn't have left my daughter on her own to look into another case for the Hamptons PD."</p>
      <p>"I have a hard time believing that," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Who would I have left Julia with?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"Rebecca Foster," Castle simply. He smiled when she rolled her eyes and said, "Okay, maybe not, but at least we didn't have to figure that out. Although the vacation isn't over yet."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I don't think I'd investigate even though your mom and Alexis are here," Beckett said. "I'd like to spend as much time with my daughter as possible before she starts school."</p>
      <p>Castle wanted to ask her something along that line of conversation, but he held back until they had ordered. "You're not feeling guilty we came here on our own are you?" he said once they were alone again and had their glasses of wine.</p>
      <p>"No, I'm just hoping Julia will be alright," Beckett said honestly. "But I don't really want to keep thinking about how she's doing. It'll end up driving me crazy until I see her." She took a deep breath before saying, "Tell me about Alexis' schedule this semester."</p>
      <p>Knowing that she needed the distraction, Castle quickly started to speak about his daughter's upcoming classes at Columbia. He was relieved to see that she didn't seem to be thinking about her daughter, and he was able to keep up that line of conversation until their food arrived.</p>
      <p>"You know," Beckett said after they had eaten in silence at first. "I remember my first semester at Stanford. How nervous I was, and homesick."</p>
      <p>"I wondered about that, you never mentioned what it was like going across the country for college," Castle commented.</p>
      <p>"It was tough at first," Beckett said. "But I talked to my parents a lot in the beginning, and once I started school, things got so busy I forgot about missing home. Though missing my mom and dad never stopped. But I knew they were proud of me for getting into the college, and I wanted to make sure they always were. So I got over it eventually."</p>
      <p>"But you still missed home," Castle stated. When Beckett nodded he smiled slightly and said, "Yeah, Alexis still does miss home though she's over all the time. Which I'm really happy about; even her quick visits for laundry."</p>
      <p>"Doesn't surprise me," Beckett laughed softly. "What would you both have done if she went to Stanford?"</p>
      <p>"I don't even want to think about that," Castle said. He laughed with Beckett and said, "No, I would have missed her, but if it was what she wanted…"</p>
      <p>"That's how my dad was, but he did want me to go to a good school at the same time," Beckett said. "Being a parent is an emotional roller coaster I've realized."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, you'll get that a lot," Castle said. "But Julia's still only four."</p>
      <p>"She is," Beckett hesitated. When he looked at her questioningly she said, "With what's happened to her… I still have difficult moments as her mother. It's not smooth sailing."</p>
      <p>"But would you want to give her up to not have to deal with that?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said firmly, and a little louder than she'd meant to. She looked around them and said a little more quietly, "No, I would never give up Julia. It's just something that's always going through my head. A wish that she was just a normal four year old." She felt the mood was getting a little serious so she quickly said, "So, speaking of my daughter, any ideas what we'll do tomorrow now your daughter and mother are here?"</p>
      <p>Castle knew she wanted to change to subject again, so he quickly made a few suggestions of what they could do the next day. They were able to continue that topic through into dessert when he glanced over at the table to his right and saw the man sitting there handing a piece of paper to a waitress.</p>
      <p>"What is it?" Beckett asked, sipping her coffee as she watched him.</p>
      <p>"Hold on," Castle said before he got up and walked over to the door leading back inside the restaurant.</p>
      <p>Glancing up from her plate, Beckett saw Castle coming back to her and she said, "Everything okay?"</p>
      <p>"Yes, I was just checking on something," Castle said. "I was a little confused." He waited a second before he heard a new song start to play over the audio system the restaurant had outside and he held out his hand to Beckett. "Dance with me?" he asked.</p>
      <p>Smiling, Beckett quickly put her napkin on the table and took his hand, letting him lead the way to a clear area of the patio seating. She turned to him and said, "Is this why you went inside?" as she wrapped her arm around his neck and their other hands stayed clasped together, his left hand on her back.</p>
      <p>"Apparently you can request songs, I thought it was someone playing live, but they have a DJ," Castle commented.</p>
      <p>"Interesting choice," Beckett said, listening to the lyrics. "Julia would be really happy hearing it."</p>
      <p>"I know, but it is a good song," Castle said. "I think if she saw us though, she'd wonder why the hell we're not dancing a Waltz." He saw the look on Beckett's face and said, "Viennese Waltz?"</p>
      <p>"I don't know," Beckett said, smiling slightly. "But I wouldn't want to try it."</p>
      <p>"I think you'd be a good ballroom dancer," Castle said. "Me on the other hand…"</p>
      <p>"You could be," Beckett said. "You ever want to take dancing lessons in the future, give me a call."</p>
      <p>"You'd go?" Castle asked in surprise.</p>
      <p>"To watch you, yes," Beckett said with a smile.</p>
      <p>"I see how it is," Castle said before they shared a laugh. He held her closer then, as a few other couples were dancing by them, and he said, "It's a good song."</p>
      <p>"It is," Beckett said absently, listening to the lyrics. Castle's request had been the song <em>Only Our Hearts</em>, by Paul McCartney, a song that she knew very well from Julia. She liked the lyrics but wondered if he'd chosen it for the lyrics or the music.</p>
      <p>"I just like the chorus," Castle said suddenly, seeming to guess what she was thinking just before the chorus started to play.</p>
      <p>
        <em>Hoping to be where you are</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Of longing to be your lover</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Don't want to ever be far</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Apart from you my love</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em>But only our hearts will know</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> If we're going to spend it together</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Only gone to the dreams that we share</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Only our hearts, know how much love is there</em>
      </p>
      <p>"It's nice," Beckett said with a smile before she let go of his hand and wrapped her arms around his neck. She felt his hands on her back, and pressed her cheek to his as they continued to sway to the rhythm of the song, together.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"I would have thought you'd want to head back to the house," Castle commented as he walked onto the sand with Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Not yet," she replied as she walked over to a log that was on the beach. "Did you want to go back?"</p>
      <p>"No, I'm fine," Castle said quickly, taking off his blazer and setting it on the log before he sat down with her. "Any reason why you wanted to stop here?" he asked as they looked at the waves.</p>
      <p>"I just felt like walking on the beach," Beckett said, glancing at him. "That was a really nice dinner. It was nice to go back to that."</p>
      <p>"It's been a while," Castle said, quickly sensing what she wasn't saying. "But since things changed for us, for you especially, it's understandable."</p>
      <p>"Good," Beckett said slowly.</p>
      <p>"What is it?" Castle asked, knowing she was holding something back from him.</p>
      <p>Beckett hesitated as he took her hand and slid his fingers through hers, watching him as he did so. She glanced up and saw the encouraging look on his face before she braced herself and started to speak. "There's something I've wanted to ask you, since I knew more about you and your… family," she began, stopping in case he figured out what she wanted to say.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Castle said, a little confused since he couldn't really read her that well as she seemed to still holding back in her uneasiness.</p>
      <p>Seeing that she had no choice but to continue on her own, Beckett glanced down at their hands and finally said, "I've always wondered, does it bother you not knowing who your father is? And please Rick, don't, don't try and brush it off. I want to know whether this is something that bothers you, or you honestly don't care."</p>
      <p>For a moment, Castle wasn't sure if he should really answer her, or just avert the question. But looking into Beckett's eyes, he could see she wanted to know, and he knew if there was anyone he'd trust in with an honest answer, it was her. He exhaled as he made a decision, and then said, "It did bother me, because I had no idea if he was the kind of man I wanted to know or not. That was always a problem; he could be a nice guy or a complete jackass. I wanted to know who he was when Alexis was born, because I was really not sure about being a father. But… he wouldn't have known either since he hadn't raised me and things turned out alright with that in the end. I like to think I turned out to be a good father."</p>
      <p>"You are," Beckett said, her left hand on his arm, squeezing it reassuringly.</p>
      <p>"But as Alexis grew up, I always wished she had her grandfather," Castle said. "But it was a 50-50 thing; I had no idea what kind of man he was. It was a little disturbing to think of the possibility that I might find him or he'd find us, and hurt his granddaughter and my mother. But I always did want to at least know who he was, just so I had a name and maybe could see what he looked like. It's always bothered me Kate, the not knowing and being unsure about him, whoever he was."</p>
      <p>"You're using the past tense," Beckett said simply.</p>
      <p>"When the first Nikki Heat book was published," Castle said, sighing deeply. "I took some of that money and hired the best PI I could. With FBI and CIA connections because I wanted to cover my bases. And he looked into it for a year before he finally came to me with what he was able to find out."</p>
      <p>Beckett squeezed his arm a little tighter that time, knowing it was unlikely to be good as he paused and looked at the breaking waves.</p>
      <p>"It was dead end after dead end," Castle said, looking at her. "And he tried everywhere he could. Told me it was pretty likely that he had passed away by now, whoever he was. And he's right, I looked at everything he found, and there's nothing that says definitively who my father is."</p>
      <p>"You've never told your mother," Beckett stated.</p>
      <p>"I don't know if I can," Castle said with a sigh. "I don't like to think about it myself; I don't want to throw that into her face."</p>
      <p>"Does anyone else know about this?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"Besides me and the PI, you," Castle said, looking at her.</p>
      <p>"I'm so sorry Castle," Beckett said, unsure of what else to say, though she was touched at his trusting her.</p>
      <p>"It's okay, I figure; and this is something I told Alexis when she asked me about this too," Castle said. "With whoever my father is, he could have been a great man. I like to think that he was." He was quiet then as Beckett rubbed his arm and he then said, hesitating himself, "What about Julia's father?"</p>
      <p>Looking a little uncomfortable for a moment, Beckett said, "What about him?"</p>
      <p>"Has she ever asked who he is?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said. She was looking down at the water, but she could feel his gaze on her, so she finally sighed and said, "What can I tell her Castle? Honestly? I don't know anything about him, besides his name, a little of his past, and what he looked like."</p>
      <p>"What if she asks though?" Castle said as Beckett stood up and walked down to the water's edge. He quickly followed her and said, "You don't know what to do?"</p>
      <p>"No, I wasn't kidding about that," Beckett sighed. "And with me not being Julia's birth mother… it worries me that she might figure that out with me not knowing much about her father."</p>
      <p>"Did you talk to her psychiatrist about what you can do?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes, she said I shouldn't bring up the subject," Beckett said simply. "Wait until she asks me herself and tell her the truth. Of course I pointed out that Julia might ask before she gets her memory about her mother back, and the doctor said just tell her the basics."</p>
      <p>"Which would be what?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"That he was a nice man," Beckett said. "Which annoyed me but she's a good doctor, she's helped Julia a lot."</p>
      <p>"Do you still have his picture?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes, I have a copy, it's with the box of albums from her mother that's at my dad's cabin," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"You know," Castle said slowly after they were quiet. "That's part of the reason why I wanted her not to be so terrified of me."</p>
      <p>Beckett didn't reply for a moment before she looked up at him and said, "That's why I wanted you to be a part of our lives. To help Julia with her fear of men. And…"</p>
      <p>"I wanted that," Castle said quickly, knowing why she had trailed off. "It's why I came with you here instead of going to Atlantic City. I would love to be a father figure to her if you and her want me to be."</p>
      <p>"She needs that," Beckett said in obvious relief. "Her doctor's told me that she needs to be around men more, to get over her fear. She…" She paused before she then said, "She suggested me having a boyfriend would help, though to be really careful about who that is."</p>
      <p>"And you're sure I'm right for that?" Castle asked. "Because I know I don't always act my age and-"</p>
      <p>"Castle," Beckett said, stopping him by grabbing his arms. "You seem to be forgetting Alexis, you're a father already."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but I have my… foibles as a parent, you know me," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"You do, but I'm sure I'll have my own quirks as Julia grows up," Beckett said, shrugging. "But I'm sure that I want you to be part of Julia's life too. If I wasn't, I would have broken things off between us after I adopted her."</p>
      <p>Castle knew she was right, and he said, "I'll do the best I can to make sure you don't regret that."</p>
      <p>"I never have," Beckett said with a smile. "I don't think I ever will, not with how you are with her." She then wrapped her arms around him as he did the same to her and they kissed. When they parted she said, "Let's go home."</p>
      <p>Smiling, Castle took her hand and led the way back up the sand to grab his jacket before they headed to his car, holding onto Beckett's hand tightly.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Hey, how was dinner?"Alexis asked, looking up as Beckett walked up to the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"It was nice, how's Julia?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"She's asleep," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"How was she while we were gone?" Beckett then said as she took some popcorn from the bowl Alexis held out to her.</p>
      <p>"She was fine, she did go to the front door a couple of times to see if you were back," Alexis answered. "And she asked a couple times if you were going to leave Beckett on her own Dad," she said to her father who walked up behind Beckett then.</p>
      <p>"You explained what a date was though," Castle said to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"I guess my explanation wasn't enough," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"She does now," Alexis said as she walked to the family room, Castle and Beckett following her. "I hope it's okay, she asked me point blank what that was. I told her it was when two people who liked each other spent time together basically."</p>
      <p>"That's fine, actually I said pretty much the same thing," Beckett said, nodding as she sat on the couch next to Castle. "But besides that?"</p>
      <p>"I think she had a lot of fun," Alexis said with a smile and held her bowl out to her father and Beckett from where she was sitting on an armchair next to the couch. "Your daughter is so adorable. I'd love to take her once to my dorm, my roommate and the others girls I know would love her."</p>
      <p>"That would be fun, but later on this year, let her get used to kindergarten first before you take her," Beckett said. "What?" she asked as she looked at Castle who was staring at her.</p>
      <p>"No, just, wasn't expecting that," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Oh, something else," Alexis said as Beckett rolled her eyes. "We watched some music videos. She said you were okay with her seeing them, but I wasn't sure."</p>
      <p>"Which ones?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"Two were George Harrison songs, and another of Paul's," Alexis replied.</p>
      <p>"<em>This Song</em> and <em>True Love</em>?" Beckett said. When Alexis nodded she smiled and said, "Those are okay, we've watched them together before."</p>
      <p>"I really was unsure when there were those two cross dressing men in the jury," Alexis said. "But I didn't want to stop it; she was enjoying it too much."</p>
      <p>"She loves that one… she and her mother watched it before…," Beckett said before trailing off. "<em>True Love</em> too, that one is a lot better."</p>
      <p>"It was funny, and Julia sang along with both of them," Alexis said. "She knows all the words."</p>
      <p>"When you're stuck inside your home, there's not much you can do but listen to music, and watch TV," Beckett said with a slight sigh. "What was the music video from Paul?"</p>
      <p>"<em>Your Loving Flame</em>," Alexis said quickly. "I liked that one actually, the song is really sweet."</p>
      <p>"You get that with Paul," Castle said. "And the rest of your night?"</p>
      <p>"A Derek Hough marathon," Alexis said, smiling widely. "And she showed me some of the dancing she did at the recital too, in between the dances. She's really good. Oh and something else she's good at; that I wasn't expecting; speaking Russian."</p>
      <p>"That came up?" Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"You're teaching her Russian?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I took her to a Russian market and she heard me speaking to the owners, and she asked to learn," Beckett said. "She's learned faster-" she started to say when she suddenly looked towards the doorway and saw her daughter standing there.</p>
      <p>"Mommy!" Julia cried, running out from the doorway and to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Julia, what are you doing up?" Beckett said, picking her up and putting her on her lap.</p>
      <p>"I heard you Mommy, I missed you," Julia said, hugging her tightly.</p>
      <p>"I missed you too, but you had a good time tonight didn't you?" Beckett asked embracing her daughter, kissing her on the forehead. She felt Julia nod and she smiled before saying, "I'm glad you did, but you should be in bed, it's late."</p>
      <p>"Don't wanna," Julia said, holding onto the pendant of Beckett's necklace tightly.</p>
      <p>"I'll let you sit with us for a little," Beckett said. "But then you need to sleep or you'll be too tired tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, snuggling against her mother as close as she could. "Did you have fun Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"I did," Beckett assured her.</p>
      <p>"I told Alexis about speaking Russia," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Russian," Beckett gently corrected. "I know, Alexis told me."</p>
      <p>"I did," Alexis said quickly. "I wanted to tell your mom she did a good job teaching you so far. You speak really well for your age."</p>
      <p>"<em>Spasibo</em>," Julia giggled before she yawned slightly. "Did I say that right Mommy?" she then asked worriedly.</p>
      <p>"You did, don't worry," Beckett laughed softly. "Want to go to bed now?" When her daughter shook her head she sighed and said, "Not yet huh?"</p>
      <p>"No, oh Mommy, we had ice cream for dessert, was sooo good," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"Which flavor did you get?" Beckett said. She was surprised when Julia looked at Alexis, and the two started to laugh. "Any idea what the joke is?" she asked Castle.</p>
      <p>"Good question," he replied. "You didn't get something huge for her did you?"</p>
      <p>"No," Alexis said with a smile when they stopped laughing. "Just an inside joke."</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said, looking at Julia who was rubbing her eyes. "Sweetie-"</p>
      <p>"No Mommy, not yet," Julia begged, looking up at her. "What do we do tomorrow?"</p>
      <p>"We're not sure," Castle answered for her. "I think that should be up to you Alexis."</p>
      <p>"Me? And Gram too right?" Alexis said in surprise. When her father nodded, she smiled and said, "Julia told me how good she's gotten at swimming, we could do that. Oh, and she told me about the Farmer's Market."</p>
      <p>"Is that going on during the week?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"During the summer months it does, while the tourists are here," Castle said. "So we could go to that and then head to the pool."</p>
      <p>"Sounds like a good idea," Beckett said. "And I can't wait for tomorrow Julia."</p>
      <p>"Why?" Julia asked sleepily.</p>
      <p>"You and I are going to have a girl's night in," Beckett said, kissing her forehead. "We'll order dinner and then watch movies, remember I asked which ones you want to see?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, trying to sound enthusiastic but too tired to put much effort into it. "<em>Yellow Submarine</em> and <em>Madagascar</em> and <em>Ice Age 2</em>."</p>
      <p>"That's right, and you know what," Beckett said, standing up as she put Julia against her hip. "The sooner you get to sleep the sooner we can get to tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"That's good," Julia sighed, resting her chin on her mother's shoulder.</p>
      <p>"You don't have to follow," Beckett said, turning to Castle and Alexis who were behind her.</p>
      <p>"I'd like to go to bed myself," Alexis said. "It's exhausting sometimes taking care of a kid, I don't know how you do it and with your job too."</p>
      <p>"It's not easy, but it's worth it, believe me," Beckett said before she headed up the stairs. Inside Julia's room, she put her daughter on the bed, not surprised she was fast asleep when she'd done so. She quickly covered her and then leaned down, kissing her forehead gently. "Sweetie, go to sleep," she said in dismay when she pulled back and saw Julia's eyes were open.</p>
      <p>"It's kind of funny," Alexis was saying as she and her father were standing in the doorway to her room. "At the ice cream shop the worker who helped us thought we were sisters."</p>
      <p>"Doesn't surprise me," Castle said. "You've both got red hair; even though not the same shade you could still be sisters. Did Julia hear that?"</p>
      <p>"She was worried that the woman was lying," Alexis said. "But I don't think she minded after I told her she wasn't."</p>
      <p>"Did she wake up?" Castle said, looking past his daughter and seeing Beckett coming out of Julia's room, closing the door behind her.</p>
      <p>"Right as I kissed her goodnight," Beckett said with a sigh as she walked over to them. "Apparently she had to tell me one more thing." She smiled when the two looked at her questioningly and said, "She wants to know the next time you can watch her Alexis."</p>
      <p>"She's incredibly sweet," Alexis said, smiling. "And if you want me to watch her again I'll be happy to."</p>
      <p>"You might be if Martha can't watch her after school," Beckett said. "Well, during that two week trial period we're having."</p>
      <p>"I get the feeling it'll be longer than that Kate," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"We'll see," Beckett said simply. "Thank you so much though Alexis, for taking care of her this first time."</p>
      <p>"You're welcome, and it was fun, I never thought I'd meet someone who's as big a fan of Derek as I am," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"I'm going to head to bed," Beckett said then. "Goodnight Alexis, see you tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"Night Beckett," Alexis called.</p>
      <p>Entering the room and closing the door behind her, Beckett sat down on the edge of the bed, thinking until she heard Castle come in.</p>
      <p>"You alright?" Castle asked as he walked around the bed to her.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I was just thinking about what we were talking about on the beach," Beckett said, standing up. "Have you really never told anyone what you found out?"</p>
      <p>"No," Castle said, taking her hand in his. "I almost didn't tell you. I was tempted, really tempted to either lie or deflect; even though you told me not to."</p>
      <p>"Why didn't you?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"I thought about it, and realized that I'd be insulting you either way. By lying I'd basically be saying I didn't trust you, which is untrue. And deflecting would be the same thing… sort of," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Thank you for not doing that," Beckett said. "I honestly didn't know if you were going to tell me." She wrapped her arms around him then as he embraced her at the same time and they hugged in silence before she sighed and said, "I'm sorry."</p>
      <p>"For what?" Castle asked in confusion.</p>
      <p>"For being so worried about Julia," Beckett said simply. "I really didn't want it to affect me during the date but-"</p>
      <p>"No, it didn't affect you," Castle said quickly, interrupting her. "If it had we would have come back a lot sooner. And you've only been a mother for three months, so it's natural you'd be worried about her."</p>
      <p>Sighing deeply, Beckett nodded slightly and said, "At least she was okay, I promise next time I won't be as worried, a little, but not as much."</p>
      <p>"I'd be shocked if you weren't," Castle said. He rubbed his hands up and down her back then and said, "Well despite everything I think it was a nice dinner." After Beckett murmured her agreement he then kissed her and said, pressing his forehead against hers, "And since we're home and we know your daughter and mine are okay, why don't we relax?"</p>
      <p>"And what do you mean exactly by relax?" Beckett said, a slight smile spreading across her face at his tone of voice.</p>
      <p>"I'll show you," Castle said, smiling back at her, taking her hand into his again.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"You want to know something?"</p>
      <p>"What?" Castle asked, running his hand lazily up and down Beckett's arm.</p>
      <p>"I know you said this was supposed to be relaxing, but I honestly don't think the definition of the word would apply to what we just did," Beckett said, looking up at him.</p>
      <p>"No, but still, you enjoyed it," Castle said. "Ow," he said with a slight laugh as she nudged him in the ribs hard with her elbow. "What?" he asked as the water in the tub splashed up against the sides as she shifted next to him, wrapping her arms around him.</p>
      <p>"You just assumed I liked it," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"You never told me to stop," Castle said defensively. He made a face when she smiled at him and said, "Fell for it again."</p>
      <p>"Next time don't put words into my mouth," Beckett said. "I don't care if you're a writer and that's what you do."</p>
      <p>"Honestly? It's better to let you talk, I can get some good stuff for Nikki Heat that way," Castle said.</p>
      <p>Beckett didn't reply to that, as she could sense, by the way he'd trailed off slightly that he was thinking about something. "A new idea?" she asked, lifting her head to look at him.</p>
      <p>"Sort of," Castle said. "Although I'm a little hesitant about it."</p>
      <p>"Really, since when are you hesitant," Beckett said before she sat up and stepped out of the tub, wrapping herself up in a towel.</p>
      <p>"It's something I've suggested before, but you always shoot it down," Castle said, scrambling to hurry out after her.</p>
      <p>"Oh, not that again Castle, please," Beckett lightly groaned.</p>
      <p>"Come on, it could be fun," Castle said, hurrying after her once he had a towel around his waist. "And when I say fun," he said once he was able to catch up to her and wrapped his arms around her from behind. "I also… mean… amazing," he said as he kissed her shoulders and up to her neck.</p>
      <p>Sighing, Beckett turned around and made him stop before he could start kissing her again. "I don't like the idea though; it makes me wonder who you're seeing yourself with, me or Nikki Heat."</p>
      <p>"With you Kate," Castle said, pretending to sound insulted. "It would be a little creepy imagining Nikki."</p>
      <p>Thinking for a moment, Beckett then said, "And are you going to be directing this the whole time?"</p>
      <p>"No, I just want to set it up and we'll go from there," Castle said. "And I promise I will not call you Nikki, I just want to test this out for a chapter I have in mind."</p>
      <p>Beckett let out another sigh and let him open the towel around her, not surprised when he slid his hands down her body slowly, from her shoulders to her breasts and then down to her abdomen before sliding them around to her back. "So," she said as he started to kiss her lips in short, quick pecks before going to her neck. "When you… write this… is it going… to be exactly the same?" she asked as he moved back to her lips as she tugged the towel on him off.</p>
      <p>"Not exactly," Castle said. "I have a hard time recreating this in my books."</p>
      <p>"Thank god," Beckett said before she kissed him as hard as she could, her arms wrapped around him tightly.</p>
      <p>"Here," Castle said when they pulled away, both of them gasping slightly. He helped her on the bed, and directed her to get on her knees, leaning over the headboard. "Too much?" he asked.</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said simply. She shivered when he kissed the back of her right shoulder before drifting over to do the same to the other. "I'm fine Castle," she said finally when he didn't do anything else.</p>
      <p>Straightening up when he heard the frustration in her voice, Castle quickly reached around her and placed his hands on her abdomen, helping her move slightly to allow him to enter her. He leaned over her and started to move, going slowly at first. But he could tell that it wasn't going to be good enough, and he thrust a little harder after feeling her moving with him. While they were busy moving together, trying to set a pace that satisfied them both, he used his right hand to reach around to her front, sliding his fingertips first over her abdomen.</p>
      <p>Gasping out a little at his touch, Beckett pushed herself upright and reached behind to wrap her arms around Castle, clutching at him tightly. His hand was still roaming her skin, and the feel of it sliding over her was enough to raise her flesh in its wake. She tensed up slightly when he carefully fondled her breasts, but relaxed against him quickly as the sensation was making her body almost melt. She tried to keep up with him, but she was a little jerky for a few of her thrusts. She felt him kissing the side of her head, and she quickly turned it, kissing him back as his mouth descended on hers.</p>
      <p>Castle's fingers reached up and brushed against Beckett's cheek before he moved down to her stomach, and gently grasped it, pulling her against him. He wasn't surprised when she gasped out and pulled away from him, looking at her intently as she pressed herself back into him harder than she already was. "Kate…" he murmured as he brushed the fingers of his left hand along her jaw before he turned her head so he could kiss her again.</p>
      <p>Kissing him back, trying to match his passion, Beckett grabbed his hand on her stomach and kept it there until they parted. She let Castle lean over her, forcing her onto the headboard again, and she tried her best to keep up with him as they started to lose control of themselves. She didn't care that they were, just wanting to feel him taking her as roughly as he was for as long as she could stand. She reached over with her hands to where his were gripping the edge of the headboard, and held them tightly. She could feel his lips all over her shoulders and back, and at one point he was pulling her hair aside carefully; a sharp contrast to the way he was moving; and he pressed his face against the nape of her neck. His rough breathing hit her skin, making it grow moist with the heat of it and she was trembling at the sensation as he kissed her a little wildly before pulling back from her.</p>
      <p>Running his hand down Beckett's back, Castle could feel the slight sheen of perspiration on her, and he bent his head down to her shoulder before kissing her. He shuddered once as he could taste the sweat of her skin on his lips, making him groan in pleasure. He moved up to her neck, pressing his face into it as best he could before he put his hand back on the headboard.</p>
      <p>It was a sort of pleasurable shock for them both when first Beckett and shortly after Castle lost control and they covered the sounds of their lovemaking with their short gasps and groans until they slumped against the headboard. They were quiet for a few minutes, trying to recover since it had taken a lot out of them.</p>
      <p>"It's a good thing," Beckett began before she breathed in deeply and Castle got off of her carefully. "Good thing those candles weren't here."</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Castle said simply, not trusting himself to say anything witty yet. He carefully moved away from Beckett, kissing her collarbone as he did so, and then helped her down on the bed before he lay down with her.</p>
      <p>"Enough research?" Beckett asked as she wrapped her arms around his neck.</p>
      <p>"Re- oh, that," Castle said, recovering enough to realize what she was talking about. "I don't know, I think I'd have a hard time writing that."</p>
      <p>"Was that just an excuse to try that out?" Beckett asked incredulously, sitting up.</p>
      <p>"What? No, it wasn't, I was serious, but I wasn't sure how it would work out," Castle said. "And I realized it's going to be really hard for me to write in good enough detail."</p>
      <p>"It better be," Beckett said, sliding down on the bed with an exasperated sigh. "Because you don't have to make up excuses like that."</p>
      <p>"I realize that," Castle said, turning onto his side. "But it was nice. You have to admit."</p>
      <p>"No saying I liked it already?" Beckett said as he stroked her cheek.</p>
      <p>"Oh, I know already you did, I just want to hear you say it," Castle said. He was a little taken aback when she kissed him firmly in response, but quickly responded before they pulled apart. "That's a yes I'm guessing."</p>
      <p>"Take that as you want," Beckett said, trying to be serious. But she couldn't help but smile and she cried out as he suddenly got on top of her, his fingers on rubbing her sides. She reached down as she burst out laughing, and was able to stop him from tickling her anymore.</p>
      <p>"Forgot you're a lot stronger than I am when I try and do that," Castle said as he watched her catch her breath. He leaned down then and kissed her neck, making her relax slightly.</p>
      <p>"Are you going to keep tickling me if I let you go?" Beckett asked, her voice lower in tone. When he shook his head she whispered, "Good," before wrapping her arms around him tightly, kissing him deeply when his lips crushed against hers.</p>
      <p>Kissing her passionately, Castle rolled them onto their sides, stroking her hair and back before they pulled away at the same time. "We can do two things at this point," he said as he carefully pushed her hair out of the way on her shoulders. "We can relax like I said we would do." There he paused and kissed her lips gently before sliding his lips down to the hollow of her throat. "Or…" he began.</p>
      <p>Beckett didn't bother to continue the line of conversation; she lay on her back, drawing Castle with her though he quickly followed. She cupped his cheeks in her hands, kissing him hard as they moved at the same time, and they were quickly coupled again. She pulled away with a sigh as he started to thrust, going a lot slower than they had so far that night. She moved with him rapidly, to let him know she was very much alright with that, and slid her hands back around his head, gently raking her nails over his scalp. She shook slightly as he turned his head and kissed her hard before moving back to press his forehead against hers.</p>
      <p>His breath mingling with hers, Castle let his hands switch between resting his weight above her and roaming over her body, whatever he could touch. He didn't really have a sense of time with that, as Beckett was kissing him every so often and he quickly moved to respond to each press of her lips. But he was brought back from the joy it was touching her and making love to her when he felt her tensing up before he lost control of himself. He kissed her hard as they both groaned into each other's mouths, and once they had calmed down enough, he pulled away, brushing his lips against hers before pressing his forehead to hers once again.</p>
      <p>Beckett moved with him as Castle turned onto his back, pressing against his side as closely as she could. She laid her cheek against his shoulder, feeling his hand run down her hair before grabbing her shoulder. "I'm going to miss this," she said, her voice sounding loud in the silent room; broken only by the waves outside.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, it's been great," Castle said. "But when we get back to the city it'll be different."</p>
      <p>"I know," Beckett said, raising her head slightly. "Julia trusts you more, so we don't have to walk on eggshells around her."</p>
      <p>"You ever worry she might tell someone about us?" Castle asked, voicing a concern he'd had for a while.</p>
      <p>"I've explained to her about us not being able to work together if our relationship is discovered," Beckett said slowly. "And I told her if anyone asked who you were to me and her, to just tell them that you're my friend."</p>
      <p>"Just a friend?" Castle asked as he grasped the small of her back.</p>
      <p>"A very, very close friend," Beckett said with an almost full smirk on her face as she leaned down to kiss him deeply. She felt Castle soon responding as he pressed her back hard to hold her firmly against him.</p>
      <p>They slowly began to caress each other before they worked up to making love again and once they had satisfied each other thoroughly they went to sleep, exhaustion beginning to set in. They held one another tightly, feeling with their talk on the beach their relationship had taken a deeper note with Castle confiding about his father to Beckett, bringing them far closer. They felt they were on more equal footing with that, and it made them wonder, as they were nodding off after a passionate kiss, what the next step would be for them together.</p>
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<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Only Our Hearts Will Know</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter comes from the song Only Our Hearts by Paul McCartney from his album Kisses On the Bottom.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>Peeking around the doorway, Julia looked all over the room, trying to find her mother. When she didn't see her, she went inside and was about to run over to the bed when Beckett stepped out from the bathroom.</p>
      <p>Quickly putting her finger to her lips, Beckett walked to her daughter and picked her up, closing the door behind her carefully so Castle wouldn't wake up. "Morning sweetie," she said, kissing Julia's forehead. "How come you're up so early?"</p>
      <p>"I wanna help you with breakfast Mommy," Julia said with a wide smile. "Can I?"</p>
      <p>"Yes, you know I always let you," Beckett said, going down the stairs. "What do you want to help me with?"</p>
      <p>"Are you gonna make pancakes?" Julia asked eagerly. When her mother nodded she said, "Can I help with that Mommy? Please?"</p>
      <p>"You can," Beckett said. "But I'll make that last," she said. "Until then, why don't you color here?" she said, setting Julia on one of the tall chairs at the island. She grabbed her daughter's coloring book and crayons and once she was set, walked over to the fridge to start getting food out.</p>
      <p>Watching her mother as she colored, Julia waited impatiently for her to finish with the eggs, bacon and sausage before she knew it was time to make pancakes. "I'm coming Mommy," she said eagerly as she started to push on the counter.</p>
      <p>"Julia!" Beckett said as she turned around and saw her daughter's chair nearly fall back if Castle hadn't run up and stopped it.</p>
      <p>"I was going to say good morning," Castle told her as she ran around to pick Julia up. "I guess I'll say that after I say, be careful with the chair Julia."</p>
      <p>"Sorry," Julia said, sounding a little ashamed. "I didn't know it did that Mommy."</p>
      <p>"Okay, well now you know, so be careful like he said," Beckett said, kissing her forehead. "Good morning," she said to him with a smile.</p>
      <p>"Morning," Castle replied, leaning over and sharing a kiss with her. "You weren't kidding about brunch."</p>
      <p>"No, I wanted the chance to make it anyways," Beckett said. "A sort of thanks for letting me and Julia come here."</p>
      <p>"You didn't have to, but you're welcome," Castle said as she handed him Julia.</p>
      <p>"Can I say thank you too?" Julia asked, tugging on Castle's shirt.</p>
      <p>"You can," he said. "You had fun right?"</p>
      <p>"A lot," Julia said, holding her arms out wide.</p>
      <p>"That much huh? I'm glad you did," Castle said, pretending to be serious.</p>
      <p>"Sweetie do you still want to help me?" Beckett asked as she was stirring something in a bowl.</p>
      <p>"Oh, I need to help Mommy make pancakes!" Julia told Castle worriedly.</p>
      <p>"Here, mind if I watch?" Castle asked as he took the little girl over to where her mother was standing.</p>
      <p>"That's fine," Beckett said absently, watching as Julia took over, stirring the batter for her. "You'll need to make the coffee though," she said, remembering as he leaned against the counter next to them.</p>
      <p>"You didn't get to it?" Castle asked, standing up at that.</p>
      <p>"Julia won't let me," Beckett said simply with a smile. "She insisted that you need to make it."</p>
      <p>"That's enough of an explanation for me," Castle said with a nod. He watched Beckett stand behind Julia; who was standing on a stool again; and helped her pour out the batter. "I am a little surprised actually," he said as he started getting everything ready for the coffee machine.</p>
      <p>"About what?" Beckett asked, turning to him.</p>
      <p>"That you made chocolate chip pancakes," Castle replied.</p>
      <p>"They're her favorite," Beckett replied, motioning to her daughter. "And again, a sort of thank you for you."</p>
      <p>"You know you can say thanks in other ways," Castle said a little suggestively, glancing at Julia to make sure she didn't understand what he was hinting at.</p>
      <p>"We can discuss that later," Beckett said simply yet with a firm undertone.</p>
      <p>"Great," Castle said as he watched Julia and Beckett flip one of the pancakes together. "But I'm still looking forward to tasting those."</p>
      <p>"We'll see how that coffee is before I let you," Beckett said with a slight smile as Castle glanced at her.</p>
      <p>"He can't taste the pancakes I help make?" Julia asked, looking up at her mother.</p>
      <p>"I'm just kidding sweetie," Beckett said, kissing her cheek. "And hurry, this one is going to burn," she said quickly before helping her flip one on the pan.</p>
      <p>"Are we still going out to the playground after breakfast?" Castle asked as he finished with Beckett's cup of coffee and walked over to her with it in hand.</p>
      <p>"That's the plan," Beckett said absently as she finished with the last pancake and helped Julia down. Before she could take the plate with the stack of pancakes, Castle took it out of her hands and handed her the cup. "You want to see?" she asked her daughter who was on tip toe, trying to look into it. When Julia said seriously, "Yes, please Mommy," she bent down enough for her to see the design on the foam that he had made for her, a swirl with lines of the darker coffee underneath showing through.</p>
      <p>"Ooh, it's perfect, like a painting," Julia cooed.</p>
      <p>"Thank you, I should make that a hobby," Castle said before Beckett kissed him on the lips quickly.</p>
      <p>"You should, you're pretty adept at it," Beckett said with a smile. When they had gone to the table and were sitting she asked, "You're not worried about your daughter?"</p>
      <p>"Not really, I get the feeling they might have come back a little late, so she stayed the night," Castle said, taking the plate of eggs from Beckett. "Are you?"</p>
      <p>"Worried about my daughter?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"No, mine," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Oh, no, Julia was asking me where she was while I was cooking," Beckett replied.</p>
      <p>"I think," Castle said then, standing up from the table as he heard a noise down the hall. "That she has just arrived." He walked over to the foyer and smiled as Alexis walked in. "Good morning, I'm assuming your ship just came in?" he asked as his daughter set her purse down on the stair railing.</p>
      <p>"It was really late, I didn't want to come in and scare anyone," Alexis said with a smile as she kissed her father's cheek. "I'm starving though, thank you so much for making breakfast," she told him as she walked to the kitchen.</p>
      <p>"My mommy made it," Julia said, jumping up on her knees on her chair as Alexis neared the table. "And I helped with pancakes!"</p>
      <p>"It looks really good," Alexis said. "Thanks," she said to Beckett who was handing her a plate.</p>
      <p>"How was the party?" Beckett asked, sitting back down and urging Julia to return to her food.</p>
      <p>"Pretty fun," Alexis replied. "Though Jeannie's friend almost fell off the side of the boat. Luckily some of the other guys; his friends; caught him before he could fall. They put him on the hammock on deck and he slept the rest of the trip."</p>
      <p>"A jump in the water would have sobered him up," Castle said, sitting back in his chair. "Though he probably would have just gone back to drinking."</p>
      <p>"Someone else did that," Alexis said before eating some eggs. "Another guy, Jeannie's dad got incredibly mad since we had to stop and get him. He made all the guys go below deck, embarrassed poor Jeannie. She kept apologizing, saying she shouldn't have invited the guys. But we tried to convince her it was fine. That's another reason why I stayed at her house, I wanted to make sure she knew I wasn't mad, Becky and Loretta did the same."</p>
      <p>"But you did have fun at least," Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Besides that, it was great," Alexis said. "A beautiful night out at sea."</p>
      <p>"Could you see lots of stars?" Julia asked eagerly, leaning over with her arms on the table.</p>
      <p>"A lot," Alexis said, smiling as Julia giggled. "And Julia? These pancakes are great."</p>
      <p>"Mommy made them more," Julia said with a smile. "She makes the best."</p>
      <p>Alexis glanced at her father and then smiled at him as she said, "One of the best."</p>
      <p>"I think she forgot about yours the other day Castle," Beckett said with a smile as he nodded. "But they're good too." She then glanced down the hall and called, "Good morning Martha."</p>
      <p>"Morning Mother," Castle said as she walked over to the table.</p>
      <p>"Good morning everyone, I see I'm late to the meal," Martha said as she sat at the other end of the table.</p>
      <p>"I was late too Gram," Alexis said. "Spent the night at Jeannie's."</p>
      <p>"And how was the party?" Martha asked.</p>
      <p>While Alexis was telling Martha about the party, Castle leaned over and asked Beckett, "Are we heading to the beach or playground first?"</p>
      <p>"I'll let Julia decide," Beckett replied. "But it'll likely be the playground. Are you going to join us?"</p>
      <p>"Sure, I don't really have anything else to do, might as well go with you," Castle said with a shrug.</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia said, tugging her mother's shirt. "Are we gonna go now?"</p>
      <p>"Not yet," Beckett said. "You need to finish eating and get dressed before we go. But you have to tell us do you want to go to the beach now or after the playground?"</p>
      <p>"Playground now Mommy," Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Then finish up your breakfast and we'll go," Beckett urged her. "But slowly," she said quickly when Julia picked up a large piece of eggs. She kept an eye on her daughter until she finished eating, and took her upstairs to get her dressed as Castle and Alexis took care of the plates. "Okay, so what do you want to wear today?" she asked her daughter as she looked through the shirts that were in Julia's suitcase.</p>
      <p>Julia quickly picked out her clothes, and squirmed a little impatiently as her mother got her dressed. She sighed as Beckett had her sit on the bed while she did her hair and she kept wriggling back and forth.</p>
      <p>"Easy sweetie," Beckett said a little admonishingly. "I know you want to go, but the playground isn't going anywhere."</p>
      <p>"But what if Alexis leaves before?" Julia asked, turning her head before her mother made her look forward again.</p>
      <p>"She won't," Beckett said with a slight laugh. "Okay, you're ready. Just remember you need to put on your shoes downstairs."</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, grabbing Beckett's hand before they went down the stairs. "You didn't leave!" she said happily as she saw Alexis and Castle were in the foyer.</p>
      <p>"Of course not," Alexis said, laughing as Julia hopped to her before throwing her arms around her. "Did you think I was going to the playground without you?"</p>
      <p>"Uh-huh," Julia said, nodding her head as Beckett put her shoes on for her.</p>
      <p>"I wouldn't, I want to show you this playground anyways, it's really neat," Alexis said. "Are you ready?"</p>
      <p>Julia opened her mouth to speak before she paused and then looked up at her mother.</p>
      <p>"Yes! Go Julia, we can leave now," Beckett said with a laugh. "Your mom?" she asked Castle as Alexis and Julia stepped outside.</p>
      <p>"She's staying in," Castle replied, holding his arm out to her.</p>
      <p>"Oh, goodbye Martha," Beckett called out.</p>
      <p>"Goodbye, have fun," Martha replied.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, Castle, are you gonna come too?" Julia asked, pressing her face up against the screen door.</p>
      <p>"Right now sweetie," Beckett said, laughing as she put her arm through Castle's and they stepped out after Julia had run to where Alexis was waiting down the driveway. She was quiet as they started walking, but when they had reached the playground she said, "Hard to believe we're finished with vacation."</p>
      <p>"I know," Castle said. "Seemed to go by really, really quickly."</p>
      <p>"I get the feeling Julia's going to try and delay us tomorrow when we leave," Beckett commented.</p>
      <p>"Is that because she doesn't want to leave or she doesn't want to go to school… or both," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Both," Beckett said with a sigh. "I'm dreading how she's going to be Monday when I drop her off."</p>
      <p>"Mind if I go with you?" Castle asked as they stood on the curb to the playground as Julia ran to the slides with Alexis following her.</p>
      <p>"No, I was going to ask," Beckett said. "I figure if you're there it might make her a little more comfortable. Plus you'd know what to say to calm her down if she gets a little worried."</p>
      <p>"And you wouldn't?" Castle asked. "Wait, what's the real reason you're okay with me going?" he said, realizing there was something she wasn't saying.</p>
      <p>"Would you believe me if I told you she asked if you were going to come with us?" Beckett asked, not looking at him.</p>
      <p>"I would," Castle said. "She must think I'm always going to be hanging around her mother, so it would stand to reason I'd be going with you to her school."</p>
      <p>"What if I said she begged me to let you come with us before I answered her first question," Beckett said, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye.</p>
      <p>"That I'm having a hard time believing. But I know you wouldn't lie about your daughter like that," Castle said, surprised. "She wants me to go?"</p>
      <p>"I think it makes her feel safer," Beckett said. "Remember I told her about how you've saved my life before."</p>
      <p>"And I did tell her that she was important to me too," Castle said. "I'm happy to go though, she'll need as much support she can get, her first day at school… ever." He looked at Beckett; who was watching her daughter climbing onto the back of what was supposed to be a large turtle with rock climbing grips on it; and touched her back gently saying, "You're apprehensive still?"</p>
      <p>"I think I'll always be until I'm one hundred percent sure that she feels safe in school," Beckett said. "And that she gets used to it in general. I'm wondering now if I should have held her back for another year in preschool. She's not going to turn five until March."</p>
      <p>"Didn't you say they told you she's ready for kindergarten though?" Castle asked. "With her home schooling?"</p>
      <p>"They did, but I just worry about throwing her into school with most of the kids in her class older than her," Beckett said. She sighed and said, "But we'll see how she does."</p>
      <p>"Mommy!" Julia called as she got to a bridge on the jungle gym.</p>
      <p>"I'm coming," Beckett called back before she stepped down. "Need a break?" she asked with a smile at Alexis as she walked up to her.</p>
      <p>"I'm good, but I think she wants her mother for this," Alexis said. "I can't get her to cross."</p>
      <p>"Sweetie, are you scared?" Beckett asked, looking up at her daughter.</p>
      <p>"It shakes Mommy," Julia said, holding onto the railing.</p>
      <p>"I know, but that makes it a lot more fun," Beckett said. "Go ahead and cross, just go really slowly."</p>
      <p>"Will you stay there?" Julia asked. When her mother nodded, she walked across the bridge, clinging to the railing as tightly as she could before she reached the other side. "Mommy, I made it!" she said happily.</p>
      <p>"I see, you did a great job," Beckett said. "Now what are you going to do."</p>
      <p>"Can I go on the slide?" Julia asked, pointing to the steps that lead up to the tallest of the four slides.</p>
      <p>"You can, are you okay going by yourself?" Beckett asked. "Then go ahead," she said as Julia nodded eagerly. "I might have to go up," she said as an aside to Alexis and Castle who were next to her.</p>
      <p>To the surprise of her mother, Julia hurried up the stairs to the top of the slide and called down, "Catch me Mommy!" before she sat and pushed herself down. Squealing on the entire trip down, she jumped into Beckett's arms and cried, "Did you see me Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"I did, that was pretty amazing," Beckett said, lifting her up and kissing her quickly. "Want to do it again?"</p>
      <p>"No, I wanna go on the bars," Julia said, kicking her legs. After Beckett had set her down she took her hand and ran over to the monkey bars. She climbed up with her mother's help, and then tried to reach to the next one, but was unable to make it. "Help me?" she asked.</p>
      <p>"Here, I can get you across," Castle said as he grabbed her, waiting for her to flinch. But when she immediately reached across to the next bar he helped her go to the other end where he was about to set her down when she held onto him.</p>
      <p>"Again, please?" Julia asked, giggling slightly.</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled widely as she watched Castle helping Julia across again, relieved that the two weeks seemed to be enough to get her daughter trusting him. She walked over to them then and said, "I think that's enough for now sweetie, your arms are going to get tired."</p>
      <p>Once Castle had put her down, Julia ran over to Alexis and said excitedly, "Can we go on the swings?"</p>
      <p>"I wasn't expecting her to accept me helping her across," Castle commented as he joined Beckett walking after their daughters.</p>
      <p>"I know, but again, you've earned her trust," Beckett said as she watched Alexis helping Julia onto a swing before she started to push her carefully.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I'm really glad if I haven't mentioned that before," Castle said as they watched Julia kicking her legs as Alexis tried to tell her how she could swing on her own.</p>
      <p>"I think she's a little too young for that still," Beckett said with a laugh.</p>
      <p>"Watch how I swing," Alexis said, stopping Julia's swing. She picked up the little girl and then set her on her lap once she herself was sitting on it. She pushed herself and said, as Julia held onto the chains under her hands, "See how I move my legs?"</p>
      <p>"Your legs are longer; don't I need them that tall too?" Julia asked as Alexis stopped and Beckett picked her up.</p>
      <p>"Not necessarily," Alexis said, smiling as Beckett put her daughter in the swing next to her.</p>
      <p>Julia tried to mimic the way Alexis had been pushing back and forth with her legs, but it wasn't enough to move her very much. She felt a hand on her back and looked up at her mother saying, "I can't do it."</p>
      <p>"I know, it's okay, you can practice more as you get taller," Beckett said, leaning down and kissing her forehead. "Want me to push you now?"</p>
      <p>"No," Julia said, shaking her head emphatically. "Wanna be down Mommy." When Beckett had picked her up, she then said, a little demandingly, "I wanna swing with you like I did with Alexis."</p>
      <p>"Right away sweetie," Beckett said, pretending to be serious. She sat in the swing then with her daughter on her lap and was about to push herself back when someone grabbed the chains. "You know my legs are long enough," she said as she let Castle push her foreword and Julia squealed slightly in joy.</p>
      <p>"I'm aware of that, but I thought you might appreciate a little help," Castle replied as he watched Alexis swinging next to them. "Or Julia would anyways."</p>
      <p>"I think she does," Beckett said, putting her hands around her daughter's on the chains. She smiled as the little girl kept on squealing as they swung out and she let them go back and forth for a few more times before she dragged her feet in the wood chips to slow them down.</p>
      <p>Once she had been set down, Julia ran over to Castle and grabbed his hand saying, "Thank you! That was fun!"</p>
      <p>"Glad I could help," Castle said as he squeezed her much smaller hand. "Now what do you want to do?"</p>
      <p>"Can I go on the bars again?" Julia asked, jumping up and down. "My arms aren't tired anymore."</p>
      <p>Beckett nodded when Castle glanced at her questioningly, and she smiled as they went back to the monkey bars, Alexis following. She went over to them as Julia went across with Castle holding her, and Alexis went across after her, pretending to catch up to the little girl. She was incredibly happy to see her daughter laughing and smiling so easily, unable to help comparing her to how she had been only months before.</p>
      <p>"Mommy, can you really do that?" Julia said suddenly, cutting into Beckett's thoughts.</p>
      <p>"Do what?" Beckett asked.</p>
      <p>"I mentioned something about your training at the police academy," Castle said. "And I might have said you could go across these since you had to do it there."</p>
      <p>"I can, but I think I'll pass here," Beckett said, shooting him a mock glare. "Come on sweetie, I'll take you on the slide okay?"</p>
      <p>"I'll race you to the slide Julia," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Come on Mommy!" Julia cried as she grabbed her mother's hand. She took off running, Beckett having to race after her. She giggled as they were able to reach the slide just before Alexis did, and she climbed up with her mother to the top before sliding down on her lap. "Again!" she begged as they waited for Alexis to slide down.</p>
      <p>Beckett followed her daughter to the top of the slide again and when they came down she said to Castle; who was standing at the end, "Do me a favor?"</p>
      <p>"What?" he asked in slight confusion.</p>
      <p>"Join us," Beckett said, smiling.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, come on Dad, how long has it been since you played on a playground?" Alexis said teasingly as she got off the end of the slide.</p>
      <p>"A long time, you were a lot shorter than this," Castle said. He was a little surprised when Julia took his hand and dragged him over to the steps onto the jungle gym. "Where are we going?" he asked with a laugh as Beckett and his daughter followed them across the bridge.</p>
      <p>"I wanna go here again," Julia said eagerly before she climbed up the steps to the tallest slide.</p>
      <p>"Wait," Beckett said, turning around and hurrying down the steps until she was at the bottom of the slide. "Go ahead sweetie," she called up to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Will you go here too?" Julia asked Castle and Alexis.</p>
      <p>"I think we're a little too big, we might get stuck," Alexis said. "But we'll see who gets to the end first, us or you. Ready?" When Julia nodded she then told her, "Then ready, set, go!" She turned and ran to the end of the slide as the little girl went down on it, and once she reached Beckett, who was picking up her daughter said, "Looks like you're the fastest."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, where did Castle go?" Julia said, peering behind her.</p>
      <p>"I'm almost there," Castle called from the top of the steps. He smiled at Beckett when Julia ran over to him and grabbed his hand, tugging on it until he was down on the ground. He let her pull him over to the small merry-go-round made of metal, and asked, "You want me to push you?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, me and Alexis," Julia said, holding onto one of the metal bars.</p>
      <p>"Not too fast Dad," Alexis said warningly as she got on next to Julia, sitting down.</p>
      <p>"Please, I don't need my daughter to get sick," Beckett said, standing next to him.</p>
      <p>"Right, if you want to be boring…" Castle said teasingly before Beckett playfully punched him in the arm. "Okay, okay, slowly," he said in mock exasperation.</p>
      <p>Watching Julia as Castle started to turn to merry-go-round, Beckett smiled widely as her daughter squealed in joy before waving at her. She waved back when Castle turned to her. "What?" she asked.</p>
      <p>"Want to join them?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I'll pass, I always managed to get sick on these," Beckett said wryly as he turned it again.</p>
      <p>"Me too, funny," Castle said. He smiled back at Beckett as she squeezed his arm and he took her hand, briefly squeezing it before he let her go, turning his attention back to Julia and Alexis.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia asked, opening her eyes slowly.</p>
      <p>"She's on the beach Julia," Martha said, walking over to where the little girl was sleeping on the couch in the living room.</p>
      <p>"Can I see her?" Julia said, rubbing her eyes and yawning.</p>
      <p>"Are you sure you had a long enough nap?" Martha asked. When Julia nodded eagerly, she helped her down and walked with her outside to the beach.</p>
      <p>"Oh, you're awake," Beckett said with a smile as she was walking up the sand. "Have a nice nap?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can I swim more now?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Right now," Beckett assured her. "Thank you for keeping an eye on her Martha," she said.</p>
      <p>"It was my pleasure darling, have fun in the water Julia," Martha replied, sitting down in one of the white chairs with a glass of wine in her hand.</p>
      <p>Julia waved at Martha before she skipped next to her mother on the sand and said, "Did you go swimming without me?"</p>
      <p>"She did," Castle said as he stood up seeing them coming close. "But that's because I asked her to. Sorry."</p>
      <p>"It's okay!" Julia said quickly. "Where is Alexis?" she asked, looking around the blanket and towels on the sand.</p>
      <p>"Already in the water," Beckett said with a smile. "I'll take you to her sweetie, just let me- Julia!" she said as her daughter started running down to the water. She was able to catch up with her in time, before she got too close to the breaking waves, and said, "Julia, you know you're not supposed to do that," a little sternly. "You still don't know how to swim." She sighed slightly when Julia suddenly started to cry and said, "Maybe that nap wasn't long enough," as she went to the blanket and sat down with Castle. "Do you want to go up to your room?" she asked the little girl gently, kissing her on the forehead.</p>
      <p>"No," Julia said, trying to stop crying so she could talk. "I'm sorry Mommy, very sorry."</p>
      <p>"Okay, well you know you're not supposed to do that," Beckett said. "So now that you know Alexis is in the water, what should you do next?"</p>
      <p>"P-Put on my vest?" Julia said in a near whisper.</p>
      <p>"That's right, why don't you grab it for me?" Beckett said. When Julia nodded she smiled at her daughter and kissed her before she let her go.</p>
      <p>"Here, why don't I help you?" Castle said as Julia passed him with the vest in hand. "Give your mom a break from doing that."</p>
      <p>Julia nodded and slipped her arms through the vest before Castle quickly buckled it. "I didn't mean to run," she said after whispering a thank you to him.</p>
      <p>"Don't worry," Castle reassured her as he stood up and took her hand. "I don't blame you for wanting to get down to the water right away, but you need to be careful. Your mom would have gotten really worried if you tried to swim without that vest."</p>
      <p>Glancing down at it, Julia looked up at Beckett and said, "Would you be Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"I would, you're my little girl Julia," she replied with a smile. "And I really don't want anything to happen to you. Are you ready to go in now?"</p>
      <p>"Can I?" Julia asked. She cried out in surprised exhilaration as Beckett and Castle swung her in between them as they walked down to the water. She giggled happily, as she guessed that her mother wasn't mad at her. She splashed through the water before they let her go and she swam the best she could until she reached Alexis.</p>
      <p>"I saw you on the beach," Alexis told the little girl. "How was your nap?"</p>
      <p>"Good, did you stay here all the time?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Almost," Alexis said with a smile. "Wait, here comes a wave," she said quickly before she held her breath and she could hear Julia gasping for air next to her before it overtook them. "Okay?" she asked quickly when they had resurfaced.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, did you see any dolphins while I was sleeping?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"Still no," Alexis said, trying not to laugh since the little girl had kept asking her that since they'd first gone to the beach after lunch. "Come on, let's go back."</p>
      <p>"Oh but I wanna stay," Julia whined slightly.</p>
      <p>"Julia, come on," Beckett called to her daughter since she wasn't too far and could hear their conversation. She waited for Julia to reach her before they went back to the shore and she watched the little girl sit on the sand, running her fingers through it before a wave washed over her.</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said. "I get to go with you tonight right?"</p>
      <p>"You remember what I told you," Beckett said as she picked her up and carried her to the drier sand at the edge of the breaking waves. "We're all going to dinner tonight."</p>
      <p>"Is it the same place you went with Castle?" Julia asked, making a mound in the sand.</p>
      <p>"No, it's here in town," Castle said as Beckett looked over at him questioningly.</p>
      <p>"It's really nice," Alexis said from her towel where she was sitting, watching as her father helped Julia make the mound of sand into a sandcastle. "Mediterranean and French."</p>
      <p>"Like we had?" Julia asked her interestedly.</p>
      <p>"Kind of," Alexis said. "You'll like it; their gyros are the best, in my opinion anyways."</p>
      <p>"I'll be interested to see this place," Beckett said, turning to Castle. "You're sure they allow kids?"</p>
      <p>"They do, I made sure," Castle assured her. "I just hope she'll be alright going to a place as upscale as this one is."</p>
      <p>"I thought, the day before we left, that you might have us go somewhere like that, so I packed the best dress she has," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"I get to wear it tonight?" Julia asked eagerly. When her mother nodded she squealed in joy and told Alexis seriously, "It's very pretty."</p>
      <p>"Oh, yeah, what does it look like?" Alexis asked.</p>
      <p>"It's a surprise," Julia giggled. "Right Mommy."</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said with a shrug before she smiled at Castle who looked confused.</p>
      <p>Julia ran to grab some seashells to decorate the sandcastle once it was finished, and she begged her mother to let her go into the water one more time after completing it.</p>
      <p>"I'll take her," Castle said as Beckett started to stand up. He took Julia's hand and they walked down to the water until she was up to her knees since she didn't have her vest on. "So did you like your visit here?" he asked her as she jumped over a wave.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, Mommy is a lot happier than at home," Julia said with a smile. "Me too, I am not afraid here. It's too pretty to be scared."</p>
      <p>"I'm glad to hear that," Castle said. "I'll have to bring you guys back."</p>
      <p>"Oh please?" Julia asked eagerly. When Castle nodded she clapped her hands together a few times before wrapping her arms around tightly saying exuberantly, "Thank you!"</p>
      <p>"For what?" Beckett said, making them turn to look at her.</p>
      <p>"I told her, since she loves it so much here, you two can visit again in the future," Castle said as Julia bounded to her mother and took her hands.</p>
      <p>"Say we can come back Mommy, please!" the little girl begged.</p>
      <p>"If Castle asks us, then yes," Beckett assured her.</p>
      <p>"You know if you ever wanted to come up here on your own with Julia, or with your dad too I wouldn't mind letting you," Castle then said.</p>
      <p>"I'll keep that in mind," Beckett said. "Come on, you need a bath before you can put on that dress sweetie and I still have to get ready after you're finished."</p>
      <p>"Aw, but Mommy, I don't need one again," Julia complained as Beckett led her out of the water and to the blanket.</p>
      <p>"You do, I don't want to put you in your dress while you're covered in salt from the water," Beckett said, drying her daughter off.</p>
      <p>"I can go to the shower over there," Julia said, motioning to the pool.</p>
      <p>"A bath sweetie," Beckett said firmly before she took Julia into her arms. She put her towel around her shoulders as her daughter sat on her lap and she glanced at Castle. "We can stay here a little longer though."</p>
      <p>"Good," Julia said. "Mommy, can we come back tomorrow?" she then asked after they were all quiet for a moment.</p>
      <p>"I don't think we'll have the time," Beckett said, rubbing her back. "We're probably going to leave early."</p>
      <p>"But why, do we have to do something?" Julia protested.</p>
      <p>"I need to make sure everything is ready for your school on Monday," Beckett told her gently. "And I'm going to make dinner too; your grandpapa is coming over to see us remember."</p>
      <p>"He's coming back from DC?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"Tonight," Beckett said. "He wants to see Julia before her first day of school."</p>
      <p>"Why isn't he going with her Monday morning?" Castle then said.</p>
      <p>"He has to head into work incredibly early," Beckett said. "He has a trial later on in the morning, so he needs to get to his office to get some paperwork ready. But," she then said looking at her daughter, "He'll take you to school with me on Tuesday."</p>
      <p>"He will?" Julia asked, looking eager. When Beckett nodded she then said, "Can I show him my room?"</p>
      <p>"You can," Beckett said. "I'm sure he'll love to see it." She kissed her daughter's head and felt her moving around to look at her. "Yes?" she asked before she could speak.</p>
      <p>"Can Castle and Alexis come over for dinner tomorrow?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"I think we should let them have dinner with Martha," Beckett said gently. "You know Alexis is moving back into college tomorrow after she gets back to the city, and I want us to have dinner with just your grandpapa."</p>
      <p>"Don't worry Julia," Alexis said, sitting up from where she had been laying in the sun. "Another night I'm sure we'll have dinner together. Remember my gram is taking care of you, and I'll come over sometimes too. So I bet one night when your mom picks you up we'll have dinner together like we will tonight."</p>
      <p>Julia nodded, and then looked up at her mother asking, "Why can't we stay here Mommy? Forever."</p>
      <p>"Because you have to go to school," Beckett answered with a smile as she started to rub Julia's hair with her towel. "And I do have to go to work." She shared a smile with Castle as her daughter slumped against her and said, "I know you're scared about school, but you know Celia might be in your class."</p>
      <p>"I hope so," Julia sighed deeply. "Can't you go with me to school the first day Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"I'll take you," Beckett said. "And remember Castle will come with us too. But I can't stay."</p>
      <p>"It's okay to be nervous the first day of school," Alexis commented, leaning over and looking at the little girl. "I always am."</p>
      <p>"Now when you're grown up too?" Julia asked in surprise.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, but once you start making friends, you'll like going I bet," Alexis said. "And don't you have your ballet after school?"</p>
      <p>Nodding, Julia wrapped her arms around her mother and then said, "I like that class."</p>
      <p>"I know, but you'll like your kindergarten class," Beckett assured her. "Okay, let's go sweetie, get you ready for dinner." She got up as Castle and Alexis did as well, and they quickly got everything they'd brought out to the sand with them, Julia helping as well. She led her daughter; once they were inside the house; up to her room, and quickly gave her a bath before she got her dressed.</p>
      <p>"Can I have my hair like yesterday?" Julia asked as Beckett sat down on the edge of the bed behind her to brush her hair.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Beckett said. "Tonight sweetie, you need to be on your best behavior. Remember the first restaurant we went to with your grandpapa?"</p>
      <p>"Is it like that?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"It is, but I know you can be a very good girl so I'm not worried," Beckett said. She quickly braided Julia's hair into a tight French braid and secured it at the bottom before saying, "There you go Julia. I need to get ready myself, what do you want to do?"</p>
      <p>"I can watch her for you," a voice said at the door. "Oh you look so cute Julia," Alexis said with a smile as the little girl jumped off the bed with her mother's help.</p>
      <p>"Is it a surprise?" Julia asked with a giggle as Alexis spun her around slowly. She looked down at her dress as the skirt belled out around her, a deep green that matched her eyes, with a wide white sash that tied into a large bow on the back.</p>
      <p>"It is, your dad bought this?" Alexis asked as she walked out of the room and Beckett followed them.</p>
      <p>"He did," Beckett said. "I was pretty shocked myself, but the green made him buy it."</p>
      <p>"Grandpapa said it was the same color as my eyes," Julia giggled.</p>
      <p>"It's very pretty," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Okay sweetie, I'll come down once I'm ready. Please try not to get your dress dirty and listen to Alexis," Beckett said. "You mind helping her with her shoes?" she asked the young woman.</p>
      <p>"Not a problem, I need to get mine too," Alexis said with a smile. "Come on Julia."</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled as she watched her daughter walk down the stairs with Alexis, chattering happily about her ballet class. She nearly jumped then when she felt a hand slide across her back and glanced at Castle. "I'll try not to take too long," she said with a smile as she smoothed down his lapels before doing the same to his tie.</p>
      <p>"That's alright, I know how it can be giving a little girl a bath," Castle commented, taking her hand. "Especially when they don't want to. Definitely don't miss that part of it."</p>
      <p>"I'll be down as soon as I'm ready," Beckett said with a laugh before she slipped her hand out of his grasp.</p>
      <p>Castle watched her walk down the hall, and then shook his head when he heard Julia's laughter coming from downstairs. He went down to the foyer, where Alexis was trying to put Julia's shoe on. "Having some trouble?" he asked as Julia moved her foot before her shoe got too close.</p>
      <p>"Maybe you'll have more luck," Alexis said, standing up.</p>
      <p>"Do you want your mom to put your shoes on?" Castle asked, taking the shoe that his daughter handed him.</p>
      <p>"No, you can," Julia said before she giggled.</p>
      <p>"Ready?" Castle asked Alexis.</p>
      <p>"Oh, sure," Alexis said, a little confused until she realized he had something in mind. She quickly figured it out when Julia hid her legs underneath the skirt of her dress, and she sat next to her on the stair, grabbing the little girl's foot and tickling it until she relaxed. "Hurry!" she said with a laugh as Julia laughed hard.</p>
      <p>"Okay, other foot," Castle said once he'd gotten the shiny Mary Jane shoe on Julia's foot. He waited for Alexis to tickle her again and he quickly put the other one on her.</p>
      <p>"That brings back a lot of memories," Martha said, coming down the stairs then.</p>
      <p>"I know, but I don't think Alexis protested as much," Castle said, standing and helping Julia up as well.</p>
      <p>"You look so adorable Julia," Martha said, cupping the little girl's chin.</p>
      <p>"Do you like it?" Julia asked happily, her cheeks still lightly flushed from laughter.</p>
      <p>"I do, it's the perfect color," Martha said as Julia spun around carefully. "Your mother has a good eye."</p>
      <p>"Actually my dad bought it for her," Beckett said, coming down the stairs herself. She smiled at Castle as his eyes went wide slightly for a moment, before she continued down. "Thank you for watching her," she told Alexis.</p>
      <p>"It was fun, though I had to enlist Dad's help to get her shoes on," she replied with a smile.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I was teasing them Mommy," Julia said, pressing her cheek against her mother's side as she wrapped her arms around her.</p>
      <p>"Not for too long I hope," Beckett said as she took Julia's hand and gently pulled her off of her. "Should we get going?" she asked Castle as his mother and Alexis were getting their purses.</p>
      <p>"Sure, why not?" Castle said, shaking himself. He followed Beckett and Julia out to his car where he put the little girl into her car seat and after getting out of the car he held Beckett's arm to keep her from going to the passenger seat.</p>
      <p>"What?" Beckett asked in slight surprise as Castle just stared. When he looked down at her she smiled and said, "It's not really that different from what I wore Wednesday night."</p>
      <p>"I'm just admiring your choice," Castle said as he opened the door for her. "You look amazing."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said, smiling at Julia who was watching them. "We better go; Alexis and Martha are going to get there before us."</p>
      <p>"Right," Castle said, seeing Alexis and his mother leaving in their car. He closed the door behind Beckett once she was sitting, and hurried around to the other side. "Still tired Julia?" he asked as he'd seen her yawning widely.</p>
      <p>"No, I wanna go," Julia said happily.</p>
      <p>"We are sweetie, right now," Beckett said, looking back at her. "You're not too hot are you?"</p>
      <p>"Why does she have her sweater on already?" Castle asked, looking in the mirror once he'd caught up to the other car.</p>
      <p>"She's always cold," Beckett said with a smile as Julia held her sweater protectively to her.</p>
      <p>"Are we going to the water?" Julia asked when the car fell silent.</p>
      <p>"We are," Castle said. "Right on the water again, but this place is further, right on the border to Southampton."</p>
      <p>Since the Hamptons was a small town, they were soon arriving at the restaurant, which Beckett saw was called <em>The Riviera</em>. "Interesting name," she commented as Castle opened the door for her.</p>
      <p>"Alexis wasn't kidding, this place is really good," Castle said. "Only problem is we might have to wait."</p>
      <p>"You should have told me before we left the house, what if she starts getting hyper?" Beckett said in slight exasperation.</p>
      <p>"I've got some games on my phone," Castle said as he went to the back of the car and helped Julia out of her car seat.</p>
      <p>"Don't run…" Beckett started to say after she'd helped Julia out and the little girl took off. She trailed off when her daughter grabbed Alexis' hand and she looked at Castle who held out his arm to her.</p>
      <p>Inside the restaurant which was decorated like a Greek home, white walls and blue beams and doors, Castle checked on their table and went back to where the others were standing. "There's still a party there," he said. "But they're finishing up so it shouldn't be more than twenty minutes. Why don't we go to the waiting area outside and I'll get us all some drinks?"</p>
      <p>"Mommy," Julia said after they were sitting on benches around a fire pit outside. "I'm hungry."</p>
      <p>"I know, but we need to wait to get our table," Beckett said, rubbing her back. "Castle's going to bring your drink right now though, okay?"</p>
      <p>Julia nodded, and then hurried over to the railing at the edge of the sitting area, looking out at the ocean which the restaurant was on. "It's really pretty," she said to Alexis who walked over to her.</p>
      <p>"I know, I love coming to restaurants here, they have the best views of the water," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Alexis, Julia," Castle called as he came outside with a waiter who had a tray of drinks. "Your drinks are here."</p>
      <p>"Ooh, I'm thirsty too now," Julia said, taking Alexis' hand before they hurried back to the others.</p>
      <p>"Here, drink slowly sweetie," Beckett said warningly as she held the girl's glass of pineapple juice for her. She watched her carefully as she sipped, and gently smoothed down some of the errant strands of hair on the side of her head. "Why don't you look at the water again?" she asked when Julia spun around then and she had to grab her to keep her from running into the fire pit.</p>
      <p>"Now is probably a good time for some games," Castle said, setting down his glass of wine. He took out his phone, and looked up at Julia in surprise when she ran over to him, trying to climb on his lap. He picked her up and set her there, glancing at Beckett.</p>
      <p>Smiling as she watched Castle put his arms around her daughter, Beckett was pleased when Julia didn't flinch or tense up. She remembered suddenly what he'd said to her two weeks before when they'd been walking on the beach in front of his house.</p>
      <p>"Are you okay Mommy?" Julia said, shaking her arm then.</p>
      <p>"Yes, what's wrong sweetie?" Beckett asked, looking over at her daughter.</p>
      <p>"I said what game do I play?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Let me see what you have here," Beckett said, taking the phone. She chose a memory game, and handed it back to her daughter saying, "Let Castle help you."</p>
      <p>"Will you?" Julia asked, peering up at him.</p>
      <p>"Sure," Castle replied.</p>
      <p>Beckett looked on as the two played the game, smiling when Julia would clap her hands together when they found a match. She was a little startled when the hostess called Castle's name, and she hurried to pick Julia up before she followed Martha and Alexis to the other side of the outdoor seating of the restaurant where their table was, directly against the railing. "I can see why the party before us didn't want to leave," she commented as she waited for a booster seat for her daughter to be brought.</p>
      <p>"Mr. Castle," a man said, walking up to the table. "It's good to see you again. I'm hoping the wait didn't inconvenience you."</p>
      <p>"It's alright Federico," Castle said as he shook the man's hand. "We didn't mind the wait. You remember my mother and daughter. This is Kate Beckett and her daughter Julia; they're our guests here tonight."</p>
      <p>"Is this your first time here to <em>The Riviera</em>?" Federico asked Beckett and Julia.</p>
      <p>"It is, my daughter and I are looking forward to your cuisine from what we've been told about it," Beckett said as Castle held her chair as she sat.</p>
      <p>"I'm glad to hear it," Federico said, nodding to her. "Please enjoy the food, and if there is any way I can help your experience here tonight…"</p>
      <p>"We'll be sure to ask Federico," Castle said as he sat down. "He's the owner," he said to Beckett when the man had left.</p>
      <p>"I had a feeling," Beckett said, putting Julia's napkin on her lap. "He's seems nice. So I'm guessing you've been here often?"</p>
      <p>"We dine here almost every visit to the Hamptons," Martha said before sipping her wine. "So Federico is a dear, dear friend."</p>
      <p>"Meaning he gives us the best wine he has," Castle said in a low voice to Beckett.</p>
      <p>"I heard that Richard," Martha said. "And you're right, he does."</p>
      <p>Smiling as Castle had blanched slightly, Beckett turned to her daughter to help her with the menu. After they had ordered, she picked up her glass of wine and said, "A quick toast to this vacation. Desperately needed before we head into fall."</p>
      <p>"Cheers," Castle said, tapping his glass against hers. "It was a lot of fun, right Julia?"</p>
      <p>Nodding quickly, since she was sipping her drink, Julia put down her glass and said, "Lots, I loved the beach, and the pool too!"</p>
      <p>"Those are my favorites too," Alexis said. "And I heard you got to go hiking. My dad said you had a picnic out there in the woods."</p>
      <p>"Yeah, we saw a deer and lots of squirrels," Julia said excitedly. "I took a picture of the deer, it was so cute!" She then seemed to realize something, and she tugged on the side of her mother's dress asking in a rush, "Can I take Kauai home?"</p>
      <p>"Of course, I'm not leaving him here," Beckett said with a smile.</p>
      <p>"I think that was so sweet of you to do," Martha said to her son.</p>
      <p>"Well, I thought she might like a pet," Castle said. "I never really got one."</p>
      <p>"That's because I wasn't interested in a dog," Martha said. "Not in an apartment."</p>
      <p>"I told you I'd take care of it," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Can we get a doggie?" Julia asked Beckett.</p>
      <p>"I don't think so sweetie," she replied. "I know, I wish we could," she said when Julia looked disappointed. "But we're not home most of the day, think of how lonely a dog would be."</p>
      <p>"Kay, but I can still keep Kauai?" Julia said. When Beckett nodded she then said, "And can I show him to Grandpapa tomorrow?"</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said. "He'd love to see your fish I'm sure."</p>
      <p>Julia clapped happily and looked out on the water before she gasped and pointed to some fins in the distance. "Are they sharks?" she asked, a little scared at first.</p>
      <p>"No, they're not that pointed," Alexis said quickly, looking over to where Julia was indicating. "Now there are dolphins," she said.</p>
      <p>"Oooh, Mommy, see?" Julia said eagerly.</p>
      <p>"I see," Beckett said. She held onto her daughter when she stood up in her booster seat and watched the animals soon swim away from the restaurant. "Okay, I'm sure they're going out to eat," she said, trying to get Julia to sit down. "Which you should do now sweetie; our food is here."</p>
      <p>A few minutes later, once they had all taken a few bites of their food, Alexis leaned across the table slightly and asked Julia, "You never told me about your last day of summer camp."</p>
      <p>"That was when I went to the zoo," Julia said happily. "And the museum too. Are we gonna go still Mommy?"</p>
      <p>"Maybe next weekend," Beckett said. "You're welcome to come too," she directed to the others.</p>
      <p>"I'll take you up on that," Alexis said quickly. "If I don't have anything I need to do with school."</p>
      <p>"I'll go," Castle said. "I'd like to see how she is there. And you said you were trying to take her to all the museums in the city?"</p>
      <p>"Not all of them," Beckett said. "But most of them."</p>
      <p>"Which one is your favorite so far?" Alexis asked.</p>
      <p>"The one with the pretty stones," Julia said. "The sparkly ones."</p>
      <p>"The Natural History museum," Beckett said with a smile as she ran her hand over Julia's hair. "She's partial to the gemstones."</p>
      <p>"I agree with her completely," Martha said. "They have some exquisite pieces. They would make a preacher consider robbing them."</p>
      <p>"My mommy took me to the museum for police too," Julia said proudly. "And she knows people there."</p>
      <p>"You took her there?" Castle asked in surprise.</p>
      <p>"I did," Beckett said. "I've been there before and was careful about what she saw," she said in a low tone of voice so her daughter wouldn't hear. "But I thought it might make her realize my job is important. To understand it better."<br/>"What have you told her about your job?" Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Basically that I help people," Beckett said, glancing at Julia who was busy pushing some of the salad on her plate into a pile. "I didn't explain how exactly, but she knows what police do, so she took me at my word in that case." She then touched her daughter's shoulder and said, "Tell them what you liked at that museum Julia."</p>
      <p>"They had saddles!" Julia said happily. "I liked those. And they had uniforms too, old ones they wore before even my grandpapa was born!" she said in awe, making the others laugh at her expression of amazement. "My mommy has a uniform too," she said to Castle, Martha and Alexis.</p>
      <p>"We've seen her wearing it before," Alexis said, slowly, glancing at Beckett.</p>
      <p>"She showed it to me after we saw the museum," Julia said, not noticing her tone of voice. "And she let me wear her hat too!"</p>
      <p>"I bet you looked pretty nice in it," Castle said, smiling as Julia giggled at that and nodded firmly.</p>
      <p>"It was a fun little trip," Beckett said, finishing her wine after she spoke. She then talked to Martha about how her father was planning on taking her and Julia the first Friday of September to Broadway to attend the play <em>Annie</em>. When she told Castle's mother that it would be her daughter's first play, she had to smile as Martha talked to Julia about plays and acting, a subject that lasted through dinner as her daughter responded enthusiastically, peppering Martha with questions.</p>
      <p>"I think it's safe to say she'll enjoy Broadway," Castle said as he walked with Beckett arm in arm after the others as they left, Julia holding Martha's hand and talking with her still about theater.</p>
      <p>"It'll be good for her," Beckett said with a smile. "A little acting will help her if she really wants to be a professional dancer."</p>
      <p>"What if my mother wanted to teach her?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"I get the feeling her first day with your mom Julia will start her lessons," Beckett replied. "And I really don't mind it. Plus, it might help her come out of her shell a little."</p>
      <p>"Acting and dancing will help there," Castle agreed. "So this arrangement should work pretty well."</p>
      <p>"We'll need to see," Beckett said. "After the trial period remember."</p>
      <p>"Of course," Castle said, thought he knew that it was likely that trial period would be little more than a formality. "Are you hungry for something sweet Julia?" he called to the little girl who was standing with Martha and Alexis at his car. "Uh, if that's alright with your mom of course," he said, looking at Beckett and seeing her expression.</p>
      <p>"Oh Mommy, can we have dessert?" Julia begged, running over to her.</p>
      <p>"Yes, I don't think you'll stop asking me now Castle suggested it," Beckett said, picking her up. "But you're not full?"</p>
      <p>"No, but the food was very good," Julia said seriously to Castle. "Thank you."</p>
      <p>"I didn't make it, but you're welcome," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"What can we get for dessert Mommy?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"What do you feel like?" Castle asked her when Beckett looked at him.</p>
      <p>"Can we go to the bakery?" Julia said quickly.</p>
      <p>"Sure, Mother, Alexis, will you follow?" Castle said to them.</p>
      <p>"I'll head back home," Martha said.</p>
      <p>"I guess I'll come with you Dad," Alexis said.</p>
      <p>"Are you okay to get home?" Castle asked his mother.</p>
      <p>"I'm fine, and it's not that far," Martha said. "Go and get your dessert, I will be at the house when you return."</p>
      <p>"She'll be alright Dad," Alexis said. "Let's go before the bakery closes," she told him, tugging on his sleeve.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Castle said, glancing at Beckett.</p>
      <p>"She's okay to drive," she said quickly. "I would have said something when she said she wanted to go home if she wasn't."</p>
      <p>"Come on Julia, I get to ride in the back with you," Alexis said, holding her arms out to the little girl. "I'll put you in your car seat okay?"</p>
      <p>"She doesn't have to go to bed yet does she?" Castle asked as he opened the passenger door for Beckett.</p>
      <p>"I don't think so," Beckett replied. "I'll have to check the time once we get back to the house. Why?"</p>
      <p>"Thought she might like to walk down to the beach one last time," Castle said. "You still want to leave early tomorrow?"</p>
      <p>"I do, and it sounds like a good idea," Beckett said, squeezing his hand that was holding the door. "I know she'll love to get down to the sand again."</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>Running down the porch ahead of her mother, Julia hurried up to where Castle was sitting with his mother and Alexis in the gazebo and jumped up onto the seat next to him.</p>
      <p>"Almost made it," Castle said with a short laugh before he helped her up the rest of the way.</p>
      <p>"Julia, I told you to take it easy in that dress," Beckett said in a teasingly stern tone of voice.</p>
      <p>"Sorry Mommy, I wanted to see if I could jump on here," Julia said, smiling widely at her mother who sighed as she sat next to her.</p>
      <p>"That wasn't too bad, when you get to <em>jetés</em> you'll probably be able to jump really high," Alexis said as Julia leaned against her mother.</p>
      <p>"I think she gets to that later on this year in her class," Beckett said. "An introduction actually, since the girls are still pretty small."</p>
      <p>"Madame Claude knows how to <em>jeté</em>," Julia said, swinging her legs back and forth.</p>
      <p>"Speaking of ballet," Martha said after taking a sip of her coffee. "Show us some of the steps you learned Julia."</p>
      <p>Giggling softly at that, Julia pressed her cheek to Beckett's side and looked up at her questioningly.</p>
      <p>"You don't have to if you don't want to sweetie, but I think we should see if you remember the steps before Monday," Beckett told her.</p>
      <p>Julia got down with Beckett's help, and she put her feet in first position, her arms in second position. "Madame Claude taught that first," she said before she pointed her right foot forward and then tried to step forward but her shoe dragged on the floor. "Mommy, these shoes are too heavy," she complained, stomping her foot.</p>
      <p>"Take them off then," Beckett said, holding her hand so Julia could pull her shoes off. She smiled as Julia did some of the same steps she had performed at the recital.</p>
      <p>Instead of stopping after pirouetting once, Julia kept turning until she ran into Castle. She giggled as he held her steady when she lurched to the side; dizzy. "Was that good?" she asked, looking up at him.</p>
      <p>"Pretty good, should have added that to the end of your performance at the recital," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"No, I didn't have anyone to catch me," Julia said, going over to her mother and leaning on her legs. "Mommy, can I go down to the water?"</p>
      <p>"Of course, but you need to put your shoes on again," Beckett said. Once Julia had done so, she stood up and took her hand, leaving the gazebo.</p>
      <p>"I think I'll head to my room," Martha said, standing up. "It's going to be an early morning tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"Oh, say goodnight Julia," Beckett said, stopping her daughter when she heard that. She smiled as Julia waved and said, "Goodnight!" "Good night Martha, see you in the morning," she said.</p>
      <p>"Good night kiddo," Martha said as she passed Julia, gently chucking her under the chin to the little girl's giggle. "Good night Kate."</p>
      <p>"We'll meet you down on the beach," Castle said to Beckett as he followed after his mother and Alexis to the house.</p>
      <p>"We'll be waiting," Beckett replied before she turned to go down the steps onto the grass.</p>
      <p>Waiting on the sand a while later, Julia was looking at a shell in the moonlight when she glanced up and saw that Castle and Alexis were walking to them. "Here they are Mommy!" she said happily, skipping up to them. At the point where the grass became sand her shoes hit a clump of grass and she fell forward, her hands breaking her fall.</p>
      <p>"Julia!" Beckett exclaimed, running over to her daughter the best she could in her heels.</p>
      <p>"Are you okay?" Alexis said, reaching Julia just after her father had.</p>
      <p>"Shh, it's okay, you just got some sand on your skirt," Castle said, picking Julia up and brushing off her dress. "Did you hurt your hands?" he asked as the little girl didn't stop crying.</p>
      <p>"She's alright," Beckett said, looking at Julia's hands. "Your knees?" she asked. When she looked at the little girl's legs, she saw her tights weren't torn and she sighed in relief. "You're okay sweetie," she said before taking her and holding her tightly. "You scared me."</p>
      <p>"Sorry," Julia whispered, trying to stop crying.</p>
      <p>"I know you didn't mean to do that," Beckett said, pressing her lips to Julia's forehead gently. She gave her a soft kiss before she said, "Want to go inside now?"</p>
      <p>"No, please can we still go to the water?" Julia said, her chest hitching slightly.</p>
      <p>"Are you sure you're okay?" Beckett asked her. When Julia nodded she looked at Castle and Alexis who were watching her and said, "She'll be alright."</p>
      <p>"Can I go down Mommy?" Julia asked as Beckett turned to walk down the sand. "Thank you," she said before she walked back to Alexis.</p>
      <p>"Stay with her," Beckett said before she felt Castle's hand on her back. "I hate hearing her cry like that."</p>
      <p>Castle didn't say anything, studying her closely as she watched her daughter. When she didn't speak again he said, "It doesn't bring back Queens does it?"</p>
      <p>"No," Beckett said. "The kind of crying she did there… I don't want to ever hear again."</p>
      <p>"Of course," Castle said, reaching down and taking her hand. "I had to ask, sorry."</p>
      <p>"I understand," Beckett said, breathing in deeply. "I'm fine though, I'm finding I can work past those memories easier now. Well, the ones I get if it's mentioned. The others that are brought on by something physical I need more time to get past."</p>
      <p>Castle murmured something that he hoped sounded like agreement, and he then quickly changed the subject saying, "You and Julia will have to come back here soon since she enjoyed it so much."</p>
      <p>"We haven't even left yet and you're jumping ahead that far?" Beckett asked with a slight smile.</p>
      <p>"You heard Julia earlier, she wants to come back," Castle said, shrugging.</p>
      <p>"I don't know about soon, but I wouldn't mind coming back," Beckett said. She smiled wider as Julia walked a little quickly up to her and she took the shell she'd held out saying, "You found this?"</p>
      <p>"Yeah, can I take it home?" Julia asked happily.</p>
      <p>"I think we should put it back," Beckett said gently. "We have a whole bag of shells for your room remember?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said. She looked down at the shell and then rolled it down the sand until it hit the breaking wave in front of her. She stepped closer to her mother, wrapping her arms around her legs and pressing her cheek against her side with a deep sigh.</p>
      <p>"Now it's time to head back inside," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Oh Mommy, no, I want to rest very fast," Julia said in protest.</p>
      <p>"Come on," Beckett said, picking her daughter up. "I let you stay up tonight since it's the last one of vacation, but you really need sleep."</p>
      <p>Sighing in frustration, Julia wrapped her arms around her mother's neck and pressed her cheek to hers. "Are you going to bed too?" she asked Alexis who was walking behind Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, it's pretty late and I need to get up early," Alexis replied with a reassuring smile. "So you're not alone."</p>
      <p>Inside Julia's room, Beckett changed her daughter into her pajamas, putting her clothes away in her suitcase before she sat on the edge of the bed with Julia. "I know you don't want to leave," she said as she gently undid the braid in the little girl's reddish brown hair. "But Castle did say he wants us to come back again."</p>
      <p>"He did?" Julia asked eagerly.</p>
      <p>"I did," Castle said, appearing in the doorway. "Alexis is going to come over and say goodnight to Julia, so I'm waiting for her here," he directed to Beckett. "But I was serious when I told you earlier Julia; you two can definitely come back."</p>
      <p>"Thank you!" Julia said happily, bouncing a little as her mother brushed out her hair.</p>
      <p>"Okay sweetie, into bed," Beckett said once she had managed to finish.</p>
      <p>"Goodnight Julia," Alexis said, stepping up to the doorway then. "I'll see you tomorrow."</p>
      <p>"Night Julia," Castle said simply as the little girl waved at his daughter.</p>
      <p>After she had said goodnight to Alexis and she and Julia were alone, Beckett turned to her daughter and helped her under the sheet, covering her as she said, "I'll be waking you up tomorrow a little early."</p>
      <p>"What do we do tomorrow?" Julia asked, yawning slightly.</p>
      <p>"We need to finish packing, and then we'll leave," Beckett said simply, stroking Julia's hair off her forehead.</p>
      <p>"Can I say bye to the beach before?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Yes," Beckett said with a smile. "But no running like you did earlier sweetie."</p>
      <p>"I'm sorry for being silly Mommy," Julia said, though she was smiling back at her mother.</p>
      <p>"It's okay, everyone does that," Beckett said. "And you're okay, so I'm not mad."</p>
      <p>"Good," Julia sighed, hugging her Stitch doll to her tighter with one arm. "Can I have a hug?" she asked in a small voice.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said, pulling down the sheet and taking her daughter into her arms tightly. "Hmm, I'm so glad you're so happy now sweetie," she murmured as she kissed Julia's temple.</p>
      <p>"Me too, I'm sorry for being scared of Castle for a long, long time," Julia said, pulling back a little and tangling her fingers through Beckett's hair.</p>
      <p>"That's alright, you didn't remember him that well," Beckett said. "Remember what Patricia told us. That you forgot some things and you forgot him too. But I am glad you're not scared of him anymore too."</p>
      <p>"I think I'm sleepy Mommy," Julia said, sounding drained then as she slid her fingers out of her mother's hair.</p>
      <p>"Then into bed," Beckett said easily. She tucked Julia under the bed sheet again and then shared a kiss with her before kissing her forehead firmly. "Sweet dreams Julia, I love you," she told her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Night Mommy, I love you," Julia sighed as she held her doll tightly to her and then rolled onto her side.</p>
      <p>Beckett carefully stood and walked over to the doorway, not having to wait long before she saw Julia was fast asleep. Smiling, she turned off the light and when she had her hand on the doorknob she tensed when she felt a hand on her back. She realized who it was after that initial startle, and closed the door behind her before turning to Castle. "You heard what she said," she stated.</p>
      <p>"I swear I didn't do that intentionally," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"I know, I thought you might come back from saying goodnight to Alexis," Beckett said, taking his hand and walking down the hall with him. "But I think we'll be okay after we get back to the city and you're not with us almost constantly."</p>
      <p>"We'll see Sunday night when I come over," Castle said.</p>
      <p>"Yes we will," Beckett said absently as she stepped into the room and walked around the bed. She saw a bucket of ice with champagne in it two glasses on the table in front of the lit fireplace. "Another celebration? Or are you trying to get me incredibly drunk?" she asked Castle as she sat down on one of the ottomans at the table.</p>
      <p>"The first," Castle said, picking up the bottle and untwisting the tie to open it. "Unless you're drunk already, then it's going to end up being a mix of both."</p>
      <p>"I could drive if I wanted to right now," Beckett said. "Though if you're planning on drinking that whole bottle I'd stay off the road."</p>
      <p>"I plan on staying in at this point," Castle said after he'd managed to get the cork out of the bottle. "Hopefully you do too."</p>
      <p>"I don't know," Beckett said absently, trying not to smile. "I thought we could walk back down to the beach." She couldn't hold back when Castle looked at her in surprise, and she smiled widely before she took the glass he'd just filled. "But I think I'm happy enough here for the rest of the night," she said, raising her glass.</p>
      <p>Sitting next to her once he'd had the other glass filled; Castle held it up and said, "To the past two weeks and your finally not looking so pale."</p>
      <p>"To you for thinking of bringing us here," Beckett said quickly. She smiled as he grinned slightly and they tapped their glasses together. "It was the best thing you could have done for my daughter. And also I'm so glad your mom and Alexis came too."</p>
      <p>"Julia already trusts them though," Castle pointed out. "And she's stayed with them for a long period of time too."</p>
      <p>"I know, but it's been a while, I just wanted to make absolutely sure she'd be alright," Beckett said before sipping her champagne. "But I'm definitely relieved about what's going to happen to her after school."</p>
      <p>"So you're ready to head back to work," Castle stated.</p>
      <p>"Very much so," Beckett said, nodding slightly. "I just worry still about what's going to happen to Julia should something happen to me. I know," she said quickly when he started to speak. "I have her taken care of in my will, but… how she'll be scares me."</p>
      <p>"You've done pretty well so far," Castle said slowly, reaching over and taking her hand. "And you manage to look out for me as well as yourself, so I think you'll be okay."</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled at that and leaned over, sharing a kiss with him before she pulled back saying, "I get the feeling you've been watching out for me a lot more now since Queens."</p>
      <p>"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't," Castle said, sliding his hand up and down her back. "We don't need to go through something like that again."</p>
      <p>"Of course not, but I think we'll be fine," Beckett said. "I do appreciate the fact you want to do that."</p>
      <p>"It's not a problem," Castle said, shrugging. He pushed her hair back over her left shoulder, and slid his hand over her skin, watching as it broke out into goose bumps after his touch.</p>
      <p>"I had a feeling you'd enjoy this dress," Beckett said, trying to sound teasing though her heart was pounding heavily in response to his caress.</p>
      <p>"Yeah, I had a fun time trying to figure out all night how these weren't falling," Castle said, fingering the right strap of her navy blue dress that was perched on the very edge of her shoulder.</p>
      <p>"I know, I had a hard time believing that didn't happen," Beckett said, smiling as he ran his hand down her arm. "But I loved your reaction when you first saw me. You looked shocked; did you think that just because I'm a mother I'd dress differently?"</p>
      <p>"No, I just wasn't sure how you'd dress with Julia coming to dinner with us," Castle replied. He glanced down at her neckline, and looked up when he felt Beckett's fingers under his chin. "Yeah, wasn't expecting that."</p>
      <p>"Glad to know there's something about me you don't know," Beckett said with a smile. She then leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck before pressing her lips against his. She was pleased when he quickly responded, and she could feel his hands on her back, pulling down the zipper easily. "It's a little funny," she commented as they parted and she leaned back so he could pull her dress down her body as far as it would go. "I chose this dress, thinking I'd maybe seduce you in it, and I seemed to have lost the chance."</p>
      <p>"Don't worry, you did," Castle said before he kissed her quickly. He tried to get her to stand so he could get the dress off, but she instead slid her hands under his blazer. "And you're doing it again, although if it was off you-" he said, sounding a little desperate as the blue fabric was hanging off her enough to partially reveal her breasts, but not enough for him. He was cut off when she kissed him deeply, and he could feel her grabbing his tie as he shrugged his jacket off his arms. "Okay, you-" he started to say when they pulled apart to get a quick breath of air. He was frustrated when she kissed him again, that time deeper than before as she began to unbutton his dress shirt.</p>
      <p>Beckett finally stood up once she had gotten Castle's shirt open, and as he followed her she let him push her dress to the floor. She reached up and cupped his cheeks as he kissed her hard, and she hurried to respond to him while they rushed to finish undressing each other. Their kisses became a little frantic, and she wasn't too surprised when, the second they were naked, Castle pulled her down to the floor with him, the short few steps to the bed seeming to be miles to them both. She hurried to straddle him, and the second they were coupled she leaned down, kissing him as she began to move, feeling him responding to the kiss and to her barely a second later.</p>
      <p>Running his hands up Beckett's sides as she sat up again, Castle watched her closely, trying to remember her as she looked. It wasn't the first time he'd seen her in that same position, but it never failed to amaze him how much he loved to see her like that. The years he'd waited for her to return his feelings seemed like they had passed in seconds as he pushed himself up then, and kissed her deeply. The joy of just being with her was enough to ease the few nightmares he'd suffered through since she and Julia had been kidnapped, and he held her tightly against him, his fingers digging into her back. He wanted to feel her, as a way to reassure himself that he wasn't dreaming and she was alright. He moved to her neck, kissing it and sliding down to her shoulders, nipping gently at her collar bone on both sides, feeling her jerk against him slightly. He hurried back up to her lips, the slight taste of perspiration on her smooth skin enough to assure him that she was definitely not a dream.</p>
      <p>Cupping Castle's face in her hands, Beckett pulled away and pressed her forehead to his, slowing down before he grabbed her tightly against him and they moved together. She felt her skin warming up, though under his roaming hands all over the back and front of her body, a short shock of pleasure made it rise up in goose bumps and she was trembling; though she was anything but cold. She kissed him and shortly after she could feel him losing control; her grip on his back tightened visibly as she followed him, her short cry disappearing into his mouth as they didn't pull away until he seemed to collapse on the floor. She followed him, pressing her forehead to his shoulder, trying to cool down her very much overheated skin from the rush that climax had provided. But she didn't have any luck, his skin was as hot as her own was.</p>
      <p>"Sorry about that," Castle said suddenly when he felt he could talk and actually make sense a minute later.</p>
      <p>"About what?" Beckett asked, thinking he was going to apologize for making love with her.</p>
      <p>"Not taking a couple steps in that direction," Castle said, motioning to the bed.</p>
      <p>"I wasn't going to walk that far," Beckett said making a dismissive sound as she got up. She got on the bed and lay back in the middle as Castle followed her. "I didn't mind that though."</p>
      <p>"I thought so, but you know, it doesn't hurt to check," Castle said, lying on his side next to her. He leaned over, kissing her gently before he pulled back.</p>
      <p>"Do you remember," Beckett began, tucking some of her hair behind her left ear. "What you said the day we got here?"</p>
      <p>"When?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"On the beach. About coming here," Beckett said. "And how it was a good place for Julia and I to heal."</p>
      <p>"I remember," Castle said. "Do you think you at least started the process?"</p>
      <p>"I think we did," Beckett said, a slow smile spreading across her lips.</p>
      <p>"I noticed with us, you're not seeing Harris anymore," Castle said, watching her carefully at the reminder of what she had been through.</p>
      <p>"I'm not," Beckett said simply. "I'm forgetting about him easily now. Give me more time and that will be a more permanent thing. But," she said slowly as she cupped his cheek. "I think I'm ready to test if I'm recovering from what happened again."</p>
      <p>"How?" Castle asked, a little surprised but seeing she was serious from the look in her eyes. He watched her as she slid her hand down to his, and laced their fingers together, giving it a quick squeeze. "Are you sure?" he asked her, knowing what she wanted.</p>
      <p>"Sure? No, but I need to try this at least. Short of handcuffs, I think that's as far as I could honestly go at the moment," Beckett said.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Castle agreed. He then kissed her, tenderly, as he took her wrists into his hand. He held them above her head, keeping an eye on her, waiting to see if she would start panicking. They had tried that two months before, but it had been too much for Beckett and he'd had to calm her down as she had nearly hit him though she knew she wasn't about to be raped. "Good?" he asked as he reached up with his free hand and brushed his fingers against her lips.</p>
      <p>"Yes," Beckett said, her momentary surge of adrenaline slowing down. She hadn't been able to help it; when he had first held her down she had begun to feel alarm creeping up on her. But as she carefully tried to move her hands and found she could, along with Castle's grip not being tight enough to hurt, she relaxed. "I'm fine," she said quickly as she watched him staring at her. She was a little surprised when he suddenly kissed her, lunging at her almost. Her panic was gone the second his lips crushed hers, and she was responding as his hand reached in between them, running down slowly from under her breasts to her abdomen, skin trembling at the contact.</p>
      <p>Pulling back, Castle kept close enough to trail his lips down Beckett's chin to her neck where he pressed a few, quick kisses. His hand was still in between them, caressing her skin, feeling her shaking slightly every time his fingers trailed over it. He moved down to the hollow of her throat, and there nipped at it a few times, hearing her breathing growing more and more intense. Sliding down further, he slipped his free hand underneath her body, pressing her back up as his mouth drifted down around her breasts and he could feel the tension in her form as he held her. Taking each nipple almost desperately, he felt her hands fighting against his grip. He kept a firm hold on her, wanting to make sure she could take that step, but trying not to hurt her at the same time. He finally lost patience with himself, and pulled away slowly before tilting his head up to look at her.</p>
      <p>Breathing a little hard, though not much had been done to stimulate her, Beckett tried again to move her hands from Castle's grasp. He never let go for a second, and she had to wait for him to push himself up and lay on top of her, his free arm supporting his weight as they kissed. She slid her legs apart slightly as the lower half of his body rested against hers, and a quick gasp slipped into his mouth from hers as he entered her. She wrapped her right leg around him, as high as she could get it, hoping he got with that that she was trusting him completely. His first thrust inside of her was her answer, and she braced herself the best she could as she could tell he was going to be a lot rougher than she'd been when they'd been together on the floor.</p>
      <p>Sliding his lips over Beckett's, Castle moved over her cheek, knowing she could feel the heat of his breath as the moans out of her mouth near his ear clued him to that. He pulled back enough to look at her, wanting to check her again, to make absolutely sure that she was alright. The look of pleasure in her eyes as she opened them nearly left him breathless, and he kissed her hard, nearly hard enough to hurt. He let go of her wrists then, and felt her arms wrap around his neck before her fingers slid through his hair. He groaned against her lips before he jerked back with a gasp, desperate for breath. He slid his now free hand under her head, trying to tangle his fingers through her hair, her mouth pressed close to his.</p>
      <p>It was then that Beckett knew she was past Harris and his near assault on her. The way Castle was holding her she knew her mind could have easily thrown her back in that hallway, fighting for her life and Julia's. But while his grip was firm, it was in no way controlling, or emotionless. She knew he wanted her, was in love with her, and it was why she wanted to get over everything in Queens. She cupped Castle's cheek in her hand, and turned him to her mouth, pressing her lips to his. She felt his hand leave her hair, and slide down the side of her body until he reached her hip. She broke off their second kiss to let out a quick cry of surprise mixed with pleasure as he began to slowly rub his fingers at the apex of her legs. She lost control of the rhythm her body was moving with his, and had to concentrate to get it back. Seconds and minutes passed then, heedless of her attention as she focused on him, feeling him pleasuring her body, herself; and she did the best she could to give the same back to him, feeling he more than deserved it for all he had done for her.</p>
      <p>"Kate," Castle hissed slightly as he pulled away from her shoulders, detouring there as he'd come up from her breasts. "I love you."</p>
      <p>"I love you," Beckett whispered, closing her eyes tightly. "Castle I love you," she told him before he was crushing her lips with his own again. She tried to keep up with him, but it was as if something inside of her had snapped, and her back was arching, taking her from their kiss. She thought she might have screamed, but the roar in her ears was making it hard to hear anything but the steady beat of her heart that took over everything else. She felt him press his face against her neck shortly after her and his lips were moving; in what she took to be her name. She held onto him tightly until they had finally slowed their bodies, which soon stopped completely, exhaustion taking over. Panting a little hard, she ran her hand over his hair and down to his shoulders, feeling how damp his skin was.</p>
      <p>"Are we good?" Castle asked, almost forgetting the fact that they had done the first light bondage since before the Queens case.</p>
      <p>"Yes," Beckett said. "Thank you."</p>
      <p>"You're welcome, and thank you for letting me be the one to help you," Castle said before he carefully got off of her. He wrapped his arms around her as Beckett slid against his side. They were both quiet then, their breathing making an erratic rhythm with the breaking waves outside.</p>
      <p>"My doctor has been telling me not to be discouraged if I find myself still struggling with Harris in my mind," Beckett suddenly said, looking up at Castle.</p>
      <p>"And now?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"He's gone, all I could see was you Castle," Beckett said before she leaned her head up, kissing him as deeply as she could. She let him gently roll her onto her back, and when they parted she traced his lips with her fingertips.</p>
      <p>Castle brushed his lips over her fingers, and then took her wrist, laying it down on the bed before he laced their fingers together. He kissed her harder then; before he moved enough to gently, slowly enter her body as he took her gasps and slight moans of pleasure in reaction into his mouth.</p>
      <p>As they proceeded to make love again, that time their bodies in an unspoken agreement as they moved together leisurely, deliberately, Beckett was more determined to finish what that two week leave had begun. To settle into her life more comfortably as a mother and an officer, and to continue in her relationship with Castle. It was not easy to juggle all three things that were so wildly different from each other; even working with Castle had never made their relationship smooth; but she felt then, pleasure coursing through her veins as they continued their lovemaking; that she would do the best she possibly could. Her daughter, Castle and her career, all were the most important things to her. Back in the city the next day she would have a fresh chance to handle everything the best she possibly could, and she was going to take advantage of that, Julia's love, and Castle's as well giving her the strength she needed to face what might happen to her life, as changed; for the better; as it had become.</p>
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<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Epilogue- Every Morning Comes Around</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The title of this chapter comes from the song Sun Is Shining by The Fireman (Paul McCartney and Youth) from their album Electric Arguments.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
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      <p>"Going to wake her up?" Castle asked, looking up from the cuff of his shirt as Beckett stepped into the room.</p>
      <p>"I'm not looking forward to it," Beckett replied. "But I need to. I'm just hoping she slept some."</p>
      <p>"I'll get breakfast for you," Castle said. "Something special for her."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Beckett said with a smile before she walked out of the room and went down to her daughter's. She sighed as she opened the door and saw that Julia was still fast asleep. Sitting on the edge of the bed she gently stroked the little girl's hair and when she let out a groan, turning onto her other side, said softly, "Sweetie, it's time to wake up."</p>
      <p>"No," Julia said, still groaning as Beckett shook her shoulder. "Mommy, stop," she complained as she was still being shaken lightly.</p>
      <p>"I can't, you need to get up or you'll be late," Beckett said. "Me too. But you need to get up and get ready." She smiled when Julia turned onto her back and looked up and her and she said, "Good morning Julia."</p>
      <p>"Morning Mommy," Julia said, grabbing her Stitch doll and holding it tightly to her. "Do I have to go?"</p>
      <p>"Like I said every time you asked, you do," Beckett replied simply. "Come on; let's go wash your face so you'll wake up." She picked Julia up; kissing her cheek tenderly as her daughter wrapped her arms and legs tightly around her.</p>
      <p>Yawning after they were back in the bedroom, Julia sat crossed legged on her bed as her mother grabbed some clothes from her closet and she sighed deeply. "Can't I wear a Beatles shirt Mommy?" she asked as looked at her school uniform.</p>
      <p>"You need to wear this, all the other girls will," Beckett replied. "And the boys will be wearing uniforms too. Come on, stand up or we won't get to have breakfast. It's a surprise today," she said, trying to tempt her daughter.</p>
      <p>"It is?" Julia asked as she raised her arms so Beckett could take off her pajama top.</p>
      <p>"It is. Castle's making it, I actually have no idea what it is, so it's a surprise for me too," Beckett said as she put the blue and white plaid jumper on her daughter after putting on a white blouse. "There, you look very cute sweetie," she said with a smile.</p>
      <p>Julia didn't reply to that, merely helped her mother help her with the white knee high socks she had to wear, before stepping into her shoes on the floor.</p>
      <p>"How do you want me to do your hair?" Beckett asked as she went into the bathroom to grab a brush.</p>
      <p>"I don't care," Julia said, hugging Stitch to her then as she leaned against the bed.</p>
      <p>"Come here," Beckett said, coming out and seeing that Julia had her face buried in the doll's head. She picked Julia up and sat on the edge of the bed, cradling the little girl tightly. "I know you're scared, but you have to remember, all the other kids will be nervous. It's the first day of school for them too, not just you."</p>
      <p>"It is?" Julia asked hopefully. When her mother nodded she sighed again and then said in a tiny voice, "Will you miss me?"</p>
      <p>"Oh sweetie," Beckett said, hugging her a little tighter. "Are you worried I'm going to take you to school and leave you there?" When Julia nodded she sighed and hugged her again saying, "I will miss you every second until I pick you up at Castle's today. And tomorrow too."</p>
      <p>"All the days?" Julia asked, giggling slightly.</p>
      <p>Nodding Beckett kissed her forehead tenderly and then pulled back saying, "But I will miss you Julia, and I'll be very happy once I see you again later. And you'll have something to tell me now when we have dinner."</p>
      <p>"I do?" Julia asked in surprise.</p>
      <p>"Of course," Beckett said. "You have to tell me how your day is at school. I want to hear everything you get to do and learn. And if you make any friends." She smiled a little when Julia bit her lower lip in what she knew was nervousness, and she leaned down, kissing her forehead gently again. "I'm sure you'll have friends by the end of today."</p>
      <p>"Will you be mad if I won't?" Julia said anxiously.</p>
      <p>"No, if you don't want to you don't have to. But I get the feeling you'll meet some girls in your class who will want to play with you," Beckett said. She glanced down at her watch and said, "Oh, we need to hurry or you won't be able to eat breakfast. Let me do your hair very quickly and I'll take some pictures for your grandpapa, so he can see you on your first day of school," as she hurriedly started to brush her daughter's hair.</p>
      <p>"Hey, I was just going to see if you were coming to eat," Castle said as he met Beckett and Julia coming out of the room. "Everything set?" he asked Beckett.</p>
      <p>"Pretty much," she replied. "We need to eat though, she'll end up being late," she said, leading Julia to the table.</p>
      <p>"Okay, here you go Julia," Castle said, walking to the table after making a quick stop at the kitchen. He set down a plate in front of her and said, "My special pancakes for your first day of school."</p>
      <p>Julia smiled, a short giggle escaping from her lips as she looked down at the pancakes with smiley faces on them. "Thank you," she said, looking up at him as Beckett walked over with a glass of apple juice.</p>
      <p>"You'll like them," Castle urged her to eat as she didn't move.</p>
      <p>"Come on Julia," Beckett said, a little firmly as she sat down at the end of the table. "Eat or else you'll be too tired at school." She tried not to get too frustrated when Julia shook her head slowly and then said, "What if I fed you?" She didn't wait for her daughter to answer, instead reached down and picked up her fork, cutting a piece off and putting it to Julia's mouth. "Open," she said. "Or else we won't be able to go to the museum this Saturday." She nodded as Julia took the fork from her and ate, saying, "Thank you sweetie."</p>
      <p>"I was worried you didn't like my pancakes," Castle said as he came back to the table with a plate and cup of coffee. "What do you think?" he asked Julia as he sat down on the other side of Beckett.</p>
      <p>Julia didn't answer, only nodded her head before she ate another slice after her mother cut it for her. She then shook her head and said, when Beckett tried to get her to eat a third slice, "I don't want more, my tummy is full."</p>
      <p>"It can't be," Beckett said. "Please Julia, a little more for me?"</p>
      <p>Julia slowly ate the third piece, making a face as she did so.</p>
      <p>"So she doesn't like them?" Castle asked, surprised since he'd thought she would love them.</p>
      <p>"She's nervous," Beckett said quickly. "Just half of it and then you can go look at the book your grandpapa gave you last night." When her daughter shook her head, she tried to feed her, but Julia kept her mouth closed and she looked at Castle, discouraged.</p>
      <p>"Why don't you show me the book?" Castle said. When Beckett looked at him and started to protest, he held his hand up to stop her as Julia hopped off her chair and ran over to the coffee table. "Sit here with me, that way I can eat my breakfast still while you're showing it to me," he told her, picking her up when she held the book out to him, standing next to his chair.</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled as she watched Castle while he looked at the book that Julia was holding. While her daughter was pointing out the pictures, and telling him what they were of, he was feeding her some pieces of pancake, asking her to taste and see if they tasted alright. She was able to return to her own meal, and ate quickly, paying attention to the time before they had finished. "Okay, go and grab your backpack sweetie and then we'll head out," she said as she and Castle hurried to clear the table.</p>
      <p>"Did you like the book?" Julia asked Castle eagerly. When he nodded she turned to her mother and asked, "Can I take it to school?"<br/>"Of course, can you put it in your backpack by yourself?" Beckett said. She smiled when Julia nodded firmly and gently nudged her in the direction of their rooms. "Then go and put it away to take, we'll wait here for you," she said. When they were alone, she turned to Castle and took the end of the dish towel he was drying his hands with, doing the same with her own. "Thank you so much for that," she said earnestly. "I had no idea what else to do."</p>
      <p>"You'll get creative as the years go by," Castle said with a slight nod. "But I did that with Alexis once, her first day of third grade. Worked pretty well too so when Julia mentioned the book I had to try it again. Your dad gave that to her?"</p>
      <p>"He did," Beckett said, going to her work bag in the entryway and checking to make sure she had everything. "Along with a couple of shirts and that pyrite she showed you when you came over last night."</p>
      <p>"So he's set with being her grandfather," Castle commented, peering at the door to make sure Julia wasn't within earshot.</p>
      <p>"He is, I told you he took to her pretty quickly," Beckett said as she took the towel from him and folded it. "It was sweet to watch them last night," she commented as she walked over to the door to the bedrooms.</p>
      <p>"She trusts him?" Castle asked.</p>
      <p>"She does, which is a relief because I definitely didn't want her afraid of her grandfather," Beckett said before she smiled at him and went to Julia's room. She smiled a little wider, thinking of the night before and the visit from her father.</p>
      <hr/>
      <p>
        <em>"Do you think Grandpapa will like my drawing?" Julia asked her mother, leaning back against her as she held up a piece of paper.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I think so, you did a great job with the water," Beckett said, touching the blue in the picture that was supposed to be of the beach at the Hamptons. "He'll love it," she assured the little girl, kissing her temple. There was a knock and she smiled saying, "That's him, come on, you can give it to him once you say hi." She got up off the couch and carried Julia to the door, setting her down before she checked outside. She felt Julia pull away from her before she opened the door. "Hi Dad," she said with a smile as she stepped back to let him in.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Katie, how are you?" her father asked as he hugged her.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'm good, come in," Beckett said, ushering him inside.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "There's my granddaughter," Jim said, looking at Beckett with a smile. "Do I get a hug?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Julia, who was hiding a little in the doorway, rushed over to him and cried out slightly when Jim picked her up before hugging her. She wrapped her arms around his neck tightly and said, "Hi Grandpapa."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "How was your trip?" Jim asked as he leaned down to pick up the bag he'd set on the floor.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It was fun," Julia said. "Oh! I drawed a picture for you." She looked around and then said worriedly, "Mommy, I don't see it."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You dropped it sweetie, here," Beckett said. "Go ahead and sit Dad, we're waiting for dinner to be delivered."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Good, I'll have a chance to see your drawing and I can show you what I got you and your mother from Washington DC," Jim said before he took Julia over to the couch.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Beckett got a glass of water for her father before she walked over to join him and her daughter. She smiled as she watched them, Julia eagerly pointing out the different parts of her drawing.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It sounds like you had a great time," Jim told Julia as she ran out of things to say about her picture. "Why don't I show you what I bought you?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Are they presents?" Julia asked as her mother got the bag that was on the floor.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "They are, since you and your mom didn't get to go with me," Jim said, taking out two t-shirts that were folded together. "I hope these fit," he said to Beckett.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "They should," she replied quickly as Julia ran her fingers over the name of the city embroidered on the first shirt. "They're really cute. What do you think Julia?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Thank you Grandpapa," Julia said happily as she ran her hand over the second shirt which had a faded design of an old map of the city on it. "It looks like a diamond."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It is, I wish you could have gone with me, but it sounds like you had more fun in the Hamptons," Jim said before reaching into the bag and pulling out a book. "This is so you can see what DC looks like."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Ooh, look at the pretty house," Julia cooed as she looked at the cover of the book which was an alphabet book of the city. "Mommy, look!" she said eagerly, handing it over to her.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Beckett took the open book and read the page that Julia had randomly opened it to, seeing that it was on S, and about the Smithsonian museums. "This is perfect," she told her father. "And I think Julia will enjoy it," she said, slight laughter in her voice as Julia was leaning over and peering at the pictures on the page.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'm glad I picked it out," Jim said as he reached into the bag. "And I got this for you too," he told his granddaughter as he handed her a large gold stone.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Gold?" Julia asked in amazement, staring at the rock in her hands.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That's pyrite," Jim told her. "Miners looking for gold would think that was the real thing."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It's pretty. Thank you, and for my book too Grandpapa," Julia said, hugging him tightly. "What did you get Mommy?" she then asked, peering up at him.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I went to the National Museum of Natural History," Jim said as he reached into the bag one last time. "Collette and Jason were going and invited me with them," he explained to his daughter. "They were having a special exhibit and this was being sold in the gift shop. I saw it and thought of my daughter. My granddaughter too, but mainly you Katie."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "They had an exhibit on the Romanovs?" Beckett asked as she took the book he held out.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, Faberge eggs," Jim corrected. "They were selling a lot of merchandise about the Romanovs since a lot of the eggs they had at the museum had belonged to them. I remembered how interested you were in their story, and picked out this book."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Thank you," Beckett said, flipping through the book a little before she hugged her father around Julia. "Want to tell us any more about your trip? How was the conference?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Actually I'd like to hear about your trip," Jim said. "Julia?" He smiled when the little girl glanced up at him and asked, "What did you do in the Hamptons while you were there? Did you swim?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah," Julia said, closing her book she'd been looking at while he and Beckett had been talking. "And in a pool and in the ocean. It was fun but I got scared in the pool first. But then I liked it. And we went to a fair! Castle-" she started to say before she suddenly was quiet, biting her lower lip.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It's okay," Beckett quickly assured her. "He knows already remember."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "What did you do at the fair with your mother and Castle?" Jim asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Can I show him Mommy?" Julia asked eagerly. When her mother nodded she got down from her grandfather's lap and took his hand, pulling him towards her room. "See my fishy?" she said as she took him to her dresser where Kauai's tank had been placed.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "How nice, your first pet," Jim said. "You bought her a fish?" he asked his daughter.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, Castle won it for me at the fair Grandpapa," Julia said, tugging on his sleeve. "He let me try to win it but I didn't. But he did and he bought all this for Kauai."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Kauai?" Jim asked a little confusingly.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It's the island in Lilo and Stitch," Beckett explained before there was a knock on the door. "There's dinner, I'll get it. Stay Dad," she told him as he started to turn. "Spend time with Julia, she kept asking about you while we were gone."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, I wish you could come with us, it was fun," Julia said, reaching up to him.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Next time maybe," Jim said as he picked her up. "So how are you feeling about tomorrow? It's your first day of school."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, I don't wanna go," Julia said, looking a little nervous.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I don't think kids want to, but they need to learn," Jim said as he took her out to the kitchen where Beckett was opening some take out boxes. "It's important to read and write. Don't you want to learn to read so you can read books by yourself?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "But I want you and Mommy and Castle to read to me too," Julia protested. "And Alexis and Martha too."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "They came to the beach house the last five days we were there," Beckett said as her father looked at her in confusion. "And they read to her a few times."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Castle too?" Jim asked, surprised. He knew already of his granddaughter's fear of men, having had to gain her trust himself after Beckett had adopted her.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, he was funny, he made voices when he read to me about Alice," Julia said.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Well I'm sure he's read his own books at his signings," Jim said, looking at his daughter. At her slight nod he said, "Then he's probably a great reader."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, I like when he reads the best after Mommy does," Julia said. "Ooh, pelmeni!" she cried, seeing the food in the boxes.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Russian?" Jim said as he set Julia down.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She asked for it," Beckett said with a smile. "And I got stroganoff too, I know you enjoy that." Grabbing a plate she then said, "Come here sweetie, tell me what you want to eat."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Sitting down at the table first, Julia waited for her mother and grandfather, sitting on her knees and watching them in the kitchen. As she sat back down normally once they joined her, she suddenly remembered something and grabbed Jim's hand, tugging on it excitedly.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "What is it?" Jim asked, worried until he saw Julia's expression.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I forgot to say when we were at the beach Castle got us tickets to get to see Paul," Julia said, the words spilling out of her mouth as fast as she could say them. "We're gonna see him right in front, and Castle said he'll throw my record to give it to Paul to sign!"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I thought you said those tickets were sold out?" Jim asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "They were, of course I was trying to get seats a lot further back, and I don't have the kind of connections that apparently Castle has at Shea," Beckett said with a smile. "I'll have to ask him if he could get us some good seats for a game next year."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That would be nice," Jim said, smiling. "So you're going to get to see Paul, I can only imagine how excited you are," he said, glancing at his daughter when a short laugh was smothered by a cough by Beckett, since Julia was almost bouncing out of her seat.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'm a lot Grandpapa, I never saw Paul before and now I get to see him really close," Julia said, starting to eat as her mother urged her. "And he's going to play his songs."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I hope he plays some that you like," Jim said, smiling as Beckett smoothed back her daughter's hair as she tried to calm her down.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Me too. Do you want to go with us?" Julia then asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That's okay," Jim said, waving his hand when Beckett tried to speak.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Actually, I can ask Castle if he can manage one more ticket, there were about four seats left," Beckett said. "And it would be nice for you to go with us," she said in a whisper, leaning towards her father so Julia couldn't hear.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Ask, but if they're sold out that's fine," Jim said. "If I don't go I'll take her somewhere, just us two."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That would be nice too, whether you go to the concert or not," Beckett said, pleased at the idea. She had been trying so hard to get Julia to accept her grandfather the two had never spent that much time alone together since she had been with them to help her daughter.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Where are we going?" Julia asked interestedly, having heard that.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I don't know yet," Jim said. "Why don't you pick a place?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Somewhere besides the museum and the zoo," Beckett said quickly before her daughter could speak. She smiled when Julia pouted and she cupped the little girl's cheek saying, "We're going this coming weekend remember. Before we go see the play."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Okay," Julia sighed. "I told Martha about the play Grandpapa," she then told him eagerly. "And she told me all about the theater where they have plays. She said it's like dancing; you go on a stage and get dressed up. And you tell a story like when you dance too."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Should I have gotten us tickets to see a ballet?" Jim asked his daughter.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, she should go see a play, and Martha said this cast for Annie was pretty amazing, she knows a few people in it," Beckett said. "Next time we'll check out a ballet or some other dancing show. How's the pelmeni?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> The rest of the meal Jim kept up the conversation by asking his granddaughter about her two week vacation and what she and her mother did with Castle. After, when he was helping Beckett clean up the dishes, he asked, "So she's okay around him now?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She is," Beckett replied, looking over at Julia who was coloring at the coffee table. "It took a few days, but she warmed up to him. It helped that we had a long talk about Castle's and my relationship before we left."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Does she trust Alexis and Martha?" Jim asked, handing her a clean plate.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She does, she did when… before when they watched her a few months ago," Beckett said, faltering slightly. "Alexis actually watched her one night, when she and Martha arrived in the Hamptons. Castle and I had dinner out together and Martha had a party, so it was just them."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Did she enjoy that?" Jim said as he glanced at Julia when Beckett did again.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She did," Beckett said, smiling. "She missed me that whole night, but when I put her to bed, she asked when Alexis would watch her again." She saw her father start to speak and then hesitate and she said quickly, "If you're wondering about the arrangement I have with Martha to watch Julia, we're just having a two week trial first. It's not permanent."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I honestly wasn't sure about the idea at first," Jim said in a low voice to his daughter. "But I know you trust Martha, and I know Alexis is a responsible young woman, I just hope Julia will be happy while you're at work."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She won't be," Beckett said. "No child is when their parents aren't with them at her age, but it'll make me come home and not obsess over my job as much. Well, I probably still will, but I'll likely be doing it more from home than before."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Welcome to being a parent Katie," Jim said. He smiled as his daughter did so, checking on Julia at the same time. He then grew a little serious and said, "I wanted to wait a little to tell you this; wait to see how you were with Julia; and I'm pretty certain I can say this with all confidence."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Say what?" Beckett asked, looking at her father in confusion.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That your mother would be incredibly proud of you," Jim said. "She would agree with me when I say that you're a wonderful mother. But that doesn't surprise me, you were raised by one of the best… barring my own mother of course."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Of course," Beckett said with a slight laugh. "I just wish…" she began with a sigh, growing serious.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I know, she would love Julia," Jim said, hugging his daughter and patting her back. "She is a very sweet girl, and she reminds me a little of you at that age."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "A little, I think I was more of a tomboy than she is," Beckett said, getting her tears under control, not wanting to worry her daughter. "Thank you though, for that."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You're welcome," Jim said. "Why don't we get dessert?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Sure," Beckett said quickly, knowing that he wanted to get past that reminder of the absence of her mother. She quickly got the dessert she'd put in the oven to keep warm and then called out, "Julia, dessert's ready."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "What did you get Mommy?" Julia asked happily as she skipped over to the kitchen.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Let me have a hug first and then I'll show you," Beckett said. She was relieved when Julia nodded; not asking why she wanted a hug; and picked her up, holding her tightly.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Mommy, are you sad?" Julia asked, pulling back a little.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Why do you say that?" Beckett replied.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You hug me like that when you get sad," Julia answered, covering her mother's cheeks with her hands. "Don't be sad Mommy, there's dessert and Grandpapa's here."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Laughing, sounding a little choked up, Beckett shared a quick kiss with Julia before she said, "You're right, why don't we have our dessert with your grandpapa and watch something before he needs to get home?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, will you Grandpapa?" Julia asked, looking over at him.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Of course," Jim said, squeezing his daughter's arm gently. "What's for dessert?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Blini!" Julia cried out eagerly when she saw the plate of pastries covered in red sauce. "And strawberries too. These are very, very good," she told her grandfather seriously.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Smiling, Beckett dished out the dessert for the three of them before they went to the coffee table. She put on a movie; Julia instructing her to decide; and sat on the couch with her daughter on her lap. "This is Julia's favorite, so I thought she would like to see it," she told her father as the menu for The McCartney Years DVD came up.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "This is the one Castle bought for me!" Julia squealed. "What do we watch Mommy?" she asked happily.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Which one do you want to see?" Beckett asked as she handed the box to her father so he could see it.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "The one for Pipes of Peace," Julia said. She quickly ate a blin, and then set her plate down, wrapping her arms tightly around her mother as the music video started. She then asked to see the music video for the song Fine Line when she looked up at her mother and said, "Can I see for Mamunia?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yes, but you really need to eat your dessert, it's getting late and I want to get you into bed early," Beckett said, picking up a blin with Julia's fork and feeding it to her.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It was nice of Castle to buy this for her," Jim said as Julia was busy watching the music video for C Moon after they had watched Mamunia.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Are you wondering why he did that?" Beckett asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, I understand it's because of you," Jim said. "But front seat tickets to see Paul?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I told you the times he's done stuff like that for me," Beckett said with a slight smile. "He tends to go a little… crazy, but he does know how to make people happy. He's definitely made Julia happy."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Jim didn't say anything for a moment, knowing his daughter included herself in that last statement as well. He then said, "Would you mind if I got her a movie?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It depends on what it is," Beckett said after she had chosen the video for Ou Est Le Soleil for her daughter.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It's the first time Paul played at Shea, when they reopened it," Jim said quickly as they watched Julia bouncing up and down on the couch; her dessert plate luckily on the coffee table.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That's perfect," Beckett said. "Okay, one more video sweetie, and then you need to go to bed."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She's right, we both need to get some sleep," Jim said quickly before Julia could protest.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You have to go to bed too?" Julia asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I have to get up very early for work," Jim said.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Do you go to court?" Julia then queried eagerly. When her grandfather nodded she looked at her mother and said excitedly, "Can we watch This Song?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Of course, but your grandpapa might have seen it before," Beckett said as she went to YouTube which was on the blu-ray player.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Actually I haven't, I do like the song though," Jim said.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You know it?" Beckett asked in surprise, glancing at him as she waited for the search results to show up on the screen.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I was always a big fan of George, your mother more of Paul's," Jim said.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Beckett smiled and then quickly started the music video saying, "Don't get mad at George for this one, remember he was sued and ended up losing the case."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Jim looked at her in confusion before Julia squealed as the video began and he turned to look at the screen. He chuckled as it took place in a courtroom, and he found himself glancing at Beckett a few times in surprise at some of the different aspects of the video. "You're sure it's okay for your daughter to see that?" he asked when it ended with everyone in the room dancing to the end of the song.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She doesn't understand everything," Beckett said. "She- yes sweetie?" she asked Julia who was tugging her hand. "Wait, let me guess, True Love." She smiled when her daughter nodded rapidly and she quickly got that music video started.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Look, he's gonna fall," Julia squealed, sitting on her grandfather's lap by the end of the video.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Someone should have told him about the bridge- oh, well, never mind," Jim said as Julia giggled wildly as in the video George Harrison knelt in the boat he was singing on before falling backwards. "That's a good song, I like that version."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Version?" Julia asked, pronouncing the word carefully.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That's not George's song," Jim said, holding Julia as she turned to him. "But he sings it pretty well I think, don't you?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah," Julia said, watching as her mother took the dessert plates to the kitchen. As Beckett was rinsing them, she had her grandfather help her down and she ran around behind the couch, peeping out from the back.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Julia," Beckett said as she came back over and easily spotted her daughter. "You need to go to bed."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I don't wanna Mommy," Julia said in protest. She scooted behind the middle of the couch as Beckett walked over and curled up a little. She cried out as she was suddenly picked up and started to squirm.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Julia, stop, I'm going to drop you!" Beckett said warningly. She was relieved when her daughter did so, but was tense in her arms as she sat on the couch.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'd better get going," Jim said as Julia covered her eyes with her hands.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Say goodbye to your grandpapa, please sweetie?" Beckett asked, taking Julia's hands off her face.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Wrapping her arms around Jim as he picked her up, Julia said, "Do I have to go to bed?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'm afraid so," he answered, carrying her to the door. "You need to get some sleep before school tomorrow."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I don't wanna," Julia sighed, hugging him tightly.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You'll have fun at school," Jim said. "And I hope you'll draw something else for me in your class."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Can I?" Julia asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You'll probably be able to color during class," Beckett said, picking Julia's picture up from the chair and carefully putting it into the bag her father had brought. "So it'll be fun sweetie, I promise."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She's right," Jim said. "And I'll come on Tuesday, to see you both and you can tell me how your first day of school went. Okay?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Kay," Julia said, her tone quiet.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Goodnight Julia," Jim said. He kissed her cheek before she kissed his and then set her down. "Let me know how she does tomorrow," he told Beckett as she hugged him.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'll give you a call when I can," she replied with a smile.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "And take it easy if you get a case tomorrow," Jim said. "I don't want to find out you collapsed again."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I know, don't worry Dad, I'll be fine," Beckett said before she opened the door. "Get home safe."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Goodnight Katie, thank you for dinner," Jim said as he stepped out.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Thank you for our gifts," Beckett said, standing in the doorway with Julia.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, thank you for the book and pretty rock!" Julia said eagerly. "Oh! And my new shirts."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You're very welcome Julia," Jim said with a slight laugh. "Night."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Night," Beckett and Julia called as he started to walk down the hall.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> As soon as her grandfather was out of sight, Julia turned around and tried to run, intending to go behind the couch again. But she screamed shortly as she was picked up from behind, and she kicked her legs crying out, "No, no, no!"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Julia! Stop it," Beckett said, sounding a lot stricter than she had wanted to. She sighed when her daughter froze and then started to cry. "Sweetie, I'm sorry," she said, cradling Julia in her arms as she walked into her room. She sat on the edge of the bed and held her tightly, still holding her as if she were a baby. "I know you don't want to go to bed and I know you're scared about tomorrow, but it's something you have to do," she said soothingly as she got a tissue and wiped off the little girl's damp cheeks. "I always hated the first day of school," she said, pressing her lips to Julia's forehead.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Y-You did for real?" Julia stammered, sniffing heavily.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "When I was your age, yes. I was always so scared I wouldn't be able to see my friends from the year before and it's always hard to have new teachers," Beckett said. "But every year I was still able to play with my friends, even if they weren't in my class. And as for my teachers, they always encouraged reading. Though when I was in fourth grade until junior high they really didn't like it when I would read my books from home during lessons."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You did that?" Julia asked, a teary smile on her face.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I did, I couldn't help it, I loved to read as much as you do," Beckett said. "That's why I'm so happy I went to school, I learned to read and I could read whatever I wanted when I was grown up. Just like you'll be able to do if you go to school."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Julia let out a shuddering sigh and said, "I want you to teach me Mommy, I remember I had a teacher at home."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I know," Beckett said, tensing up slightly at her daughter's recollection of her life before she had met her. "But I want you to have friends, and don't forget, you'll have ballet after school. Now come on, why don't I give you a bath and we'll read an extra ten pages tonight? Something special for your last day of summer." She felt relieved when Julia nodded, a wide smile on her face, and she gently wiped her cheeks dry before taking her into her bathroom.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Julia seemed to have recovered as she splashed in the water in the tub, her mother letting her play with her sponges in different shapes a little longer than she normally did. Finally though, Beckett took her out and got her dressed in her summer pajamas before carrying her to her room. On the bed, she listened with rapt attention as her mother read twenty pages of Little House in the Big Woods until she stopped. "Oh Mommy, we almost finished it," she said, holding the rest of the book they had to read.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "We can try and finish it tomorrow," Beckett said firmly as she put the book on the nightstand. "You must be tired so come on, under the covers," she said. She wasn't surprised when her daughter shook her head and she sighed before she took her into her arms, holding her close. With her other hand, she reached under her blouse and took out her necklace, letting Julia take her mother's ring into her small hand. She watched as the little girl slipped the ring on her much thinner thumb, and rubbed it along the stone at the top. She didn't say a word, simply rocked gently back and forth, not knowing how long it took before Julia was limp in her arms.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Very carefully, Beckett tucked Julia underneath the bed sheet after taking her mother's ring from her grasp. She gave her daughter a gentle kiss before she stood up and left, closing the door behind her. She went out to the kitchen; feeling drained all of a sudden; and made a cup of coffee before she sat on the couch, looking through the book her father had given her. She was unsure how long she was reading and looking at the pictures, but a knock on the door jolted her from a picture of a Faberge egg, and she hurriedly set the book down before rushing to the door. "Hey," she said after checking to see who it was.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You okay?" Castle asked as he stepped inside and set his overnight bag on the chair. "You look tired," he said as he took Beckett into his arms, hugging her tightly.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Julia, she's… still nervous about tomorrow," Beckett replied as she embraced him before they let go of each other. "It took longer than normal to put her to bed, but I'll be okay. Coffee?" she asked, turning to the kitchen.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "There's something else," Castle said, following her and leaning against the counter next to the brewer as she got a mug ready and started the machine.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She remembered her tutor," Beckett said slowly. "That her mother hired for her. It always unsettles me when she does that, there are times when I feel like she's my daughter. Not just by adoption."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She didn't remember her mother did she?" Castle asked, watching her closely.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, I think she thinks that I hired the tutor," Beckett said, handing Castle the filled mug.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "But you're still her mother Kate," Castle said carefully. "She-"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Beckett hurriedly covered his mouth with her hand when she heard the sound of small footsteps running. A second later Julia ran out of the room and towards them. "Julia, you're supposed to be asleep," she said in surprise as her daughter ran past her and to Castle.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yeah, I thought I wasn't going to see you until tomorrow," Castle said, picking her up as she held her arms out to him. "But it's nice to see you. Did you have a nightmare?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, I woke up," Julia said seriously. "And I heard you talking to my mommy. I wanted to show you this," she said, holding out the pyrite rock. "My grandpapa gave it to me."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That's pretty cool," Castle said, taking it. "You don't mind if I take this with me…" he trailed off. He laughed slightly as Julia quickly said no and grabbed her rock, giggling at the same time. He glanced at Beckett and said, "I think though you should get back to bed."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yes," Beckett said before Julia could say anything in response. "Come on sweetie, I'll tuck you back in."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Castle followed, standing in the doorway as Beckett helped her daughter under the sheet and tucked it around her. He smiled slightly as Julia reached out and grabbed Johanna Beckett's ring that slipped out from her mother's blouse.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "We'll see you in the morning sweetie," Beckett said, letting the little girl slip the ring on her index finger that time. "I love you Julia," she said before she shared a kiss with her.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I love you too Mommy," Julia replied, yawning a little. "Night Castle," she said sleepily, waving at him.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Goodnight Julia," Castle said. When Beckett got up and walked over to him after sharing another kiss with her daughter, he took her hand as they watched Julia, who was soon sleeping. "She should sleep now," he said reassuringly to her as she tucked her necklace back under her blouse.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I know," Beckett said simply as she shut the door. "Your coffee's getting cold," she said, turning to walk to the kitchen. She was surprised when Castle grabbed her wrist, and she looked at him. "I'm fine," she said to his look of concern. "A little guilty, wanting her to forget her life before we left Queens, but other than that I'm good. I feel a lot better than I did two weeks ago, and I'm ready to get back to my life as a cop and mother. And seeing if I'll do a better job with that than I did the past three months. So, your coffee?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Castle, who was smiling slightly at her speech, followed her into the kitchen and grabbed his mug before following her to her room. "And her school?" he asked as he unpacked his things for the next day in his drawer while she started to change behind him.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She's still nervous," Beckett said evenly. "Which comes as no surprise. We'll see how she does tomorrow."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Glancing over his shoulder at her use of 'we' instead of 'I' Castle leaned against the dresser as she pulled down the sheets on the bed.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "How did it go taking Alexis?" Beckett asked, sitting against the headboard once she was finished.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Uh, not bad," Castle said. "She's got a new roommate, a girl from Sausalito, California."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I remember that city," Beckett said with a smile as she looked at the calendar app on her tablet. "It's a sweet little seaside community. Should be interesting for her, moving to the big city from that community."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Well, she's really nice, Diana, that's her name," Castle commented, walking over to the bed after he had finished changing himself. "We met her earlier. But Alexis is pretty settled this year."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "So was it easier when you and your mom left?" Beckett asked, wrapping her arms around her knees.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Slightly easier for us," Castle said. He then smiled a little absently as he said, "When we left Alexis was talking to Diana about California, telling her about her trip to LA while Diana was talking about Northern California."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "So it sounds like they're going to be pretty friendly," Beckett said before she paused. "Unless it was an argument about the two halves of the state. I had a friend at Stanford who was from LA, she transferred to UCLA after one semester, she couldn't stand being up north."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, Diana's a fan of the whole state," Castle said. "So it was an amicable discussion." They fell silent then and he turned to her saying, "Any reason why you're wearing that?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "This?" Beckett asked, looking down at herself. She had put on her nightgown, not really thinking about the choice, just wanting to wear it. "I like it," she said with a shrug. "Do I really need any other reason to wear it?" she asked with a slight smile.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, no, of course not," Castle said, clearing his throat.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "And you're supposed to be a great poker player?" Beckett asked, scooting over to him then and sitting on his lap. "Oh, no you're not," she said, smiling wider as she could easily feel his predicament.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Poker and this are two very different things," Castle said in slight protest. "Besides, you don't want to get some sleep?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It's still pretty early," Beckett said. She didn't let him reply to that; instead she leaned over, kissing him as deeply as she could. His immediate reaction; grasping her so tightly his fingertips sank into her back; filled her with a thrill and she wrapped her arms around him tightly before she slowly pulled away.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Okay," Castle said simply as they looked at each other, panting slightly. He pushed her back on the bed, following her quickly as he crushed her lips underneath his own. He reached down and quickly pulled on her nightgown, managing to get it up and over her hips before he pulled back. "And if we didn't end up doing this?" he asked as he touched her in between her legs and came into contact with bare, moist skin.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That possibility never really entered my mind," Beckett said with a slight smile before she sat up so he could take off the black silk completely. She helped him with his pajamas and lay back as he kissed her again, that time a lot gentler than before.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Castle and Beckett very carefully made love, taking their time to kiss and touch each other, wanting to make sure every second was something pleasurable to the other. Their climaxes were a little off that night, as Castle upped the ante, touching Beckett intimately, knowing where he could do so to get her over the edge a lot faster. But they were both very satisfied as they parted and lay back on the bed together.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Are you hopping to catch a body tomorrow?" Castle asked after a long time of silence between them. He felt Beckett, pressing against his side, move a little and he quickly said, "Sorry."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I wasn't asleep," Beckett assured him. "And I'm a little mixed up on that. I want to, I do want to get back to work, I missed it. But I would love to get the chance to pick Julia up from ballet class tomorrow."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "You might still get the chance," Castle said simply.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "It's not a sure thing," Beckett said, propping herself up on her elbow and putting her cheek on her palm. "And you?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Me what?" Castle asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Going back to work, don't you need to get back to your book?" Beckett asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "I'm actually ahead of schedule," Castle said. "So if you get a case, I'm at your disposal."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "That's good to hear," Beckett said. She lay back down, but paused when he laughed briefly. "What?"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, I remember a time when you would have said that incredibly sarcastically," Castle said. "So to hear you really mean that is pretty nice."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Yes, well, I got used to you, five years is a long time. I don't think I had much of a choice did I?" Beckett asked. She couldn't help but smile when he looked at her in confusion.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Man, you're evil, so evil," Castle said, sliding his left arm underneath her body and holding her against him. They lay in the dark; Beckett having turned off the light on her nightstand before laying down; and he held her shoulder, rubbing his hand over her skin gently before he said, "You're pretty tense."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Sighing, Beckett told him about how Julia had tried to hide to not go to bed. "It worries me how she'll always go back to being so scared. I manage to assure her, but a few hours later she's how she was in the first place," she said. "It's as if what I say doesn't even matter, which hurts a little I have to admit."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Does her psychiatrist know she's like that?" Castle asked.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She does, we've been working with her on that… but her mother really messed that up for me," Beckett said, trying not to sound angry but losing the fight. "I shouldn't talk about her like that, but with her keeping Julia out of school…"</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "She needs to get used to being around other kids a lot later in life," Castle finished when she trailed off.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "And at that age, kids don't always trust strangers, so my daughter has a lot to catch up with," Beckett sighed. "I should have asked her therapist if I should get Celia into Julia's class. Knowing she was in it, would have made it a lot better for her to adjust. Damn it, I should have just done it anyways," she said in irritation as she lay on her back.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Well, I don't think there's much we can do about that now," Castle said, turning on his side after her. "Unless I can try and talk to the principal if they're not in the same class."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "No, I get the feeling that Julia's therapist would just say it's better Celia's not her classmate," Beckett said wearily as she turned onto her side. "They might play with just each other and it wouldn't help Julia. Or Celia either."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Okay, then we'll hope they're in each other's class and if not we'll do our best to make sure she's okay before we leave," Castle said. He was a little startled at his using plural instead of talking about just Beckett, but guessed that came from her using plural before and his going with her and her daughter to the school the next morning. "Tired?" he asked as she just nodded to what he'd said.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Now I am," Beckett sighed. "Thank you by the way."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "For what?" Castle asked as he brushed some of her hair behind her ear.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "For wanting to try and get Celia into Julia's class," Beckett said. "That's very sweet of you, but I don't know if that would work."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Probably not, but what the hell, was worth a shot," Castle said, shrugging.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> "Now you see why I want you in Julia's life," Beckett said.</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Castle opened his mouth to reply to that but then stopped and took a moment before saying, "You're welcome."</em>
      </p>
      <p>
        <em> Beckett smiled at that, and then wrapped her arms around his neck as he lay on his back again. She kissed him lightly on the lips before he cupped the back of her head, holding her close as they kissed deeper and longer. When they stopped, she pressed her cheek to his shoulder and murmured a goodnight, hearing him say the same as he slid his arm around her waist before she closed her eyes and was quickly falling asleep, still unsure of the next day, trying to forget her slight unease in his embrace.</em>
      </p>
      <hr/>
      <p>"Okay, I think you're all ready sweetie," Beckett said as she zipped Julia's little blue backpack closed. "Say goodbye to Stitch and Kauai and then we'll go," she said, watching as Julia got up on the stool at her dresser and set her doll next to the fish tank.</p>
      <p>Castle, standing in the doorway glanced at Beckett as Julia spoke seriously to her doll, telling it to play nice with the goldfish. "Are we set?" he asked as Julia hopped down.</p>
      <p>"One thing," Beckett said, reaching into her blazer pocket and pulling out a small jewelry box. "Come here Julia," she said, gesturing to her daughter. She opened it, and showed her daughter the bracelet inside.</p>
      <p>"Is that for me?" Julia asked shyly as Beckett took it out and had her hold her arm out.</p>
      <p>"See this? That's a J, a C and a B, for your name; Julia Claire Beckett," Beckett said with a smile as she closed the bracelet around her wrist. "And on the other side is your birthday. March 17th, 2009."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia breathed as she wrapped her arms around her mother tightly.</p>
      <p>"I wanted you to have something special for your very first day of school," Beckett said, kissing the top of her head as she held her tightly to her. "And I had a bracelet just like that from your grandmama when I was your age."</p>
      <p>Smiling, Julia fingered the letters on the front of the silver ID bracelet and said, "I like it Mommy, a lot, a lot."</p>
      <p>"I'm glad to hear," Beckett said. "We need to go now though." She picked Julia up when the little girl started to bite her lower lip and took her backpack before leaving the room. "Thanks," she said to Castle as he took the backpack when she passed him.</p>
      <p>"Not a problem, I wanted to see what you have here," he said. "A little Stitch, very cute," he said to Julia who was looking over her mother's shoulder at him. "And some Beatles pins, pretty nice."</p>
      <p>"Grandpapa gave me Stitch," Julia said, smiling at him. "And Mommy gave me the pins."</p>
      <p>"She made some good choices," Castle said. "Your two favorite albums I see."</p>
      <p>"Yeah," Julia said, laughing as Beckett put her down.</p>
      <p>"Okay," Beckett said after she had checked her work bag at the door. "Your lunch box sweetie," she said, handing the old fashioned metal box to her daughter.</p>
      <p>"Whoa, where did you get that?" Castle said as he took it from Julia.</p>
      <p>"Same place I got her pins," she replied. "Julia picked it out herself. Sweetie, I put something special for your first day in there, eat it last though okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay," Julia said, giggling as she was watching Castle looking closely at the lunchbox which was pictures of the Beatles from their movie <em>Help!</em> "Or does Castle take it to work with you?"</p>
      <p>"Oh, nice one," Castle said, handing it to her. "That's a nice lunchbox," he said as they left the apartment. He held Julia's hand as they waited for Beckett to lock the door and said, "You'll be a pretty cool kid in your class you know."</p>
      <p>Julia laughed bashfully and swung her hand and Castle's before her mother walked over to them. "Is he right Mommy?" she asked as Beckett took her other hand and they walked down the hallway.</p>
      <p>"I think so," Beckett said. She smiled down at Julia as her daughter hugged her tightly while they went down to the lobby in the elevator, smiling slightly at the woman and little boy who had already been inside when they'd gotten on.</p>
      <p>"First day of school?" the woman asked.</p>
      <p>"Kindergarten," Beckett answered with a nod.</p>
      <p>"Fourth grade," the woman replied.</p>
      <p>Beckett smiled at the young boy before she led Julia out to grab a cab which Castle hailed. On the way to the school, she had to struggle a little with Julia, as she kept trying to sit on her lap. They finally stopped and as Castle took care of the fare; despite her protest; she led Julia out. As they waited for him, she was a little startled to hear a whimper next to her. "Sweetie," she said, turning and seeing that her daughter was looking at the older kids as they went inside the open gates of the Mt. Surrey-on-Hudson School. "They're in another building," she said quickly. "So you won't see them, just when you come to school and leave." She looked up as Castle walked to them and watched as he knelt down in front of her daughter.</p>
      <p>"You know Alexis almost went to this school?" Castle asked as he held Julia's hands. When she shook her head he said, "Seriously, I almost had her go here, but decided to let her go to the schools she went to instead. I told your mom about this school when she was looking where to send you, and this was the best one. You won't see the older kids, they're in other buildings, and you'll have your own recess and lunch too. Plus they let the younger kids out of school earlier than the older grades."</p>
      <p>"Are you sure?" Julia asked.</p>
      <p>"Very sure, I checked for your mom," Castle said before he stood up. When Julia whispered a thank you he took her hand and said, "You're welcome. Why don't we go see your class now?"</p>
      <p>"Mommy?" Julia asked, sounding panicked as she turned around.</p>
      <p>"I'm coming, I want to see it too," Beckett said, taking Julia's hand in her own. She squeezed it gently as they headed for the elementary school building and went to the bulletin boards that had class rosters pinned to them. "Let me see where we need to go okay?" she said gently as they couldn't go up to look together, too many students and parents there already.</p>
      <p>Julia looked around the hall as she waited for her mother, holding Castle's hand tightly. She looked down at the floor and at the artwork on the walls trying to find a distraction before Beckett walked back.</p>
      <p>"Okay, we're in room three," she said as Julia ran over to her, hugging her tightly. She started to walk towards the room when her daughter stopped her by grabbing her legs.</p>
      <p>"Carry me Mommy, please?" Julia begged in a whisper.</p>
      <p>"You can walk," Beckett said gently, pulling her daughter off of her and taking her hand. Julia started to pull back and she turned to look at her when Castle quickly walked up to the little girl's other side and grabbed her hand. Together they managed to get Julia to the room, and she peered inside before saying, "Want to meet your teacher?"</p>
      <p>Julia didn't say anything, her green eyes seemed to be huge in her pale face, but she nodded slowly before Beckett took her in the room. She looked back at Castle and saw that he was following them before she suddenly ran into her mother.</p>
      <p>"Ms. Beckett, it's great to see you again," a young woman said, shaking her hand. "And this must be Julia," she said, smiling down at the little girl who was looking at her from around her mother. "I'm Mrs. Clayton, your teacher; it's nice to get to meet you."</p>
      <p>"Hi," Julia whispered.</p>
      <p>Glancing at Beckett, Mrs. Clayton knelt down enough so she was face to face with Julia and gently said, "I know you're a little scared, but I can promise you I'll make sure everyone in the class gets along well. And there are some other girls and some boys too who will want to play with you." She then looked past Castle and smiled saying, "I think there's one who will want to definitely play with you."</p>
      <p>Julia looked a little confused, until her mother turned her around, and she gasped when she saw Celia walking in with her parents. She waved from around her mother, smiling widely as her friend waved back.</p>
      <p>"I'm glad to see you know someone in the class," Mrs. Clayton said, standing up. "I'll let you say goodbye before school starts."</p>
      <p>"Are you happy sweetie?" Beckett asked, taking Julia's backpack off for her.</p>
      <p>"Yes, lots, but I don't want you to leave Mommy," Julia said as they walked to the cubby holes where children were putting away backpacks and lunches.</p>
      <p>"Neither do I, but I do have work," Beckett said. "Let's find your name… here," she said, seeing the label with her daughter's name. "See? Julia B. so go ahead and put your things there." She smiled at Castle and then said, "But I'll see you later tonight, as soon as possible okay?"</p>
      <p>"Kay, but will you be safe Mommy?" Julia asked a little worriedly.</p>
      <p>"She will be," Castle said quickly. "I'll make sure she is."</p>
      <p>"Thank you," Julia said.</p>
      <p>"We need to go," Beckett said. "School's going to start soon sweetie, and I'm sure you want to talk to Celia before it does. Say goodbye to Castle."</p>
      <p>"Thank you for coming with me," Julia said, going over to him. She tugged on his hand until he was kneeling down and she hugged him quickly around the neck. "And for watching my mommy too."</p>
      <p>"You're welcome," Castle said with a smile, hugging her back. "I hope you have a great day at school, you'll have to tell me and Alexis all about it. After you tell your mother and mine of course." He stood up as Julia turned and ran to Beckett, throwing her arms around her neck tightly.</p>
      <p>"Remember Julia," Beckett said, kissing her cheek. "Martha is going to go to your ballet class to pick you up, so don't leave the school at all until she gets you."</p>
      <p>"I won't Mommy, I'll be good so you don't hafta worry about me," Julia said seriously.</p>
      <p>"Thank you for that," Beckett said. "Now please listen to your teacher, and pay attention. Play nicely with the other kids, and be careful. And one last thing," she said as she held Julia by the arms.</p>
      <p>"What?" Julia asked, thinking it was another admonition.</p>
      <p>"I love you very much sweetie, and I can't wait to see you after your first day of school," Beckett said with a smile.</p>
      <p>"I love you too Mommy," Julia said with a slight giggle as she wrapped her arms around her mother's neck. They hugged tightly before she shared a kiss with Beckett. She held onto her neck again, to keep her from letting go, and said, "I'll miss you Mommy."</p>
      <p>"I will too, but you'll have fun," Beckett whispered against her hair. "Go and play with your friend. Tell her about how you got to go sailing with us."</p>
      <p>Julia's lower lip trembled as Beckett stood up, and she hugged her around the waist tightly before she ran to Celia, whose parents were walking to the doorway. "I don't want my mommy to go," she whispered to her friend.</p>
      <p>"Me too," Celia whispered back, grabbing her hand.</p>
      <p>Beckett forced herself to walk to the doorway, only turning there to wave to Julia, who was watching her. She was pleased; watching her daughter; when the teacher went up to the two girls, drawing them over to some blocks at a table. She felt a hand on her back and glanced up at Castle before saying, "We better go," wincing inwardly as her voice was a little shaky with emotion. She led the way out of the school, and as they went down the stairs of the building she asked abruptly, "Does that ever get any easier?"</p>
      <p>"To some extent," Castle said in complete empathy. "But it's hard to let go of your child, even when you know you'll be seeing them that afternoon."</p>
      <p>Sighing Beckett said, "Now I see why you camped out outside of Alexis' school."</p>
      <p>"Well, there's some nice foliage across the street. Would be good cover," Castle said.</p>
      <p>Laughing under her breath, Beckett shook her head and said, "I'm not going to hover around my daughter. She needs to know I'm not going to be around constantly. And I want her to get the best education she can, even if she just ends up being a professional dancer on <em>Dancing With the Stars</em>. Which I wouldn't mind."</p>
      <p>"Spoken like a parent," Castle said, squeezing her arm. "And she'll get a great education here."</p>
      <p>Nodding as she glanced at the building her daughter was in, Beckett was ushered with Castle out onto the sidewalk outside the grounds of the school as the bell rang and some last minute stragglers ran past them. "Okay, I feel like a coffee, badly," she said as she forced herself to turn.</p>
      <p>"Will you be okay?" Castle asked as they walked to the curb to hail a cab.<br/>"I will, just give me a little time," Beckett said, smiling when he nodded in understanding; knowing that he did. She was about to raise her hand to hail a taxi, when her phone shook in her pocket.</p>
      <p>"Did we catch a murder?" Castle asked, watching as she read her text message.</p>
      <p>"We did," Beckett said. She gave a final glance back at the school and then looked back at him saying, "Southbound traffic light in the intersection of 110th and 2nd."</p>
      <p>"What?" Castle asked in confusion.</p>
      <p>"That's what it says," Beckett said, showing him the text.</p>
      <p>"Okay, this should be an interesting case; right out of the blocks too. After you Detective," Castle said, raising his hand in the air after he'd seen she was right.</p>
      <p>Smiling at that, Beckett quickly squeezed his hand before saying, "I'll see you there after you get my coffee."</p>
      <p>"Got the hint," Castle said with a smile before they shared a very quick kiss and he opened the door of the cab that had stopped for him. He closed the door after Beckett was in and watched her go, not surprised she was looking at the building where her daughter was before turning away.</p>
      <p>Leaning back against the seat, Beckett took a few deep breaths. She knew her daughter was safe and only hoped that Julia would be able to settle into school. But she had a feeling that their two weeks with Castle had gotten both her and Julia settled into their lives, the house in Queens becoming a distant memory. Smiling as there was no pang accompanying the thought; Beckett looked out the window and turned her thought process back to how it began to work at the beginning of an investigation. As was normal she still thought about Julia; the realization that she wasn't struck with anxiety pondering the latter meaning; to her; that she had most likely been able to find a balance between her career and her daughter. With fresh determination, she looked down at her phone, and brought up a map, checking the address of the homicide, familiarizing herself with the location, prepared to return to work.</p>
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